Sleep. It's such a strange word, isn't it? It can cause a blissful feeling and can cause tears. It can drive someone to go insane. I never thought about the word until these past couple of days. My attendant has told me that I've been sleepwalking. There was something in her eyes that told me that she was hiding something. I must have been doing or saying other things. I sat on my bed, lonely that my husband was busy with some imbecile war. Was I the one who had caused this war? I didn't kill King Duncan though. It was my husband, Macbeth. He did the deed. I just planted the idea in his small brain of his. He would never get to where he is without me. He would never have this power… all this fortune.
I pushed these seemingly angry thoughts to the back of my mind as I got up and sat in front of my vanity. My light green eyes just seemed to stare blankly back at me. I had looked like I had aged ten years. I was starting to get little grey hairs and there were dark bags around my eyes. Were these bags trying to tell me something? Should I come clean and lose my crown? No! I worked hard to get this crown! I couldn't now! I looked down at my hands… they looked to be stained with blood. They were clean a minute ago, weren't they? My eyes got wide and I headed into my washroom to clean my hands of this blood. The cold water froze my hands, but, the blood…
It wouldn't come off. I knew that no one could come into my room and see this. I locked the door and pushed my bookcase in front of it. How could I still have this blood on my hands? It wouldn't wash off…
It must have been my mind. Maybe I was sleep deprived. I laid back onto my bed, my reddish-brown hair seeming to spill all over the pillow. I turned onto my back and my eyelids seemed to weigh a thousand pounds. I quickly fell into a dream.
Dunsinane was in ruins. Buildings were now piles of rubble. I made my way through the town: every building was worse than the one before it. I finally made my way to the castle. It seems that I had walked in on the so- called 'loyal subjects' tearing down the castle. They were pounding in the stones that had held up the castle. "It's coming down!" Someone had yelled. The ones that were working on tearing this place down quickly backed up out of the way.
"Quickly, this way." I heard a man's voice whisper. I turned around and there wasn't anyone there. I knew that I had a puzzling look on my face. Was I losing my mind? I had made it this far. I couldn't afford to start losing my mind now. "Milady, my Lord, this way. You two can escape." It was like this voice should be coming from a person in front of me. I then looked towards the castle. I was hearing everything that the other me was hearing… I had to see where they were.
I caught a lucky break. I could see an older Macbeth and an older… me seemed to be climbing over the castle wall and down a ladder. I sprinted towards the castle wall and made my way towards the wall near them. I heard the small thump of feet hitting grass. The same sound was repeated soon after. "Faster!" I heard Macbeth hiss. They started running and I knew that the two of them were trying to get away from this. I could feel my own heart pounding and my breathing getting heavier. I realized that everything that happened to her… I could feel it.
"Macbeth, let's stop, please."
"We have to keep going. You said-"
"Forget everything that I said! All the things I said was to be in power. This power caused us to be chased out of the castle. We have to come clean." She wants to come clean? I would never do that. If Macbeth and were to come clean, we would be hanged for sure.
"We can't do that. We have to run." I could feel that she had grabbed his arm hard to keep him from leaving.
"Macbeth, please…" She felt so strong about this.
"I said… we're going." He had pulled away from her. She was staying there though. I could tell because I didn't feel that she was walking.
"No. I'm staying." It happened so fast. I felt this unbearable pain in my right side. It brought me to my knees. I knew that he had stabbed her. The pain shot through my body as I laid there. I think that he was twisting the knife because I felt like I couldn't breathe. I just laid there and my eyes closed.
When I woke up in my bed, I flashed my eyes open and breathed a sigh of relief. It was night though and a storm had come in. I could hear the heavy tapping of the rain against my window. The thunder boomed before the lightening lit up my entire room.
I thought about my life and what I did to be able to have this power. Power. It's funny what people will do for power. Some people will do anything… they would kill, maim, trick, deceit, and cheat. Some people want nothing to do with power. I honestly would like to be one of those people. I know what I did was wrong. I know that if the truth comes out, I would die. I sat up and I thought about coming clean. I couldn't ruin this for Macbeth. He was loved and respected by everyone in the kingdom. I ruined that. I feel like I ruined everything. It seems like Macbeth has a good grip on everything. I don't need this life. I want to better myself. If I come clean, then Macbeth and I will surely die. He can't die. Someone needs to be king. There has to be a way for me to get out of this life and for Macbeth to be king. There just has to be…
I had to go out for a walk. That's what I did whenever I needed a problem solved. I would just go walking. Once the storm had passed and I could see the full moon, I told my attendant that I was going for a walk. "Let me come with you." What harm could that do? I nodded my head.
We started down towards a path towards a place that was eerily familiar. It was quiet except for the sound of our footsteps. We stopped in front of this giant black iron gates. On top of the gates, it read 'Cemetery.' "I'll be right back." I didn't even give her a chance to disagree. I rushed in there so quickly so she couldn't stop me. I just started running in the cemetery so I could get away from my attendant. On the walk here, I realized that I didn't want this life anymore. I realized that I had to choose death over life. It would hurt Macbeth, but, it had to be done. I looked around for a specific tombstone. I stopped when I found it. It was a fresher grave than the ones around. 'Here Lies King Duncan'. That's when I knew that I found. I kneeled next to it.
I took out the dagger that Macbeth had given me for protection. "I'm sorry," I whispered before plunging the dagger in my chest. I gasped in pain as I kneeled up against the grave, slowly bleeding out… dying.
I always wonder how Macbeth reacted to the news of my death. Death. Such a strange thing, isn't it? Most people fear it. Some wait for it. Some can't wait for it. It's funny how three things can shape and… change people for the better or the worse. It sure changed me for the worse.