Wow, series 4 has been great so far, I'm loving it! So sad it's already coming to an end. This is a little one shot that randomly came into my head when I saw Morgana sitting on the throne of Camelot once more in Sword in the Stone Part 1 - has she truly found everything she desired now, or is there something still missing?
I hope you all enjoy! :)
BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS
"There is blood on your hands Uther Pendragon, blood that will never wash off." – Morgana, series 1
As I sit here, on this throne, the same throne that my tyrant of a father and a traitor of a brother once sat, I think about what I have achieved.
I have brought Camelot to its knees once more, only this time there will be no mistakes; I will not fall from this throne. I feel the power I hold in my hands, as precious and magnificent as liquid gold that flows through my fingers. The strength of this power engulfs me, and it belongs to me, only me, no one else.
Men are falling at my feet; the courtyard has been washed with the blood of betrayers. I feel like I have stepped into a wonderful dream. This is what Morgause wanted and what I have been working towards for what feels like hundreds of years. This is what I deserve. At last, I am Queen.
And yet something is missing.
I remember when I was living in this castle, young, ignorant of my past and my powers, I would hear laughter echoing off the walls, a friendly face would be there to greet me when I turned a corner and there would be someone to talk to when I felt lost. But now the corridors are silent, the life in this castle has died, there are no more friendly faces. And somehow, I miss that.
But what I miss most of all is something I never had.
The hearts of people belong to me, but no one had given willingly, and in return, I have no one to give mine to. No man sits beside me on my throne, so I sit alone.
I may have all the power I ever wished for, but inside I feel empty.
I see people comforting each other, who have come to harm under my iron fist. I feel something break inside me as I realise that if I feel alone, no one will put their arm around me, if I feel lost, there is no one to talk to any more, and if I cry, no one will kiss away my tears. These lowly peasants don't know that they have something even I never realised I desired so much.
I have everything, and yet I am so alone.
I reach out for someone's warm hand to grasp at this thought, but there is no one there.
The few men who stand beside me - Helios and Agravaine – are nothing to me, they may pretend to love me and care for me, but what they feel is nothing but lust and a longing for a share of my power.
No one will truly love me for who I am anymore.
My heart is slowly turning to stone, sometimes I feel it and I want to scream in pain.
And sometimes, I look down at the destruction I have caused, I see people cower with fear, the few brave ones left being led to the gallows or the dungeons, and I wonder if it was ever worth it.
I look down at my hands and I see the blood I have spilt, dripping off my fingers and staining my pale skin.
There is blood on my hands, and it will never wash off.
So...what did you think? Please review! :D