Author's Note: I have never written a Darkwing Duck story before. This is just a one shot. Mainly I wrote it because I have season 1 on DVD and my son, who is about the age I was when I first saw it (2), loves it and runs around screaming "Darkwing Duck!" at the top of his lungs. When Darkwing is out of his costume, I refer to him as Drake. Just a one shot. Thank you for your time.
"Feeling sluggish? Weight of the world got you down? Then you might try – Destruction at the Hands of the Liquidator!" The villainous Liquidator turned his arm into the shape of a hammer. Even if it was just made out of water, Darkwing felt the sting when it hit him in the face.
And that was when his cell phone went off. He went flying backward, and ignored the cell phone; instead, choosing to charge back at the Liquidator.
"Maybe you oughta answer it, D.W.," Launchpad suggested, taking a swing at Bushroot. The half-plant, half-duck hybrid ducked the punch and tripped Darkwing's sidekick over a root.
"I am a little busy right now," Darkwing pointed out, pushing his sleeves up before attempting to land a punch on the villain. His cell phone continued to ring. Finally, he gave in an answered it. "This had better be good, I am in the midst of melee with two mischievous miscreants!"
"Darkwing!" Gosalyn, Darkwing's now twenty year old daughter, was on the other line. At least she had the sense to use my super hero name, even over the phone, Darkwing thought appreciatively. "You've gotta come home as soon as you're done. Something's happened."
"Happened? What's wrong? Gos, are you all right?" The superhero was starting to panic now. In his mind, he imagined hundreds of different ways Gosalyn could be in peril right now.
"I'm fine. Just finish your fight and come on home. I let myself in. By the way, you really need to remember that those Hide-a-Key rocks only work if there's more than one rock in the yard."
Darkwing muttered a goodbye before hanging up.
"Now where were we?" He asked darkly to the two villains. "Oh, that's right..." he pulled his gas gun out of some hidden pocket in his cape. "Let's get dangerous!" he shot first at the Liquidator. The water dog was immediately frozen into a block of ice. "You know, if we had a table and a buffet, he'd make a great centerpiece," Darkwing commented in Launchpad's direction.
"I'm all for spreads, but I could use a little help here...at this rate, I'll be a part of the salad bar!" Sure enough, Bushroot was controlling vines to crawl up and immobilize the pilot. Launchpad fell over as the vines reached up to his arms.
"Get frozen, Bushroot," Darkwing fired his gun on the second villain.
"Ouch! That's c-c-c-cold..." Bushroot complained. He wasn't completely frozen, but he was clearly uncomfortable. The cops chose that moment to arrive.
"Thanks, Darwking," the first officer said as he grabbed a hold of Bushroot and forced him into the cop car. "We'll arrange an ice cream truck to pick up the Liquidator."
"Just another day for Darkwing Duck!" Darkwing cried triumphantly. "C'mon, L.P. Gos is waiting for as at the house. Apparently she has some important news for us."
"Engaged?" Drake Mallard repeated again after he'd been successfully revived. When Gosalyn had first made her announcement, he'd jumped so high he'd hit his head on the ceiling. "You can't be getting married. You are too young, and I forbid it!"
"Dark!" Morgana warned. She and Drake had gotten married themselves just a few years ago, and she'd taken over the role of mother to Gosalyn very well. Now, like usual, she was the one trying to keep Drake reasonable. "She's over eighteen. It's her decision." She kissed his forehead and moved the ice pack.
"Yeah, dad," Gosalyn rolled her eyes. "You can't forbid me from doing anything. I don't live with you anymore. I am an adult, ya know!"
"An adult who was still living with me until just a few months ago!"
"So I crashed here while going to college! What's the big deal? You helped pay my tuition, it saved you money in the long run."
"I think it's great, Gos," Launchpad interjected. "So, who's the lucky fella?"
"That's right!" Drake said triumphantly. "We don't even know who he is, so you can't have known him that long! Which means you shouldn't marry him."
"As brilliant detective work as that is, Dad, you do know him. And we've been dating for years."
"Then why is this the first I'm hearing of it!"
"Because you said," Gosalyn did the best imitation of her dad as she could, deepening her voice and crossing her arms, "'Gosalyn, you are not allowed to date until you pay your own bills and live on your own! Boys are bad news and will distract you, and your grades don't need to dip any lower or you will be living with me forever!'"
"How do you remember all that?"
"It was one of our weekly chats. Along with 'clean your room' and 'stop using the gas gun on bullies at school'."
"So," Drake reclined back into his chair and supported the ice pack on his head with his hand, feeling a severe headache starting to rise. "If you've been dating this long, does that mean you've been sneaking him into the house?"
Gosalyn laughed. "Sneaking? Why would I have to sneak Honker into the house?"
"Honker?" Drake repeated. "Honker...you're dating Honker?" Gosalyn nodded. "And you're going to marry Honker. Honker, super geeky, smart kid? The one you spent most of Elementary school protecting from bullies?" He felt himself relax. He actually liked Honker fairly well, and knew he would treat Gosalyn well.
"How did he ask you?" Morgana asked, wanting to focus on the more romantic aspects now that she sensed that Drake was starting to calm down about the situation.
"Well, he never came right out and said it. He had a ring with him that he kept fumbling with, so I finally just took it from him and told him yes, I would. We were thinking we'd do the ceremony in June."
"Wow. Who woulda thought...Gosalyn getting married, and to the kid next door!" Launchpad said, nodding his approval. "We're all really happy for you. Both of you. You can tell Honker we said that when you see him next."
"I'm actually headed over to the Muddlefoots' now to go help him tell his parents...and Tank, not that he'll care."
"Have fun, Gos!" Launchpad waved as she left. He and Morgana both watched Drake for a reaction. He merely sat there, before handing Morgana his ice pack.
"Morg, I'm going to need that refilled and an industrial sized bottle of aspirin," before she could ask why, he started banging his head against the door frame. Launchpad watched him in bewilderment as Morgana pulled him back.
"I just realized something..."
"What is it, D.W.?" Launchpad asked, "You still upset Gos is getting married?"
"No. I'm happy for her. Really. Honker's a nice kid. He'll be good to her, and for her. But I just realized something." Launchpad and Morgana both waited for Drake to finish his sentence. "She's marrying Honker. She's going to be Mrs. Honker Muddlefoot."
"I'm not following you," Morgana said blankly.
Drake sighed and hit his head against the doorframe again. "It means...I am going to be, however distantly, related to the Muddlefoots."