Once upon a time the sea was comforting.

He laughed humorlessly.

But that was a long while ago, things were very different now, and he wasn't visiting the beach on vacation with his family. No, No he had no family now except for dear little Sasuke, and his little brother hardly wanted anything to do with him anymore.

After all he was a killer now (but weren't all shinobi?) and eight year olds hardly wanted anything to do with people of that sorts.

So he supposed this was what it was like to a missing-nin. It meant that he could never go home without it being a death warrant. It meant that people would recognize him and shoot him dirty looks for worse be afraid of him. (Just like Sasuke)

Funny it had only been a few months and yet it felt like years.

It had been the right choice he was sure of that but at the same time it had been the wrong one (he felt dirty), his family had been corrupt seeking power and angry at everything and everyone. They had been dangerous to Kohana and the whole shinobi world.

And yet, had they truly needed to order the children killed as well? There had been children younger than Sasuke was dear god, they were innocent, and just by baring his cursed last name they had earned a death warrant by the hands of him and Madara.

How was that right? How could he justify that?

He couldn't and he knew it.

It was during these moments when the sea spray peppered his face and hair, and he felt the farthest away from green, green forests, that he truly hated them. His fucked up family that couldn't be happy with what they had, and those cursed elders.

His family for causing their own downfall (why did it have to be him?), and the elders for ordering him to slaughter his family like pigs with smirks that said 'you brought this on yourself' (have they no heart in their chests?).

It wasn't that they had no hearts (they must care for something too) he decided, but that they didn't care for him (or Sasuke for the matter) or his family and they were as angry as his family had been.

Itachi sighed. He may not be able to return home, but he wasn't going to lie down and die and let them win (they had wanted him dead as well hadn't they?) he would protect the leaf indefinitely.

He also decided that if anything good came out of this (and he doubted that) it was that the elders could no longer control him. They could not dictate his next actions.

First things first he would have to contact the Hokage and find a way to deliver information to him. The next thing he found disgusting but necessary. He would join the Akatsuki (a pipe dream of Madara) and try to dismantle it from the inside.

After all Madara wanted the leaf to burn.

And Itachi would not condone that, He had done enough damage, he would not allow Madara to further the damage. The leaf would be safe as long as he was alive.

As would be Sasuke.

Itachi turned his face to the full harvest moon (funny he hadn't remembered when morning had turned to afternoon and afternoon to night) he could still feel the sea breeze and taste the salt and hear the crashing of the turbulent sea.

But it didn't sting quite as bad.

He wonders if this is what healing feels like.


A/N this is part of my Itachi project on DeviantArt. It's short but i didn't want to add needless fat either.

Peace out and may the force be with you,