Sion glowed even in darkness.
It wasn't about the snowy white hair or the blazing crimson eyes that were now hidden under his eyelids as he slept. During daytime, every time he stepped out of the shadows, sunlight seemed to embrace him with an affectionate fondness. As if it loved him. Even at night, when there was no sun or even without the luster of the moon bathing the wasteland with its rays, Sion always seemed to glowagainst the pitch-black background. Nezumi could observe this, but he could not explain it. It was just one of those mysteries that were to remain inexplicable as long as he lived.
Still, Nezumi couldn't help but wonder as he watched Sion sleep beside him and as he felt the heat radiating from his limp body from under the blanket. How could he look so peaceful? How could he still glow even as he slept? Nezumi was used to watching him sleep like this, but it never failed to baffle him. Especially at times like this when he felt like he could give away half of his library to see what Sion was seeing, although knowing that by morning, he would conceivably regret that decision.
He couldn't identify Sion. He couldn't interpret half of his actions, make sense of half of his sentences and come to terms with rest of what little he could comprehend about him. And there were no answers that were written on his face for Nezumi to read. Sion only remained to be a mystery. A sleeping mystery at that.
Why do I try to solve him so desperately anyway? Why can't I just turn away from him and go to sleep?
Sion turned in his sleep, facing Nezumi. His lips parted as he let out a long sigh. Nezumi felt his breath against his right cheek. Watching him dive into deeper levels of unconsciousness, Nezumi thought he looked even more lucent up close. So much that looking at him for so long hurt his eyes. A tuft of white hair had fallen over his right eye. Nezumi itched to brush it away yet he restrained himself. He turned, pulling his gaze away from Sion's sleeping face and stared at the ceiling instead.
Sion's face was imprinted before his eyelids. Nezumi blinked several times in the darkness to regain his ability to see without distracting, flashy objects like Sion's floating head obscuring his vision, but to no avail. He raised his hand over his eyes and rubbed them with his fingers. He felt a sigh rise inside his chest and just for once, covered in the tightly woven darkness around him, he let it slide. His lungs expanded and he felt a sudden relief as he exhaled; a luxury he didn't allow himself often.
Nezumi removed his hand from his eyes and turned his head to look at Sion. His crimson eyes were fixed on him, his features showing a concerned, yet sleepy, expression.
"Are you alright?"
Nezumi turned his gaze back at the ceiling.
"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be? You go back to sleep."
He felt Sion shift on the bed, raising himself on his left elbow to look at him more closely. Of course, he had to do the exact opposite of what he was told, a typical Sion-reaction. He leaned in and his face entered Nezumi's vision, blocking his chosen ceiling view.
"Can't you sleep? Does your stomach hurt?"
There was so much worry in his voice; Nezumi couldn't bring himself to ridicule him. Sion often made him feel that way. On the verge of being crushed by a heavy wave of guilt waiting for the moment he dismissed his cordial concern.
So he simply stared into the pair of crimson eyes and replied with a voice which suggested that his concerns were entirely nonessential.
"Sion, it's nothing. I was merely laying here awake like normal people just sometimes do and I was using this excess time in my hands by doing something relatively productive; such as thinking."
The concerned look on Sion's face faded out as curiosity ignited in his eyes. He leaned in even closer, as if he was trying to read something from his expression.
"What were you thinking about?"
About how you seem to glow like a strange bioluminescent creature day and night…
"Things like the purpose of life and the meaning of my modest self's existence on this planet. Your usual light stuff."
"Isn't the purpose of life to be happy?"
Sion yawned at the last word, covering his mouth with his right hand. He said it like it was the easiest question in the world, as if everyone knew it well since birth.
How chaste… How plain it was. One would expect a much more compelling and sophisticated reasoning unprecedented in the history of time and yet, there it was, ridiculously simple and Nezumi couldn't even argue the logic of it. Across the room, on the shelves and every flat surface that could be used as a stand, were hundreds of books written in the course of several centuries all in an attempt to answer this one question which Sion easily brushed aside in his sleepy state with a mere 'to be happy' notion and a yawn that followed it.
He really was something.
Sion asked noticing Nezumi's gray eyes fixed on him.
"You are as strange as ever."
He wasn't making fun of him, not this time at least but still, a look of apprehension came over Sion and Nezumi saw his jaw clench in defiance. He was about to stubbornly defend his innocent remark, however he seemed to forget his words when Nezumi placed his hand over his right cheek.
"I don't mean it in a bad way."
The initial surprise in his eyes dissolved into warm contentment and Sion leaned his face into his palm. Nezumi brushed his scar with his thumb, unable to take his eyes off of his scorching crimson gaze and feeling a strange sense of gravity towards him.
