Author's notes: Just wanted to say that this story was really hard to write because of my love of Brody, but hopefully it'll come off well and can be enjoyed by all. :)
Team Brody: I'm SO sorry; Team Danny: This does NOT mean I am now on your side. ;D
I don't own any part of "Against The Wall" or the song at the end!
It was a bright, warm, sunshine day in the city of Chicago; the birds were chirping, a slight breeze blew through on occasions to keep things pleasant and somewhere else in the city people were laughing and sharing quality time with their friends and family, however, all was not the case where Internal Affairs Detective Abigail Kowalski stood amongst a group of others who were experiencing the very same thing as her. Abby, as most called her, couldn't feel the warm sun on her skin, she couldn't hear the birds singing, and most of all the last thing she felt like doing was laughing; crying was more the traditional emotion shown for where she currently was - which was in a grave yard along with other fellow officers dressed in their best dress uniforms scattered among grieving friends and family there to honor one of their own: fallen officer Jonathan Brody. Abby still couldn't believe it was true, Brody was gone and he wasn't coming back; it was like some strange dream she was in and despite how desperately she wanted to wake up she just couldn't find the power to do so!
This wasn't suppose to be happening she thought to herself once more, they were suppose to go to some late night dinner somewhere on some day, "Next time." they'd always agree...where was their next time now; couldn't Brody have gotten an extra one just this once so all this sorrow could be avoided? She would have gladly given him one of hers without question, all she needed now was the person with whom to make the trade. A warm breeze blew through the area then and it sent chills to Abby's very core as she thought back on how this all started to begin with; she'd been at work going over a case with Lina involving cops taking pay offs to tip drug dealers to upcoming raids when she heard the news.
"Flores!" Lt. Detective Papadol called out to Abby's new partner from his office.
"Be back in a second." the young pregnant woman said as worked to stand up then and head into her commander's office.
Abby could still remember seeing Lina close the door behind her after she'd entered; she could remember seeing the older man and woman discussing something and on occasion look her way. Finally after a few moments she looked up when she heard her partner call her name and nod towards the room she and their boss were in; "Yes sir?" she had asked figuring this was going to be yet any other warning to be careful of some of the higher ups they questioned, instead she heard Lina say, "Abby, sit down." in a tone of voice she'd come to know only as not good.
"I think I'll stand." she replied getting a sudden very bad vibe about the way this conversation was headed; she then saw her boss's mouth begin to move but couldn't quite make out what he had said except for 3 distinct words: Brody, died, and hero; Brody was a hero but died, that one didn't make much sense to her, "I'm sorry, Lt., could you repeat that?" she asked him.
"I'm sorry for your loss, Detective Kowalski. Officer Brody was a fine member of this organization and he will be missed." Papadol stated, his next sentence being cut off before it could even begin though.
"How did it happen?" Abby asked quickly, "When? I'm sorry sir but Officer John Brody ALWAYS wore a bullet proof vest and based on our last rounds of testing they were rated to withstand any current ordinance out there so you'll have to excuse me if I'm finding it just a little more than hard to believe what you just said."
"5 am and he was off duty which is why he didn't have his vest on him. It was an attempted robbery at a local convenient store in Officer Brody's neighbor hood; shots were fired and he put he put himself in the way to save a young girl. Wounds were a shot to the lower right side of the back and entrance but no exit to the upper left side...bullet hit a rib, took a few tumbles around inside before puncturing the heart." Papadol did his best to explain to the young woman as he watched her back up to the glass door in his office and place her hands behind her for balance. "The gunman was neutralized a few minutes ago and will face a quick in and out trial, I can assure you of that."
Abby did her best to try and take a few deep breaths but couldn't; "I ah...I need to...I need a moment sir, excuse me please." she said quickly before bolting from the room.
"Take all day!" Papadol did his best to call after her before turning to her partner and his right hand and saying, "You too huh. Hand off everything you got to Morgan and Wilson and then go find your partner."
"Yes sir." Lina replied simply with a nod before heading out quickly to exchange one assignment for another.
The moments after that seemed almost like a blur now, they were filled with disbelief still until she called Richie's cell and getting no reply she then called his home only to hear Laura answer with a somber tone and once learning that it was Abby on the other end of the line the other woman began to give out sympathies to her as well; it was all truly too much for the young blonde detective who said she'd just call back later and quickly hung up. How she even came to the next part of her day she still couldn't tell you, but there she was in the police department morgue standing over the very pale body of her former friend and lover; "Brody." she whispered sadly as she wiped the tears now freely falling from her face. "I am SO sorry." she told him yet not really knowing where to start really since suddenly she felt sorry for just so much involving him.
"You shouldn't be down here you know." came a voice from behind her. Quickly doing her best to wipe away her tears, Abby turned around to see Lina standing there.
"Lina, I..." she stated to say but was quickly cut off by her partner holding her hand up and saying not to say anything; after all, she'd feel the same way if the situation was God forbid reversed.
"Doctor Ambrose says his parents are coming to pick him in a hour. You want a chair while you wait?" Lina asked having long ago decided to just be there for her partner no matter what in this dark time. Seeing Abby sake her head no she gave a simple, "Ok." before quickly sending out a thanks to the Heavens above that it wasn't her or Carlos in this situation yet; after that she began to wait silently along with the young woman for the remainder of the time.
