Summary: Written for the kink meme. The prompt was Light/L in the True Elision universe. For those who haven't read that awesome fanfic, basically, Light and L are both dead and they are in Mu together. The fanfic was never finished and the prompt was for some smexy time. I couldn't resist filling it because True Elision is my favorite story in this fandom.
I was awfully reluctant about posting this here, for a variety of reasons and I feel that it's kind of bad taste, but to hell with it!
Disclaimer: Don't own Death Note, and I didn't even come up with the setting of this story - as I said, it's a continuation of another, unfinished story, see above!
Time meant nothing in Mu. Time was as twisted and disturbed as everything else in the afterlife.
Mu was a place where memories and illusions of the past flashed in broad daylight, succeeding to shock only newcomers, buildings and objects long destroyed stood like solid ghosts alongside the crowded never-ending streets. Thousands of souls treaded the dusty roads in search of their true soulmate, the one who would complete their existence so that they could disappear to a better place. So far that search had been unsuccessful for Light, who searched for his only hope – Misa. He had walked through many different settlements that represented different periods of human history. Every once in a while, when feeling opportunistic enough, he had also explored pass the outskirts of the ghost cities, where even weirder structures and sceneries were revealed.
The world seemed to change as one passed from one section to another making Mu reminiscent to an enormous history museum. However, whatever period or place Light passed through there was always that dreary bleak atmosphere of a barren lands from the past. It was all just a memory, mere ruins, skeletons of times long lost – dusty, gray and dry places, with no beginning or end, no limit, no hope. The sky remained permanently grey although it sometimes became darker, and sometimes harsh cold rain poured and storms cast misery on the desperate inhabitants of that world.
And time seemed to stretch forever and at the same time pass really quickly. So it didn't surprise that Light couldn't tell how long it had been since he met L and the two of them continued their depressing search together. Light was beginning to lose hope even though he knew that Misa had to be searching for him somewhere out there as well. The former Kira couldn't imagine that after his demise the blond could have found another person to love. He couldn't even allow himself to think about these things, because the prospect of being stuck forever in Mu was more than any soul could bare.
At least L was worse off than him. Long ago (or maybe not that long ago) they had run across a look-alike who had told the former detective that Whammy, the old man, who seemed to be L's only hope of getting out of that wretched realm, had long ago rejoined his wife and was not looking for his young comrade.
Back then L hadn't shown much emotion, but Light had noticed that with each passing day the detective looked even more hopeless and resigned. The brunette often found himself wondering what would happen to Ryuuzaki once Light found Misa. He knew he'd disappear and continue eternity with her at his side, somewhere (hopefully) far away from the physical suffering and desperation he felt in Mu. But what of L? It seemed that the man was doomed to be eternally alone, unable to utter a single word to the crowds of strangers. Here and there the duo had seen the remains of those poor souls, who had failed to find a companion. It gave Light the shivers just thinking about them.
Despite the old rivalry, strangely enough, most probably because of the significant time he had spent with Ryuuzaki in Mu, and not to forget the time from their lifetimes, Light didn't like the idea of this fate befalling his companion.
And sometimes, in the darkest moments of his waking torture, Light wondered what would happen if he also failed to find Misa. Was he going to go insane and would the desperation twist and torture him to the point of becoming one of those… creatures… alongside Ryuuzaki? Perhaps their companionship was going to slow the process, for they could still converse, even though they had nothing to say… or perhaps they had too much to say. It was the type of talk, which endangered their fragile balance, the type of worlds that had the power to pierce through each other's hearts and make them do something as rash and stupid as leaving each other.
Time meant nothing, but Light knew that enough time had passed that he couldn't allow L to go anymore. Being around someone, especially someone who could engage you and mentally stimulate you, offer a good vent with a casual fight, and even comfort just with his quiet presence – it was something Light couldn't resign after the prolonged isolation he had endured after his death.
And he knew that it went both ways – L couldn't leave him. Light had gone through the fright that the black-haired man had disappeared a few times and the frantic horror which he had felt could only be compared to the emotion he had seen in Ryuuzaki's eyes the few times, when he had thought that the tall brunette had abandoned him.
