One more chance
One more chance
Hello guys! So, this is my first fanfiction ever. I read a lot of Twilight fanfiction and I always wanted to give it a try. I have been thinking about this story for a while, so I am not exactly making it on the go. I'll like to warn you that English is not my first language, so there might be some mistakes, well... a LOT so please be patient, and if you notice something, please tell me! I am also looking for a Betta reader for this story, so I won't have this problem... If anyone is up for the job, let me know! I'll try to post every sunday, I have hopes that I'll be able to keep on schedule since I know where the story is headed. So thanks again for reading. See ya at the bottom!
Full Summary: When Edward met Bella it was love at first sight. They were made for each other. Six months after meeting each other he pops the question. Never doubting her love for him Bella says yes, but, on their wedding day, Bella finds that Edward has made the worst thing she never thought he would do to her. Hurt, Bella runs away without a trace. No one ever knew nothing more about her. Broken, Edward "tries" to go on with his life, but he never stopped loving her. Four years later Edward finds himself on a park, where he bumps into her. What happens when he discovers that she is NOT with someone, but also she is not EXACTLY alone? Will Edward overcome his fears and do what's best to get his family back? Or will he fail and lose what's now EVERYTHING to him? Will Bella ever forgive him? Will Bella give him One More Chance?
*WARNING* This story contains scenes about non-consensual sex and criminal use of a rape drug. It's not too graphic, just dreams and memories but if you are sensitive to these themes, feel free to skip it. I won't be offended =)
Chapter 1. The man who can't be moved
"The Man Who Can't Be Moved" – The Script
Going Back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag I'm not gonna move
Got some words on cardboard, got your picture in my hand
Saying, "If you see this girl can you tell her where I am? "
Some try to hand me money, they don't understand
I'm not broke I'm just a broken hearted man
I know it makes no sense but what else can I do
How can I move on when I'm still in love with you
'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinkin maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on the corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving
The alarm on my clock tells me it's time to wake up. I don't wanna wake up. I know what day is today, and I don't wanna wake up.
I hit the snoozer.
The fucking alarm rings again.
I get frustrated and end up throwing the damn thing against the wall. Dramatic much? Well, believe it or not it happens every year. I guess I'll have to go to Best Buy later. As every year. But, who cares? Right?
August 13th, Fuck. You.
Before you judge me, let me explain why I am being like this. Today should have been the best day of my life 4 years ago. Funny how things worked out in the end, as of now I'll damn this day for the rest of my existence.
My name is Edward Anthony Cullen, I am a 29 years old pediatrician and surgeon who fucked up big time exactly 4 years ago. See, I was going to marry the love of my life, but it took a few shots of tequila and a fuck-wit like me to fuck up my own wedding… or life I'll say, as she was my life. She still is though, that's why I don't wanna face this day. I can't bear it, even though today isn't much different from any other day -as I am not living anymore- so what difference does it make? She left. Now I barely exist, I just go day by day, minute by minute. I get up early for work; go to the clinic, work, lunch, work, and come back home to a cold bed. Alone. What a life. But still, this day is the hardest, but again I know I deserve it after what I did. I'll never forgive myself, so I never expected her to forgive me, or anyone from my family even though they did. I don't deserve any of them.
My family… at first I know they were disappointed, I could see the judgment in their eyes, especially Carlisle, my dad. He was the hardest on me. But they had no other option than support me as they are my family… well, some of them did. Others like my sister, Alice hold what happened against me for a couple of years. After all, I took her best friend away from her. We are ok now, but it took me a visit to the hospital for her to talk properly to me again. Yeah, I am not proud of that, even though I barely remember…
I was on the floor, watching as the bottle beside me emptied itself all over the carpet in my living room. I heard voices… but I wasn't there. I heard screaming, crying and more screaming, but I didn't make sense of any of it. I wasn't here anymore… I was in my happy place.
"EDWARD! EDWARD! OH MY GOD! EMMETT HELP ME!"
"FUCK! EDWARD WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO!?" I think that was Emmet. I felt rather than saw someone feeling my pulse on that vein on my neck, but I wasn't here.
I was with her, we were at our usual spot at the coffee shop. She was on my lap, her hand in mine, my lips on her temple. My favorite place after her lips, as I could smell her hair at the same time…
"ALICE! CALL AN AMBULANCE AND GET A HOLD ON YOUR DAD! NOW!" Mom cried.
"Fucking hell, Edward! What were you thinking you fucking IDIOT!?" Emmet cried.
Emmet never cried. What was happening?
She traced her fingers over my jaw and temple in a tender caress and I stole a kiss on her lips… making her giggle. The sound went straight to my chest making my heart flip a couple of times. It was my favorite sound in the entire world.
"Do you… do you think… he emptied… everything already?" Mom sobbed.
