A/N: So it's Thanksgiving and this just sort of came to me. It's extremely awkward for me to write and publish, but I can't help it. It was also too amusing for me. I rated it M just in case. For paranoia purposes. It's also to sort of to make up for not updating in awhile. ^.^'
Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note!
Warnings: Extreme awkwardsness, some, um, dirty references, pervy Matsuda, and sexy L. The man deserves a warning of his own.
It was Thanksgiving Day and the Kira search team was still at the HQ. L decided that they should have it here, after the workers spent a little time with family at home. They all assembled around 6 o'clock for supper, none having the heart to skip out on L, who had probably never celebrated any holiday with anyone beside Watari. They were all gathered down in the waiting area on the first floor, where they usually worked. L and Light took it upon themselves to make the dinner. Well, Light was going to make it and L wanted to try and help.
While waiting, Matsuda excused himself to use the restroom. As the young cop walked by the kitchen area, he overheard an… interesting conversation. Matsuda recognized L and Light's voices and crept over to the door, pushing his ear against it to hear better.
"Just spread open the legs so I can stuff it in, Ryuuzaki!"
"But Light-kun, I don't think it can fit! The holes too small…"
"Don't worry Ryuuzaki, its perfect. You did a good job, now hold still so I can get it in!"
"Wow! I can't believe you got all that in!"
Matsuda froze, was he hearing what he thought he was hearing? Oh God, were they…? Now was the time he probably should've turned and left, but Matsuda stood frozen and quickly pressed harder to the door when he heard them speaking again.
"…Light-kun," Matsuda heard L's voice say timidly, "how long must I wait after you put it in?"
Sigh, "Not long Ryuuzaki, just make sure it doesn't explode in there, I'm going to get the whip cream."
"Whip cream? I do love whip cream…" Matsuda felt his face heat up; he prayed the rest of the team wouldn't come up. This would be quite embarrassing for everyone. There were some shuffling noises and a few things opening and closing in the background.
"Hear, have this while we wait for it get hot and rise, kay?" Light's voice was loud and clear from the other side of the door.
"Mmm! Light-kun is most excellent at this."
"Thanks Ryuuzaki, the guy who works on the street corner gave me instructions."
"He did? He might have to teach me his secrets, this is incredible!"
Guy on the corner? Did Light's father know about this? Obviously not, Light would've been sent to military school probably. He sucked in a breath, when he heard L's distinctive voice moan.
"The juice is very tasty," Matsuda desperately wanted to leave, yet he couldn't help but want to find out what would happen next.
"Hurry up Ryuuzaki! It's nearly done!"
"Light-kun, do not rush me. I'm enjoying this!"
"Damnit! Just come already, Ryuuzaki!"
Matsuda heard Light groan and L yelp, "You're so forceful, Light-kun! That hurt!"
"It's not my fault! Now hurry up! Those thighs look amazing."
"You're drooling Light-kun," Matsuda heard L point out.
Matsuda felt so dirty standing hear listening and finally he couldn't take it. He slammed the door open, "Seriously guys?" Matsuda shouted.
"…What?" Matsuda looked around and there was L and Light. Fully dressed. Light holding a turkey and L holding a pumpkin pie with whip cream on top.
"Matsuda, are you ok? You look kind of flustered," Light stepped forward looking concerned.
Matsuda blinked, looking confused, "Wait, I thought I heard…"
"Heard what?" L questioned in his monotone voice.
"I thought…I thought I heard you and Light having…sex in the kitchen," Matsuda felt his ears grow hot and watched as Light's and L's faces turn the same tomato red.
"Um, we were making a turkey and pie…" talk about awkward. Light shifted his footing, "And if you thought that…why did you wait outside listening so long?"
Matsuda was at a loss for words. He stared with his jaw dropped and cheeks flaming red.
"Yes, Matsuda, why were you listening for so long?" L asked, stepping forward with an eyebrow raised and slight grin.
"I, um, I, please don't tell anyone!" Matsuda felt tears prick in the corner of his eyes.
"Don't worry, it'll be our secret," Light smiled sweetly, "Now go downstairs. Me and L will finish cooking and meet you down there, ok?"
Matsuda smiled brightly and hugged the genii and thanked them fervently before running down the stairs to the others.
After Matsuda left, Light turned to L, "Good thing you heard him walk by, L."
The older man grinned, "You're welcome, Light-kun. Now about the whip cream…"
Light smiled picking up on what the other was saying, "Oh, yes, let's continue from where we left off, shall we?"
L smiled and locked the kitchen door grabbing the whip cream, "We shall," he said before pulling the burnet to him and kissing him forcefully on the lips.
A/N: So, um, how was it? Please review and leave comments!