They had grown depended on each other - without each other they couldn't even bath – the water turned into thousands of insects every time Light reached for it. Only when Ryuuzaki sprawled it on him, washed his face, spilled it over his naked shoulders, only them could the former Kira feel the sense of the most basic relief. The same went for Ryuuzaki, who claimed thousands of mouse-traps snapped on his skin every time he touched water by himself.
Yes, Mu was full of this kind of clever tricks to terrorize the lonely soul. So they tolerated each other and stayed together. And they never spoke of those fears… that desperation, that loneliness. And in the back of Light's mind there was always a weird sense of unfulfillment – every time he looked around, every time he thought of his short life, of Ryuuzaki… He had defeated him in life, he had been victorious, so why did he always feel as if he had missed something really important?
That night the darkness found them on the road through the uncultivated part of Mu. Hundreds of pedestrians strode alongside them in the search for a new settlement. Light silently broke away from the crowd and descended from the stone-covered road to the side, not even glancing to check if L had followed. He would be there, the brunette knew.
Around them the scenery was barren, further away there were the shadows of mountains and hills, covered in dry forests with dead trees and occasional villas and random structures. Light watched curiously the remains of a crashed airplane protruding from the ground on the side of the road as if sinking into a sea of dirt. Such visions were not surprising at all – every here and then he'd see some even more absurd remains just sticking out of nowhere.
The duo made their way towards the countryside, as was their routine for the night, searching for a suitable resting place. Anything was going to do, as long as it provided shelter, mostly from the cold downpour that was due almost every night, but also from the other inhabitants of Mu. Unfortunately, the streets of Mu were unpoliced in any way and filled with all sorts, some less stable than others. Both Light and L had experienced a few very unpleasant surprises of waking up to a creeping hand trying to mug them and do other things… Together they had fought every intruder off, but it was still unpleasant to deal with the panic, the adrenaline, and the shock. So now they made sure to search for more hidden places to sleep, or took wakeful shifts when they couldn't find a secure shelter.
The dusk became denser and soon enough the sky began cracking ominously. Despite the regular rain, storms were very rare, and whenever they happened, they brought out the worse of tempest's fury, crimson lightnings cracked the sky and hale unleashed upon the dead earth.
"We better hurry," L suggested and the two made an effort to move quicker as the first drops of cold rain began falling, hitting their exposed faces and drenching their wretched clothing.
The wind steadfastly grew violent and Light turned around to see if he still had the former detective close to him. The black-haired man was struggling with the wind, his loose ragged top was flying everywhere around his thin frame and his longish locks were lashing at his face, carried by the wild wind. It looked as if the wind was going to blow him off his feet. The first lightnings illuminated their vision and Light saw the effort on Ryuuzaki's face as he tried to catch up. The brunette considered what his instinct was telling him to do and finally decided to give into the urge and he went back, clasped L's hand and dragged him forward.
Light turned around too quickly to see his former enemy's reaction. However he felt relief when the drenched cold fingers tighten around his in response.
They were trying to reach the hills and the forests, hoping that they would provide some sort of shelter but there was no hope to manage before the storm unleashed it's full fury. Light could barely see through the rain, he held his arm over his face, trying to shelter his eyes as much as possible and shivered from the intense cold. Soon enough the hale was going to punish them with icy-chunks, and Light was beginning to wonder if a dent in the cracked earth was going to be their bed for the night. Surely if they just interwined their suffering limbs, they would at least partially protect each other from the downpour.
Just when he was beginning to lose hope and surrender to that idea, Light saw some sort of structure through the rain curtain. He stopped so abruptly that L collided into his back almost knocking him over.
"Sorry," the man said breathlessly.
Light didn't wait for the answer in stead began dragging L in the direction of the house. They both avoided going into structures, because of the terrifying apparitions and the way some dreams and illusions of the visitors materialized and played out in such places. The former detective in particular hated going inside buildings. However it seemed reasonable to go into one when they didn't have any other protection from the storm.
L spotted the house but didn't protest.
As soon as they arrived at the door they made out it must have been an inn. Now it looked like a dark, abandoned, possibly haunted house (which it was). Light tried to open the rusty door and L joined in helping him break through the door. They tumbled inside and looked around.