"I don't know, maybe…" Emmet's unsure voice drifted into my mind but I tried to push it away. I was on my happy place. "but I only see bile… Shit I don't think he ate at all today… but his pulse is really low… as is his temperature… FUCK! ALICE WHERE'S THE FUCKING AMBULANCE!" Emmet screamed even harder, if that was possible.
We were walking down the street, on our way to our place hand in hand. She was giggling, I was making her giggle with silly antics. It was my favorite job. She suddenly stopped, put her arms around me and pulled me for a kiss.
"IT'S ON ITS WAY!" Alice cried. "How much do you think he had? Oh my god Edward!" I felt someone touched my forehead.
"I don't know, but the whole fucking LCBO is close enough." An angry and desperate Emmet cried.
"Eddie… I am so sorry" Alice sniffed.
"Edward, c'mon bro!" Emmet urged as I felt someone pushing at my chest repeatedly.
Emmet, I owe him a lot. He practically saved my life I didn't know he had it in him. If it wasn't for him giving me CPR before the ambulance arrived I wouldn't be her right know. He was persistent. He has been there for me along with mom since the beginning. Those first months after she left, they took care of me, even though I could see the hurt in my mother's eyes, her hurt because of my hurting and myself destroying, and the hurt of missing someone that was like a daughter to her. But still she looked after me.
Those first months were hell, I wouldn't listen to anyone, I would start screaming at anyone who mentioned her and throw a fit at anyone who tried to calm me. I stopped working, eating, showering, shaving. They came everyday to take care of those things for me. That's how they found me dying of alcohol poisoning in the middle of my living room that afternoon. Yeah, I know… I am not proud of it. When I started to come around when I got out of the hospital, they tried to engage me into activities with them… simple things, like going to the gym with Em, grocery shopping with mom, or going to the clinic again with dad. Alice even started talking to me again.
But no matter what they tried, I'll never be me again. She left.
When I am not working, surrounded by children, they say I am like a robot, cold and quiet, I think they are right. Me without her… I'm just a body in search of its soul. I wonder if things would be easier if I knew something about her. Like, where she lives now for starters. But that's the thing… I haven't heard anything from her since that day. She just vanished, like smoke. Even my sister knows nothing about her. Sometimes I wonder if Angela -her oldest best friend- really doesn't know anything but she swears she doesn't.
I decide I can't drag this any longer. I've been awake, staring at a spot on wall for an hour by now, -time doesn't mean anything to me anymore- so I get up, and go to the bathroom. I splash my face with cold water, after drying it with a towel I look closely to myself in the mirror and see how time has passed. I can already see the start of some wrinkles on my forehead and in the corner of my eyes. It hurts to actually see how life has go on and I'm still stuck on the same place, but as always I ignore it.
I brush my teeth as I start the shower, beginning my morning routine. I step into the shower stall, grab my shampoo bottle next to hers and put some shampoo on my palm, wash my hair and then my body. As I rub the soap against my torso, my right hand goes down and grab my member. I start with long slow strokes before quickening the pace as I stand down the hot spray, seeking for a fast release, for something to make me feel better at least for a few seconds, I want to forget but as always… after reaching my climax and I am done I feel worse than I did when I woke up. I feel even more empty.
I let out a shaky breath and turn off the shower.
I step out of the shower and go to the walk-in closet next to the bathroom in our room, -yeah, I still call it ours, because it is. Even though she is gone, it still is ours- I ignore the left side of the closet. Her side -untouched since that day, exactly as she left it. With her navy sweater still on the floor next to her favorite sneakers and that blue blouse that I loved on her about to fall from its hanger- and get a pair of jeans and a blue v-neck shirt from my side. After I put my jeans and shirt on, I look myself in the full length mirror in our room and pass a hand through my hair. I gave up on trying to tame it in high school, so I don't bother to comb it now. Plus, she used to love my messy hair, or sex hair, as she called it.
After putting my shoes on I grab the keys to my car and get the hell out of there. I have no appointments for today. Heidi knows better than to arrange an appointment this day. So I have all day to myself, my brooding and my guilt. Nobody really wants to make me company -not that I would allow it- so nobody bothers me.
After a 20 minute ride from our place I park on Queen St. and decide to walk the rest of the way there. To that Tim Hortons on the corner of Richmond St. near the Scotiabank Theater. When I get there I go inside and order the same: black coffee, no sugar. She would always order her same too: French Vanilla Cappuccino, one sugar, extra hot. How could I forget? She could have anything she wanted.
After I get my coffee I go and sit on the same spot, on a corner against the window, and just watch the people pass by. As always, I retrieve to my own and let the memories haunt me.
"Fuckfuck, fuckity, FUCKFUCK!"
