Oh Marceline! Why'd You Have To Turn Thirteen?



"Hey Jake?"

"Yeah bro?"

"You think you can scooch just a little bit?"

"Ah, I'm comfortable."

"I know man, but my arm is getting squished against my torso."

"Too bad! I didn't see you for one whole day Finn! And in that day I was tortured by that big nerd! So I'm not leaving your side until I can get those awful memories outta me."

"But Jake, that was two weeks ago! We've been home for a long time!"

"Still haunts me Finn. Woof."

The young adventurer released a heavy sigh and tried to shift away from Jake on the couch. However, the magical dog would have none of it, and he scooched with him. Jake was determined to stick to Finn like glue. Like gum on a shoe. Like peanut butter to toast. Like beans in Lumpy Space Princess's digestive tract.

This wasn't the first time Jake went through a clingy stage. When he and Lady Rainicorn had their first major fight he stuck to Finn. In his clingy stages he was more like a dog than anything. Plus, Jake wasn't too happy when Finn busted into the motel living room holding Marceline crying, "SHE DEAD!", only for it to be a prank after.

Finn sighed and rested his chin on his hand, putting his elbow on the couch cushion. "You do know that eventually you'll have to stop snuggling, right?" he asked.

"Shushers," Jake replied.

"I'm sorry the Ice King was so traumatizing, bro. But I mean, better he stuck with you than capture princesses, right?"

A loud growl was the reply.

"Well, it's not like I'm going inside your brain to retrieve the memory of you spending time with Ice King. I'm never going in another creature's brain. Ever. EVER."

Now Jake looked at him seriously. "That's exactly what you need to do."

"What?!" Finn shrieked.

"If you love me, bro, you'll go!"

"No man! That's asking too much!"

"You went inside Marceline's brain!"

"Cause otherwise she'd have died n' stuff!"

"Oh, I've got a bad case of n' stuff, Finn! A baaaaaaaad case of n' stuff!"

"What does that even mean?"


There was no reasoning with Jake. Not now, anyway. Usually when Jake was upset, he tended to get over dramatic and made no sense. Add in his clingy stage, and Finn had a real complicated problem on his human hands. There was also another thing Jake did when he was upset...

"Ever notice that Peppermint Butler never talks about his mother? What kind of butler has no relationship with his mother?"

Yeah, whenever Jake was upset, he felt better talking smack about Peppermint Butler. It was completely harmless, the smack that was said about the poor Candy Kingdom worker, but still. Was it really Jake's business if Peppermint Butler discussed with his mama?

"Okay man, it looks like I'm going to have to go to extreme measures to make sure you get past this little bump in our brohood," Finn said. He took out a tiny blue whistle from his pocket, put it to his mouth, and blew in it.

"I didn't hear anything," Jake said.

"Nah man, it's not a dog whistle."

"Then what kind of whistle is it?"

"You'll see." The two sat patiently on their couch. After a few minutes, there was a knock on the front door. "It's open," Finn said.

The door opened and in flew Lady Rainicorn. "BABY-CAKES!" Jake cried. He turned to his bro, "Wait, you have a rainicorn whistle?"

Finn nodded. "Jake, give Finn some space," Lady Rainicorn then said.


"Jake. It's almost 4:00. Time to play our violins. You like your violin, don't you?" his girlfriend asked gently.


"Then come on now."

"But I don't wanna leave Finn."

"Now now Jake. Come on. I've got a surprise for you."

"You do?"


Jake ran over to Lady Rainicorn. "What?!" he exclaimed in excitement. She smiled and pulled him into a hug. "This is the best surprise!" he laughed gleefully.

Finn smiled. "Okay, so are we good, buddy? You're through clinging to me and bashing Peppermint Butler?"

The magical dog nodded. "Yes." He turned back to Lady Rainicorn. "Come on sweets, let's go jammin!"

She smiled and the two left the house, off to their secret violin playing spot. For the first time in two weeks, Finn was alone in the house. "Best investment I ever made," he grinned, holding up the rainicorn whistle.


That night Finn dropped Beemo off at soccer practice and had two hours to kill before he needed to pick him up again. The soccer games were held in the large fresh cut grass field, where Finn and Jake fought those cute little creatures. Even though there were no torches or light fixtures in the field, the moonlight was bright, and there were hundreds of hundreds of fireflies around the skies.

The adventurer had no problem seeing as he trudged through the dark forest. He usually had his backpack slung across his shoulders, in fact, he always had his green backpack with him. But tonight he left his beloved backpack behind, actually, he wasn't even wearing his usual clothes. All Finn wore was a simple white t-shirt, blue jeans, and his white hat that was unstrapped. Blonde locks fell in front of his face but he had grown accustom to that, and no longer bothered to brush back his hair.

"It's just too lumpin' luscious to be contained," LSP had once said.

