Dramacon - Love & Sarcasm: Part II

I knocked on Christie's hotel room door just a little before nine o'clock with coffee and a cinnamon bagel from the local coffee shop in my hand. Nothing says "I'm sorry" like free food, right?

Her crazy friend from the other day opened the door. Outstanding. Be nice, Matt.

"Now that's what I call room service," she said with a smile.

Uh? "…Is Christie here?"

"She's indisposed. But I'm available."

No thanks. The door suddenly opened a bit wider, revealing her slightly less crazy partner in crime from the other day.

"Are you?" She scolded the other girl, "Your boyfriend will be surprised."

"I was just kidding!"

Had I been in a better mood, I probably would have started laughing, but as it were, well… I was nervous. Just a little.

Beth pushed the two of them out of the way. Thank god. The sane friend.

"What do you want?"

"Just to talk to her."

She stared at me for a second, scrutinizing me. It made me want to look away. She suddenly broke eye contact and looked over to where I assumed the bedroom was.

"Fine. But she's still sleeping. Good luck with that."

The crazy friend already had a camera in her hand, "Give her a kiss! Maybe she'll wake up!"

Perhaps. But there was an equally great chance that if I did kiss her without an apology first, she might attempt to kill me.

"Okay, time to go—we're late!" said Beth, turning around to urge the inhabitants of the room into motion.

Part of me was slightly curious as to what they were supposedly late for, but I didn't ask.

"Gawd, you're all such party-poopers! I just want some good pics to remember this by!" her crazy friend whined.

"You already got a photo of Raj in his boxers," said Beth, pushing her away from the door.

Raj? Wasn't that…? Suddenly another guy appeared in the doorway behind me, looking totally pissed, "She what?"

Oh. That Raj. He was a pretty normal guy from how Christie described him to me, and I could see that she was pretty dead-on. My heart went out to the guy a little. He was after Beth the same way I was pursuing Christie, and was having an equally hard time of it, from how Christie described it to me. Part of me wanted to say something sappy like, 'hang in there, it'll get better,' but at the moment, I didn't think I was really qualified to give anyone dating advice.

All at once, there was a mad scramble for the door as Beth carried a dozen things in her hands, Raj attempted to help her, but was rejected, and the crazy one's friend (I suppose I should say Monica's friend now since I finally learned her name), was yelling at her to get a move on. I shifted the coffee and bagel in my hand so it wouldn't be toppled. Then, they were gone… all except for Christie. I caught the door and heard Monica ask Beth if it was okay to leave me and Christie alone. I paused.

"Yeah. Believe it or not, he's one of the good guys."

I pulled open the door and stepped inside. Was I missing something? Did Christie not totally hate me, or did Beth just see how hard I was trying? I shrugged it off and walked over to Christie's bed, sitting at the foot of it. Before I could think of a plan to wake up little miss sunshine, she stirred. Pulling the blankets in around her, she glared at me with eyes half open

"I will kill them."

Maybe food would help. I held out my hand, with the coffee and bagel. Immediately her eyes lit up.

"Coffee! And a cinnamon bagel?"

She couldn't say I never paid attention. I knew what breakfast she liked at least. Then almost instantly, she yanked the food out of my hands and went back to glaring at me.

"I'm still angry at you!"

This wasn't going to be as easy as I pictured it in my head.

"Okay," I said quietly, getting up from the bed. It hurt too much to play the game of crappy comments back and forth right now. "I'll wait in the hall."

I opened the door and walked into the hallway. She would come out when she was ready to talk. Whatever it took, I wouldn't let her run away from me again.

And so I leaned against the wall, half-squatting for almost thirty minutes until I heard the lock click on her door. No sunglasses. No games. It was just me and her. When she stopped and looked at me, I half thought she was going to walk away without saying a word, but she didn't. Instead, she walked over to me, turned around and sat down right in front of me. It took my mind a second to realize what had just happened. Slowly, I reach out towards her her. My arms shook. Was this really okay? Slowly, and gently, I folded them around her. It felt so good to touch her, and hold her after all the insanity from the day before. I wanted it to last for an eternity, but we desperately needed to talk and she knew it.

"… Remember when we first met? Two years ago?"

How could I forget? I leaned the side of my head against hers, holding her just a little tighter, "You bumped into me. You were crying."

"Because my then-boyfriend said something that hurt me very much."

Wheels in my head started turning and something clicked.

"And you said: 'If he loves you, he shouldn't do things that hurt you.' And I know, I know you don't mean to hurt me. But you do."

And what about when I have to jump through a dozen hoops to get her to just say 'I forgive you' every time? Didn't she think that hurt me too?

"I warned you. I'm not a nice person."

She suddenly tried to pull away, struggling, but I held her to me with all I had. My heart throbbed painfully when she started to cry. I did this.

