A Slight Parody of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Chapter 12: The Ployjuice Potion

Part 6: The End

Author's Note/Disclaimer: Final chapter! Or part, or whatever. i had a lot of fun writing this, and if you haven't read my other stories (which is about one of you), you should! Kay, bye!
I don't own Harry Potter.

Harry, Ron, and Malfoy walked into the Slytherin second year boys' dorm. Malfoy immediately jumped on a large and very comfortable-looking bed. A little too comfortable, Harry thought . And girly.

The bed was covered in huge fluffy stuffed animals of varying shades of pink and purple. As Malfoy jumped in, rose petals flew everywhere.

Harry and Ron stared at each other, bewildered. If only Collin was here with his camera.

When Malfoy finnnally settled in, he asked them, "Well? Aren't you gonna read me a bedtime story?"

Harry and Ron looked at each other bewildred again. Wait 'till Hermione found out about this.

Harry grabbed a book that was sitting on Malfoy's bedside table and began to read.

"Once upon a time there was a little fairy princess," he said in Goyle's gruff voice.

And so, as Harry proceeded to read about the fairy princess wandering through the mushroon forest, Ron decided to look for their beds. Hopefully they weren't as embarrassing.

Ron spotted them immediately, as hey were the only two beds that were covered in heart-shaped pictures of Malfoy.

"Um, Harry? I mean Goyle?" whispered Ron.

Harry didn't stop reading but nodded to show he wass listening. Malfoy shivered as Harry told about the fairy princess getting attacked by a ferocious mouse.

"Look towards our beds," whispered Ron.

Harry turned in his chair but continued reading about the fairy princess producing a wheel of cheese to distract the mouse.

Harry glanced up and dropped the book from shock, but fortunately Malfoy was already snoring peacefully.

"Merlin's beard," swore Harry. "They're got it bad."

Ron nodded. "I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight with all those Malfoys watching me with their beady little eyes."

Harry agreed. "Maybe we can sneak back to Myrtle's bathroom and sleep there."

"Great, let's hurry," said Ron.

They ran off down the stairs but then they saw the common room still filled with Slytherins.

Ron cursed. "How are we gonna get past them? It'll look strange if Crabbe and Goyle are walking around without Malfoy."

Just to prove his point, Pansy Parkington walked up to them and said, "Crabbe, Goyle, what are you guys doing walking around without Malfoy?"

"Um… Uh…," stammered Ron.

"We need to get Draco his allergy pills," said Harry, thinking fast. "He left them in the Great Hall."

"Oh," said Pansy. "I didn't know Draco had allergies."

"There's a lot you don't know about Draco," said Ron, slowly creeping towards the exit. "For example, he has allergies."

Then Harry and Ron ran out of there before she could figure out what was wrong.

When Harry and Ron got to Myrtle's bathroom, they found Myrtle laughing hysterically.

"What's so funny?" asked Ron.

"Nothing," said Myrtle, the jumped into her toilet, splashing water everywhere.

"Hermione?" called Harry.

"Hermione?" called Ron.

"!" laughed Myrtle.

And that's pretty much how they spent the rest of the night.


The next day, Professor McGonagal opened the front doors to find Hermione sprawled on the floor, dirty, smelly, and wearing rags.

"Why, Ms. Granger, what happened?" asked McGonagal, helping her up.

"Woke up…," mumbled Hermione. "Middle of the forest… surrounded by cats… Almost got killed… by a dog… Strange craving… for mice… Horrible… Horrible!"

"Oh my," said McGonogal. She's obviously suffering some sort of mental disease. "Let's get you to Madam Pomfrey, shall we?"

Along the way, she passed by a closet door that had some strange sounds coming from it. She opened it and Crabbe and Goyle stumbled out.

"Thanks, Professor MacGonagal," said Crabbe.

"We woke up in there," said Goyle. "No memory of what happened…"

"Well, get to your common rooms," said Proffessor McGonagal, and continued guiding Hermione to the infirmary as they walked off towards the dungeons.

Then she saw some brown things on the floor that looked like shredded pieces of paper. Peeves, was the first thought that came into her mind. Oh well, Filch will clean it up.

She continued walking until she passed Harry and Ron, looking disgrulted, their robes in tatters, wearing shoes way too big for them, and smelling like they'd slept in a bathroom.

"Why, boys," she said. "You look awful! And don't even get me started on the smell!"

"Hermione," said Ron. "We were looking for you all night. Where were you?"

"Ugh," said Hermione. "You threw me out the window!"

Wow, thought McGonagal. Everyone seems to be suffering a mental illness today.