AN: Hey you guyss! I decided to start another fanfic, but with Remus as our 'Fabio'. I just wanted to do something different really, I'm not abandoning my other fic 'Love Will Set You Free' at all. I shall still try to update as soon as I can. Which will probably be on Tuesdays and Saturdays. I'm going to see if I can post this every Monday and Thursday. I hope you enjoy this, it's in first-person (Something I've never done before) and there are a couple of curse words, which is the reason why I've rated this as 'T' Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER; I do not own any of the magnificent characters our Queen J.K. Rowling had created for us to enjoy. Dylan and Beth are mine.

CHAPTER ONE; NEVER FEAR, THE MARAUDERS ARE HERE!

"Godammit Dylan, why aren't you listening to me?" An annoyed voice boomed. Stirring me from a book I was reading. It was called 'Bonjour Tristesse' by a French author called Francoise Sagan. It was probably the 5th time I've read it. It usually means I can avoid Beth's ramblings, but unfortunately she notices after a while.

"Ah shit, sorry Beth. You know how I get when I start reading!" I said bashfully. Closing the book and giving Beth my full attention.

"Damn right, jeez woman, it's as if you go into a trance!" Beth said with a teasing grin. Beth was so right. Sometimes I'm surprised I'm not in Ravenclaw, the amount of times I've been left embarrassed in lesson when I get a bit too absorbed in the books.

"What were you saying?" I said crossing one leg over the other, interlacing my hands. "Lie down, make yourself comfortable." I liked to annoy Beth by doing this, sometimes she spoke so much to me I felt like I was her own therapist.

"Shut up!" Beth laughed, throwing an empty box of Chocolate Frogs at me. I love Beth to death, but she really has a poor aim. It landed straight in front of her.

"Ohh, now that's embarrassing!" I smirked. Beth rolled her eyes and ate another Every Flavour Bean. We literally empty the food trolley every year. Don't judge, I just get hungry!

"And how are my lovely ladies doing this fine September 1st?"

Oh great, here's Sirius. I'm good friends with Sirius, he's a laugh. We're in the same house. He's a right old ladies man, last year it seemed that he had a different girl on his arm every week! Now that we're entering our 6th year, I doubt it's going to be any different.

"Oh hey Padfoot." Beth said cheerfully, blushing slightly. Beth has a massive crush on Sirius. She told me when we were in 3rd year.

"Where are your other musketeers?" I asked. Sirius never travelled without his little companions, I swear they are joined together by the hip or something.

"Just trying to scrimp some food from some first-years. It seems you've bought everything once again, fat cow." Sirius replied and poked his tongue out.

"Fuck off!" I laughed. Cheeky git, he always loves to wind me up!

"So how was your holiday, Richards?" Sirius asked me whilst taking a seat next to Beth. Jeez, I don't think I've seen a tomato as red as Beth's face.

"Same old, same old, Black. Went skiing in the alps, shot some ducks." I replied sarcastically, rolling my eyes. I'm lucky enough to come from a rich family. My mum's a muggle architect and my dad works for the Ministry of Magic as an Auror. He's in charge of the department.

"Poor ducks, you know that's the first sign of a serial killer, Dylan. I hope you know that!" Sirius replied with a wink.

"In that case, I'd better watch out if I were you. I'm always looking for volunteers to practise on." I smirked back. How I've missed mine and Sirius' banter.

"How was yours Beth?" Sirius asked politely. I tried to give him a warning look. Man is he going to regret asking her that!

"My holiday was great, we went camping in the Lake District and I caught a fish. It rained the whole time, and the tent got soaked through. I really wanted to dry us all off with a quick charm, but obviously I'm not old enough to do it yet. So…" I zoned out at this point, poor Beth. She must have been hit with the diarrhoea of the mouth curse or something when she was younger. She pretty much never stops talking, she even talks in her sleep for Godric's sake!

"That's great Beth, really great!" I said with a false sense of enthusiasm, giving a pointed look at Sirius who was trying desperately hard not to smirk.

