Author's Note: Ignore the bold/italicized text until the end. Then it will, most likely, make sense to you all.
Also, the timeline for this might be slightly flawed. It takes place directly after day 321 when Xion notices how much of Roxas' strength she's taken when they're in that cave. I may have added more days between that and the end of the game, but whatever.
It Could Have Gone That Way...
You won't make a fool of yourself.
Xion couldn't sleep. It wasn't an uncommon ocurrence. How many times had she looked at the never changing moon while sleep eluded her? How many times had the problems of her life prompted her to curl into a ball and fight back tears?
Throwing her blankets off, Xion gave up on the prospect of sleep altogether. Her hair-due to her tossing and turning-probably spiked out in a way similar to Roxas', but Xion didn't care. Something was gnawing at her and she knew that she'd never get any sleep if she didn't figure it out. Slipping on a pair of gray house slippers, Xion walked quietly from her room. The long night shirt she wore wound close to her form; even at such a late hour a breeze drifted in from the windows.
Wraping her arms around her chest, Xion was almost surprised that the Organization hadn't heard her yet. Her slippers scuffed across the linoleum floor, so why hadn't someone on guard duty detained her yet? Ever since Axel had brought her back, someone was always posted to make sure she didn't run off again. That was what she'd been told, anyway. She'd slept too peacefully the past few nights to really notice. Despite how messed up their situation was, despite everything that had happened in this prison, Roxas and Axel were Xion's home. Riku was a true friend, of course. But it didn't surprise her in the least that despite being a prisoner in this place, Roxas and Axel's presence made it the most relaxing place in the multiverse.
That was why (even though she seemed free enough at the moment) she couldn't bring herself to leave. As she began trailing a hand over the walls, Xion was quick to try and walk on the tips of her toes. There was something about this moment that screamed pureness to her. Somehow, before she'd done much of anything, she knew this night would be something to remember. She wouldn't let the people in her rank ruin this moment; she would revel in whatever it was she was supposed to revel in.
It was of this mind that Xion found herself outside Roxas' room. A small smile played at her lips when she saw where he rested. He slept completely peaceful, at least. And just like that, it was suddenly clear what was giving her trouble.
"Usually I do all the worrying over you, I don't think it's ever been the other way before," he'd said earlier that evening. Xion had been instantly mad in response. Mainly because his assessment was so wrong. Why would he think she didn't worry about him? As far as Xion knew, friends were supposed to worry about each other. It was constantly worrying about Roxas that drove Xion's actions. She'd thought that she was upset about how obtuse he'd been being.
But that wasn't it at all, was it? Looking at him the way he was now-innocent, carefree and relaxed-it was hard to imagine Roxas being the worry wort. As silly as it was, she didn't want him to worry about her. He was blisfully unaware of everything that was happening, and though it was selfish, she wanted it to remain that way. She hated herself for seeming indifferent, but if it protected Roxas from the harsh truths... she would sooner have him hate her than force Roxas to change.
Maybe it'd be better for everyone if Roxas hated her...
As dark as the thought was, even it wasn't without light. Roxas was talking in his sleep, and Xion felt as though her heart could soar when she focused on what he was saying. "Xion means everything to me. I won't let her be hurt."
It seemed inevitable that this story would end in hurt for someone, but Xion was ever glad for Roxas' hope. And she felt an inkling of hope herself. Maybe, someday, all of her mistakes would be undone.
Xion hung her arms at her side and let the wind have its way with her gray nightgown. Somehow, when she thought of the sky and wind, she felt as though Roxas was watching over her. She felt that the wind was his friendly caress. With a smile on her face, Xion turned and left Roxas' room. But not before she put another seashell on his desk.
Need you. Now more than ever.
Roxas had never been the most observant person in the world. Mainly because he'd never known there was a reason to not trust people. But his first mission with Vexen had been enough to give him a keen eye, at least. So the blond Keybearer knew from the moment he woke up that something was different. A smile crossed his face so wide, that he was sure he probably had dimples. It seemed that Xion had left Roxas another seashell. It had become a sort of game of theirs now. A test to see who could shower each other in the most gifts. They had deemed early on that they would only do it on special occasions though; and Roxas wondered if getting Axel in on the fun would be reason enough to give her one now.