As weird as that was, she was right. His hair was too lumpin' luscious.

He stopped walking. For one moment, Finn thought he was back in the memories. His mind had been playing tricks on him ever since he got back. There were some moments where he could swear he's still in the memories, but then he realizes that he's in the real world. It's really him standing in the forest, really him surrounded by trees, the moonlight shining down on him is real.


And the shrilled voice that just sounded off the forest was real, too. Or perhaps it wasn't, but Finn heard it, and his instincts told him that real or not, it would be smart of him to start— running for his life! He took off, and he could feel the tremors beneath his feet. His head snapped around and the adventurer was surprised to see a pack of Why Wolves coming his way!

"Stampede!" Finn cried, and he ran faster!

What was causing these Why Wolves to run like crazy? Well, not that they needed a reason, they were a whack species to begin with. "Hey! There's that Finn kid up ahead!" one cried to the others.

"Let's run him over!"

"Yeah, let's make a Finn pancake!"

Of all times I left my backpack and sword at home! I'm such a tard! Finn thought to himself. No matter, he didn't need his sword or backpack to outrun these losers. He just needed— special maneuvers!

He started running left and right, kicking off treetrunks, grabbing tree branches to help his swing! One of the Why Wolves inside the pack must have had a boom box, because awesome music started playing. Finn didn't question the random playing of said music, instead it encouraged him to run faster. He also didn't question why the Why Wolves suddenly had a vendetta against him. It wasn't even the same one he ran into awhile back, it was a whole new pack!

To Finn's thirteen year old horror, he was running out of forest. A cliff was coming and he was familiar enough with it to know it was steep! He had to keep running and think of a plan! Talk about multi-tasking! The wolves had him surrounded, it's not like he could veer left or veer right. They wanted to send him off this cliff. That was that.

"Hey! Why you dudes wanna kill me!" Finn shouted over the awesome music.

"Don't question us!" was a reply.

"Don't ask why!" came another.

"Pretty mama, lemme whispa somethin' in yo ear..."

Finn made a grimaced face. "Shut up, Betty!" a wolf then yelled, probably to the one who just spoke.

The cliff closed in. Maybe Jake is getting my ESP bro signals and will save me, Finn thought. No! I've been through too much to die by jumping off a cliff! I AM GONNA JUMP! And I will live! Because I'm Finn, I'm cute, beat boxin, and AWWWWEEEESOOOOMMMEEEEE!

Apparently, the adventurer was really good at giving himself pep talks. Especially when those pep talks were to jump off of a cliff. Seriously, how many people can convince themselves to willingly jump off a cliff with Why Wolves chasing them? Serious emphasis on the Why Wolves.

And... off he went.

"Whoa dudes, that human just jump off the cliff all by himself?" one wolf asked the pack.

"Yeah, he did."

"Wow that's extreme."

"We were just going to bring him to the edge and scare him."

"Yeah... we didn't want him to actually die..."

"Alright wolves, time to think of an alibi."

"Wait, he's flying! Someone caught him!"


Down, down, down. He flipped through the air, his hat somehow staying on his head, the wind encircling him and time passing by in a second. Then, that was all brought to a halt. An abrupt halt that had his head spinning.

He suddenly wasn't twisting and turning through the air, instead he was flying up instead of falling down. "My glob... I've attained supernatural powers!" Finn exclaimed. "Finally, my diary has come true!"

"Finn. Look up."

There was Marceline, the Thirteen Queen, giving Finn in incredulous yet amused look. She would hassle him about the diary later, but for now, that wasn't too important. It was a good thing she had her strength back, because if she was the weak thirteen year old she used to be, holding Finn would be impossible.

"Hey, Marceline," the adventurer smiled. "You wouldn't happen to have anything to do with the Why Wolves... would you?"

She grinned. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, you did!"

Marceline laughed. "Okay, okay, I told them they would have fun chasing you. But I didn't think you'd jump off the cliff. You stupid boy."

He shrugged. "I was prepared to go down in honor."

"That makes no sense."

"Yeah, I know." They both chuckled.


If you're wondering what Finn and Marceline are, you should know Finn was wondering the same thing a week ago. He didn't know if the vampire was... his girlfriend. And as much as that made him squirm and embarrassed to think about, he did think about it, and he decided he'd like it if she were his girl.

It wasn't the same hesitation when she was an older vampire. Now she was his age, but she was also going to stay that way until another potion was found. Or perhaps, forever. It was all up to her. The most important thing was that he got his Marcie back.

However, Finn knew he had to confront his feelings. If he didn't his emotions would send him into turbulence, and one morning after many years of heartbreak, he'd wake up with a hole in his chest. Literally. At least, these were the stories Jake told him when he was eleven. Now that the adventurer thought about it, Jake could have been lying...

