She's A Mastermind

Fandom: The Losers

Pairing: Pooch/Jolene

Rating: PG

Warnings: schmoop

Archive: Ask

Author: Lily Zen


Notes: For fic_promptly. The Losers, Pooch/Jolene, he'll deny it to his dying day, but the truth is Jolene romanced him.

Disclaimer: Not mine.


Nobody knows it now looking at him, but he used to be pretty wild back in his day. Pooch got his nickname because back in the 'hood he was kind of a dog, chasing after whatever pretty little skirt would give him the time of day. The ones he liked the best were the ones who ignored him or gave him the cold shoulder.

No one's shoulder was quite as sub-arctic as Jolene's. She did haughty frigidity better than anybody, always with her nose up in the air or in a book, and if she wasn't doing that, then she was looking straight down it at him.

Lin's mom always used to say mean things about Jolene, about how she was stuck up and thought she was better than everybody else. Lots of people back in the old neighborhood did. The thing was…Jolene was going places. She wasn't going to be one of those dumb bitches who got knocked up right out of high school. Jolene was getting out of the ghetto no matter what, and so she worked hard and studied hard and didn't pay any mind to anyone unless it was related to her job or her schoolwork.

Pooch kind of admired that about her. He wished he'd had direction, but the sad fact was that his dad was a hoodrat and Pooch had lived his life with everybody telling him that he was a no-good hoodrat, and he believed them when they said that he wasn't anything of consequence or worth.

It wasn't until his friends started dying and going to jail that he started rethinking that. He wasn't fond of the idea that maybe he'd wind up with a slug in his gut someday, or rotting away in jail because his stupid friends wanted to rob a convenience store for pocket cash. It was for that reason that Lin went and signed up for the Army. At least then he'd be getting paid to die.

Jolene was in his Basic class. He was relieved to see somebody he knew, and so yeah, they talked a lot. He was still The Pooch though, and went out with lots of ladies. That was until he started noticing a dwindling in the number of women willing to go out with him, and as a result he made himself more available to Jolene to hang out with. It was cool, nice and platonic at first. They'd go to the movies or catch a local game if they could. Once she dragged him to a local theater company's production of A Midsummer Night's Dream, and yeah, okay, that was actually pretty good, he had to admit.

It didn't occur to him that maybe Jolene was the reason none of the other girls wanted to go out with anymore. He found out years later that she quietly put the word out that Linwood Porteous was property of Jolene Williams, and if anybody had a problem with it she'd happily bust out the Vaseline and take off her earrings to throw down 'hood-style. He laughed until he could barely breathe, then he cupped her cheek and said sincerely, "Thank you, baby."

So it turned out that he wasn't really the one to chase after Jolene. His woman, his devious, clever, beautiful, funny, amazing woman had created a most convoluted plan to subtly trap him in a web made of warm, fluffy down and snuggly boobs that smelled of vanilla and lavender, whose laugh sounded like sunshine as it refracted in a drop of water, momentarily painting a rainbow in thin air.

Before he knew it, he was a one-woman man, and they were growing up together, growing older together, and getting out of the 'hood. They created a new life for themselves that had nothing of the previous ugliness. They worked hard for it, and struggled, and sometimes they fought. When Jolene finished her contract and left the service, taking her G.I. bill and using it to put herself through college, and Pooch stayed, went career with it because he wanted to provide for her and for the family he wanted them to have, that was tough. They spent more time apart than they did together, and it was a strain for the both of them. Somehow they pulled through it though, and got married, and they keep fighting for what they have every day of their lives.

And sometimes when Pooch comes home on leave, Jolene's got his favorite dinner already smelling up the house, and A Midsummer Night's Dream is cued up on the TV (which he'll deny is one of his favorite movies, even though it totally is), and she rubs his shoulders while they cuddle on the couch together, Pooch is reminded that is wife is a mastermind, especially when she leans in close, nips his earlobe and purrs, "Baby, can you clean the gutters tomorrow?"

-FIN-