He also wondered what she'd given him one for. Oh well. Trying to figure that out was part of the fun. Pulling his cloak on, Roxas walked over to his desk to have a look at the day's missions. Saïx was as relentless as always, and he had begun telling Roxas all of his missions at the beginning of the week. In doing this, Roxas didn't even have to waste time on getting the mission. Instead, he could set out and do his mission immediately. Roxas hated it on principle because he hated Saïx, but at least he got his missions done earlier this way. This also meant that Saïx wasn't always in the common room. Many times, Roxas had been able to catch Axel and Xion before they left, and goof off with them.
Nothing woke Roxas up more than the sound of his best friends' laughter. Roxas was ever glad that he'd surely be hearing it soon. He quickly grabbed his diary so he could write in it (and for once not have a babysitter yell at him for writing while walking), and he set off down the hall. He was writing in his diary. Or, at least, planned to. Since his diary was always checked for new entries (but never read), Roxas had thought it fun to spin ridiculous stories in it now. Mainly, it had been what he'd done when things had been bad between his two best friends and himself. It helped him keep his mind off things, but now-
"Roxas!" As the boy looked up from his diary, and at an identical pair of eyes to his own, Roxas felt that smile from earlier returning. It was clear that Roxas had interrupted a conversation between Axel and Xion, but he couldn't care when Xion ran towards him and flung her arms around him. Roxas hugged her back in the same moment. It didn't even seem a conscious thought that he should circle his arms around her waist, and pull her as close to him as he could. In fact, he reacted with such enthusiasm that he lifted her off her feet.
Axel, as it was, had stopped turning to face Roxas. He probably had long before Roxas' eyes went to his best friend. But when Roxas turned around to see Xion's face again (she was still safely knitted in his arms) he noted that she had, once again, beat him to the punch. It seemed to Roxas that Xion was always the first to see things. The first to see him. She kissed him on the cheek faintly (though it might have been an accident since their faces were so close), and the two pulled away with equal grins on their faces.
The two walked over to Axel, and each gave him a one-armed hug, but Roxas could tell that it wasn't the same feeling that ignited his veins when he hugged Xion. Axel shook his two best friends off good naturedly, but did seem quite a bit annoyed at having to play babysitter to Xion's kitten that was coiling around Axel's leg like a snake. At least, Roxas guessed that it was Xion's cat. It had vacated her arms when she'd thrown herself at him. Coincidentally, the diary that Roxas had thrown away in that same instant was being pawed through by the cat. More over, its claws were tearing at the pages.
"What's all of this?" Roxas asked as he sat down on the eerily vacant couch. Axel and Xion followed his movement, and without thinking, Roxas pulled Xion's legs out from under her so she could lay them over his lap. The fourteenth member smiled sheepishly, but stretched out anyway.
Axel's eyes met Roxas', and the older member lifted an eyebrow. With the light of Kingdom Hearts casting its glow on Axel, Roxas felt as though Axel's eyes looked more brown than green. They were somehow warmer, but less emotional simutaneously. It was almost like the mud solidifying into dirt. Roxas shook his head away from the bizarre thought. He didn't want to imagine how and why his best friend might shut off his usual behavior.
Xion seemed oblivious to Roxas' bizarre thoughts. In fact, Axel did, too. The cat jumped up onto Axel's lap, and the pyromaniac cursed under his breath, but found himself petting the rich, chocolate fur coat regardless. Xion leaned over towards Roxas, and put a hand on his leg sincerely when she said, "I may have pawned some of the seashells you gave me and bought Cinnamon here."
"Cinnamon the chocolate colored cat," Axel laughed under his breath. The two teens ignored the comment, and seemed to ignore Axel completely. Needless to say, Axel scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest.
Xion pulled out from under her cloak, a pendant from a choker around her neck. It was of a cat very similar looking to Cinnamon. Roxas touched it awed, but quickly withdrew his hand when he realized how close his hand was to Xion's chest. She knew it too, but held his hand steady. For a moment, the two just stared at each other. Finally, Xion took the necklace off and gave it to Roxas. "Here. This is for you. I already gave you a seashell for, technically, buying Cinnamon for me, but take this, too."
