A/N: Yes. I went there. Sorry for Typos and the like.

Kiss Me, My Pretty
Part One

It could be heard down the hall, echoing up the walls and even seeping through the cracks beneath the doors to people's bedrooms. The sound was a strange one. It was like a searing shriek, followed by an uncomfortable grunt and the sound of lots of glass shattering. There was no shadow of a doubt the source of the sound had some from the records room, where many of the science department's projects were stored. There was no doubt that the deep shrieks had come from a younger male and with certainty, the loud angry growling came from their very own angry swordsman.

"What in the blazing blue fucks did you just do, you idiot!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. God that looks like it hurts…" A flustered voice replied to the pain-lace snarl. He hurriedly jumped to grab a towel, dropping it in cool water to ease the boiling water off the exposed skin of his fellow exorcist. He was promptly met with that exorcist's fist in his face.

"Eeeeehn…You fucking second degree burned half of my torso, you fucking….fuck," gritted the victim of another science department accident. He knew it would take just a couple hours for the damned wound to heal, but that didn't mean it hurt any less. Truthfully, he preferred being hacked up. At least the adrenaline shot to slice wounds and numbed them. Burns were excruciating for hours, especially liquid burns.

"It was an accident Kanda…I didn't even know it was there! How was I supposed to know they kept boiling water in here! Hey, quit squirming! I'm trying to help you!"

"I'm squirming because it hurts you fucking….FUUUUUUUUH."

Allen jumped back at the loud outburst, his hands immediately moving to defend from the two fists that took turns attempting to flatten his face again. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to press too hard!"

"I. will. kill….you…beansprout…ugh," Kanda threatened with all he had, but he leaned forward and focused on making the burning sensations less prominent in his mind. As much as he tried to focus, he found his thoughts completely shattered by a spot of pressure on his shoulder; right into the worst part of his burn. He twitched and grabbed the object causing him more strife.

Clutched in his hand was a small ball-like golem, glittering gold, and fluttering helplessly between his fingers. "Timcanpy….The fuck do you think you're doing….."

"Tim….don't bother BaKanda, he'll likely try to break you," Allen made to retrieve Timcanpy, but the little golden golem fluttered in what could only be assumed to be…protest? "Tim?"

Kanda released his hold on the stupid damn thing and it fluttered straight back at him, nesting affectionately into his hair. If the dark haired man ever felt angry towards a damn golem, it was at that particular moment. "Beansprout, what the fuck is your retard pet doing?"

"…I…I don't know…Tim…" Allen had to circle around Kanda a few times before he was able to see the backside of his golem. A little red stamp was place directly on the back of him. "…Tim? What is this?" He made to reach for it, but Timcanpy opened his jaws and took a bite into a finger.

"….Ow…." Allen tried to make it look like he wasn't hurt by that…physically or emotionally.

"Oh dear…That's not good at all."

That voice caused Allen to slowly turn his gaze and Kanda snapped his head like he was still on fire.

"I don't like the sound of that."

"What's not good at all, you bastard!"

"This stamp is from one of our old experiments. Dear me, Tim must have fallen into it when you punched him across the room when the water fell on you."

"I punched him?" Kanda asked curiously, turning his head a bit.

"That's what that god awful shriek was."

"…Okay, so what is this thing on Tim? And how can I get if off of him," Allen asked, leaning close and trying to inspect the state of the mark without being bitten.

"Well, originally, it was supposed to be a patch that would release agents through the skin to clear stress and balance hormone levels to make workers happier, but it had a few side effects."

"Side effects?" Both exorcists spoke in deadpan unison. They seemed completely unaware of the frequency at which they did that, but it wasn't Komui's place to be amused at that particular moment…even if he was just a little.

"Well…It had a strange…infatuation side effect."

"Explain." The sharp end of a sword pressed very close to Komui's neck and Allen had to try and wrench Kanda away from lopping the scientist's head clean off.

Crossing his arms in contemplation, Komui considered the best way to relay the information and still be alive enough to escape the room. Failing at a 'best scenario', he simply sighed to answer, "It caused the user to fall in love with the first thing it saw after being affected."

A long, mind shattering silence fell over the occupants of the room.

A twitch started to make presence over Kanda's right eye when the information sunk in. Taking into consideration that Timcanpy was biting Allen, while perched on his head… "Oh…hell…no. This isn't going to work for me." He was trying so hard not to breathe fire with the rage in him that was boiling hotter than what gave him the burns that caused this.

"How long will it take for it to wear off?"

"About that, all you have to do is show it affection in return. It makes the user happy, and the seal disappears. He'll follow you around everywhere until you do."

Kanda's eyes narrowed until he felt the muscles in his head protest. He grabbed the damned thing from his hair and squeezed it in his hand, threatening to break it. "You'll find another way to fix this."

"I can try, but I really don't know what we can do immediately. I'll have to search for the notes on that one."

This answer…it displeased the angry Japanese man and he released Timcanpy, who floated in place. With the swiftest punch anyone in that room had ever seen, Kanda's fist cracked into Tim and sent the golem flying directly into Komui's face. "Fix this now," his voice leaked a venom that threatened to kill everything that heard the sultry tones. Without waiting for any responses, he turns on his heel and exited the room. The door slammed so hard that books fell out of the shelf nearby.

A little flutter of movement was seen before dissolved himself under the door, following after Kanda.

"Please…do something, Komui…" Allen pleaded with those doe eyes of his. "I kinda….like Tim…"

"I'll try Allen. He can reform himself, so Kanda can't really break hi—" His words were cut off when a bullet-like projectile of Timcanpy slammed through the wood of the door and imbedded into the bookshelf just next to his face. "…I'll get right on that."

To Be Continued…


A/N: A little bit of side fun for those waiting on my other story. Hints of Yullen be present at some point. It'll be a shorter piece.