Eeek, sorry for the delay.
Here's the final chapter. There may be an epilogue at some point. We'll see.
Just wanna share that my bestie took me out for my birthday yesterday, and it was a surprise day of fun that was Big Bang Theory themed. AND IT WAS AMAZING. First, he gave me a tiara (because regardless of how big a Shenny fan I am, Amy's reaction to getting the tiara was freaking GOLD and never fails to crack me up. ) and then we went to get oatmeal, but instead he made me eat french toast, then we went to Disneyland and rode Space Mountain and avoided Goofey. Then we went to lunch at the Studio City Carney's, and then spent some time at Travel Town Train Museum (which was actually pretty cool). Then we went to Griffith Park Observatory, then on down to Pasadena, where we went to Cal Tec, visited Los Robles and Euclid Ave, and then had dinner at the Pasadena Cheesecake Factory where I ordered the BBQ Bacon Cheeseburger and lemonade. Yeah... my bestie is pretty dang awesome.
I don't own TBBT, but I own Alex.
Snoogans and Snoochie Boochies!
Penny was napping. They'd been home from the hospital for two days now. Alex had started to cry, and Sheldon let Penny sleep. Genus didn't even begin to describe Sheldon. So letting Penny sleep while he figured out what Alex needed didn't seem like it'd be that hard.
Sheldon walked in to the nursery and leaned over the edge of the crib. His son wailed, his tiny body shaking with the force of his cry.
"What's wrong?" Penny asked sleepily from the doorway.
"That is what I am currently trying to ascertain, although, judging from the smell, it appears that he requires a change of diaper." Sheldon said, still peering down at his son.
Penny, without saying another word, made her way over to the crib and lifted Alex. She smelled what the problem was as well, but it didn't seem to bother her like it had bothered Sheldon. At least, if it did, she wasn't letting on. If she could do it, so could he.
"Here, let me." he told her, reaching out his arms for Alex. She smiled and handed him over. "You may return to your nap if you like." he said, and she nodded, but stayed in the nursery anyway, watching as Sheldon lowered Alex to the changing table.
He made quick work of unbuttoning the little jammies Alex was wearing, and lifting them so the bottom half of Alex was only covered by his diaper. Alex in the mean time, had nearly stopped crying, and was now just whimpering every now and then.
Penny stood back and watched as Sheldon took the tabs on either side of the diaper and pulled them apart, then peeled back the front to reveal the present Alex had left for his parents.
Sheldon thought the smell had been horrendous while the diaper and jammies were still on. Now that the diaper was open…
"Oh good Lord!" Sheldon squealed, and then dry heaved. Penny doubled over in a fit of laughter. "Penny, I.." -gag- "I don't think…" -gag- "I can't do this. I require your assistance."
Penny, still laughing, came up next to Sheldon, and opened the container of wipes, pulling two from the package, and handing them to him.
Sheldon looked at her as if she'd gone completely insane. "Have you gone completely insane? You don't expect me to do this?" he said. It really hadn't seemed that hard to Sheldon. If Penny could do it, if mothers and fathers all over the world could do it, some with less than he had here in the nursery, surely he could change his child's diaper.
But the mess, the germs, the fecal matter, the urine… it was to much. Just to much for him to handle.
"I'm not changing him by myself for the next two years. There will be times when you will have to do this yourself, because I wont be around. This is as bad as it's going to get, so once you do this, the rest is a piece of cake."
"I am one of the brightest minds of this century Penny. I can tell you how everything in the universe works…"
"Good." she interrupted him, "Then changing a diaper will be easy." she smiled, handed him the wipes, and left the nursery.
Sheldon watched her walk out, and then turned back to his son, gagging again. He made a mental note to stock the nursery and diaper bag with latex gloves and plenty of hand sanitizer, and possibly offer to pay Leonard handsomely if he'd come over and change Alex's diaper whenever Penny wasn't around.
Penny rolled over in bed, waking on her own in the middle of the night. Perhaps it was some sort of mothering mechanism that woke her. Her body realizing that she hadn't woken at all to tend to Alex that night. She noticed right away she was alone in bed. She got up and as she was about to head to the nursery when she noticed a light on in the living room.
When she got to the end of the hall, a soft smile spread across her face. She ran back to the bedroom and grabbed her camera, and then walked as quietly as possible back to the living room.