"So we'll always remain connected," Roxas said with a cheeky set to his face. Xion smirked, and bonked his forehead playfully.
Axel laughed at that, if nothing else, and removed himself from the couch. Instead, he sat on the floor right between his two best friends. Cinnamon still resided on his lap, and hissed some as he extended his claws, and dug them into Axel's legs so he wouldn't fall. The senior member (compared to the kids) didn't even seem to notice. Organization cloaks were, indeed, very resistant. "And again, I'm left out." Axel's gloved hands enclosed over a hand from both Roxas and Xion.
Xion put Axel's hand to her cheek, and then travelled it up directly under her eye. Tears brimmed at the corner of her lashes, and Axel's well placed hand caught them easily. Roxas simply smoothed out Axel's fist, and responded, "Actually, Axel, I was meaning to ask you if you wanted to play the seashell game with us. We don't want to leave you out. It's a lot of fun, isn't it, Xion?"
Axel shook his head. He was disagreeing before the question had even completely left Roxas' mouth. But he was smiling happily, and a little wickedly. Folding his hands behind his neck, Axel simply said, "Count me out of playing 'I Spy'. But if you're going to totrute Saïx by disobeying orders, bringing in cats, or whatever else your minds come up with... count me in."
In turn, Roxas and Xion also had the most wicked looks Axel had ever seen on their faces.
No one blames you.
Xion wasn't exactly sure what world she'd ended up in. Cobblestone streets seemed to go in every direction. There was a huge throng of people exerting mirth as they went to and fro. Different attractions snaked in and out of the crowded area, but the most breathtaking thing to Xion was the bell tower. Each bell rang out with its own kind of force; Xion couldn't help but compare them to the powerful Lexaeus.
She pulled her cloak closer to her, however. There were a lot of people, and discretion was key. She was in a world she wasn't supposed to be in. If the Organization found out... no she couldn't continue that thought. She had to keep her head down, and her hood up.
And your chin up, Xion. Xion laughed at that. Yes, that was certainly something that Roxas would say to her. Roxas had told her once that he had a voice in his head that sounded like her. Apparently, it urged him to be more responsible, and let him know he was loved if he was feeling down. The voice Xion heard from Roxas was similar to the last part, but it urged her to have more fun.
Fun... how could she have fun when she knew she was taking Roxas' strength? When she knew that she was nearly destroying him? When she knew what the Organization had planned for them in a few days' time?
She looked at the shops that lined the edges of the streets. It was mostly a distraction. And she could do without those. Her feet couldn't seem to walk forward anymore. Not even if she was on her tip toes.
Tip toes... that night that she'd left the seashell for Roxas played in her head again. She'd been lying, of course, when she'd told him why she'd left him the seashell and given him the necklace. Xion knew that Roxas suspected something, but she comforted herself in knowing that he probably couldn't guess the real reason. After all, he'd only been talking in his sleep. He probably didn't even remember what he'd said. That was why she shouldn't have put any weight on his words.
Uneeded to say, Xion was having a bad day. Today everything she was running from seemed to have come back to her. She wondered, then, why she didn't try to do anything about it. Why did she allow herself to be a puppet in every meaning of the word? She looked back on the time Roxas had suggested they run away, and she wished she would have agreed. It was too late now. It was always too late, wasn't it?
She was startled when two kids bumped into her, as they ran forward. When her hood fell backwards, it was like she was seeing the world in color for the first time. Others were dressed up, too. They were wearing cloaks, but the hoods seemed to be at the waist of the cloaks rather than the head. She also noted that some of the cloaks were wrapped around people's waists rather than their chests. Despite the odd uses of the cloaks, Xion was blown away at how everyone was wearing them.
The Organization had ordered them to stay away from the worlds' citizens, but what was the point when she was going to defy them? What was the point when they were all really the same? And they were. Who cared if someone had made her? She would rise above the wills of her creators, and she would do things her way. She would do things right.
With this new, uplifting thought, Xion pressed a finger to her lips, as a smile grew there. At that exact moment, she saw a puppet fall loose of the puppeteer's hand. At once, he appeared out from under the stage he was hiding behind. When the man clad in purple noted Xion's fixation on the fallen puppet, the man strode over to Xion and gave her the puppet without a word. He did, however, rustle her short, ebony locks some.
