Title: Why?
Author Starrylizard
Characters: Sam and Castiel
Prompt(s): Speak
Rating: Gen, PG, 335 words
Summary: a short coda to episode 5.2


Sam settled into the motel mattress, feet still on the floor from where he'd sat and then just flopped back on the bed with a sigh of exhaustion. A full day of hitch hiking and walking, worry and sadness, and it all seemed too much and not enough. He was going to get straightened out, prove himself safe and reliable again and maybe one day he could go back to hunting. Someday soon maybe he could rejoin the fight, but not now.

His thoughts were yanked back to the cheap décor of the room, with its lumpy mattress and orange curtains, by the sound of his cell phone and its steady vibration. He slipped it from his pocket and flicked it on.

"Yeah?" he answered.

"Sam." The voice was dry, emotionless and incredibly deep. Castiel.

"Cas."

"Where are you? I need to speak to Dean."

"Dean and I… He's not here, Cas."

"I will wait for him, then."

"No, we've- I've taken myself out of the hunt for the moment. You'll have to call Dean direct, or Bobby. I don't know where he is."

"I see." Castiel's tone of voice stayed much the same, but Sam swore there was disapproval in it suddenly.

"What?"

"You do not think this course of action- unwise?"

"Maybe, but it's necessary. -Hey Cas?"

"Yes?"

"If you find God… When you find God, would you ask him for me… Would you ask him why?"

"Why?"

"Why he saved me? He had to save Dean, I get why he saved Dean, but why me? Was I just collateral, incidental- Why would he save me, Cas?" Sam heard his voice crack, as a lump seemed to form in his throat.

"I do not know. I promise I will ask."

"Thank you."

"Goodbye."

The line went dead and Sam took a deep breath. His eyes unconsciously traced the water stains on the ceiling above him. His thoughts were of beings from above and below and questions he had no way of answering.

He hoped Dean was okay.