Hey guys! I am finally back in business! I know I still have another story that I need to get to, but this idea came to me while I was in the shower (that seems to be where all my ideas come from) and I just had to write it down.
It's a LOT longer than I originally anticipated, so I apologize for that.
It's an AU involving the storyline people have created around Brittany, Santana, and Sugar. If you are unaware of this storyline you need to familiarize yourselves immediately. I suggest you go on tumblr, look at every blog in the Brittana fandom, and don't come out until you know it better than you know the back of your hand. It will also help you understand where I'm coming from a little bit better.
I'd like to take a quick second to thank DaynaaK for being such a HUGE help with this writing process, and to her and killercereal for liking the idea and basically forcing me to write it.
Characters are not mine. Main idea is also not mine. Incorporating it into this story is mine. Anyway, enjoy the show!
Santana Lopez had a love-hate relationship when it came to lockers. Specifically her own. She loved it because it was where Brittany told her multiple times that she loved her, and it was where she was able rekindle her friendship with the taller girl so they could ultimately go back to the way things used to be between them. She hated her locker because it was where Brittany justifiably called her out as being a coward, and it was where she had her heart shattered so badly she was positive it would never work again. Each day her locker brought on a different emotion caused by a new situation, and as Santana Lopez made her way to her "frenemy" she could only guess what today's circumstance was going to bring.
As the two cheerleaders walked hand in hand down the hall towards their lockers, Santana couldn't help but note all the quizzical looks that were cast in their direction. Under normal circumstances she would have chalked it up to the fact that her and Brittany were by far the most powerful people at William McKinley High School. But the circumstances were not normal. They hadn't been; not for two weeks. Not ever since Finn practically shoved Santana out of the closet and forced her to go public with her relationship with Brittany. Ever since that horrendous day, she noticed more and more people gathering up the courage to sneak a peak at whatever her and Brittany were doing at the moment. Santana usually wasn't one to shy away from attention, however, this was one kind of attention she most certainly could do without.
Santana was so caught up in her own little world of wondering just how many people were staring at her that she didn't realize she was at her locker until a soft voice spoke louder than the chaos inside her brain.
"San?" Brittany pouted. "I can't remember my locker combination."
"Ugh. Scoot over you goof," Santana groaned, rolling her eyes with feigned exasperation. She willingly stepped in front of Brittany and began fiddling with the lock.
As Santana concentrated on opening the blonde's locker, Brittany wrapped her arms around Santana's waist and nuzzled her chin on the smaller girl's shoulder while she waited. She felt Santana relax into the embrace, making her blue eyes close contently from the warmth and stability Santana's body brought to her when they were connected like this.
"Here ya go, babe. All set," Santana's words pulled Brittany back from the only escape she ever had from the outside world, forcing her to face the harsh conditions of reality. Though that didn't stop the broad grin from plastering itself on her pale skin.
"Thanks! You're the best!" Brittany declared before planting a kiss in the crook of Santana's neck.
There it is again, she thought as her heart sank instantly.
It was quick, and it was subtle, but she felt it. Shoulder muscles stiffening. The sharp intake of breath. A swift reminder that whatever she was doing was not sitting well with Santana. But before Brittany could do anything about the situation, the brunette was already pulling away to focus on her own locker.
"So. How was dinner last night?" Santana asked, her voice void of any interest.
Brittany only shrugged as she pulled out a notebook covered in rainbow stickers, "Okay I guess. We had mac and cheese. Nothing special. It wasn't even the shaped noodles."
"Well that's lame."
"Do you have everything you need for you next class?"
"I think so." Brittany began counting off on her fingers, "I've got my notebook, extra pens, my textbook, and my cell phone in case there's a fire and I need to call you."
"Perfect. And where are you going to meet me before we go to lunch?"
"Directly outside my classroom door."
"And what aren't you going to do?"
"Talk to the kid that Kurt says smells homeless."
"That's my girl," Santana couldn't prevent a smile from dancing across her lips as she took in the gorgeous sight in front of her even if she tried. "Now give me one of your amazing hugs before you go, cause you know I can't concentrate without one."
Brittany giggled as she threw her arms around her girlfriend and squeezed the smaller girl as tightly, and as delicately, as she could. Both wanted the moment to last an eternity, but all too soon they had to pull apart to go their separate ways. But before Santana could detach herself completely, Brittany made a final, rash decision and leaned in until their lips crashed together.
"Jesus, Britt!" Santana hissed, jerking her head back violently the second their mouths made contact. She feverishly looked around everywhere in order to scan the surrounding hall. "Are you trying to start a riot?"
The blonde only stood there, her mouth hanging open, while Santana wordlessly turned back to her locker and closed it. Once she was able to regain her composure, Brittany snapped, "Are you done?"
"With what?" Santana asked, her focus solely on the contents within her backpack.
"Being ashamed that I am your girlfriend."