Suddenly, Xion felt more free than she ever had. She could be herself now. That was always what she should have been. Not Sora. Not Kairi. And not a puppet. When Xion returned to the Organization's headquarters, she put the puppet on her desk as a reminder of all she'd realized. There, she found another seashell. Once again, she put a finger to her lips when a smile appeared there. Xion didn't even care that she should have been the one giving Roxas things (because of what her cover story had led him to believe).
Instead, she pulled out another necklace band, and clipped the seashell to it. When she wound it around her neck, and looked into the mirror, she could see clearly what Roxas would be saying to her now if he knew what she was thinking. "No one blames you, Xion."
Out loud, she said the words, "Nobody blames you," to herself. She did so until the words seemed to come from her. Until she believed then. Cinnamon jumped into her lap the exact moment she did.
Yeah, she does.
Roxas kicked his feet against the Clock Tower, as he sat with the very world beneath him. He'd been on a recon mission in Neverland so had arrived at the Clock Tower sooner rather than later. Roxas looked at the ever setting sun and wished it gave more of a clue as to how long he'd been waiting. "Where are you guys?" He mumbled unintentionally.
"That's insulting, you know."
Roxas nearly jumped out of his skin at the inclusion of a new and familiar voice. "Xion!" he exclaimed.
The girl smiled widly before she sat down in her usual spot next to Roxas. Of its own accord, Roxas' face lit up the moment she gave him a thing of Sea Salt ice cream. "So," Roxas said between bites of the tasty treat. "What did you mean about me insulting you?"
"You said 'guys.'" Upon seeing the blank look on Roxas' face, Xion must have seen it best to drop the subject. Roxas noted that she looked down at the town he had been prior, and not at him. "It doesn't matter; I was only joking, Roxas." Xion turned away from Roxas and set to eating her own hard earned Sea-Salt bar. Roxas watched her with a hand on his knee. It was half inclined towards Xion (he remembered her sincere hand on his knee days earlier), but he didn't know if she'd appreciate it now. She seemed... different. A good different. She seemed... happy. But if he put a reassuring hand on her, would it make her go defensive?
Unaware of Roxas' inner struggle, Xion savored her own reward. Finally, she said, "Axel was so right when he called this the icing on the cake. My mission was so tough today that I didn't think I'd make it in time to come and see you."
Roxas looked at Xion with strong amazement now. "What did they have you do?" He shoved his earlier thoughts to the side, as he noted the beautiful glow in Xion's eyes when she looked to the right, and recalled her day.
He was insanely curious, but after a moment, Xion shrugged as if the mission hadn't been so bad after all. "They sent me to a really different world today; someplace called Traverse Town. I was only supposed to be collecting hearts, but I ended up passing out again. I was out for most of the day, and when I woke up I thought I'd missed this time with you. It didn't help that as a punishment Saïx made me do five Holo missions. He thinks that my lack of strength is from 'foregoing training and going straight into real battles.' Axel saw the whole ordeal and decided to talk to Saïx about it. I'm glad."
Roxas had the sense that Xion's last words held more weight than they implied. Things weren't perfect between Axel and Xion anymore. Xion wasn't the only one that was glad that Axel was acting like a friend again.
But there was another part of Roxas that was jealous of the strong pull that Axel seemed to have over Saïx. The only people with power over Roxas were his friends. So had Axel and Saïx once been friends? Were they still friends? If Axel was friends with Saïx, Roxas wasn't sure what he'd do. Axel's connection to Saïx had gotten the three out of many scrapes, but there was no excuse for the way that Saïx treated Xion. If Axel could support that...
Roxas clenched his fists and tried not to think about it. But still, his thoughts wouldn't leave him alone. Axel had attacked Xion. How could he expect anything better from Axel now? Then again, Xion had fought back, and was the one who'd run away in the first place. But wasn't that because of the way people treated her?
Yes, yes it was. Roxas eyed Xion to the best of his ability. He actually tried to see her the way the others seemed to. But the way she looked out towards the sky with a serene smile on her face seemed to scream pureness. Xion was angelic. She was so good and true. In fact, some of her powerful words were sweeping over him now. And when they did, he felt born anew. When he did, he knew he could let go of all that had been holding him back. Roxas, I wouldn't be sitting here with you if Axel hadn't done that.
