Hello, my unbelievably patient fans! I have returned to bring you the third and final chapter of this particular fanfiction. When I first envisioned it, I thought it was a match made in heaven. 'How could no one have written this coupling yet?' Well, upon writing it, I discovered one thing: It's pretty difficult. There are only so many ways to write it without being cliche. Did I care? Not at all. I went cliche, full speed ahead. I hope that the fruits of my labor are as sweet as the sweet bubbles that the youngsters... Oops! I don't want to spoil it!
Also, I must credit the plot twist to Story Writing Guy. He said it so perfectly that it actually wrote itself into the chapter without me realizing it. He was a huge support throughout this entire ordeal.
Either way, this is the last and shortest of my chapters. The hallucinogenic Ruby has since disappeared, so I've been left to write it alone. It won't be as good without her input, but I hope you enjoy it all the same.
"Petrie, what do I dooo!" Chomper's heart was palpitating unreasonably fast. Despite his preparations, everything disappeared the instant he sighted Ruby. He looked around frantically, trying to get a hold on his emotions. He couldn't fit things together in his mind – nothing was making sense anymore. "Oh no, oh jeez, ohhh I can't do this!"
"Chomper!" Petrie was sitting on Chomper's snout, mere inches from his eyes. Chomper seemed not to notice the flier perched atop his nose. "Sorry 'bout this, Chomper!" Petrie said just before he began pecking Chomper's noggin like a prehistoric jackhammer.
This got Chomper's attention rather quickly, eliciting several 'ouches' from him. He came back to reality and plucked Petrie off his head, holding him around the midsection. "Thanks, Petrie…" he said with less sarcasm than would be expected, rubbing the spot that Petrie had chosen to abuse.
"No mention it!" Petrie flew out of Chomper's claws and hovered in front of his face. "But what matter with Chomper?" Petrie had a look of concern to him. "Chomper feeling funny 'bout Ruby again?"
Chomper nodded his head as he looked over at Ruby and Ducky, who were only about 30 feet away now. Petrie followed his gaze, but he kept his calm. "It okay, Chomper, just no cry like hatchling, okay?" He locked his gaze with the stressed tyrannosaur until he received an affirmative response. Then he touched down.
By this time, though, Ruby and Ducky were upon them, having finished a discussion of their own. Unbeknownst to Petrie and Chomper, the girls had become fairly certain of what was going on in the past few moments. More importantly, Ruby was having a mirror reaction to Chomper's.
Chomper swallowed hard and forced himself to make eye contact with Ruby. She, however, was looking at the pile of fruit and seaweed, mentally confirming her and Ducky's suspicion. She herself was trying to hide how nervous she was. She looked towards Chomper, who by now had looked away. She looked at his snout, wondering if she could actually be with him, actually kiss him…
"Hi Ducky! Hi Ruby!" Petrie said, drawing attention to himself and away from the introspective potential couple. He motioned toward the piles of greens and grapes for everyone to sit around, which they promptly did, Ducky sitting across from him and the awkward non-herbivores sat across one another. "How you two doing tonight?" he said, trying to ease up the situation.
"We are doing quite well, Petrie, yep, yep, yep!" Ducky responded happily. She shared Petrie's lack of concern – she had like him for quite some time, and it was obvious enough to everyone, herself included, that Petrie liked her as well. She had every confidence that things were going to go well before the bright circle made it back into the sky.
"…Yeah, what's good was good…" Ruby seemed to be attempting to express her usual redundancy, but it was lacking her usual philosophical air. Only Chomper missed this. Petrie and Ducky looked at each other, sharing nods that were so subtle it appeared to be a group twitch.
"Uh-oh!" Everyone looked at Petrie as he slapped his forehead. "Me forget! Petrie supposed to be helping Mama clean nest! Sorry, guys, but me have to go!" He hopped into the air and started flying off towards his home.
"Petrie, wait!" Now the eyes were moving between Ducky and Chomper, who had both shouted out at the same time. The two looked at one another with slight suspicion.
Ducky spoke up first. "I'll help you Petrie!" She turned back to Ruby. "Sorry, Ruby. You can still talk with Chomper, though, yep, yep, yep."
Petrie winked at her, but Chomper didn't notice as he began to protest. "…Petrie, you can't leave me alone with her!" he whispered through his teeth. Ruby, unfortunately, had been paying attention. She heard this, and she was not happy about it.