I cursed to myself as I walked hurriedly on the sidewalk. Fucking Em, always changing plans on the last minute. He was supposed to pick me up at mine and dad's clinic an hour ago so we could ride together to mom's new gallery opening, but the fucker forgot to tell me that he would get a ride with Rose. So now I am late.
"Sorry Ginger, didn't I leave you a message? Rose called, and turns out she was able to come too. She picked me up."
Fucking Emmet, the love sick IDIOT. The minute Rose enters into his mind it's as if the rest of the world doesn't exist. Yeah… he's whipped, like really bad… movie, fairytale and shit style. One time he and Rose got into a huge fight and the dude was useless, really fucking useless. He didn't even showered for the whole weekend they were apart, it took Jasper and me to get him out of bed for primal things… like eating and shit. And moving around a guy his size ain't easy let me tell ya. But all the trouble was worth it when we got to see Rose kicking his ass for being such a baby when she got back. Emmet might be a big guy but Rose has the pants in that relationship, she can be really scary sometimes. You don't mess with her. I talk about experience here, I am not just digressing.
Anyways, I don't really mind my brother being such a pussy where Rose is concerned, but in situations like this it would be useful for him to use his brain a little bit, don't ya think? Now I am an hour late and have to take the subway because a fucking taxi will take too much time at this time in the late afternoon.
As I am walking to the subway station my blackberry rings, it's a message from Alice.
WHERE ARE YOU! –A
Sorry, I'll be there in fifteen –E
WHAT?! Hurry ur ass up here, the thing is about to finish! –A
"Yeah, like that's what I needed to know." I muttered to myself sarcastically, rolling my eyes at no one. "Damn it!" I was about to reply, when suddenly out of my peripheral vision I saw someone coming out from the Tim Hortons I was passing by and slam against me.
"HEY!" I said.
"SHIT!" she yelped stepping backwards. But it was too late as her beverage spilled all onto herself.
"Fuck, I'm so sorry, are you okay?" I said worriedly, as I knew her drink must have been hot.
"Damn, that was hot!" She screamed, bending forward trying to separate her damped shirt from her stomach.
That's what she said. I stifled my laugh to my own lame joke.
Ok, focus Cullen.
"I'm so sorry, I was on a hurry. Didn't see you" That's when she looked up and I was met with the most beautiful, big, brown eyes I would ever see.
"No, it was my fault," She smiled embarrassedly at me "graceful is not exactly my middle name." She snorted the last bit, with a small lovely blush spreading over her cheeks.
"Still, let me get you another drink? As an apology? I feel awful…" I asked hopeful, I really felt awful especially when I saw her attempting to dry her shirt with a napkin.
"Really, it was not your fault, things like this happens on a daily basis to me." She smiled.
Damn, she had a beautiful smile too.
"Please, otherwise I won't be able to sleep at night." I joked lightly.
"Yeah sure, not repaying a one dollar coffee would take you beauty sleep away." She joked back.
She thought I was beautiful?
"Please, let me make it up to you."
"I'm fine, really."
The chirp on my blackberry alerted me of a new message.
It's over. See you at the after dinner. Dad is pissed. -A
"Humor me?" I said spreading my hand in the direction of the coffee shop
"You don't give up, right?" She raised an eyebrow playfully. Her eyes dancing in amusement.
"Nope" I said, popping the p.
"Ok. Medium French Vanilla Cappuccino. One sugar, extra hot." She nodded with a smile.
"I'm Edward." I stretched my hand out to her.
"Are you Italian?"
As I finished the last of my coffee, I thought about what happened later, when we came inside so I could buy her a new coffee. We sat on this very table and talked for hours, it was amazing. The things she shared with me, what I shared with her, I even forgot about the after dinner. It was as if we knew each other for years instead of hours. She was 22, I learned that she was an only child, her mom left her and her father when she was 6 years old and never came back. Bitch. His father –retired now- used to be chief of police in a small town in the States and never got remarried, she was American but came to Toronto to study English at U of T. She said she wanted something new and different that's why she came to Canada. She had a full scholarship and worked at a café near campus to pay rent. I also learned that aside from being gorgeous, she was smart and funny.
She was perfect.
We exchanged numbers, and for the following couple of weeks we would meet here during our break times. She was about to graduate so she really didn't have much classes to attend to, I on the other hand had recently graduated from med school, earlier than planned thanks to my brains as mom said. In high school, I was kind of a geek… well, not kind of, I was a geek. Dad says I am a genius, -after what happened that day I don't really think so – Jasper, my best friend, even jokes that all the brain cells were spend on me so that's why Emmet doesn't have any. Anyway, coming back to the main topic, I managed to graduate earlier from high school and go straight into med school. That's why at 24 I was working at my Dad's clinic as a received pediatrician, with honors and the whole circus.