There was only one thing he was absolutely sure of: he was glad to have Xion back. Those words also held more weight than they would seem to to someone else. Though Axel's methods had been horrible, he was still glad for them in the end. Xion was back.
"You know what I don't get?" Roxas said to change the subject (he wanted to live in the here and now, and not dwell on the past), "You aim to be as strong as us guys, but you were insulted when I called you that; when I was only speaking in the general term. Anyway, shouldn't you have considered that a compliment?"
Xion stuck her tongue out at Roxas before spewting her own insults at him. "You have no manners, Roxas. You are insulting and just awful." And then Xion was laughing hysterically.
It didn't take too long for Roxas to join in; he'd missed this light-hearted type of conversation. Playing off the mood he said, "I tell you nothing is as insulting as Xigbar calling me 'Kiddo'." Roxas complained, as he crossed his arms over his chest distastefully. Gosh, he felt like Axel. His trademark pose was more of putting his hands behind his head. Just as the thought crossed his mind, Xion put one of her arms behind her head. However, she had her elbow come forward when Roxas would have just put it to his side. With her other arm, Xion shrugged nonchalantly. "Actually, I think Xigbar calling me 'Poppet' is worse."
"And we're not going to include Larxene or the deceased members' names for us, right?" It was sort of ironic that with his own elbow, Roxas was angling it so he was closer to Xion's face.
Said girl giggled, and nodded her head eagerly. "Right. And we won't talk about what Saïx calls me."
"Xion," Roxas wans't quite sure what he was saying her name for. All he knew was that his hand was now cradling Xion's face, and that she was leaning into him. It must have been for what Saïx did to belittle her, because Roxas found himself wiping away a tear as it came to existance under her eyelid.
Alas, he just missed it. Instead, the tear drop curved around his finger, and fell to the city below them. As Roxas watched its journey, he couldn't help but feel that the very ocean was crying. Xion often reminded Roxas of the sea. Beautiful, calming, routine. But also mysterious, dangerous at times, and warring with her emotions. Even then, she was always beautiful. Xion was the most beautiful girl in the world.
Even when she was the ocean, she was still an angel. She was still good and true. She was still pure. "You mean everything to me, Xion. I won't let you be hurt." And Roxas had never meant anything more than he meant this. He'd never been as emotional over something as he was this. He never wanted something like this.
Xion pulled away from Roxas, and he exhaled in a slight bit of pain. In that moment, when Xion was smiling at the sky again, she turned to him. She smiled in a way he'd never seen before, and he knew he'd take it to his grave.
"Is it me, or does Xion have something about her that seems to defy the impossible?" Roxas thought to himself. And when Xion leaned her head on his shoulder lovingly, and put an arm around his waist, he answered himself. "Yeah, she does."
Roxas would remember that most of all when, despite all odds, he held onto the memory of Xion herself.
When are you going to get it into your head? We're in this together!
Demyx was playing his sitar again. This didn't surprise Roxas. Demyx's entire life revolved around the thing. But he didn't very much look forward to the idea of going out into the lobby if that was the case. Whenever Demyx played music like this, he would get lost in it completely. Roxas had found it awkward when he'd crossed Demyx on such occasions. By all means, Demyx shouldn't have been capable of such masterpieces without a heart.
Of course, Roxas shouldn't have been able to feel what he did, either. But Roxas had good enough reasons for his own experiences. His friends. They brought him to life. They made him learn new things all the time. They made him feel. Especially a certain black haired girl. She made him feel things he wouldn't completely understand until he had a heart of his own. More often than not, Demyx's arrangements made Roxas think about her and all he didn't understand. And it seemed to be that, more than anything, that made Roxas stay in his rooms on nights like this.
Kingdom Hearts was bright and huge in the sky, and when he saw Xion in the reflection of the glass, he thought her even more surreal, as she abashedly shied away from the light that was cast down on her. If Roxas didn't know Xion, he would have assumed she was discrediting her part in creating a nearly functional Kingdom Hearts, but he did in fact know her, and it wasn't exactly rocket science to realize something else was on her mind. "Xion?" he asked, as he talked past the lump in his throat. He sped to the doorway of his room as fast as he could, and held her hands in his own. Roxas' eyes locked on hers imploringly.