Sheldon woke to the camera flash, jumping slightly, but remembering quickly where he was, and that he was holding Alex, so he caught himself before he said anything that might disturb his sleeping son.
Penny smiled down at him, and then took a seat to Sheldon's left, something that felt weird for both of them the second that she did it, but he sat up a little straighter and she scooted up next to him silently. She pressed the button on her camera to bring up the photos, and as soon as Sheldon saw it, he frowned, and shot a slight death glare at Penny while she fought to hold back a serious case of the giggles.
In the picture, Sheldon was sleeping, sitting on the far cushion of the couch opposite his normal spot, holding Alex over his shoulder. Both her boys sleeping soundly.
Leonard knocked twice on the door to 4A before entering. "Hey guys! Dinner's here!" he said as he made his way in. He looked up to see Sheldon at his white board, wearing a 'baby bjorn', little Alex perched in it, facing the white board as Sheldon wrote, explaining to Alex all the things he was writing.
Bernadette and Amy had taken Penny out for a much needed girls day. The four boys were left alone for the first time with Alex.
"Wee!" Raj said as he tossed little Alex up in the air, causing Alex to erupt into a fit of giggles as Raj caught him. "Wee!" he said, doing it again.
"Raj, I would appreciate you not manhandling my child." Sheldon said as he came out of the bathroom.
"I'm not manhandling him. He's having fun. Aren't you Alex? Yes you are! Wee!" he said, tossing Alex back into the air.
"If Penny saw you doing this, well, a good southern gentlemen such as myself doesn't speak about what I can only imagine she'd do to you." Sheldon said, reaching the living room, and holding his arms out for Alex. Raj sighed and handed the baby over.
"Just try it. He likes it. Didn't you hear him laughing?" Raj asked.
Sheldon had heard Alex laughing. It certainly wasn't his first laugh, but Sheldon found it had become one of his favorite sounds, and the way Raj had gotten him giggling, Sheldon did want to hear it again. And this time, he wanted to be the one causing the laughter.
Sheldon smiled at Alex, and then, mimicking what Raj had done, gently tossed Alex in the air. Only this time, Alex didn't giggle.
A collective "Oooohhhh!" was heard in 4A, as Alex came back down into Sheldon's arms, and promptly spit up on him. Sheldon, who'd been smiling and saying "Wee!" just as Raj had done, was motionless and speechless, afraid to move.
"So then, just as he's coming back down, he totally barfed all over Sheldon." Howard told Penny. Raj and Leonard laughing as Leonard held Alex.
"Oh gross!" Penny said, and her and Bernadette and Amy all giggled.
"So he's been in the bathroom ever since." Leonard said. "You might want to go easy on him tonight. It's really been a rough day for him."
"Why didn't he just take a shower and change his clothes?" Bernadette asked.
"Well, you see, when Alex… got sick, Sheldon sort of… well, he… he had his mouth open, and some of it… yeah." Leonard said, gagging slightly and laughing at the same time.
The look of horror that crossed over the girls faces was only offset by the giggles that suddenly erupted from little Alex, still perched in Leonard's arms.
Penny stood next to Sheldon as he changed Alex's diaper.
"So then she tells me that they're looking to sell fast, so it's way under market price. And I know we talked about getting a house in a few years, but it was so nice, and had room to grow and I think that if we really worked hard at it we could totally afford it and…" Penny was saying.
Sheldon was only half listening to her. He was more concentrated on making sure Alex didn't pee on him. He'd been warned it would happen. But Sheldon was determined to not let that happen. Especially after the throw up incident.
"…so I know we were going to go together when we started looking, but we were in the neighborhood and the people were home, and they agreed to let Bernadette bring me over and show me around. Anyway, it was beautiful. And I may have told them that we wanted to buy it…"
Sheldon's attention went to Penny. "Penny, we discussed this. While we are financially stable without your income, I don't believe either of us are currently prepared for the duties of home ownership. We have no idea now when Alex's two other siblings will arrive. I would like for us to build up a… 'nest egg' if you will, before making any large fin…" Sheldon was saying, but stopped when he noticed Penny starting to giggle. He noticed she was no longer watching him, but was now looking down at Alex. Sheldon turned his attention back to his son.
And just managed to catch the tail end of Alex peeing on him.