Everything looked different all of a sudden. Inside the house no longer looked like an inn – it looked more like a dorm for a small private school.
"It can't be," L whispered next to Light's left ear, still catching his breath.
The brunette, dripping rain water and shivering looked through his drenched bangs at the former detective. L was hugging himself as if he was trying to warm up from the outside cold, but his gaze looked glazed as he observed the scenery with awe.
"You recognize this place?" Light asked softly.
L looked down to his feet and seemed miserable.
"Yes," he said after a pause.
L had changed quite a lot after he had endured his trial of the souls – he had become less able to mask his emotions, less able to control his reactions, much like what had happened to Light. It was ironic, but they had become much more honest.
"This is the place where I grew up," the black-haired man said quietly. Light's interest was immediately sparkled. He wanted to know a lot more about L's past. Perhaps he was going to find out?
The brunette glanced behind his back and noticed that the door didn't look as if it had ever been forced opened – it was closed and in fact it was a completely different door from before.
Inside the room everything looked almost intact, with the exception of the heavy feeling of a place where no one had lived in a long time. Outside the hail started and the ominous sounds of thousands of icy rocks hitting the building accompanied with the sharp lighting and thunder made the unlit scenery very creepy. It was probably straight out of L's own memory and had materialized as a hallucination for them both. Light knew that underneath it all was probably wrecked furniture and heavy cobwebs, destroyed windows and it was probably really cold, but he couldn't feel it.
The frailer man seemed frozen in his place, regarding the place with soft eyes, recalling numerous memories.
Light tried to imagine what he'd have felt like if this was a hallucination of his old home. A strong sense of nostalgia and regret washed over him. He sighed and looked at his companion with the closest thing to empathy that he could ever feel.
"Come," Light touched L's upper arm softly. The detective was startled out of his condition and locked eyes with the brunette questioningly.
Light avoided that stare. Honestly, he hadn't needed to touch the other man and he didn't know why he had done it. The former Kira walked forward. There was a staircase that lead to a second floor.
"Where should we stay?" he asked airily.
"I'd suggest we visit the kitchen first if I didn't know any better," L's voice was very quiet.
"You know it's a bad idea. Besides, I need a shower," Light said. "I'm sure there is one around here…"
"Yes, follow me," L lead the way to one of the rooms on the second floor. He tried to open the door but it was locked. He tried the next one and the one after, and finally there was one that opened.
L sighed heavily. Light watched him curiously as the man walked into the room without looking up until the last moment. There was something in that generally unreadable face…
"My old room, of course," L said so softly that Light almost couldn't hear him over the storm outside.
A lightning flashed and illuminated the neat little room, which had one bed, a desk and many bookshelves. There was also a cupboard and a little door that lead to what was the bathroom. The window was huge, but it had heavy curtains covering it. Light drew them apart to allow more light into the room. Outside the window there were bars, which made the room look strangely like a prison cell.
Light walked inside and L closed the door. The detective immediately made his way through the room to sit on the desk. His head was lowered and the brunette couldn't see his face.
"So, was this your family's house?" Light inquired even though he had already guessed that L had grown up in an orphanage.
"No," L said curtly. "This is Whammy's House, an orphanage for extremely gifted children."
"How old were you when you came here," Light asked quietly, moving to examine the books in the shelves. Sadly none of them had any writings on them – they were completely blank. Pity.
"I don't want to discuss any of this right now," L said quietly. "The bathroom is right there, if Light wants to take a warm shower."
"Do you think it's going to be warm?" Light said as he started walking towards the door.
L didn't reply. He looked very depressed, his dark hair was still dripping water to the floor, as was the rest of his body. He was shivering, probably from the cold, but the way he looked as he sat on that chair, like a normal person… His former enemy tried to ignore it but he felt unable to walk into that hot shower alone.
"Why don't you take one as well?" Light asked.
"I will," L said quietly, softly. "Right after Light-kun is finished."
"But you are drenched and you are freezing," Light argued. L actually lifted his head and looked at him curiously. "We have showered together before, you can just come in with me."