If he would have been focusing on other things at the moment, he might have noted that she was barefoot. That she was wearing a cream dress almost suiting as a party dress for a bride. She had a clip in her hair (that matched the dress), and it kept her bangs out of her face. Roxas had never been more glad for it. Her eyes were so gorgeous, and now they weren't obscured. With those eyes, he understood he would give her everything and nothing. Because nothing he gave her would ever surpass the soul she blessed his life with. The soul he was looking into right now.
Xion's eyes shied away from Roxas', as if she feared the power she had over him. Roxas noticed that her eyes trailed to his own bare feet. Smirking at that, she seemed to find her resolve. She looked at Roxas' eyes again, and spoke in a placating voice. "Dance with me?"
Well, at least the placating tone made sense now. She had obviously known what he'd say, and was trying to talk him out of it. Despite knowing this, Roxas saw no reason to try and stop her. No reason to let her try and convince him. Xion was a funny person by nature. If, nothing else, the girl would probably serve in amusing him. "I can't dance, Xi." Roxas told her with a smirk that mirrored her earlier one.
The girl stepped towards his chest, anyway. She forced his arms around her, but it was her own around him that really loosened Roxas up. They began swaying back and forth, and when Xion did speak, it was belatedly. "When are you going to get it into your head? We're in this together. I'll help you not to make a fool of yourself. Not that it matters, anyway."
That was true, at least. They were in the safety of his room, and no one could see them. Well, Cinnamon was wagging his tail, as he'd come and sat in a basket under Roxas' dresser. (Xion had chosen the perfect cat, it seemed. It knew to hide as well as she did.) The feline was even more amused when the two's necklaces tangled together. But through all that, the two danced a flawless dance. It's words told more than they ever would, as they spun, swayed, dipped, and stayed close to each other.
On one certain dip, Roxas noted that Xion nestled deeply into his chest the moment he pulled her up. In response, Roxas buried his face in her shoulder, as he smiled. It wasn't the most joyful or happy smile he'd ever had, but it held the most meaning. It was the most important one. Roxas would look back on this night, and remember how it had been one of the only nights he followed the heart he did, in fact, have.
Even when Demyx stopped playing his music, the two did not stop. And though the dance seemed to prove otherwise, Roxas understood that she'd been uneasy about Demyx's music, too. She'd come to Roxas' room to get past the ridiculousness of it all, and just be with him. Roxas felt his own tears well up, as pent up thoughts and emotions aimed to undo him. He couldn't shake the feeling that this was all going to end badly. After all, the Organization had nearly caused them to kill each other in Halloween Town that day. How could it ever be okay after that?
It was for that reason that they needed this dance now. They needed the reassurance. This perfect moment together. "Xion, I'm worried. And I'm scared! Today-"
"Shh. You don't have to tell me Roxas. The music in your heart says it all." Xion smiled at Roxas, and in that moment he couldn't even argue he didn't have a heart. It sure as hell felt like he did. Roxas leaned his forehead against Xion's, and just soaked up the presence of the girl he would have died to protect. When she spoke again, her lips whispered against his own. "We're in this together, Roxas. We'll always be together."
It feels like this.
That night, Xion couldn't sleep again. But she had another reason to stay awake this time, and it was the fact that she was actually capable of such a feat. Xion had been trying so hard to keep her strength at a moderate level. Even maybe sickly if it would have made Roxas better. But despite her best efforts, she was still more powerful than him. And if Axel hadn't stepped in... even if she hadn't killed him herself... his strength very well might have completely disappeared then. He could have died against the "Heartless". Against her. She couldn't stay any longer. It was as simple as that. She would leave tomorrow. She was sure that Axel would take care of Cinnamon (Xion doubted Axel would take the time to teach Roxas to care for the animal the way he had Xion), but other than that, her affairs were in order.
She'd had her final moment with Roxas. And though he was probably suspicious again, she knew he didn't know enough to stop her. And Axel... well, she'd just have to leave without saying goodbye to him. Otherwise, he would only try and stop her. Really, what was the point of it all? She might as well have just left already. But as that thought left her in a crippled mess, she rolled over in her bed, and allowed herself to be selfish one more time.
