Guts

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Sometimes, Cameron just watched her.

It wasn't any big thing, really. Just sometimes, whenever Ferris would be lost in some rambling diatribe about his latest scheme or other, or when he was acting out said scheme, his eyes would wander toward Sloane. And he would wonder.

What was she doing with someone like him anyway?

She was clever. Ferris was clever, too. But she had a sort of class Cameron knew was miles above his best friend, no matter how many other good things there may have been about him. He figured Ferris knew this, too.

But honestly – though they'd been together for a while, he'd never really thought them right for each other. He'd never said this for the same reason that back in the ninth grade, Ferris had managed to ask her out first.

He just didn't have the guts.

That day they'd spent together – the best one of his life – had forged new feelings in Cameron. He now stood up to his father. He took risks he'd never before dreamed of taking. Like cutting class with Ferris (rather than just listening to his stories about it), sneaking out at night, and even asking out a handful of girls. But never her. Never Sloane.

When they'd walked together through the parade, riding the high of Ferris's having mounted the float, they'd talked. About the future, about college. But the moment was fleeting. And before long, she was back under the spell of that school-skipping daredevil, his smooth voice, his mischievous smile.

Cameron admitted it – they looked good together. They seemed to get along fine. But it made him wonder. Did Sloane really love Ferris the person? Or just the excitement that tended to come along with him?

It wasn't any of his business, really. No, it wasn't.

It was.

It wasn't.

He didn't know. He didn't have the guts to find out.

Swallowing the memory of that day and those of a thousand chances lost, Cameron turned around from where he stood on Sloane's doorstep. He kicked a soda can in frustration as he walked home in the direction of the dying Chicago sun.

––—∞—––

After re-watching the movie, this idea popped into my head, and just wouldn't go away. I could just picture Cameron fighting with himself over this.