"Oh it was, I loved it." She ended with a sigh, looking out of the window, her ice blue eyes beginning to gloss over.

Thank Merlin for that!

"Never fear, the rest of the Marauders are here!" Sirius said enthusiastically, I looked to see what he was on about when I saw Remus, James and Peter stood at the door.

"Moony, Prongs, Wormtail." I nodded at the boys, who nodded back in return.

"Dylan, how are you my friend!" James said cheerfully, sitting down next to Sirius, whilst Remus and Peter sat next to me.

"All is well my brother, all is well. And how art thou?" I asked, doing my best Shakespearian impression. Me and James had a laugh too, although he seemed to refrain from the insults. That was clearly Sirius' job.

"I art fine…eth." James said, struggling to make his reply sound Shakespeare-ish.

"That was poor James, really poor." Remus said, causing me to look at him. Remus barely said anything when all of the Marauders were around. He usually just came out with wise cracks or to discourage James and Sirius from whatever mishap they were about to deploy. He was almost like the father of the two, but it didn't stop him from having a go at whatever they were doing.

"I agree with Moony, Prongs." I winked back at James, who blew a raspberry at me. I put a hand over my heart to fake hurt. Really, the boy was unbelievably rude sometimes!

Sirius and James launched into their own private discussion, with lots of arm waving and high-fives.

"They must be up to something." Remus whispered to me, with a barely concealed grin.

"Moony my dear, when are they NOT up to something?" I replied. Remus opened his mouth to say something, but then gave up and nodded.

"Bets on it having something to do with Snape." Remus said back, raising an eyebrow. It was almost definitely something to do with Snape.

In our 5th year, James decided to taunt Snape big style. He disarmed him, and hung him upside down in front of pretty much all of the 5th year Gryffindors. James also made Snape's trousers fall down, revealing some rather nasty, grey undergarments. Lilly ran to his rescue, of course. They were best friends at the time, but Snape got so mad he called her a 'mudblood', which is pretty much the worst thing you can call a muggle-born witch/wizard.

They haven't spoken since, well, apart from Snape trying to apologise to her. All of the marauders now dislike Snape, a lot. And since that incident they've bullied him pretty badly, I even saw Snape cry once.

I quite like Severus though, we've been partnered up in Potions and Defence Against The Dark Arts quite a lot, and he's a really clever guy. We get along, most of the time. He has a real bad temper on him, I remember one time he snapped at me for asking him a question.

I feel sorry for him, I told Lilly to forgive him loads of times, but she just tells me to go away. It's a shame really, he really likes Lilly and some say he even loves her.

"I would bet all of my life savings that it is Moony. You know how much they hate Snape." I said with a shrug.

"True. Anyway, Dylan…What's that you're reading?" Remus asked, pointing to my book.

"Bonjour Tristesse." I replied, holding the book up, and presenting it as if I was on some sort of shopping channel that you get on TV.

"Again?" Remus asked with a bemused expression. "I can't believe I didn't recognise the cover, I believe that's the 3rd time you've read that?"

"5th, actually. I read it during the summer." I replied with a wink. I don't know what he's talking about, I've seen Remus read To Kill A Mockingbird at least 10 times, not that I'm counting of course!

"Oh right, was that during your stay in your Tuscany Villa?"

"Not you too, Moony!" I replied feigning shock. Cheeky bugger, I swear all marauders are just the same! Remus chuckled at this and relaxed back in his seat. It wasn't that long to go before we arrived at Hogwarts.

I decided this would be a good time to start reading my book again, it was an effective time-waster.

Before too long the Hogwarts Express had pulled into Hogsmeade and the students were desperate to get off the train. I woke up Beth, who had fallen asleep since the last time I spoke to her. She looked a bit bleary eyed, and her blonde hair was sticking humorously up at one side. I didn't want to tell her, purely because she looked funny, but I knew that if she did actually find out that I didn't tell her, she would punch me.

AN: I hope you enjoyed this guys, it's a bit different I know, I really want to know what you think of this. Please leave a review, your opinions matter so much to me!