She wasn't even aware that she'd fallen asleep. Though she surmised she must have been talking while unconscious because there were arms around her. Arms she would know anywhere. They held her close, and the owner's lips dropped a kiss to her forehead. Her lips had slightly kissed these very ones that evening. It seemed, Roxas wasn't as oblivious as she'd earlier believed. She'd failed then. And if she had, what was the point of hiding her anguish anymore? So with a gasp, the fourteenth member threw her arms around Roxas' neck, and buried her face in his chest, as she sobbed.
Roxas didn't ask her a thing, as he drew comforting patterns into her back. He only spoke when Xion, half-crazed, asked, "What does it feel like, Roxas? To have a heart?"
"It feels like this," was his quick and true answer. And then he was leaning his head against hers, and hugging her to him for his own support. Xion, oddly, was very happy that she had washed her hair that morning. It smelled of citrus. Not that she could tell with how her nose was all stuffed up now, and she was crying with gusto. She wondered, then, why she had ever wanted a heart in the first place.
The answer came from her best- Oh, who was she kidding? If she was prepared to die for him, she wasn't going to lie to herself anymore. He was the love of her life. The answer came from the love of her life, as he rolled them over onto their sides so they could look into each other's faces. "It's ironic that we fought so hard to get emotions just like this, isn't it?" Roxas asked, as he held his head up with his hand. "But if it weren't for emotions like this, I wouldn't know how much you mean to me, Xion. I wouldn't know anything. And you never would have been in my life. That's why this is all worth it. Why I fight everyday. Why I know everything will work out in the end."
Xion rolled to her side away from Roxas, as she laughed at that. Leave it to Roxas to return sense to her when she was half mad. He was absolutely right. He could always see everything so clearly. That was why the world needed him. Not her. And that was why she wouldn't sway from her course. If she loved Roxas like this, it would only be right to save him. So Xion rubbed at her eyes, and returned to Roxas' side. He looked so amazing in the dark of her room. He was light and dark all mixed into one. He was what Nobodies were supposed to be. But despite the way his features looked right now, Xion knew that Roxas was all Light.
Not really being aware of what she was saying, Xion said, "Maybe we should just stay here. Grow old."
And even though they couldn't, it felt like an eternity as they laid there until dawn. During the night, the two had shared their first kiss. It was as innocent, loving, and self-sacrificing as the two sharing it, and Xion couldn't have asked for more. It gave her the strength she needed to escape from Axel and Xigbar that day. It was led her to go meet Naminé, and force Roxas to destroy her. Though it was really her strength-the strength she had stolen from him and Sora-she was giving back, she preferred to believe it was her heart.
That night in Roxas' arms lived on in Xion's memory forever.
I think I've known for awhile. And I think you have, too.
"I think I've known for awhile. And I think you have, too." It's about a year later, perhaps more, that Roxas utters these words to Xion. The two had been saved by Sora. And their endeavors with the Realm of Sleep, and Xehanort had come to a close. However, there's one thing that threatens the otherwise happy times. Roxas' connection to Ventus. It seemed that the once Nobody had taken too much away from his dopplegangar, and would now have to undergo a procedure to get those parts seperated from him.
And Xion, when she looks into the eyes of her one true love, is more furious and scared than she'd ever been for herself. "No!" She exclaims this as she throws herself at him, and encircles her arms around his waist. Her head pressing into his shoulder causes memory after memory after memory to play behind her eyelids. To Xion, it was all utter ridiculousness. Everything was fine now! What was there to complain about? Why even chance their happy ending over something so stupid?
Roxas pushes Xion away from him, but he doesn't do so unkindly. Her eyes are forced to look into his, and when she does, she instantly hates what she sees there. Ugh. Why did the Destiny Islands' night seem to paint him even more perfect to her then their "last" night together? It's too hard to say no to this angelic face. Especially when his blue eyes are crinkled with warmth, and he's now speaking to her with a persuading air. "It'll be fine, Xion. Yen Sid, Merlin, and Donald all agree. We've all given parts of ourselves back, I just overlooked this one part. It'll be fine."
