Disclaimer: I do not own Claymore

Warning: Contains very OOCness, randomness and Tabitha and Helen name-calling.

Omake 3: Apple Intervention!

The room was filled with chatter from both Awakened Beings and warriors sat around a long table used for meetings. Helen stood at the head of the table sporting a pair of glasses

Helen: "ORDER!" *slams hand on table* "Good! We're all here!"

Yuma: "Umm why are we here?"

Helen: "You don't know?!"

Riful: "You dragged us here you dumb Claymore"

Helen: "Well this is an apple intervention!"

Cynthia: "... A what?"

Helen: "Apple intervention!"

Isley: "And we are here because?"

Helen: "To discuss the lack of apples in this world!

Deneve: *mutters* "Here we go again"

Clare: "Helen this is stupid. No one cares about apples"


Riful: "No, but you are"

Helen: "HEY!"

Cynthia: "Umm can we leave?"

Helen: "NO!" *boards up the door and windows* "NO ONE IS LEAVING UNTIL WE FINISH THIS INTERVENTION!"


Helen: "Good! Now as some of you may have noticed there has been a recent lack of apples"

Tabitha: *mutters* "Only you would notice Rubber Arms"

Helen: "So this meeting today is about what to do!"

Riful: "And we care because...?

Helen: "If we don't do anything all the apples might disappear!"

Clare: "Is there a problem with that?"

Helen: "YES! If all the apples disappear then I can't eat any! PLUS, if apple trees disappear, then the bugs living in them will have to move and go to other trees then the other bugs will move and soon a chain reaction will start and bugs will be EVERWHERE! Then they'll eat the corpses that the Awakened Beings eat and the Awakened Beings will have to go hunt more which means more people dying which means more Claymores to fight which means more Claymores dying and Awakening which means new Claymores and the same thing! Then everyone will die because all the humans will be eaten by the Awakened Ones and the Claymores will Awaken and fight to the death and that means the end of the world!"


Deneve: *face-palm*

Dauf: "Duhh... Ohkay! Ima hep you wittle Cwaymore! Haha, dunt wan da word to end"

Isley: *smiles brightly so he looks like Tadase* "Alright I'll help"

Riful: "Ah what the heck. Sounds fun! Can I awaken you too?"

Clare: "Can I leave now?"

Tabitha: "Rubber Arms you're a dumbass"

Cynthia: *fallen asleep*

Yuma: "Ummm..."

Helen: "What was that Miria-obsesser?!"

Tabitha: "You wanna say that to my face Ms. Elastic?!"

Yuma: "Ummmmmmmmm..."

Helen: "Oh bring it you lost puppy!"

Tabitha: "Oh I will Mrs. Apple!"

Yuma: "UMMM!"

Helen/Tabitha: "WHAT YUMA?!"

Yuma: "Where's Captain?"

Helen/Tabitha: "..."

Several miles away

Miria: "Achoo!" *eating an apple in cavern all alone* "Where is everyone?"


Omake Chapter 3!

Topic was requested by Tmj1395! A present for you my friend! (Though very VERY late)

An invisible chocolate-chip cookie to anyone that understood the Tadase joke used on Isley! Shugo Chara reference :D

I did not create the Rubber Arms nickname! I read it in a fanfiction; I believe Danylefou deserves the credit, if I am wrong someone correct me!

Feel free to request any topics/themes!

Review Please!