L stared at him for a prolonged minute. Light did not avert his hard eyes, allowing the former detective to scrutinize him as much as he needed to.
Finally L rose from his seat.
"Thank you for you offer, Light-kun. It is very kind of you," he said as he began to strip his drenched clothing on his way to the bathroom.
Light turned away and opened the door to the room. It was a bathroom alright. Light turned the knob and waited for the water to come out but in stead came only a wrenched wine of a waterless pipe system.
"No," Light hissed, refusing to believe it.
His only hope, his only comfort… He had really hoped for a shower, even a cold one would have done the trick. He so wanted out of his drenched soiled clothing!
"Well, if we hadn't found a house, we wouldn't have showered anyway, so either way…" L spoke behind him and when Light turned around to look at him, he discovered that the man had stripped completely and was now standing behind him with his bare skin clammy and dirty from the rain.
Light succeeded to keep his eyes above the pale shoulders even though his curiosity was killing him. He couldn't allow himself to be caught looking at L like that. As soon as the man turned around and walked out of the room though, it was another story. The brunette surveyed everything there was about that fragile, pale body, with the skin stretching tightly over angular bones. L looked so skinny, so unhealthy, and yet there was something alluring about him, because Light knew that this was L. And he was naked.
The brunette went into the other room after him. He looked around. Outside the storm was raging and his clothing felt so itchy and cold against his skin. It was probably going to be nice to discard it as the detective had done. However, for some reason Light felt somewhat nervous about it.
"At least we have the bed," Light said. "I'm certain that without the wet clothes we will dry and warm up under the sheets."
L gave him a look over his bony shoulder and went to the bed.
"It's a single bed, Light-kun," he said as he lifted the covers and pushed himself underneath them.
"I know, but it will be unfair if only one of us gets to sleep in it," Light protested as he stepped out of his pants, his jacket and top already discarded.
"I am not saying that we can't share," L mumbled from under the duvet, pushing himself to the wall as much as possible. "I just wanted to make sure that you are aware of that fact."
"Thanks for informing me of the obvious," Light teased and walked over.
His skin was soiled and wet, making him shiver even without the cold clothing. Outside the wind howled like a ghost around the chimneys of the house and something was opening and trashing back closed black-haired man lifted the covers with his hand and Light looked at the small space he was provided with. He was eager to hide under the covers but he was also dreading to get so intimately close to his former arch-enemy. Too close, Light thought when his shoulder brushed L's back for the first time.
There was not enough space and to avoid hanging outside the bed halfway through, Light pulled himself close to L's cold, damp frame.
L pushed himself as far to the wall as he could and his stiffness seemed to reduce his size, however, Light still didn't have a place to put his arms.
"I'm sorry," Light whispered as he snaked his arms around L, feeling a little shiver. Light's eyes widened at that reaction, even though he knew he shouldn't have been surprised – L had always rejected contact – it was probable that he had never been touched before.
Small trembles kept shaking the detective's body and Light wondered if it was really just the cold. But after about twenty minutes of tense silence and complete stillness their bodies had began to warm up, just a little. L had slowly relaxed in the brunette's arms and they were both breathing easily. Light's feet felt very cold and he yearned to tuck them underneath L's legs, but he knew better. A deep sigh made its way out of his throat and he bowed his head and exhaled under the covers against L's neck. There was a warming feeling for a brief moment in the space between them, and a second later L shivered quite noticeably.
One brunette eyebrow shot up but the man didn't say anything. L readjusted in his grasp with short, stiff motions. Light's arm was going numb under the detective, whose body generated little to none warmth, so he moved it underneath L's neck and wrapped it over one bony shoulder. It was such a protective and possessive position, the former Kira thought. And he was holding his ex-enemy this way. Mu had all these sick tricks to make a soul go insane…
"How are you feeling," Light said, trying to alleviate the awkwardness.
"I'm good," L mumbled into his arm.
After a minute of silence L shifted some more.
"What about you," he asked impassively.
"I'm alright as well. Thank you," Light said softly.
It was getting ridiculous. And Light's back was freezing from facing the room. He didn't want to be the first one to voice discomfort, but… to hell with it. It couldn't get any worse, could it now?