It took me 2 weeks to ask her out on an official date. I was scared shitless she would say no, that's why it took me so long.
"You kept me waiting long enough!"
After rolling my eyes at her, I couldn't hide my smile at her answer, it was so big I thought my face was gonna break in two. That Friday I took her out on our very first date. I picked her up at 7 o'clock at her apartment and took her to Canoe. That was my Mom's favorite restaurant and it's pretty good, so I thought it would be a great choice. I was right. After that, we went for a walk through the city. We didn't realize how much time had passed until we saw that almost every store was closed. I took her back to her place and she invited me in… I know what you must be thinking, and the answer is no. I am a gentleman after all, I wasn't planning anything and I liked her a lot, I didn't want to give her a bad impression of me.
When Bella ask me if I wanted to come inside, I was frozen on the spot. I didn't know what to do. Of course I wanted to go inside, I couldn't get enough of her and I didn't want the night to end. But what if this was a test? Was she just being polite? Did she really want me to? What should I do?
She answered my dilemma.
"C'mon, I won't bite." She winked at me, I laughed out loud. "I promise I'll be good." She batted her eyelashes playfully.
"Alright, but only if you are sure."
"I trust you." She said shyly, playfulness gone.
We went into her apartment, it was small and had Bella all over the place. It was incredible how much I already knew her after only 2 weeks. I sat on the couch on her small living room while she went into the kitchen to get a bottle of wine. She came back with it and 2 glasses, offered one to me and sat next to me on the couch.
"So… you like?" She said gesturing to her apartment. I looked to her beautiful profile, marveled at her beauty and happy aura surrounding her.
Very, I wanted to said but I had a felling she wasn't referring to what I was thinking she was.
"Yeah, it's a really nice place. You live alone?" I said instead.
"Well, I used to have a roommate, Angela… I think I told you about her, she's my oldest friend, she moved out a month ago to go and live with her boyfriend." She said smiling.
She smiled a lot, she was a happy person. I loved that about her.
"Any luck finding a new roommate?"
"Nah, and I'm not sure I want one. I always wanted a room for my painting. So I think I'll make her room into a studio or something."
"You paint?" I asked, looking around to see if there was something made by her on the walls.
"Yeah…" she smiled. "And no, you can't see anything."
"Why?" I said turning to her truly disappointed
"I only paint personal stuff, things that resemble important things in my life."
"So?" I insisted.
"If I showed you anything I'll have to kill you after." She winked at me before taking a zip of her wine.
I leaned over, my eyes zeroing into hers.
"I thought you trusted me."
"I do." She said in a weird voice and I saw her swallow a little before composing herself "That's why I told you that I paint. It's a secret." She whispered the last part playfully.
"Awww. C'mon, I promised you I'll play the piano for you one day-"
"How so?" I whispered, tilting my head to the side. Trying to dazzle her into it with the power of my stare, as once my sister told me I had the ability to.
She met my eyes, and I was stunned again by the beauty of hers. We held each other's gaze for a long time until something flashed in her eyes and she shook her head a little.
"Nice try." She smirked, breaking the connection. Huh?
"What?" I said smiling mischievously, hiding my grin while a drank from my glass.
"I know what you are trying. I am not that easy." She laughed taking another zip of her wine.
"Damn!" I said in mock annoyance hitting my leg with my palm, she laughed at that. "So what do I have to do to see The Bella's Gallery?"
"Nobody sees The Bella's Gallery" She laughed, using the same name I used to her paintings.
"What do you mean?"
"That," she shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly "Nobody sees the Bella's Gallery. Simple. I thought you were kind of an Einstein or something." She teased watching me from the ring of her glass while she took a zip.
"Alright, Alright." I said giving up for now "So you just paint for yourself?"
"Mhmm." She said swallowing.
"Do you also like to go to expositions and stuff? Or just to paint?"
"I like to go to expositions and stuff" She laughed the last part "Actually there is a new gallery that opened a couple of weeks ago that I wanted to go, but I hadn't have the time. I have seen other paintings of the artist in different galleries and I like her a lot."
"Who's this gallery?" I said, thinking if maybe Mom knew the artist so I could get her a private viewing or something.
" "Breaking Dawn" by Esme Platt. She has a new series called "Eclipse" that I wanted to see." I almost choked on my wine, from all the artists in Toronto she had to like my mother, what are the odds?
"Yeah, she is great."
"You know her?"
"I'll say so" I grinned.
The look on her face when I took her to my mom's gallery the next day was priceless. Before leaving for the night I asked her if I could see her tomorrow, she immediately said yes. After my heart did some flipping thing inside me, -I know, what a girl I am- I told her I'll pick her up at 6pm the next day. By this time the gallery would be closed but I called Jessica, mom's assistant for a favor. I knew she had a small crush on me so she'll do anything I'll ask for, so by the time we arrived Jessica had everything that I asked for ready. In the middle of the main room, -where the "Eclipse" series were hanging- stood a small table for two with a light dinner, wine and candles.