The standard 21 gun salute brought Abby out of her past and back into her present as she watched two fellow officers fold the American flag that had draped over Brody's cherry wood coffin into a triangle and present it to his mother. She couldn't help but focus on the white stars and blue background as a voice inside her head said with a small laugh, "You can't use Polish words Kowalski, that's cheating!" A smile formed on her lips for brief moment and a small chuckle escaped her mouth before she placed a hand over it reminding herself of where she was and just like that the small moment of joy was gone; gone like the nights of Scrabble and Monopoly, the pizza dinners, and the thrill of after glow from great sex with the most wonderful guy she knew outside of those in her own family. Abby watched then as the group that had gathered to say their goodbyes began to scatter leaving behind only John's parents, her brother Richie, and a few other patrol officers from their unit; she watched the officers, including her brother, form a line to say their final goodbyes to both Brody and his parents.
Feeling a hand on her shoulder, Abby turned around and looked down to see Lina dressed in her dress blues as well, her white cap under her arm; "I'm heading out; you need anything before I go?" the Latin woman asked. "No. But thank you Lina...for everything." Abby said leaning down to hug the woman knowing she could never truly repay the kindness she had shown her over the last few hours yet also knowing that her partner would never call in such a favor because it was just the kind of person she was at heart.
"Call me if me ya need anything alright." Lina said, not leaving until Abby agreed to do so.
Turning back around to see that she was one of only two people left in the cemetery then Abby gathered all the courage she could, took a deep breath and headed over the older woman; removing her hat, she tucked it under her arm and said, "Mrs. Brody, I'm..." but before she could say her name the elder woman cut her off.
"Abby." the older woman dressed all in black spoke before looking up to the curly blonde haired woman who had almost tripped on her way over and giving the faint hint of a smile said; "John spoke highly of you once I finally got him to open up. He loved you so much that boy of mine; I know he had a bit of a past when it came to women so I can understand you two wanting to take your time getting together but I just thought you should know that he did love you despite what you may of heard about him before hand."
"I know." Abby told her honestly looking at the green grass ground for a brief second, "I'm sorry we missed out meeting one another in a better place; I just thought...I thought there'd be more time." she said.
"We always do." Mrs. Brody said looking ahead at her son's final resting place; "John knew the risks of being an officer though just as I'm sure you do; time is a luxury we don't have Abby and those of you who serve us even less I'm afraid. Memories, however, you can hold on to for all your time and I know if there was one other person in this world John could share his with other than his parents it'd be you." she said as she reached into her purse and dug out something which she kept hidden in her hand as she stood up then. Reaching for Abby's left white-gloved hand, she placed a simple metal key in the younger woman's palm and said, "Take whatever you'd like, we insist."
Abby didn't have to ask what the key opened, she already knew it was to Brody's apartment; "Thank you, Mrs. Brody." she said to the woman who in another life could have been her mother in-law, "What would you like me to do with it afterwards?" she asked.
"Pass it along to your brother Richard if you don't mind; he's offered to help my husband bring the rest of John's things home tomorrow." Mrs. Brody replied.
"I will ma'am." Abby said with a promising nod before watching the woman walk towards her husband who had brought their car around so they could go home for some rest. Giving the man a wave she watched as they began to leave the area followed by a mark patrol car who had no doubtfully offered to escort them back; Abby quickly pocketed the house key as not to lose it and walked over to coffin still awaiting burial. As she placed a hand on the polished wood, she felt tears once more threaten to fall and in that very moment she did the only thing she knew how to do at times like this - she sang.
"So I'll go...but I know...I will think of you every step of the way." she began softly, "And I will always love you. I will always love you. You, my darling you. Bittersweet memories that is all I'm taking with me. So, goodbye. Please, don't cry." she sang as she herself could not stop crying, the next part of the song however she refused to do simply because she knew it was a lie - just like he needed her she needed Brody and whenever she called he was there for her no questions asked; it was one of the many things she'd miss about him she knew but not the last by far.
Skipping ahead to more pleasant versus, Abby continued her moment with the man she had loved even though she had never told him sadly, a great tragedy on her part she felt, "I hope life treats you kind. And I hope you have all you've dreamed of. And I wish to you, joy and happiness. But above all this, I wish you love." Why hadn't she just agreed that he was right? She did love him, she did want a relationship with him and now it was all gone along with any other joyous moments they might have shared together.
"And I will always love you. I will always love you. I will always love you. You, darling, I love you. Ooh, I'll always, I'll always love you." she finished then, "I will always love you, Jonathan Brody; always." Abby told him leaning down and placing a kiss on the coffin before raising back up; another breeze blowing through yet this time Abby could feel a small twinge of warmth and it made her smile. She turned to walk away then, the smile still on her face, thinking about a Scrabble board that held more than just plastic letters, pictures which showed the man she had loved, and last but certainly not least a brown leather jacket that she knew the moment she put on would smell just like Brody and just for a moment she could feel his arms around her again and know that just like always he'd make everything okay again.
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