A/N: Well. This was a fill for the Kink Meme and I totally gave up on even trying to operate that thing so. The request was:

Finland and Sweden watch a documentary about Vikings, and Finland gets hot and bothered thinking of Sweden doing manly things in viking era clothes. So they decide to have role play sex where Sweden is a Viking and Finland is a young Finn who met him and caught his eye.


* Finland hilariously exclaims: "Pillage me harder."
* Sweden actually puts on a historically accurate costume.

I'm still unsure about how I feel about this. Don't take me wrong, I like it really. I find it funny and I give myself a pat on the back for writing it. I can't help but feel as though it's weird for a reason. Either way reviews are more than welcome and I bid you a good day and happy readings.

C'mon Berwald! It's about to start." Tino adjusted himself comfortably on the couch while he waited for Berwald to bring in the popcorn. For as long as Tino cared to remember he and the Swede always settled down together at the end of a long Friday and watched a documentary together (they always liked to expand their knowledge whenever possible). This documentary just so happened to be about something they both had a vast knowledge on- Vikings. Yes that's right, Vikings. Scandinavian history was filled with the lot, so it was kind of redundant for them to be watching it. Though they hadn't missed a Friday night documentary in many years, why miss one now?

"I'm here don't worry Tino." Berwald sat himself down on the couch, fairly close to the Finn, and sat the overflowing bowl of popcorn on the table. Tino shuffled closer to the Swede, resting his head lazily on Berwald's chest as a strong arm wrapped itself around him tightly. The documentary started just like any other; lot's of talking, some reenactments and some interesting artifacts from that time period, but there was something that caught Tino's eye. In one of the reenactments there was a very tall and muscular Viking. Of course it wouldn't of mattered much, but something about the man reminded Tino of Berwald. Maybe it was the way his muscles moved under his tunic, showing his sheer strength, or the way he was presented as a stoic and intimidating fighter. Whatever it happened to be Tino couldn't take his eyes off the Viking, and…oh great his mind was determined to screw him over as images of Berwald in that Viking's place flooded his mind. Tino groaned softly when it became painfully aware that his dirty mind was having adverse effects on him, and the growing tent in his pajama pants. "Are you okay, m'wife?" Berwald glanced down at Tino, who was now quickly averting eyes and blushing furiously. "I'm fine! I'm fine! It's just….is it getting hot in here?" The Finn let out a high pitched nervous laugh and coughed, covering up a moan when the Viking ripped his tunic off. "And I'm not your wife."

"Do you want the blanket off?" Berwald made a move to pull the blanket off of them. Tino, however grabbed the blanket and with a vice grip he held on. "Nonononono! I'm fine! I like the blanket, Berwald." The Swede shook his head and reached for the blanket again.

"You're getting really pale, Tino. You shouldn't have the blanket on." Grabbing the blanket, Berwald pulled against Tino's grip. The two struggled against each other until the Berwald accidentally brushed a hand over the bulge in the Finn's pants. Tino scrambled quickly to the other end of the couch, pulling up his knees close to his chest.

"Tino…are you.." Berwald pointed a finger down to the Finn's crotch, "…hard?"

"Oh Berwald, please don't be mad. I just got so worked up over how much one of those Viking's looked like you, and how amazingly hot you would look in a Viking suit and I just…" Tino whimpered in frustration, hiding his head in between his knees. "You think I would look hot dressed like a Viking?" Tino looked up tentatively at Berwald. He was wearing one of his taciturn faces, and the Finn couldn't decide whether he was put off by the face, or turned on. Stupid hormones anyway.

"I-I..um...yes." The Swede nodded slowly and extended his hand to Tino. "Well, we might as well take care of that."

It seemed like the whole "getting-hard-whilst-watching-a-documentary-about-Vikings-incident" had blown over and been forgotten about. Well, at least that's what Tino had thought. It was a whole week, to be exact, when the subject of getting all hot and bothered by the thought of Berwald in a Viking suit was brought up. Oh, but when it was…

"So, Tino you really think I'd look hot in a Viking suit?" Berwald looked inquisitively up at Tino, popping a bite of his dinner into his mouth.

Tino chocked on the sip of water he had just took. "Berwald!" The Finn coughed for a good minute. "Is this really an appropriate time to bring this up?"

"Why not? I was thinking about it so..." The Swede shrugged and took another bite of his dinner.

"I could have chocked to death y'know! And we're eating dinner. I highly doubt this is the time for such conversations." Tino wiped his mouth and picked up his dishes, heading to the kitchen.

"You're not now. Besides I only wanted to know if you'd truly find me hot in a Viking suit." Berwald tailed behind Tino, bringing his own dishes with him.

Tino placed his plate and things into the sink with a huff. "Wasn't my erection obvious proof?"

Berwald nodded and set his dishes in the sink as well. "I was just making sure." The Swede exited the kitchen when Tino started to wash the dishes.

Making sure….What was that supposed to mean? The Finn dismissed all notions of what it could have meant out of his brain as he finished washing the dishes. Once he finished cleaning up Tino headed for the living room. He plopped himself onto the couch and flipped on the TV.

