A/N. First one-shot ever. This is Marco-centric, and really brought about from a review from Vampire Revan, so I personally thank that person! Enjoy!

Summary: 30 ways, and counting on how to make Marco mad/irritated/annoyed/blush. Yeah...Fun!

Disclaimer: Do not own One Piece, make a great christmas present if I suddenly did, but I don't.


1) Tell Marco he looks pretty with the most serious face possible.

2) Call him Mommy/Mama/Mother/etc. in front of his whole crew. Get Ace to do it insistently for added affect.

3) Ask him where babies come from, look completely innocent the whole time.

4) After he explains it to you, ask him if he and Whitebeard are ever having babies!

5) Ignore his protesting and go running about the Moby Dick telling everybody that Marco and Whitebeard are having kids!

6) When someone says Marco, yell out Polo. (Yes I know it's not original)

7) Take all of Marco's clothes, have Ace burn them, and then replace it all with pink frilly dresses!

8) Do the same with his shoes, replace them with high heels.

9) Ask Marco where his nest is.

10) Ask him if he lays eggs.

11) Beg him insistently to let you ride on his back in his phoenix form.

12) Scream like Cheese when he goes really fast or too high in the air.

13) When he is in the middle of sparring with one of the other crewmates, nonchalantly walk in between them suddenly and take your sweet time doing it. (Optional: Drag Ace with you.)

14) Tell Marco Ace loves him.

15) Tell Ace Marco loves him.

16) Sick a pack of rabid fangirls on him.

17) When he asks for help, hide him in a place he can't escape from, and then tell the rabid fangirls where he is.

18) Grab a bag of popcorn and watch the chaos and hilarity insue.

19) Call him a chicken.

20) Call him a turkey!

21) Call him a chicken-turkey thingy.

22) Call him a flaming chicken-turkey thingy.

23) Call him a depraved, flaming chicken-turkey thingy.

24) When he transforms, pretend to freak out, grab a bucket of water, and throw it on him. All the while screaming that Marco is on fire, and then afterwords act completely relieved.

25) When he asks you why you did it, look at him like you have no idea what he's talking about, and then sat straight out: "You're pretty!" Walk away.

26) When Marco comes to talk to you scream your head off. Get Ace and Thatch involved for added affect.

27) When Marco tells you to stop, say you're singing the Bink's Sake. Continue screaming loudly.

28) When Marco is in the crow's nest, yell out to Whitebeard that Marco is nesting again.

29) When he tries to catch you scream loudly, then fall silent and walk away.

30) Repeat the whole list over again in one day. Have fun!

A/N. Ok! Hope you guys liked it, and please feel free to add to the list. I will most likely be adding onto it when the inspiration hits. Enjoy and review please! Bye!

Marco: You are a cruel little girl.

Me: I am not little! Call me that again and I'll add something really embarassing to the next chapter!

Marco: *Grumbles indignantly, but gives.*