Here it is! My first fanfiction! So, Hibernian Princess created a hilarious story called Ranger Corps: Men in Cloaks that you should probably read before you read this, since this is in fact a response to a challenge posted on the Men in Cloaks Forum… Go check it out!
One of those disclaimer things: I own Ranger's Apprentice, because I write fanfiction about a series I wrote and own. *SARCASM* I do not own the song Colors of the Wind, nor do I have any desire to. I don't even own the Men in Cloaks, which goes to *sobs* Hibernian Princess… READ AND LAUGH! (hopefully)
This will be OOC. That's the point.
Two Rangers were riding towards the Gathering Ground. One was a grizzled old master, and the other was his rather annoying apprentice. Currently, the annoying apprentice was pestering his thoroughly annoyed master about the newest musical number they would soon be performing. The master raised an eyebrow, mentally gagged his apprentice (for he had done this many times before), and did not answer any of the growing amount of questions.
"Halt, haven't I trained extra hard lately? Especially on my stag leaps?" started Gilan.
Halt was not planning to answer this latest question. But, eventually, because Halt was not an eight foot tall warlock who could strangle bears(or apprentices) with his bare hands, he gave a noncommittal grunt.
"Halt! You're not listening!" Gilan whined.
Halt opened his mouth to make a sarcastic reply. It died unexpectedly when Crowley rushed up to him, silently, of course.
"Halt! Where's the new musical number you promised?"
A perplexed Crowley watched as Halt dismounted Abelard and strode away, muttering something about 'those darned questions'.
Halt finally disclosed the details of the musical number after the main meeting. All the other Rangers filed out of the tent, leaving only the two senior Rangers. Crowley gasped in amazement as he saw that Halt had modified the lyrics to the popular song, Colors of the Wind. It had been retitled Shadows and the Wind.
"Halt, this is… genius! How on earth did you come up with it?"
"With my brain, presumably,"
"We have to announce it to the rest of the Corps!"
"Come on, Halt! You've come up with this," Crowley paused to wave around the sheaf of papers in his hand, "work of art, and you don't want to accept your rightful ownership?"
"No," Halt growled, grabbing the neatly organized stack out of Crowley's grasp.
Crowley snatched the packet back. "Well, then I'll tell them for you!"
"Then I'll dump your coffee in the river,"
It was the next morning when the Commandant made his announcement. Wisely, Crowley decided to restrain from telling the Corps about the real creator of the newest number.
Gasps of awe were heard throughout the Grounds.
"When did you do all of this, Halt?" Gilan whispered, being one of the few people who knew of Halt's true status as the main writer and choreographer for the Corps.
"Not so loud!" Halt snapped, not wanting all of Araluen to know about his musical number.
"Halt, I'm whispering,"
Crowley moved among the ranks, distributing the packet stating the lyrics and dance moves.
"CORPS! Positions, please!" Crowley shouted.
The conductor of the orchestra, Ranger Gustav, lifted his baton. Various rangers hurried to rosin their bows one last time before the performance.
The out of tune, rattling sounds of the basses rang throughout the air.
"BASSES! YOU PLAY LIKE A FFLUMMPTHPH!" announced Gustav.
Gustav lifted his baton, once again. This time, beautiful, tuned, A's resonated through the clearing.
The violins began plucking their strings as well, harmonizing with the violas and cellos. They created a rhythmic beginning, Halt thought.
Then, he realized that his solo was next. He stepped forward and sang, "You think I'm a mysterious wizard, and you've farmed so many crops, I guess it must be so… But still I cannot see, if the mysterious one is me… how can there be so much that you don't know? You don't know…"
The Men in Cloaks formed a line, shuffling from side to side. Crowley belted out, "You think you own whatever land you farm on, the Earth is just a dead thing you CAN CLAIM! But I know every rock and tree and creature, has a life, has a spirit, has a name."
The orchestra provided a musical interlude as the Corps moved to a new position, swishing their cloaks as they went.
One of the few soprano Rangers began singing, "You think the only people, who are PEOPLE, are people who look and think like YOOOOU, but if you walk the footsteps, of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew, never knew."
The whole Corps joined in for the chorus: "Have you ever seen your arrow fly to the blue corn moon, or asked your grinning pony why he grinned? Can you sing with all the voices of the RANGERS? Can you move with all the shadows and the wind? Can you move with all the shadows and the wind?"
Gilan epically stag leaped across the clearing, and exclaimed,"Come sneak through the hidden pine trails of the forest, come taste the bittersweet coffee of the EARTH, come train in all the riches all around you, and for once, never wonder what they're worth!"
Halt slowly started his second, rather short, solo. "Abelard and Blaze are my brothers!"
Gilan interrupted, "I always suspected Halt was part horse,"
Halt glared at Gilan, and quickly amended his statement. "Crowley and Jonathan are my brothers!"
"Abelard and Blaze are my friends!" Gilan shrieked.
The Men in Cloaks joined together in a circle, doing a slow turn around the clearing. "And we are all connected to EACH OTHER, in a circle, in a hoop that never ends!"
Crowley dramatically gestured to Halt's horse. "How fast can Abelard go? If you tie him up, then you'll never knooow!
Once again, the Corps harmonized together in a sudden crescendo. "And you'll never hear see your arrow fly to the BLUE CORN MOON, for whether we have a bronze or silver pin! We need to sing with all the voices of the RANGERS! We need to move with all the shadows and the wind!"
A lone violin played. Then Halt sang gruffly, "You can own the Earth and still, all you'll own is Earth until you can move with all the shadows and the-"
He paused for dramatic effect. Halt opened his mouth for the final word. All that came out was a squeak.
Then Gilan decided to announce, "Either Halt's lost his voice or he's decided to start speaking chipmunk,"
Well, that was FUN to write! Praise is welcomed :) Constructive criticism is accepted. Laughs are mandatory :D The part about the basses actually happened in orchestra, and the last line is a quote by ME! YAY!
PS: Reviews are nice…