If Demigods had iPhones…
Messed up conversations, twisted sayings, and hilarious auto correct texts.
Conversation 1: Percy and Annabeth
Percy: Leaving in 5. Preheat the ocean to 425.
Annabeth: Haha. That might take a while and severely damage the fish supply…and your Dad… :)
Percy: Fuck this phone, I mean *OVEN*
Annabeth: Haha ok Percy.
Conversation 2: Jason and Piper
Piper: Come over to cabin 10 if you can
Piper: Leo's outside trying to fuck the door and it isn't pretty.
Jason: what the hell are you talking about?
Piper: Just what I said
Piper: Fix the door! Oh my gods! Not the other thing. Leo would never do that.
Jason: LOL im ROFL! Ok, I cant be there til 2
Conversation 3: Katie and Travis
Katie: Hey! You wanna come over to cabin 4 and play with my clit?
Travis: …is this a trick question?
Katie: Oh gods! No I mean vtech!
Katie: I just got a vtech and I know you wanted one
*Katie sends pic of vtech*
Travis: so your saying that I cant play with your clit…
Conversation 4: Connor and Clarisse
Connor: hey Clarisse! How'd you do on the Archery test?
Clarisse: I failed, prissy. :(
Connor: HAHAHA FAIL! :D
Clarisse: you know what else is a fail?
Clarisse: Hermes's condom.
Conversation 5: Connor and Travis
Connor: hey did you know mom's trying to get in touch with you?
Travis: yeah she pissed me off yesterday, so I stabbed her.
Connor: YOU STABBED HER?
Connor: Have you lost your freaking mind?
Travis: I meant I ignored her. I didn't stab her. Fuck you auto correct.
Connor: oh my gods.
Conversation 6: Thalia and Nico
Thalia: Blahhhh I feel like total crap. I'm so sick.
Nico: Aw I'm sorry to hear that babe.
Nico: if you want, you can come over and lay on my cock.
Thalia: Gods you have such a one track mind. I said I'm sick.
Nico: I swear to the river styx I meant couch.
Thalia: hahahahahahahahaha 3
Conversation 7: Leo and Jason
Leo: I just porked my hot Archery teacher
Jason: I hope you get an A in her class now
Leo: poked, on facebook.
Leo: I did not pork her
Jason: big diference bro
Leo: duck this auto cumulonimbus
Jason: LMFAO that's a rain cloud
Conversation 8: Leo and Piper
Leo: how was breakfast? What did you get?
Piper: it was good, I ate a nutsack.
Piper: I ATE A NUTSACK
Piper: Fuck off phone, I ate the short staff
Piper: THE FUCKING SHORT STACK OF PANCAKES
Leo: sounds filling. Lol
Piper: shut up. -_-
Conversation 9: Clovis and Annabeth
Clovis: look it's a whale
Annabeth: you have no social life, do you?
Clovis: baby whale
Conversation 10: Piper and Leo ( I know, but this one fits it well)
Leo: Hey… just wanted to let you know that Jason is sleeping around
Piper: WHAT THE FUCK WITH WHO
Piper: Is it Drew? I knew it. I'm going to fucking castrate him. Can you help me put the fire?
Piper: he's fucking insane, isn't he
Leo: wow sorry I meant he is sleeping already. Not around-
Leo: I'm sorry I freaked you out…
Piper: Gods damn it Leo
So? How do you lick it? God dammit, see? Typo. I mean like. He he…. I was just wondering… if demigods really had iPhones, but iPhones has this barrier, so the monsters wouldn't hear the signal. Ha, be brave my little marshmallows,