"Oh my gosh! Are you sure we are allowed to be here?" She asked wide eyed.
"Are you sure?"
"I thought you trusted me?" I teased, she laughed.
"You are going to hold that against me forever don't you?"
I liked the fact that she had said forever.
"Don't worry about this, we are fine" I reassured her.
"Really?" She asked with excitement on her voice looking around.
"Really" I loved making her smile. "Now, tour?"
She nodded and I took her hand in mine, when she didn't pull away I let out a sigh in relief and smiled at her, she returned it with a shy smile of her own and I winked at her before pulling her to the farthest end of the room, to the first painting.
So I began to explain her about the artist's techniques, inspirations and theme of the series that I knew as if I had done them myself.
"…she prefers to use expressionism lighting, as it gives more dramatics to her paintings… also with this technique she can bring the attention to any part of the painting she wants, something you couldn't do with realism, as the light would have to follow certain path-"
"You never told me you knew about art." She asked raising an eyebrow.
"Well… I grew up surrounded by artists."
"Well..." I passed a hand through my hair nervously, a habit I got from my dad. "You see… my mom… she is the artist."
She laughed. Why is she always laughing at me?
"What are you laughing at?" I asked, feigning offence.
"Figures." She muttered to herself "You are so adorable, thank you for doing all this for me, you didn't have to." She smiled.
"I know… I like to… though. It's nice to see you smile like that." I said, caressing her left cheek with the back of my fingers with my free hand. She looked down shyly, a lovely blush spreading through her cheeks and neck. When she looked back at me, her gaze held mine once again. Her eyes hiding something big, some emotion I couldn't decipher but that trapped me into her deep brown eyes. It thrilled me, making my heart beat a thousand miles per hour in excitement, joy and fear at the same time. As if my heart knew something that my mind had yet to realize.
"So… are you going to kiss me now?" My fingers were still against her cheek.
"…hmm… shou- "
But I was cut short by her lips on mine.
Yeah, she kissed me first, that's how awesome she was. I still remember how that first kiss felt like, what was passing through my mind. I just knew then and there that everything I had been looking for, everything I didn't even know that I wanted, and everything I'll ever need was there between my hands.
I rubbed my chest, trying to ease the ever present pain there. Where are you?... Are you happy?... Are you with someone else? I rubbed my face furiously with both hands at that thought, frustration, anger and guilt building inside me. When I looked down and saw my hands were wet I realized I was crying. Again. You would think that by being a man I should be handling things differently, that I was being a selfish bastard after what I did, but I just can't. She is my life… when she left, she took everything away with her, and I'm empty… I'm nothing without her, nothing.
The pain, ugh… the pain… it never goes away, it never got easier through the years either, I just learned to exist with it by going numb through most part of the day. After the episode with the alcohol poisoning, I promised my family that I'll never drink like that again, I told them I was sorry and that I would start trying -I don't know what- but that they didn't have to worry about me anymore. So to avoid any future incidents I stopped doing stuff that reminded me of her. I stopped playing the piano, listening to music, watching series, buying fucking Pop Tarts… Only when I was alone at night I would crumble sometimes now. When something or someone would trick it by accident, like if Lifehouse's "You and Me" played on the radio, if "Friends" was on the neighbors TV or if I caught a glimpse of some Pop Tarts at the grocery's store. She was addicted to those, she would make me go and get them for her at the Shoppers on the corner at my street whenever we ran out of them.
So I stopped doing everything that reminded me of her… but coming here, I don't know why… I think that maybe, if I come here enough… that maybe… I don't know, I just have this hope that I'll see her you know? or that I'll run into her someday.
My phone rang bringing me out of my musings. I ignored it, I didn't want to talk to anyone. I realized it was getting late so I got up and left the coffee shop. As I walked through the busy street I decided to walk all the way to U of T. You know?... why not putting some more acid on my scarred heart?
While walking to campus, I remembered what happened the next day after our second date at the gallery. It was Sunday and as every Sunday my family and I would have brunch at my parents' house.
I was about to ring the doorbell to Carlisle and Esme's when the door suddenly flew open.
"WHAT'S HER NAME!" My pixie little sister asked, beaming at me.
"Huh?" I asked stupidly.
"Well, hello to you too…" I said ignoring her questioning eyes and making my way in to the house. Once inside I headed to the living room with Alice bouncing up and down right on my heels.
"Don't change the subject, tell me about her!" She insisted.
"About who? Don't know what you are talking about…" I lied shrugging off my jacket and throwing it into the couch.