"…Is that your reason? Or your excuse?"

Who knows. I couldn't tell you. It's just the way I am.

Christie sniffled for several more minutes before taking a deep breath, wiping her eyes and giving me a sheepish smile.

"Come on, let me go," she said, starting to pick up her natural sarcasm again, "I won't run away, I promise."

Relief started trickling through me as she looked at me with a light grin, "Too late for that now. Tell you what, buy me a hot chocolate and cake at the café downstairs and we'll call it ev—"

I leaned to the side, easing her chin towards me and captured her lips. So close. I had come so close to losing her over something so incredibly stupid. Her flexible little tongue danced around my own and she relaxed. After maybe a minute or so I leaned away from her and our lips broke away from each other. Relief swept over me and feeling found its way back into my numb and nervous limps. Resting my forehead against her hair, I smiled.

"… Um, okay. Yeah… Let's do better today," she said, blushing.

"Deal. Think the café is open this early?"


The morning went by smoothly. We stopped by my room to get my school bag so I could hold her hand while keeping all the weird stuff we both acquired safe from our own crooked personalities… I mean. It was to hold all the neat stuff that she ended up buying. Yeah.

Just after lunch, she piped up again, "Okay, out with it. What's the problem today? You've barely said one word to me."

She bent down to try and look at my face, "Just so you're clear—we did make up."

She swung around and stopped in front of me so fast that I had to take a step back to keep from running into her.

"Weeeeell?"

"…I'm trying to mend my ways and think of something nice to say."

She started giggling uncontrollably, and I could feel a shiver creeping up my spine.

"I thought I heard a train wreck. How's the thinking of nice things going for you?"

I hadn't said much for the past three hours, how did she think it was going?

"It's exhausting."

The things I do for her.

"Yeah, takes zero effort to be an ass, doesn't it?"

Old habits die hard, honey, "Yes, well. I don't want to brag, but when you've got the skills…"

She chuckled, "You're unbelievable. Will we ever have a conversation that doesn't go thermo-nuclear?"

New word of hers?

"Sure."

I'm working on it, "Might take a while though."

"I'm sticking around until then. You?" I swear I just saw two dudes in my brain do a chest bump.

"We'll see."

Wha? Help me out her, Christie. That was gold.

"…You were supposed to say, 'yes.'"

"Was I? Must've missed the memo."

Come on! Really? I worked hard for that. Women…

"You said we made up."

"Yes, but you've yet to say something nice to me. Feel free to start with my costume."

I just did say something nice. I said you were worth sticking around for. Fine. You know what…

"…'A' for effort?"

"'F' for yours! Try harder!"

Dammit, Christie, "You…!"

She was taking her power a little too far. I reached for the closest part of her, which happened to be the bow on her costume, "Hey, hold up a second."

And… the bow ripped right off. Oh. Crap.


Christie yelled and cried all the way to the booth. Thankfully, Sandra was there. She has a way with calming Christie like I have never been able to master. Maybe it was the united 'men are stupid' attitude that she propelled towards the red head. But either way, the problem was solved as soon as we reached her.

"There, there now," Sandra said, hugging a sobbing Christie as I stood nearby. "Don't worry. Nothing some thread and needle can't fix."

I looked at the bow, 'I bet it wasn't sewed on properly, that's why…'

"So he's been a meanie today again, hasn't he?"

I looked back at them. Anything but, if you ask me.

"The boy's got the subtlety of a brick to the head, I do apologize," said Sandra.

Did she think I couldn't hear? "I'm standing right here, you know."

"Well at least he's been trying," Christine chimed in, "though I fear he may rupture a blood vessel or something for the strain."

Don't you know it, "…Still standing right here. Just FYI."

"Well if he doesn't behave, you just let me know and I'll beat him up," Sandra told Christie happily. "He doesn't hit girls, so I'd totally win."

I snorted, trying to choke down laughter. She would be utterly astonished if she knew just how much I was behaving today.

"Deal!" said Christie. "…Oh hey, Matt said you made a costume for him again, do you have it here?"

Don't do it.

"Oh, yes… the costume."

"Aw for crying out loud," I said turning my back to her.

Three… two… one…

Sandra turned on the water works full force.

"I am not wearing it."

And Christie was totally taken in.

"Nice performance, too bad no one's buying," part of me… a very tiny part was kind of concerned, "you're not really crying are you?"

Too late.

"You are a stubborn ass!"

Thanks, I live to disappoint.

"You know how long it took me to make that?"

"Two days before the con. After I said I'm not cosplaying," I shot back calmly.

"Details Shmetails."

Uh huh.

Sandra turned to Christie, "Do you want him to cosplay?"

"Yeah!"

