Ok, first fanfic! Yay! Just so everyone knows, this chapter is just to see if anyone likes the story. It isn't meant to be interesting yet… and it's not meant to be a high school drama. Just starts out like one…
This is a redo of my recently uploaded chapter. Thx goes to Tina Tissue for pointing a few things out!
I need constructive criticism… badly…
Lombaxes are made and owned by Insomniac.
"Ok class, listen up!" yelled a crème coloured lombax in a long, typical science lab coat. She leaned on her desk and looked around the class with a frightful eye and slowly walked towards a young blue male lombax asleep on his desk. She then pulled out a long ruler from her pocket and hit his desk with a loud thump, jolting the boy awake.
"That includes you Griddo," She leaned forwards and gave him one of her legendary stares.
Sweating slightly, Griddo smiled cheekily." I'm awake Ms Jasin." He said quietly.
She started circling the desk. I was at the back, as usual, quietly awaiting the lesson and wondering why Ms Jasin seemed so eager to talk. My imaginative and curious lombax mind was buzzing with good and bad thoughts. She hated our class. Scratch that, she hated our generation in general. How could I blame her? The fashion these days is dyeing your fur fluoro. I am proud to be my natural golden colour.
"Guess what we're talking about today class," she said with a devilish grin. "Now this is something that none of you have seen, but, I hope one day you will."
A murmur went through the classroom as she started preparing the holo-projector. Naturally everyone was curious as to why the usually cranky Ms Jasin was smiling, even if it was an evil smile. My stomach lurched at the idea of some crazy final year experiment for us grade 15's. According to history books, the grading system use to only go to year 12… Stupid engineering reputation…
My thoughts went back to the class at the sound of Ms Jasin humming while the holo- projector turned on. I giggled inside a bit. It was strange for us, having a happy Ms Jasin. Something told me this was either going to be an amazing talk, or something absolutely horrifying.
The holo-projector started up, and the image on the screen in front of us made the whole class, even the lombaxes that hated science gaped in wonder and amazement. The image itself couldn't have been real. It was like a black canvas covered with sparkling silver glitter. My hands began to fidget nervously as I wondered what it was and why Ms Jasin showed it to us.
Ms Jasin herself was looking around the class fairly amused. She waited a while to let the image sink into our heads before continuing.
"Class," she said. "Can someone tell me what this is?"
A green lombax with rectangular glasses, raised his hand. "Marcus," said Ms Jasin
"I think my guess is as good as everyone else's," he explained. "But, is it a black canvas with silver glitter on it?"
This made the class burst out laughing, including myself. Everyone must have been thinking the same thing. Ms Jasin must have picked up on it because she joined in on our laughter.
"No Marcus, but good try. This class is a star cluster, they existed in our home dimension," she replied, her eyes saddening.
This silenced the class. No one knew much about our home dimension, except the lombaxes who use to live there, of course. I heard the home dimension was a big round thing called a 'planet', which is very different from the floating rock I have grown up on. There were many other 'planets' that you could travel to and you could learn about each unique planet.
After a moment of silence, a thought came to my mind and I raised my hand in a failed attempt to ease the tension. I hated tension.
"Yes, Aradia," said Ms Jasin, her eyes not meeting mine.
"If that is a star cluster, then is one of those sparkling things a star? If that's the case, then what is a star?" I asked. The tension eased and we went back to the lesson.
Ms Jasin pulled herself together and, gratefully, answered my questions.
"Well done, Aradia for pointing that out to the class. Yes, one of those sparkling things is a star. A star is a giant ball of gas that has collected things, such as moon rock and raritanium, over the course of millions of years," she explained as the scientist within her came out. Everyone else scrambled for their paper and pens and quickly took messy notes.
"A star can be seen from every planet, moon, asteroid and floating space rock. There are no known stars in this dimension."
An annoying tune was then heard. It sounded more like a mobile phone but this annoying tune was our school bell. The principal had bad taste.
"Must be a shortened lesson today…" muttered Ms Jasin. "In that case, class dismissed." She signalled with a shooing motion.