"Awww c'mon! Just tell me! I know you had a little date with a girl at the gallery" Fucking Jessica and her big mouth "How's she like?" My sister pleaded with her bright, big blue eyes and pouty mouth.
Ugh, I hated when she used the pout on me.
"How's who like?" Emmet suddenly asked, coming into the living room from the kitchen, hand in hand with Rose -nothing new there- and a PBJ sandwich on the other hand –nothing new there either- and sat on one of the couches with Rose on his lap.
"Edward's girlfriend!" Alice squealed clapping her hands together.
"What?!" Emmet and Rosalie asked in unison "Why didn't I know about her?" Emmet continued offended. I just rolled my eyes at them, pulling at my hair at the same time with my right hand infrustration.
"Fucking Jessica" I muttered to myself.
"YOU ARE FUCKING JESSICA?!" Emmet screamed really disturbed. I couldn't blame him, Jessica wasn't something to really be proud of. She was your typical no brains, plastic girl type.
"NO! Of course not!" I yelled immediately.
"Ugh! Thank god!" Emmet shuddered.
"So, who areyou fucking?" Rose piped in.
"I am not fucking anyone." Yet, the horny bastard side of me thought. He was getting bored. Poor guy.
"No surprise there…" Jasper sang, coming from the bathroom down the hall and sat next to Alice with a smirk on his face.
I glared at him.
"What's going on?" Mom asked, coming from the kitchen -with dad right on her heels- carrying a tray of OJ and placing it on the coffee table.
"EDWARD HAS A GIRLFRIEND!" Alice screeched excitedly.
"What?" Mom asked looking at me, a huge fucking smile on her face. The woman was glowing, I could see the hope on her eyes. She had been worried that I was a little lonely, with school I didn't really had time to date and after the whole Tanya incident… -I shuddered, better not go there- she might have thought I was done dating and scarred for life.
"Ugh!" I groaned hating the sudden attention. "Why Alice?! I really don't want to do this now!"
"Just tells us her name" Mom pleaded "I want to know the name of the girl who finally melted your frozen heart." She teased, but I could see the light in her eyes.
"That is… if she is a girl" Jasper said making Emmet bark a laugh, Rose joining him.
"Hardy har" I said without humor.
Ok, what if I haven't had an official girlfriend for a couple of years? Is not as if I hadn't get some since then. Ok, I know I am not a man whore or anything close to it but I still have the oils changed once in a while you know? I just have been on a dry spell lately.
"So," my dad finally spoke "are you really seeing someone?" he asked tentatively.
At that I couldn't help the fucking smile that threatened to split my face in two. My mom always said I was an open book and anyone could read me easily.
I yelped at my pixie's sister's joy.
"AGHHHHHHHHHHH!" Alice squealed, leaving us all deaf for a minute or two. Seriously, how someone so little can have lungs like hers? It was beyond me.
"It was about time Eddie, welcome to manhood!" Emmet said, I just rolled my eyes at him again. That pretty sure was my answer at everything he said.
I flipped him off and Mom ignored that, she was a woman on a mission, she wanted information
"So, why didn't you bring her today? What's her name? How old is she? Why don't you call her now and ask her to come and join us?" She asked seriously.
"Are you crazy? You seriously expect me to bring her to this crazy household?"
"Hey!" Alice scolded "Don't be a jackass, we are just so happy for you. We love you and you deserve to be happy." She pouted trying to convince me by being all sweet and innocent. Fuck again with that fucking pout!
"Don't even try that shit with me, I invented that pout and the answer still is no. At least not yet." I said a little annoyed.
"AWWWW! Edward, c'mon! you are being a bad brother you know?" Alice pouted again, she was being difficult.
"Sorry Alice, I won't bring Bella-"
"HA! At least we know it's a girl!" Jasper said
"DUDE! Why are you still here?!" I said to an amused Jasper. Yeah, he was my best friend and my sister's boyfriend but still I wouldn't think it twice in kicking his ass if he continued to be no help.
"Bella" Mom mused tapping a finger on her chin. "I like it, is she Italian?" She beamed at this new bit of information.
At that I laughed.
"She gets that a lot." I laugh remembering our first encounter "It's actually short for Isabella, and that's all the info you'll get. Sorry, Cullen inquisition is over." I winked at mom and she pouted. DAMN! I hate when she or Alice use the fucking pout, it does break my heart every time and they know it. Little sneaky bitches, but I won't give in this time.
"I mean it." I said seriously when she wouldn't bulge in.
"Jerk." Mom sneered teasingly at me.
"Yeah, love you too mom" I said over my shoulder heading to the dining room and leaving all the fuck-wits behind.