"Ryuuzaki," Light began tentatively.
"Huh," Ryuuzaki shot him a look over the shoulder. His inky eyes were so close, Light could make out the smallest reflections that danced in them – something the brunette's never knew was possible in L's eyes.
"Could we, perhaps, turn the other side," Light asked, hating himself.
"Certainly," L replied. Was it just Light or did those dark eyelashes lower on him?
Light's face was warming up. He wanted to deny it, but it was happening. He slowly turned to his other side and felt L do the same. The detective embraced him. It felt… incredibly weird. Cold, spidery arms came on either side of him, one tucking underneath his neck, the other over his chest. L's cold nose, followed by his cheekbone and then forehead relaxed against Light's spine between his shoulder blades. L was holding him. The man, who Kira had killed, abet indirectly, was now the only comfort he had in the awful afterlife. It was pathetic.
That stark black hair was tickling his neck and shoulders and Light fought to steady his breathing. It took several minutes for him to adjust. Finally when he was beginning to calm down something incredibly cold brushed against his foot, making him jump.
"I'm sorry," L whispered behind him, tightening his grip. "I'm really sorry…"
"Was that your foot?" Light asked, trying not to sound harsh.
"Yes, I'm sorry, it was an accident," the detective said tensely.
"No, it's ok," Light sighed. "Don't worry."
They slowly relaxed.
"Your feet are so cold," Light added as an afterthought. He extended his leg backwards, finding L's cold toes. The detective jumped a little as well. "Put them close to mine," Light invited generously.
Seriously, he had no idea why he was doing this. His former enemy hesitated.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, let's warm them up," Light said.
Once again they brushed their feet together and tentatively rubbed them together, trying to get the blood flowing. It could have been more effective if it was done with more vigor, but they were both reluctant to do any more than gentle shuffling against one another.
Light noticed L's fingers on his shoulder had began slowly stroking patterns against his skin in a comforting way. The brunette doubted that even the detective had noticed he was doing it.
Slowly Light began turning over. L let him go and froze.
"Do you want to…" he began asking but Light turned over and wrapped his arms around him in the same fashion as before.
"No, don't worry, let's just stay like this," Light said softly, lowering his eyelashes to L.
He was trying to be reassuring. The dark-haired man seemed highly uncomfortable with the new arrangement, but he mimicked Light'a actions and wrapped his arms around the brunette. The stroking began again and Light smiled ever so slightly as he reciprocated it on L's upper arm.
Their eyes locked. Despite the gentleness of their bodies, there was an intensity in their gazes that was even tenser than before. Light found it impossible to break away from that stare, his entire being seemed consumed with the man in front of him, his black eyes, his dark lashes, his pale lips.
Lightning cracked and shook the building. Neither man even as much as blinked. Finally with a mutual sigh they relaxed. L lowered his head and Light touched his forehead to his former enemy's.
Slowly their legs intirewind, careful not to bring their pelvises too close, for they both dreaded the impact of such intimate contact at that point. L pressed his feet to Light's calves and trembled from the delicious warmth that he felt there.
Light hummed in approval and amusement. His hand was now boldly stroking L's shoulder, occasionally causing little shivers to run through the other's body. The brunette felt curious to see how much touching his former enemy would allow. L had never let anybody touch him even remotely like that. Light wondered why this time was so different.
The warm fingers traveled slowly over the cool surface of pale skin until they reached the elbow. L didn't protest. Light felt L repeat the motion and for the first time a small shiver shook him at the cool touch of the detective's hand. Boldly, Light slid his hand down over the black-haired man's side until it rested on his sharply protruding hip.
L's breathing stopped, and so did Light's whose's stomach filled with butterflies. Slowly they both began relaxing again. It was a new sort of game of dare. The former Kira wondered how willing L was to play. The detective didn't make a similar move on Light. His hand remained on his elbow, holding it quite securely. Slowly Light began exploring L's hip, his fingers stroking and feeling it in small patterns.