"So really, you think I'd look sexy in this?" Berwald leaned himself against the doorframe and folded his arms.

"I thought we went over-" Tino looked over from the TV to where Berwald was standing. He was decked out in a well worn Viking suit and Tino couldn't have been more shocked. "-this."

Berwald strolled over to the couch. "Oh, we did. I figured I'd dress up and get your opinion."

Tino ran his hand over the tunic the Swede was wearing, delighting in the way the muscles contracted underneath his touch. "It's...wonderful."

"I'm glad you like it. Would you like to…" Berwald raised an eyebrow. It was a silent request to dive head first into a second world, and Tino would be damned if he said no.

Tino nodded his head and removed his hand from Berwald's tunic. He wasn't sure where Berwald was going with it, but he was sure he'd catch on real soon.

"I wonder what my boss would say if I told him I found a Finn in Sweden?" Berwald looked down at Tino curiously.

Tino looked up at Berwald in purely faked innocence. "I-I I'm not sure, sir."

Berwald chuckled and held his hand out. "Come with me. I don't want you getting caught."

Tino, of course took the hand as he was lead to their bedroom- or well wherever it was supposed to be.

Berwald closed the door behind them and turned back around to face Tino. He ran his fingers down the Finn's face and smiled fondly. "You're quite beautiful."

Tino blushed and turned his face away from Berwald. "Thanks." He didn't have to fake the blush- no every time The Swede complimented him his cheeks heated up and dusted themselves with pink.

"Don't be so shy." Berwald cupped Tino's face with his hand. "Can I kiss you?" The request would be unusual, under normal circumstances (Berwald never had to ask), but now they were strangers and there was a border as to what needed permission.

Tino thought it over for a minute or two before replying with a short but sweet, "yes."

Berwald leaned his head down for better access, and pressed his lips firmly to Tino's. Granted, it took a few minutes to get the Finn's lips to move against his own (strangers, remember?), but once they did start moving the game was on. Berwald's tongue licked Tino's bottom lip in hopes to get his mouth to open up for him. His mouth did just that and their tongues danced in a well know battle. Of course, the Swede won dominance easily, and set out to reacquaint himself with Tino's mouth. It was an oh-so-familiar taste, one that could only be described as sweet, earthy and Tino.

The Finn grasped for Berwald's shoulders as his tongue took over and mapped his mouth out again for what must have been the millionth time. The moan that escaped Tino's mouth could only be described as wanton. What could he say? He was pressed up against his lover, which by the way was in a fucking Viking suit, and they were making out like life depended on it. Can someone say wet dreams come true? The Finn had to break away for a breath that turned into a loud gasp when Berwald planted wet kisses down his jaw and neck. "P-please, yes please." Tino's grip on the Swede's shoulders turned vice, his nails digging in and dragging down his arms.

"Anything you want." Berwald hoisted the smaller nation up, Tino's lean legs wrapping around him for support. They made their way to the bed, Berwald carefully setting Tino down and making his way on top of him. His mouth resumed it's previous duties, sucking marks on the pale, perfect skin. "By the way," the Swede whispered hotly onto Tino's skin "my name's Berwald. You're going to want to remember to scream that out." Berwald tilted to capture Tino's mouth in a kiss that was just plain dirty. Their teeth clashed and their tongues met, it was probably too sloppy and messy, but everything about it was hot.

Hands wandered their way down Tino's shirt and underneath it, fingers splaying out to cover his torso with a touch that was electric. The fingers danced up the Finn's chest and left a trail of hot sparks in their wake. Berwald's hands pushed the shirt up above Tino's armpits, leaving the Finn to do nothing but keep his arms up and arch needily into the touches. The Swede licked a firm trail up Tino's chest, making a detour to lick over a perky nipple.

"Oh God." Tino squirmed, his hips thrusting up seeking friction. Berwald met Tino's thrusts with his own, both of them groaning low in their throat.

"Told you-" Berwald stilled Tino's hips with his hands, and paused mid thought to lick and suck on the Finn's nipples. "-the name is Berwald, not God." The Swede chuckled, kissing his way to where Tino's shirt prevented him from going further and stopped to remove it. Tino lifted himself up so the shirt removal would be easier and took the opportunity to remove the Swede's tunic. The Finn licked his lips and ran his hands over the battle scarred skin. Berwald's muscles twitched under Tino's hands, which were abruptly pinned above his head. "Can you keep them there?" The Swede's voice, barely above a whisper, rang hot in Tino's ear.

"Yes. Just touch me." A smile tugged a the corners of Berwald's lips as he let go of Tino's hands. Kisses were placed at Tino's hips and breathy moans passed through the Finn's lips. The same hands that left hot sparks on his chest were now at the waist band of his pants and boxers, pulling them down at a torturous rate. They were finally pulled off and Berwald ran his hands up Tino's thighs, spreading them for easier access. The Swedes hands worked their way down the inside of the Finn's thighs, his tongue following his left hand's path. Tino bucked into the air wanting Berwald to stop teasing and get on with it. Taking the hint, Berwald took Tino's length into his hand and stroked him once teasingly before licking a stripe up the underside. Whimpers fell from Tino's mouth as Berwald's tongue circled his head and licked wide stripes up his erection. Wanting more than just whimpers, Berwald engulfed Tino whole. The Finn moaned obscenely and willed himself to not bring his hands down and thrust into that delicious wet heat.