Finn, being Finn, could never talk about the subject of love easily. "So," he had said, drawling out his 'so'. He and Marceline had been drinking strawberry smoothies on the Candy Kingdom roof.

"Just spit it out," she growled.

"Um, okay. So... you."


"Yeah. And me."


"Yeah. Um... are we... like... a boy and girl?"

"Well yeah, you're a boy and I'm a girl. Finn, I thought Jake gave you a book that explained—"

"That's not what I meant! I meant to put 'friend' at the end! Are we boyfriend/girlfriend?!"

Finn didn't mean to shout this particular question, but his nerves got the better of him. He turned a bright pink, and chewed on the straw of his smoothie to calm himself. His companion may look thirteen, but she was still the same Marceline on the inside.

Although, now she showed a side of her that he rarely had seen. She looked at him softly and the expression on her face was anything but teasing. "Ah Finn," Marceline said gently. "You're the most important creature in my world."

She was going to reject him. He knew it. "It's alright," he mumbled, trying not to sound too hurt.

"No. Finn. I want to be close to you, you know that."

He looked up at her. "You do?"

"Yes. But you have to understand, right now my life turned crazy. I don't know what I want to do. I don't know how long I want to stay this way, if I'll find another potion to change me back, if I can age or not. For all we know, five years down the line you're seventeen and I'm seventeen with you. Or, I'm still thirteen. Or, I'm back to being what I used to be. There's a lot of confusion right now."

Finn understood what she was saying, he really did. "Okay," he said, trying to smile. "It's alright Marceline. You know I'm not crazy about relationships n' stuff."

She rested her head against his shoulder. This surprised him, but he enjoyed having her cuddle him. Partly because it was rare! "Don't misunderstand me," the vampire whispered. "When I told you that you were the most important creature to me, I meant it. Living or dead. I don't want to take advantage of your kindness, Finn. You don't have to wait for me."

Surprisingly, the adventurer brought Marceline into a hug, holding her tightly against him. "No. There's no taking advantage," he replied. "I love you, Marcie. And I'll wait. The important thing is that I spend time with you and be with you... no matter what you decide."

If there was ever a time Marceline felt like goop, now was the time. She buried her head into his chest, but decided that wasn't good enough. Slowly, she raised up, and she kissed Finn gently. He returned it, of course, his hands going on either side of her cold cheeks. They kissed each other without worry that anyone would see them. It didn't matter.

And he breaks the kiss, only because he has to breathe. This kissing business wasn't his expertise. "I love you too, weenie," she whispered. "And your breath smells like nachos."

"Peppermint Butler gave me some. I thought the smoothie killed the smell."

"No, Peppermint Butler's nachos are some powerful stuff. That smell will stay for a good week."

"That sucks."

They both laughed.



"Hey Beemo. Have a good time at soccer?"

"Oh, yes. The ball was coming at me and I kicked it. Everyone shouted 'goal'! It was fun!"

Finn laughed. "That's good buddy."

"Hey Finn?"


"Why is Marceline floating over our heads?"

"Oh, she likes to do that. Want her to pick you up and fly you too?"

"No thanks." Finn shrugged. They needed to get home and eat some dinner. "So, what did you do during my practice?" Beemo asked.

The adventurer smiled. "Oh you know... got chased by Why Wolves, jumped off a cliff, got saved by Marcie, went ghost hunting, tripped down another cliff, got saved by Marcie, ate some fruit snacks. The usual." He grinned.

Beemo just shook his robotic head. "You two can be so weird."

Finn laughed and looked up at the flying Marceline. "You hear that? He thinks we're weird!"

She grinned. "Well duh!"

And the three walked off, ready to continue in their lives, that was sure to be filled with adventure.

The End.

Oh wait, some of you might be wondering; whatever happened to the second potion? There were two if you re-read, one was drunk by Marceline, but what became of the other? Well, it turns out, Ice King never lost his other aging potion. It was stolen! By a small, cute, big eyed penguin named— Gunter.

Inside the Ice Kingdom...

"Wat wat wat wat!"

"No Gunter, no pudding for you! This is daddy's pudding," Ice King said. "Go to your room."

"Wat wat wat wat wat!"

"Don't argue with me! My underpants are clean! Go!"

Gunter waddled off, going into his icy bedroom. "Wat wat wat." He smiled to himself. "Wat wat wat wat." Yes, having Ice King gone for three days on a quest for a potion HE had was good revenge. Gunter waddled over to his little penguin bed, checking under the pillow. There was the potion. "Wat wat wat wat."

One day. One day.


Author's Note:

And that was this story's epilogue! I hope y'all like it, and thank you so much for reading! I also hope you liked my Gunter twist XD I love that little penguin. So much. Hahaha XD I really appreciate everyone that read and reviewed this story. It means a lot =]

For the final time, please review and thank you for reading.

Much love and penguins,