He didn't dare do much more until the detective's next move, which didn't come for a long time. Light was beginning to feel very comfortable with his newly found fixation, there was something about the feeling he got while touching that particular joint in L's body, that was just so fulfilling…
"Clearly Light-kun has never touched an Illiac crest before," L uttered, more like a question than a mockery.
"Not a male one," Light answered.
"I didn't know Light swung that way," L said after a moment.
"I don't," Light answered with conviction. He didn't. He had never been attracted to a guy. What he felt for L was… different. But it was intense.
"Neither do I," L breathed. His fingers finally sliding to Light's hips. He run them slowly over the velvety skin there making Light feel chills of run all over him.
This is so wrong, Light thought. Outside the storm had subsided and it was only raining heavily, an occasional thunder ripping through the howling of the wind.
When had they inched closer together like that? Their legs were slowly moving against one another impossibly interwined. Their embraces had become tighter and now the sides of their faces were brushing together. He could feel L's nose and cheek stroke against his in a cat-like action. The brunette repeated the action and they brushed their temples together before returning to their earlier position, facing each other.
It was the way Mu was so cruel, outside was so cold, so lonely, so desperate… It was the way they only had each other, and they had walked together for longer than what they could remember… It was the way they clung on to each other for sanity when they had nothing and no one left… It was all Mu's cruel ways of disintegrating the soul to it's barest, most defenseless and honest core…
They had never been honest people, but here they were, in each other's arms, craving nothing more than to brush their lips together, taste each other just a little bit, just once.
And to hell, there was nobody around, nobody watching, nobody would ever know of their fall from grace with all their claims and life-time ideals forgotten over the need of honesty for once. It was dark, and they were in an abandoned house. The rain was the only thing outside and they were alone, warm together, under the covers, covered, hidden. It could happen just once…
So slowly, blocking out all thinking and logic, they moved their heads just a little bit, so that their lips could touch. It was a soft and tentative thing. After a moment, when they were both convinced that it felt good and it was alright, it felt right, they moved a bit more and pressed their lips together.
It could happen once, and it could happen just a little bit more…
So their lips moved, slowly at first, softly parting and tasting.
And it could be just a little bit more, so their kisses became more intense, deeper and more pleasureful. The sparks flew and fell into the dry grass of summer, consuming everything in fire in a matter of seconds.
They were pressing together now, desperate and demanding, having completely surrendered control and pretenses. These were the secrets that they could only share between each other and they had never realized how eager they had been to come clean. Kisses, licks and bites, given and received, desperate breaths, fingers moving, feeling, pleasuring, exploring, invading… and then a sensual groan…
And then a rythm, growing faster; a quicker, desperate breathing as the waves of pleasure consumed them. And with two final screams of pleasure they found the release of years of pent up need.
Light collapsed on L and buried his face in midnight hair. His body was aching with the most guilty type of pleasure after having done the unthinkable with the person who he had sworn his enemy. His brain had kicked in too quickly, coming to terms with what he had done way too soon. Couldn't it wait a bit for it's owner to savor the moment for just a few fleeting seconds?
However Light didn't move off and L didn't try to push him off. They lay there, slowly catching their breaths, their minds blown away with the realizations and the pleasure they had experienced.
After a long moment of silence L's voice sounded somewhere close to Light's ear.
"Do you hate me?"
Light remained quiet. Had he been asked before, he would have known the answer. However he wasn't so sure anymore. He had never been sure, but he had succeeded in lying to himself very well before. So, what could he answer?
"Do you?" he answered with a question.
"Please answer me," L whispered.
It took some time. Perhaps more than an hour.
"No," Light whispered. He wondered if the detective still remembered what they were talking about. Of course he did – this was L.
"Neither do I," L said quietly.
Light raised his head from L's chest and propped himself on one elbow.
"So what now?" he asked softly, looking carefully into those beautiful black eyes that had always held him captive better than handcuffs could.
"Only time can tell," L answered slowly and than the most peculiar thing happened – a genuine smile tugged the corners of his lips. Light was so mesmerized by the phenomenon that he was caught off-guard when L's lips claimed his.
They kissed as the rain slowly subsided and outside the dawn began slowly warming up the atmosphere with a new pinkish hue on a bluer sky, which their afterlives had never seen before.