"See, Matt? Do it for your girl!"

"No way in hell."

Wait. What? I looked around to see Christie starting to turn on the tears. Uh oh. Not good.

"I-I mean, uh."

"H-He…He did it for Emily, Didn't he?" Christie said dejectedly.

"Totally… We're… We're chopped liver to him," Sandra sobbed, playing along.

This had to be punishment for something, right?

"Fine, I'll wear it."

The two girls turned around, about ready to celebrate.

"But," there was no way I was going to be the only one getting the bum side of this deal.

"…only if she wears that thing you brought for her," I told Sandra.

Christie looked bewildered and Sandra lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Extortion—two can play that game."

"…Hey, what?"

Sandra twirled around the booth, "I got the best end of this deal ever."

Christie continued to tug on my sleeves, "Quit smirking like that! What thing?"

I chuckled, "You'll see."


Christie insisted that we could use her room to change so I didn't fight it. It was perhaps not the most logical choice for me due to the fact that it was regularly populated by around three of her female friends, but if Raj could do it, so could I. Christie wanted to use the bathroom to change in, so I was left with the main area.

Sporting a pair of black-checkered boxers, I quickly slipped into the pants Sandra had made.

"Wow," I heard Christie call through the bathroom door. "This is gorgeous. How did she learn to make these so well? Can barely see the seams…"

Now she knew why I said what I did about her own sewing disaster, "Self-taught, can you believe it? Costuming is just something she always did."

"…So, she just made this specifically for me?" Christie called back.

And I was dying to see her in it, "Yeah. She's been waiting to dress you up for two years. Don't tell her, I said that."

"I won't. This is so well made… I feel like an amateur," said Christie sounding kind of depressed.

"Well… She was an amateur once, too. And really, what matters is whether you enjoy doing it or not. And not what cosplay snobs like me think."

"My my my, now that sounded an awful lot like an apology!"

It actually wasn't, but I'd take small victories, "…Maybe. It's also the tru—"

I tripped headlong into someone suitcase and ended up sprawled on the floor. Ow…

"What was that? Are you all right?"

I leaned back, propping myself against the bed. Maybe just sitting here for a minute would be a good idea, "…Fine. This room's an obstacle course. Someone's suitcase is no longer upright, just FYI."

"Oh, it's probably Monica's. She's so messy," Christie called back.

Given, Monica did seem the type, but it definitely wasn't her suitcase that just spilled its contents on the floor.

"It may interest you to know that Monica wears pink underwear that says 'Christie,'" I teased. Part of me… just a small part… had to imagine a situation in which Monica would be required to wear just such a thing. "It also has little stars and hearts around it."

I paused, "Anything I should know about?"

Christie launched out of the bathroom like a rocket, "AUGH! THAT'S MY SUITCASE!"

She immediately started cramming everything back into the bag, "Don't go through my things!"

I leaned back defensively, "I didn't touch anything."

I could hear her muttering and cursing under her breath. It was kinda cute. It kinda… turned me on. I turned my head to look at her, but was immediately distracted.

Her… her bra was showing. I looked away, trying to focus on something else. I shouldn't look. But I… I bent down and kissed her shoulder. Her skin was so soft, and she smelled nice too. I straightened up and was face to face with her. I honestly didn't mean to start anything. It just… It just happened.

Before I realized what was going on, I was pulling her towards me and she was running her hand up my leg. Her touch sent shivers through my body as our mouths connected. And I was gone. My body burned underneath her touch and my emotions exploded violently, touching every inch of her that wasn't covered with Sandra's dress. I desperately wanted to take the damn thing off her. And as her fingers worked their way underneath my shirt I realized that she wanted the same. She broke off briefly and I found myself having to catch my breath.

One look from her and we were lip to lip once again. Her fingers tore back my shirt and mine slipped in between the cracks of her open dress. She broke off, leaning into my chest and making her way slowly and steadily down my jaw to my neck, kissing me all along the way. Electricity formed where her lips touched, driving my crazy. I held her to me as she continued to kiss my neck. Then there was a clicking sound and slow fizzing as the door scraped slowly along the carpet. Christie looked up and we both saw Beth. Christie freaked out.

"Um! This is not what it looks like!" She stammered, pulling the laces on my shirt frantically back together, ignoring the state of her own dress.

Mm… it sure as hell was exactly what it looked like, but I wouldn't tell if Christie didn't. Beth turned around without a word and let the door close.

"Beth?" Christie asked.

I frowned. Something wasn't quite right. Whatever happened would take some explaining. To bad Raj wasn't here. Oh well, bring it on…


Hey everyone! This chapter was kind of fun to write. Anyways, finals are finally over, so I'm going to get some sleep. As always, thanks for reading, and don't forget to let me know what you think.