I was sitting on a bench somewhere at U of T in front o a big building when I looked at my watch and realized it was getting late, so I decided to head back to my car. I groaned when I realized how much I had walked but endured the way back. When finally I got to my car, I got inside and headed to Best Buy. When I finally got home I went straight to the fridge, I was starving by then as it was 6 pm already. Time didn't have sense for me anymore as I said before. I could be sitting or staring at something for hours without knowing. Except when I was at the clinic of course, but I was still a complete useless nowadays on my personal life. I made myself a sandwich, poured some juice, headed to the TV room and turned it on on a random channel just to have some noise on the silent house.
Jeopardy was on.
"MARTIN LUTHER KING YOU IDIOT!" Bella screamed at my TV. It was hilarious. It was Wednesday evening, the week following after my parents' brunch. Since then Bella and I have met everyday at Tim Hortons during our breaks and after my shift for dinner. Tonight I decided to take her to my place and order some pizza. That's how I found myself watching Jeopardy with a flustered and angry Bella beside me.
"You know honey, you should go to that show" I teased her as I swallowed a bite from my pizza. She tried to punch me in my chest but I caught her little fist in my hand. "Ha! Feisty are we?" I said wriggling my eyebrows at her making her blush at her outburst. Of course I have learned by now that she blushed pretty often.
I loved it.
"You should be careful you know? I can cause an awful lot of pain if intended. Cop's daughter, remember?" she said pointing to herself with her other hand. "But because you are pretty I'll be nice." She lift her chin in playful arrogance.
She really shouldn't have said that.
I threw her back on the couch and started tickling her all over her stomach, ribs, armpits, nuzzling her neck… Damn, she smelled good.
"STOP!... STOP! PLEASEEE!" She begged between fits of laugher. Yeah, she was ticklish.
"What did you just said?!" I asked trying to control my laugh.
"WHAT… WHAT DID… DID I DO… WRONG?!"
"Men are not supposed to be pretty, what the hell?" I looked at her incredulously as I grabbed both of her wrists with one hand and held them over her head. "Men are supposed to be Hot," I kissed her throat "Sexy," chin "Handsome," left eye "not…" nose "pretty." I said with a grimace.
She laughed even more at my explanation.
"Release me NOW! Or you'll be sorry" she challenged me.
"I'll take my chances" I winked at her.
She eyed me for a second as if contemplating something. Suddenly, out of nowhere she attacked my mouth with hers. To say I was shocked would be the understatement of the year. As the kiss grew in its intensity, my hands released her wrists, grabbing her hair with one hand while the other made its way from her neck to her waist. My hands immediately reacting as if they had mind of their own, roaming along her perfect body. I let out a moan when I felt her little hands travel from my chest down to my stomach, making my heart beat increase and my mind go crazy with that taste of her in my tongue and her sweet scent swirling in my lungs. She started tugging the hem of my shirt, trying to take it off unsuccessfully. I decided to help her, I leaned away and got rid of it in a second, after that she made us roll so she could be on top of me, straddling me on the couch. Fucking excellent, I thought as my hands finally got a grip of her perfect ass and push her against my erection.
Yeah, I have noticed her ass before.
My girl was perfect from head to toe.
Her hands went immediately to my hair -by now I knew she liked to have a hold of it while kissing- tugging it to bring my face even closer to hers, our lips searching each other fervently as she started grinding against me, our chests heaving with their erratic breath and I could feel it waking up.
Junior was getting pretty excited too soon.
I started to feel her up, her fucking noises and amazing kisses turning me on and making me dizzy with lust. My hands traveled upwards, over her waist and all the way up her ribs. One of my hands went under her shirt and I felt her tremble under my touch when my thumbs grazed the swell of her breasts. Moaning my name over my mouth sending shivers down my body, hearing her say my name like that. She was so beautiful and sexy I needed more and more of her.
"Bella…" I started to say, but she hushed me with another deep kiss. "So… beautiful…" I whispered in her ear and she brought my mouth back to hers. Her tongue doing wonders at fucking my with my brain.
"… and the answer is… MARTIN LUTHER KING!..." I heard the host from the TV say.
"See… I am always right." She whispered seductively against my lips and I smiled at her.
Then she was gone. I opened my eyes, confusion running through my mind when I saw her putting her hoodie on and grab her purse.
What the hell?
"Where are you going?" I asked bewildered.
She came back, leaned down and gave me a chaste kiss on my lips
" I said you'll be sorry" She winked playfully at me.
After a few moments trying to get my bearings, I finally got out of my daze.
"Jezebel" I sneered at her with mock accusation on my eyes and she laughed at my expression.
God I loved that sound.
"Sorry, gotta go, I have classes in the morning. See ya tomorrow?" She asked then a little unsure, feeling a little guilty about my new found dilemma that's was threatening to come out of my jeans.
"I'll think about it" I said nonchalantly as I returned my eyes to the TV.