"Ooooh…ooh fuck. Berwald-shit shit shit." Berwald laughed around Tino's erection which sent shivers up his spine. The Finn brought his hands down instinctually to Berwald's hair and laced them in the blonde locks. He cursed himself mentally when Berwald lifted his head off his erection and moved to his lips ghosted Tino's ear.

"I thought you could keep your hands there?" Berwald licked the shell of Tino's ear and got himself up off the bed. Tino watched his every movement from the languid way he took off his pants and boxers to the way the muscles moved when he searched for the lube and condoms in their "sex drawer". Quicker than a flash Berwald was back on top of Tino, pouring lube on his fingers. The Swede swatted the Finn's thigh, "Spread your legs."

Tino hadn't realize he had shut them, but quickly readjusted himself and pulled a pillow under his hips. Berwald licked his lips and leaned down to kiss Tino hard and dirty while he trailed his lube covered finger down the Finn's balls and perineum. Tino pushed back, trying to get the process moving and was rewarded when Berwald plunged a finger into him hard. Tino cried out in a mixture of pain/pleasure, taking a moment to collect himself. Berwald placed loving chaste kisses on his face, jaw and lips as he got used to the intrusion. A small nod was all Berwald needed to continue, pulling and pushing his finger in and out stretching his lover.

"Oh lord! More." Tino gasped out as soon as Berwald crooked his finger just so, hitting his prostate. Soon one finger turned into two, which turned into three and by that point Tino was a moaning, blubbering mess fucking himself onto Berwald's fingers. "I'm…uuuuggggnn…ready. Berwald, please….please" Slowly, the Swede removed his fingers with an lewd squelch. Tino scrunched his face up and whimpered at the odd feeling of being empty.

"You sure?" Berwald stole a glance at Tino while he rolled a condom on and lubed his neglected erection. His eyes involuntarily rolling back and his head lolling back a bit.

"Yes! I need you, now." Tino steadied himself on the bed, wiggling his ass in encouragement. Berwald nodded to himself, more than to Tino, and lined himself up with the Finn's entrance. He placed a kiss to Tino's forehead and pushed in slowly, dropping his head to Tino's shoulder. He Finn bite his lip in efforts to keep his wail of pain from slipping past, before he knew it though Berwald had fully sheathed himself in him and was placing kisses on his neck. The burn wasn't nearly as intense as the first time they had sex (he started to tear up and Berwald almost pulled out, but Tino convinced him otherwise- thank God), but it was still there. He wrapped his arms around Berwald and breathed heavy in his ear, "Move...move Berwald."

"Yes sir." Berwald didn't need to be told twice and he did just that, pulling out until his head was engulfed in that tight heat and pushed back in. The drag creating wonderfully friction for them both. Berwald let out a moan into the crook of Tino's neck , repeating the process of pulling out and pushing back in. "So tight, so good."

Tino's head fell back, his mouth agape in a chocked off moan, reveling in the fact that the pain had ebbed away and pleasure was the only thing it's wake. Berwald had managed to aim perfectly, hitting Tino's prostate dead on with every thrust. "Fuck yes! God harder, pillage me harder!" Tino let out a whimper at the realization that he had just let out something that was meant to stay in his fantasies. Lucky for him though, Berwald seemed to only have heard the "harder" and complied with his wishes. The bed was creaking with each thrust, and their moans were getting increasingly louder.

"Tino…ooh Tino." Berwald's face was screwed up in concentration as he pounded into Tino. His hand trailed down to firmly grip Tino's length and pump him in time with his thrusts.

"Berwaaald" Tino arched up into Berwald and couldn't decide whether to fuck himself down onto Berwald, or fuck up into Berwald's fist. He didn't have much of a choice as his hips moved on their own accord effectively doing both. "C-close, so close."

The Swede grunted in response, thrusting harder bringing Tino to the brink of orgasm. It shouldn't of been too much of a surprise to Tino that Berwald had in fact heard him scream "pillage me harder", but the Finn was quite grateful for that fact.

"How's this for pillaging you harder?" The heated coil in the pit of Tino's stomach released as he gripped the bed sheets tight and came all over his chest and Berwald's hand. The clenching of Tino's muscles and the way Tino's face scrunched up in that way the Swede found absolutely hot, was all Berwald needed to tip over the edge, riding out his orgasm with a few short thrusts. He collapsed breathlessly on Tino and pulled out slowly, rolling to his side. Berwald pulled off the condom and tied it up throwing it in the wastebasket next to their bed and grabbing a tissue to clean Tino and himself up. He snuggled into Tino, who in turn snuggled closer.

"So was it anything like you imagined sex with a Viking would be?" Berwald laughed out, resting his head next to Tino's.

"Even better, even better." Tino smiled to himself and turned out the lamp, wanting nothing more than to fall asleep in his very own Swedish Vikings arms.