Okay, I would like to make it clear that I'm not racist, the jokes here do not reflect my beliefs, and that this entire little ficlet is just a drawn out joke. Okay? We cool bro? Aiight.


It started with Cartman. It always starts with Cartman. "Hey guys!" he crowed as he sat down, looking up and down the 'guy's table' at lunch. "Why do black men cry during sex?"

Everyone was silent for a moment. "W-well I don't know, E-Eric... Why?"

"The mace."

The table exploded with surprised laughter. Kyle parted his lips to lecture but Kenny quickly interrupted, "What's long and black and smells like shit? ... The welfare line."

"I've got one!" Clyde exclaimed excitedly, "What can a bench and a large pizza do that a black man can't? ... Feed and support a family of four!" Kyle sat back, arms crossed with a disapproving scowl, but everyone else was hysterical. "Timmah!"

"G-Gah! W-w-what are the, the, ack! Worst three years of a bl-black man's life? First grade!" Tweek forced out, saying the punchline too quickly, cheeks red from the concentration. Craig smirked and murmured just loud enough to be heard, "What's the difference between a black man and a snow tire? The snow tire doesn't start singing when you put chains on it."

"Well jeez f-f-fellas. How do you stop a black man from drowning? ... You d-d-d-don't!" Jimmy chimed in.

"How do you make a black man cry?" Damien asked the group lightly, a perverse smile on his thin black lips. "... Kill his family."

The silence only lasted a moment before Stan broke it with, "Why do white people go to black people's garage sales? To get their stuff back!"

Bradley grinned. "What's the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? ... The bucket."

Shyly, without looking up, Pip called to the group, "How does a black woman fight crime? ... She gets an abortion." and a moment later Butters responded with, "What's the n-word you never want to call a black man?"

The table stared at him in horror, terrified he was about to take this one step too far.


The table exploded with laughter once more, drawing annoyed glares from the other tables. Everyone was in hysterics... Except for Kyle. Kevin stood and mock glared at the group. "Hey, watch it! I've got black men and women in my tree... In fact, I think they're still hanging there."

The group fell quiet as their laughter died, trying to think of more jokes. After a moment, Kyle suddenly doubled over on himself, shoulders trembling with laughter. The table watched curiously as he gasped for breath between loud belly laughs, taking several deep breaths to calm himself before choking out, "What do you tell a black Jew?"

It was Cartman who took the bait. "What?"

"'Back of the oven!'"

The group collapsed into heaving laughter, only to be halted by a cold voice from just behind the redhead.

"You know why there aren't many white jokes?" Token Black bit out in a frosty tone, sweeping his eyes over the group. No one responded, so he pushed on as though they were dying to hear the answer-"Being white is bad enough."

QUESTIONS, COMMENTS, CONCERNS? REVIEW!-Oh, and I almost forgot-go R&R Obsession as well, kthnx.