She laughed and kissed me again, this time lingering a little bit.
Not helping with my dilemma.
"See ya, pretty boy" She whispered against my lips and I threw her a dirty look before she was out.
God, she was stubborn.
And I loved that too.
Damn, I was falling hard and fast.
After washing my dishes I went straight into my bedroom, ignoring the room before mine. It has been 4 years since I played and I don't think I'll ever play again. Entering to my bedroom I stripped myself, to my boxers and threw myself on the large bed. No bothering about brushing my teeth or following my usual night routine. I just wanted sleep to take over. As I laid in bed I started to scan the room and stopped to stare at the book on her bedside table.
Where she left it.
I know I said that I stopped doing things that reminded me of her, and I did. But I just couldn't bring myself to get rid of her stuff, or to storage them. I couldn't, the pain in my chest grew exponentially for even thinking about it. I fisted my pillow with both hands and put it harshly over my face. How could I? Her stuff, her clothes -even though they don't smell like her anymore- are reminders of what we had, they are the living proof that she is out there somewhere, that it wasn't a dream. Not that I'll ever doubted of course, something as beautiful couldn't be a product of my imagination, but those things are proof that something, better than god itself was in my life. Of course, until I decided to fuck it.
Worst part is, I don't even know how it happened.
My hands were covered in blood. I wasn't registering what was going on around me. I could hear people in the background, some of them yelling at me, others trying to talk some sense into me but I wasn't listening. I was kneeled on the floor, staring at the door where she had been not long ago. Alice had tried to go after her… tried to calm her down but she just hugged herself and stepped away from her. Then she stared at me one more time. The pain, hurt, deception and disbelief clear in her eyes, but most of all… betrayal, along with more pain.
Then she left.
And I lost it.
I could still hear crying, sobbing, hushed voices and screaming in the background.
"GET OUT OF HERE YOU FUCKING WHORE!" Alice screamed.
"Son… Edward… are you listening?" Dad asked worriedly "Edward, I need take a look at your wounds. Emmet, let him go. I think it's OK now." I didn't realize till then that someone was holding me still.
"Edward how could you?" Alice scolded me. "Fucking idiot what were you fucking thinking?!"
"Alice… now is not the time" Mom sobbed.
"SO WHEN'S THE TIME? HUH?" Alice screeched "Sorry mom but he deserves this and more. Seriously Edward, congratulations, you just won the Master's Douche title in one morning. What the HELL WERE YOU THINKING! AND IN YOUR WEDDING'S DAY? SERIOUSLY? HOW FUCKED UP ARE YOU?!" Alice was in hysterics now.
"Edward… please son, I need to know if any bones are broken, please… undo your fists." Dad's eyes tried to find mines but I kept looking at the open door.
"I hope you burn in hell" Alice spat harshly.
"Alice… please…" Jasper whispered.
Her eyes… her eyes. I saw them, she was afraid of me… she didn't trust me anymore.
WHAT DID I FUCKING DO?!
I still don't understand. This morning I woke up to a horrible migraine and felt Bella beside me against my back. At that moment I only thought it weird, as she told me she would spend the night at Alice's as the rule was that the groom wasn't supposed to see the bride the night before until the wedding. I had tried to turn to her but… God, I couldn't move yet because of my fucking migraine. I had hoped it would pass soon though, since I didn't wish to have a hangover on my wedding day, but right then… everything was dizzy so I went back to sleep.
A while later, I started to gain conscious again, I wasn't as dizzy and was more aware of my surroundings, that's when I felt that something was off. She wasn't as warm, and I couldn't smell her strawberry shampoo.
I decided to wake her up with soft kisses as she liked it, but when I turned over I was met with strawberry blonde hair.
I quickly sat up and froze on the spot, at the same time the covers fell from my chest and I realized I was also naked.
What the fuck?
I started to panic as realization settle in, eyes going wide and my mind running a mile per hour trying to remember what happened last night. My hands started to tremble violently, my breathe coming out in shattered spasm. At that second the door to the bedroom opened, my head turned in its direction so fast I thought it would fall.
"Good morning sunshine!" Bella beamed at me, but her smile faded fast at the expression on my face. Frowning she took a step closer. "Edward? What's wro-" but she stopped short when something moved beside me, her eyes zeroed in that direction, her frown deepening with confusion on her face, then… her eyes went wide when she realized what or who it was.
I woke up abruptly, panting and sweating to a dark room. Sheets scrambled between my legs on my large cold bed.
I closed my eyes, only to see hers. They were full of pain… I made that.
It was my fault.
I cried myself to sleep.
Author's Note: Soooooooooo, what do you think? You like? You hate? Do you have any suggestions? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE ME A REVIEW! I am new at this so I need you advice and opinion ;) Till next time!