First Merlin fic ever. No idea where it came from or why, but it's done and I figured I should post it. Only been a fan for about a month but it's completely consumed all my thoughts and moments. This can only be a good thing, or so I hope.
Disclaimer: Nope, not mine. If only though. I would love to have Merlin and Gwaine all to myself.
Merlin babbles, he knows that he does, but only with Arthur. He knows that the others have noticed, that when he is with Gwaine and Elyan he can allow a comfortable silence to settle between them. When he is with Arthur, however, the words seem to come without thought, a nervous flow of drivel and rubbish that fills the empty moments between them.
Merlin knows why he does it, he knows why the words seem to come in an endless stream from his lips without real thought. He even thinks that Lancelot might have suspected the reasons for it himself before he died. The others are oblivious to his reasons, ignorant of his magic and the secrets that he keeps locked deep in his heart. He knows that they think it is purely because he is made nervous by Arthur's position and power. That is not it in the slightest.
Merlin talks constantly, an endless babble and plethora of words and stories that mean little or nothing to a man who was once a prince and is now a king. He does it because he fears that one day he will be unable to bear the silence between them. He fears that one day the moments without words will stretch to the point when he has to tell his king the truth that he fears to tell. He worries that one day he will tell Arthur about his magic before it is time to reveal that truth. He talks in this endless moment of nothingness and meaningless rubbish to disguise that one fear.
He does it to protect that secret that he is so terrified to reveal.