Ask: Kingdom Hearts Style!

Chapter 1: Return of the fallen fic.

Almost complete darkness dominates the vast, chair-filled room, seeming to seep into every corner... dark figures shuffle and shift about, making a quiet rustling sound like a large flock of birds... Unintelligable whispers are heard here and there, when all of a sudden a single figure appears on the vast stage stretching out before the many seats...

"Ahem..." The figure clears it's throat, and all of a sudden the lights flash on, a catchy theme song playing as the crowd applauds the now-bowing figure. Straightening up, the redhead grins at the people in the studio audience.

/Well now, this was a better turnout than even I expected... Captain will be really happy./ She thought, and winked at the hidden camera placed in the wall behind her. Turning back to the audience, she raises her hands, gradually calming the audience down enough to be heard.

"Hellooooo, ladies and Dusks! Welcome to Ask: Kingdom Hearts Style Returns!" She calls out to the audience, and quickly continues before another round of applause can drown her out. "It's so good to see everyone here, and first off, me and Captain Isa Von Pickles would just like to say thank you so much for coming out here today! Now, given that our last attempt at this sort of thing was removed from the site because of multiple complaints due to violations-" Here she rolled her eyes dramatically, for emphasis. "-of the Rules and Regulations of Fanfiction, Captain Isa Von Pickles disappeared for quite a while because of real life situations that demanded her attention, and also because of her bruised confidence in her own writing abilities. Without her there really wasn't much point in continuing, so as many of you may know, we haven't really shown our faces around these parts much. However, me and Captain have been talking recently, girl-to-Nobody, and we've decided to give it another shot! And so, as the end of 2011 is nearing, we're back stronger than ever with a cast of (mostly) enthusiastic Nobodies and Key-Bearers, and a whole new layout!" She grinned. "And DAMN, is it good to be back!"

"Couldn't have said it better myself, Charlex..." A voice said, and out of a Corridor of Darkness stepped a certain emo-haired Nobody, clutching a large leather-bound tome in his hands. Nodding politely at the audience in response to the catcalls and cheers that accompanied his arrival, he turned back to his coworker.
"Hello Zexion!" Charlex greeted cheerfully, before looking around in confusion. "Where in Kingdom Hearts is Axel?" She paused, rolling her eyes again as quite a few females started screaming in glee at the mention of the redheaded man. "He was supposed to help me out with the disclaimer..."
"Alright, alright, keep your boots on!" Said yet another familiar voice, and with a swirl of darkness Number VII was standing beside her.

"WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?" Charlex yelled to him, over the sound of the renewed screaming of fangirls.
"XEMNAS SET ME UP WITH A MISSION TO DESTROY A COUPLE OF TAILBUNKER HEARTLESS!" He yelled back. "Yeouch, those things and Fire Magic do not mix..." Charlex said with a wince, as the noise finally died down to a bearable level.
"Yeah, tell me about it... I think he's still pissed off from that time we let Cerberus loose in the Round Room during a meeting."

"Ahh, memories..." They said in unison, both getting a dreamy look on their face. Rolling his eyes, Zexion turned back to the camera and the crowd.

"We are accepting any questions you may have for the Organization, the Key-Bearers, and pretty much every other character mentioned in the Kingdom Hearts series..." He said, and Charlex quickly snapped out of her memory-induced stupor, turning back to the camera with a grin. "We are also accepting requests for any pranks or dares, on your victim- oh, uh, I mean, your person of choice. Within reason, of course... In the case of somebody wanting to prank Demyx, our official cameraman," She motioned to the mull-hawk'd Nobody mostly hidden behind the huge camera, and paused to wait for the slightly less enthusiastic cheer to die down. "- either Axel or Xigbar will take over as temporary cameraman. Probably Xigbar, cause he can get much better angles, and he's not as likely to blow the damn camera up..." After turning to shoot Axel (who was now whistling innocently, looking everywhere but at the annoyed redheaded girl in front of him) a glare, she paused to think for a moment before letting out an 'oh!' sound.

"Oh yeah, and I almost forgot - you can put in a request for a prank on anybody but me, as I am the host of the show. You can, however, give me a dare if you care enough to. I know how many of you feel about the 'unofficial' Organization members." Once again, she rolled her eyes. While she was distracted, Axel leaned towards the camera and whispered, "You /can/ in fact request a prank on her, she's just trying to save her own ass..."
"I heard that..." Charlex growled, and glared at Axel once more. "For that, I'm not going to let you do the disclaimer... Demyx?"

Stepping out from his place behind the camera, Demyx stuck his head into the view range of the lens as he pulled an index card out from his pocket and read, "Neither Captain Isa Von Pickles, the producer of our show, nor our host Charlex owns me, Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, nor anything to do with the afor-mentioned thinga-ma-bobbers... They all belong to Disney and Square Enix, and all profits made from the show are going to the Get a Heart Foundation, a charitable organization that, well, OUR Organization has created to benefit Nobodies all across the universe."

"Thank you, Demyx!" Charlex said, and turned to the camera. "And now folks, it's time for you to send in reviews with any questions, prank ideas, dares, or requests you may have for us, or the rest of the Kingdom Hearts cast. See you next time, on Ask: Kingdom Hearts Style Returns! Goodnight, everybody!"

A/N: Yes folks, I have returned. ^_^ It's good to be back on FF, after having taken quite a bit of time off. Please review, because every time we get a review, the sponsers of the Get a Heart Foundation send in a dollar to bring us closer to our goal. *drags Demyx over, and has him do the puppy dog eyes* C'mon, you know you can't resist this... and if you can, Axel will give you a cookie of your choice for every review you send in. ;)
Axel: *splutters* HEY, I did not sign up for cookie duty!
Capt. Pickles: C'mon Axel, it's for the reviewers! D:
Axel: *sigh* Alright, alright... *mumbles* The things I do for these people...