A/N: Okay... So this week's episode was one of the single most depressing things ever. But it raised a very important question: IS ELYAN THE SINGLE MOST RUBBISH BROTHER EVER OR WHAT? Read on to find out ;) Also, this is crack, in case you hadn't guessed. I'm attempting to cheer myself up after the misery!

It was first light and Arthur was watching Elyan watching Merlin watching Gwen go.

Why wasn't he doing something?

Perhaps I should clarify who is thinking that about whom.

Arthur, for once, was not second-guessing Merlin. Not that Merlin was able to appreciate this, as neither he nor Gwen had the first clue they had acquired an audience. Arthur was actually wondering just why it was that Elyan, a knight, one of a supposedly noble breed, was abandoning his sister, the last of his family, when she needed him most.

He decided to voice his thoughts on the subject.



"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"That's alright, I just didn't realise you were behind me. How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough. Why aren't you going to her?"


"I just want to know, you're her brother."

"Oh, come on Arthur. This isn't new."


"Don't you remember when you decided to drag Camelot off to war; I told you that I'd be willing to die for you? You'd only just told my sister she was 'inappropriate' for you, do you think I didn't know that? I just picked a side. I'm doing the same thing now."

Arthur still seemed confused, so Elyan decided to put it into simpler terms for him. "Bros before hoes, mate."

Arthur considered this, watched Gwen disappear out of the gate, and then clapped Elyan on the back. "Now that's loyalty. You're my new favourite knight."