"Chomper!" she shouted, jumping up in anger. She clearly had forgotten what Chomper was initially up to – she had blown her fuse completely. "How can you say that! What don't you like about me!" She stormed off into the forest, tears running from her eyes.
The remaining dinos merely stood there, mouths agape. Ducky was the first to actually let words come out, though. "Ch-chomper? I think you need to apologize to Ruby, yep, yep, yep." Apparently Chomper was not as quiet as he thought.
"B-b-but I didn't mean it like that!" Chomper tried to explain himself, but the couple would have none of it. Ducky trotted up to him, then leaned up to whisper something in his ear.
Chomper's expression grew increasingly baffled. After Ducky pulled away, his face sort of stuck like that for a moment. Then, surprisingly, his face broke into the smile of an epiphany.
"Yep, yep, yep! Now go!" Ducky pointed in the direction Ruby had run, and without another word, Chomper turned tail and ran. Ducky then returned her attention to Petrie. "Now Petrie, about your nest…"
"What? Oh, yeah! Come on, Ducky!" Petrie swooped down and she grabbed onto his ankles. Then the newly formed couple flew off to some obscure place that you – the reader – do not know about. The two of them lived happily ever after. But what of Chomper and Ruby? Let us see…
Ruby was crying in her special place. She went there when she needed to be alone, and right now was definitely at the top of the list of "need to be alone" moments. She didn't hear as Chomper walked up behind her.
"What are you gonna do, Ruby?" she asked herself. "You know you like him, but he doesn't like you. And even if he did, you're supposed to take care of him! How can you like him so much without it getting weird? Oh Ruby…" Chomper just sat and listened to her, wondering what he should say to her. It was clear that no matter what happened, it was going to be a little confusing.
"Why can't you just be friends with him? Ugh, somebody HELP ME!" Ruby looked up into the night circle, then down into the valley below. She knew that Petrie and Ducky were probably together right now as a successful couple. "Why does he hate me?" At this, fresh tears started at the corners of her eyes. Chomper, who was on the verge of crying himself, couldn't stand to watch this.
"I don't hate you, Ruby." Ruby jumped out of her scales and spun around, face to face with Chomper.
"Ho-how long were you standing there?" Ruby sniffed, trying to hold back her tears.
"Since you asked yourself 'What are you gonna do?'" Chomper stepped forward. "Well, what are you gonna do?"
Ruby looked down at him. "I-I don't know what you-"
"I don't hate you, Ruby, not at all. I actually kinda…" His voice trailed off into a mumble.
"Wh-what?" Ruby had stopped crying now, but the tears were still in her eyes.
The embarrassed little tyrannosaur mustered up every bit of courage he had left in his body. "Ruby, I-I don't hate you, because I love you."
The air was still for a moment. Chomper waited for a response, but Ruby just stood there with her beak hanging off its hinge.
"Ruby?" Chomper was afraid that his confession had changed her mind.
Her eyes came back into focus. They were locked on Chomper's, but her nerves made her look away. She heard Chomper sigh, but she was still debating with herself. Should I? I need to know for sure if we're supposed to like each other…
As Ruby's eyes wandered, they came to rest on the branch of a tree. On that branch was a group of pointy leaves with little red sweet bubbles on it, but they didn't look too sweet. This was all the confirmation she needed. "Chomper…?" Chomper's head snapped up from his feet, where he had been staring. "Look." She pointed at the little plant in the tree.
Chomper did so, and his mouth – for another time in one night – dropped open. "Are those…"
Ruby looked back at him, smiled, and nodded. "M'hmm. Kissing greens." Chomper had not fully recovered from the surprise when Ruby lunged forward and kissed him, beak to maw. She felt Chomper's body tense, but it soon died off as he leaned into the kiss as well.
After an excessively long moment, they broke apart. The two dinosaurs gazed into each other's eyes, not wanting to miss a thing. At the same time, however, they spoke. It didn't really matter, because they said the same thing. "I love you." They joined in a kiss once again, and they let the rest of the world melt away. They stopped worrying about the fact that they were of different species. They ignored the knowledge that it would change their friendship forever. But at this point, they didn't care.
They were in love, and that was good enough for them.
This was another story brought to you by the mentally unstable Roman Empire. If you have reviews or comments, please send them. As usual, I will accept flames as well, because nothing prevents flames more than being a person who thinks that they are unbelievably funny. See later, same time, same place!
And I must credit the inventor of the term kissing greens: It was my mother. Credit is to be given where it is due.