I quickly got my things together before heading out the class. I have never had a class with so much tension before…
In the home dimension, there were many different schools and universities where a lombax could have their education. Each school was ranked at a certain level in different career areas and the average lombax had to try and get into the best high school possible for their chosen field of study.
That's what my history books say…
This day and age there is one primary school, one high school and one university throughout the whole dimension. And because of this I have to bump into multi-coloured lombaxes every day and attempt to not stand out. This is tough when you're the only one who is not fluoro and especially when your within eye range of the lovely Priscilla Deveron. With all her fashionable clothes, such as sky high heels and her short slutty yellow dress covered in expensive pins, and her bright pink fur, the same colour as her hair, that has changed colour more times then I care to count.
Naturally, she was glaring evilly at me along with her multi-coloured cohorts as I tried to quietly make my way through the crowded halls of Kaden High, supposably named after an intelligent hero. I wasn't far from the exit… and then she walked over.
I slightly quickened my pace and pretended that I hadn't noticed her. That's when I felt her hand on my shoulder.
"Going somewhere, Aradia? You're looking bland as always," she said. Her voice sounded like honey, thick and sweet with a slight taste of evil. She turned me around and made me look her in the eye
"I have to get home," I told her bluntly and tried to turn back towards the door, only to meet the faces of her cohorts.
"You say that every afternoon. Don't you have a life?" she asked. Her cohorts all glared at me in unison. I swear they'll be great on the synchronised swim team.
"Sure, I do. I have several. You can borrow one, but, make sure you bring it back tomorrow. I collect them you know," I told her sarcastically. Judging from the fumes coming out of her head, I take it she didn't like that comeback very much. Inside, I did a little victory dance.
"Just because you have brains doesn't mean you should use them," she retorted. She swayed her hips to the side showing off her attitude.
"Then what are they meant for? Look, I don't have time for this. I really got to go," and having said that, I turned my back on them and left. What a great way to end a day of school.
I rushed out on the sandy street and began walking home. One of my hands found its way to my dark brown hair. It made me think. Was I really bland? I admit, I'm a science freak with way big an interest in engineering. I refused to dye my fur or get contacts to change the colour of my light blue eyes. Did this make me bland?
Home was as it usually was. It was pretty, I guess, with white walls and no windows, as defence from the desert heat, and beautiful desert flowers covering the garden in front of it. Mum really out did herself when she designed this place. I felt nervous; I had a question that I wanted to ask my parents tonight. Something I never dared asked. In fact, I think this question has become taboo in my generation as a whole.
Walking in I heard the cry of my little brother, Javen, running around pretending to shoot at evil forces. Note to self: avoid the living room.
"Aradia, knock before you come in!" yelled a feminine voice from the kitchen. Smelled like Lyncha worms… again… On this floating desert rock, it's the only meat you will find. Makes me wonder what lombaxes use to eat.
"Hi, Mum!" I called back. I dumped my bag near the door, as is the standard procedure, before hearing something that I shouldn't have been hearing until seven that night. Dad's hovercar has just parked outside. He's never home early…
Few moments passed and a golden lombax, with black stripes, walked in through the front door. His face looked hardened as if something bad had happened. My father was General Vadin, a three bolt official in the council; he has to deal with the occasional man-eating snakes that come by every now and again. He leads the forces against them and cleans the leftovers up. That, and he is constantly filling out paper work. He is never home early.
My father's eyes seemed distant; I might have to leave that question for another night.
"Hey, Dad!" I greeted trying to break the tension for the second time today. I smiled, to aid my cause.
He looked at me and returned the smile. "Aradia, I need you to give your science teacher something for me. She goes by the name of Ms Jasin. It's vital you get it to her. Kay?"
"Sure, "I replied.
My dad then pulled out an envelope from his back pocket and handed it to me.
"Makes sure she gets in ASAP," he said sternly.
That was when we heard the traditional 'Dinner's ready!' from mum. Dad walked slowly into the kitchen while I stood there, looking at the envelope addressed to our science teacher, with the Praetorian Guard's symbol on it.
Is it okay? It's short, but I think it's okay for my first chapter. Ratchet will appear later on in the story and Priscilla will become more important later on…
The note will also contain an added shocker…
Hope you liked it so far!