Xion wanted to argue. She really did. But she couldn't argue when the person she was promised to looked at her like that. She puts a hand to his cheek, and is reminded of times previous when he'd done the same to her. She brushes away the tear, she knew would be there, the instant it falls. Why was it when she was sacrificing herself it was easy to be brave, but now when it's Roxas... she knew the answer to that already, didn't she? It's the reason she'd been prepared to die for him in the first place. "If only you could be saying those things in regard to your feelings for Naminé."
At that, Roxas has to laugh. Xion joins in, too. But it was more for the tickling sensation his kisses to her fingers have, then the fact that she'd be be willing to give Roxas to her friend if he didn't have to sacrifice himself. "Look, I won't be alone. You know Axel will tag along. And then the worrying will be over, and-"
Roxas' words are effectively cut off when he feels Xion's lips against his own, and responds eagerly. The sun sinks below the horizon like Twilight Town's, the gulls cry in the night sky, and the tide pulls a large amount of sand back to the ocean before they're done. Again, Roxas rests his head against Xion's forehead, and the once fourteenth member has to laugh before kissing the corners of his lips again. Still in that embrace, Xion finds it in her to say something that's been on her mind for awhile. "I've always admired your courage, Roxas. But sometimes you can be really thick. We're in this together. And now, we really will be together forever. I'll go with you."
As the two trail along the beach to find the mages, one would be able to see their necklaces gleaming in the slight night, them picking up seashells, and Cinnamon following behind them. But more than that, you'd see them holding hands. United as the same person. As soul mates.
Author's Note: Forgive any mistakes. Without Microsoft Word, and a really busy schedule, there are undoubtedly some ones I missed.
This is for my dear friend Kutlessrocker, and I really hope you liked it, Josh. This wasn't at all what I had planned when you told me you liked RokuShi. It was supposed to be humurous and fun, but somehow it ended up being their last days together, and my overwhelming love for this pairing, crashed into one. Sorry if this is too angsty.
And as everyone's undoubtedly figured out, the bold/italicized text is from Harry Potter. And you've probably noted that some of the lines and writing are very similar to it and J.K. Rowling's style (in some ways). I really hope you liked it, Kuttle. I don't even know if you've had a chance to read HP yet.
But... I'd had parts of this already written. And the video: "It could have gone that way..." | harry & hermione by tennisgirlxoxo on YouTube really inspired me to finish this. It also set the tone. Seriously, watch the video. I owe so much to it for this story. Or at least listen to the amazing song, "Your Hand in Mine" by Explosions in the Sky.
I almost called the fic that song's name. But since I realized I'd incorperated a lot from that video, I might as well just call it the same thing. Especially since I see Roxas/Xion as a "It could have gone that way" thing. Like, they could have ended up together if fate hadn't messed it up in Days. "It could have gone that way" in KH3 when Roxas might end up with Naminé instead of Xion. And "it could have gone that way" if Nomura actually made pairings canon. LOL.
So, someday, when we all want to remember our love for RokuShi (and how beautiful it is), may we all come to this fic and realize "it could have gone that way."
And I should let it be known that I love the Ron/Hermione and Harry/Ginny pairings, and prefer Harry/Hermione as just best friends. However, as J.K. Rowling said, I do sort of enjoy their pairing as a "could have been" kind of thing. And I'm probably crazy, but I do see some similarities between Harry/Hermione and Roxas/Xion, so this came into fruition. I hope you all enjoyed the madness.
And, once again, I really hope you liked it, Josh. If not, just say the word and I'll write you something else. While I actually like this, I realize people might not be crazy like me, so...
The only thing that bothers me about this fic is the first bold/italicized bit. I don't think it fits as well as the others, but I was bound by Hermione's words. Oh well. Just imagine "You won't make a fool of yourself" to mean "I won't let you lose yourself with all of these bad secrets around" or something.
And, yes, I do realize the order of POVs change at a certain point. There's a reason for that, that I hope is obvious, but if you want me to tell you, I will.
Anyway, I've rambled enough. Merry (way early) Christmas everyone. And if you feel so inclined, check out my other stories. I'll be uploading tons this month.
I just realized this is my fiftieth fic. Yay! -throws confetti-
It's two in the morning, and I should go to sleep now.