"You always get worked up too easily, Sion."
Nezumi wanted to break this sudden tension… to get away from it… even if meant talking nonsense. He had to pull his hand away, he had to bid him goodnight and turn around and sleep and not think about Sion.
It was like staring into the sun. It was blinding him. Sion, staring down at him with an unfamiliar expression on his face, he became all Nezumi could see. The rest of the room faded out in the background. He couldn't draw his hand back and he couldn't look away. He felt something silently stir in the pit of his stomach and at the same time he suddenly recognized the expression Sion was wearing. He had seen it so many times before but it had never once made him feel that way. It was never so intense… so overwhelming. Nezumi felt his breath catch in his throat.
Just as though confirming his worst predictions, Sion slowly closed in. As if in a daze, as if he was also surprised at his own body's actions, he leaned in until there were only a few inches between their faces.
Nezumi heard alarm in his own voice and was sure Sion could hear it too. His hand dropped from Sion's face. His heart beating hard against his chest, Nezumi merely laid there under Sion's trapping gaze and looked back into his companions eyes.
"I can't help it."
Sion barely whispered but Nezumi heard him all the same and that newborn thing inside his stomach twisted wildly at how his voice trembled. Sion closed in another inch, placing his hands on his chest and still staring into Nezumi's gray eyes with a numinous fire in his.
"Stop me… if you don't want this."
He said, his voice still a whisper as he closed in another inch between them. His breath brushed against Nezumi's lips.
Their lips were almost touching, and Sion was still staring at Nezumi through half-closed eyelids.
"… I can't."
And then Sion's lips closed around Nezumi's. Nezumi watched him close his eyes. Sion's long, white eyelashes dropped tiny shadows over his cheekbones. His hands on his chest tugged at Nezumi's shirt. An inferno was set loose inside him. Nezumi tried with all his might to fight it… to resist before it devoured him whole.
It was too hot. Sion's lips felt like velvet fire, his slow pace only reminded him of the flickering of flames. His heart burned… it burned in his chest and Nezumi lost all sense of direction. Sion's hands made their way up his neck and into his hair on either side of his head under the ears. His fingers dug into his scalp, and it was madness and euphoria and Nezumi fell into the inferno.
Grasping his face with both hands, Nezumi responded to his kiss. And it wasn't tender and it wasn't gentle. It was starvation… invert suffocation. As if he could only breathe through his lips, as if air only existed in his lungs. Urging his lips apart he claimed dominance over his mouth, his tongue, his lips. A muffled moan vibrated through Sion's throat and Nezumi felt it resound over his own tongue. He pushed forward, switched angles, pulled him closer but didn't let him go.
A hand slid inside his shirt and long fingers scratched Sion's back. Nezumi hungrily relished the sound Sion made at that and allowed him only a single breath's time to pull his lips away. He raised himself on his elbows and pushed Sion back, with both his hands and his mouth. Sion gasped when his head hit the pillows and once more when Nezumi's hands cupped his face one more time, his lips closing over his.
Nezumi felt like a black hole. He could absorb all of Sion and the entirety of his luminous celestial body and still crave for more. He had never been so close to him, so close that he could feel every bone in his body and yet he was nowhere near as close as he needed to be. His flushed face, the smell of his slowly sweating neck, the sleek texture of his snowy hair, the unrestrained sound of his panting and the slightly sweet taste of his tongue… it was all very new and yet it all felt strangely familiar. He knew he couldn't stop anymore. Sion had gotten too close to him… gotten too close to a black hole.
Sion whispered when Nezumi pulled away to catch his breath. He saw millions of questions sparkling in his crimson eyes. It was like watching fireworks during sunset. Nezumi silenced him with a finger over his lips. He gazed down into his blazing eyes and his whole body protested at the delay and when he spoke, he heard an unfamiliar sincerity in his voice.
"Don't. Just for once, don't ask questions."
Sion's eyes seemed to drown the curiosity as yearning took its place. He pulled Nezumi down onto him by the neck and Nezumi closed the space between their lips, without breaking the gaze.
"Just let it be," he whispered against his mouth diving head-first into the hellfire.
And then he leaned in to ban him from every sound which had more than two syllables for the rest of the night with only exception of his name...
This was his end… his downfall. His one Achilles' heel.
And it was worth dying for.
I have a very special friend, Autumn (.net/u/1243273/AkisWonderland) to thank for this for the incredible motivation she has given me. She makes me feel like royalty and she knows what that means ^_^
No.6, Nezumi and Sion belong to Asano, Atsuko. Although I would love to own them, unfortunately I don't.