The venom laced within Brittany's words startled Santana into a consciousness she hadn't realized she lost. When she looked up from her backpack she expected to be met with gorgeous blue eyes marred with tears, but all she saw was the back of another student. Santana became acutely aware of the sound of receding footsteps behind her and turned around just in time to catch Brittany storming down the hallway.
"Brittany!" Santana called after the retreating girl. "Brittany WAIT!" Frustrated, the brunette took off into a run, her shorter legs having to work extra hard to catch up with the taller girl.
God dammit! I fucking hate my locker! She thought as she rounded a corner, nearly knocking down a math teacher in the process.
Despite the fact that she was sprinting faster than she ever did for Coach Sylvester, Santana quickly lost sight of Brittany. Though she wasn't too concerned. The dancer always went to the same classroom whenever she was upset. It was the only other place she admitted to ever feeing safe in (the first being when she was in Santana's arms). It wasn't long before Santana found herself sitting cross-legged on the floor of the choir room, trying to coax Brittany's head out of her hands so they could talk.
"Britt come on," the brunette pleaded. "Britt-Britt, please talk to me. Look, I'm sorry," she sighed as she squeezed the bridge of her nose in frustration. "Brittany would you please just look at me so I can fix whatever it is I've done wrong?"
When Brittany refused to lift her head and acknowledge anyone was speaking to her, Santana leaned forward so her breath tickled the dancer's ear. "Pleeeeeeaaaase babe? I'll let you bring that rubber duck in our bath tonight if you talk to me," she whispered seductively.
Unfortunately her tactics had the complete opposite affect than what she was hoping for. Rather than smiling shyly and giving into temptation like Santana thought she would, Brittany lunged backwards, her blue eyes thick with fury.
"Don't!" she spat, holding her hands up to prevent Santana from advancing any further.
"Don't what? !"
"Don't pretend like you care now just because no one is around. Don't pretend that you love me now, just because we don't have an audience."
"What the hell are you talking about? !" Santana's own voice rose to match the anger in Brittany's.
"What am I talking about? ! I'm talking about the fact that you have absolutely no problem being sexy with me when no one is watching, but the moment there are other people around you get paranoid. You're fine around people when I'm just holding your hand or if we're only cuddling, but if I ever try to kiss you, you practically give yourself whiplash trying to avoid it! You NEVER want to kiss me in public because you're always afraid someone will see!"
"That's because I am scared, Brittany!"
"But that's exactly the problem, Santana! You're always scared! You're always scared someone is going to see what we're doing together and you're always scared they're going to say something to you or about you. You're always more concerned about what other people think and I'm always the one who comes up short in this relationship! I'm always the one who has to deal with a girlfriend who's too ashamed to be open with me because she's too busy caring more about how everyone else looks at her rather than about doing the things that makes her happy."
Santana opened her mouth to interject, but Brittany cut her off before any sound could make it passed her throat.
"In the beginning I was able to handle it because I knew you had to take things at your own speed. I realized this whole coming out thing was incredibly hard for you. And I still do. Probably more than anyone. That's why I would you decide what people saw and what they didn't see. I even let you put a friggin' napkin over our hands at Breadstix because I knew it would make you feel more comfortable! A NAPKIN! I looked like an idiot so you didn't think you had to. But that was two weeks ago, Santana! Two weeks! Two weeks and you still cringe every time I get close to you in public! How much longer is this gonna go on for? How much longer are you going to be scared? How much longer until you finally decide you're not afraid to love me outside of an empty room? How much longer Santana? !"
"I don't know!" the smaller girl all but screamed. Tears were starting to prick at her eyes and she could see the same happening to the girl opposite her. "I don't know, Brittany! Okay? ! I don't. fucking. KNOW!"
"Well you better figure it out soon because I'm tired of this! I'm so –" the Dutch girl collapsed on herself, allowing her shoulders to crack under the weight she's been carrying around for a whole lot longer than two weeks. "I'm tired, Santana," she sighed, her gaze fixated on the tile beneath her. "And I don't know if I can take it anymore. I don't know if being your girlfriend is worth the heartache I get every time you check over your shoulder to make sure no one's watching us. I'm sorry. I just… I can't take it anymore."
Santana felt her breath hitch at the words spoken to her. She swallowed the lump that was growing rapidly in her throat and was barely able to get her own words passed the ever building tears that were threatening to spew over at any moment. "Are you… you're not breaking up with me… are you? I mean you can't! Please."
Brittany just found the strength she needed in order to lift her eyes to the broken face beside her. Unable to handle Santana's silent plea any longer, she closed her eyes and shook her head sadly, "I –"
"NO!" a frantic voice yelped from the doorway.
The cheerleaders both jumped and shifted their gaze just in time to see one of the newest members of the Glee club, Sugar Motta, come barreling into the choir room; tripping over an abandoned bongo drum in the process.
"STOP!"' she shrieked as she struggled to regain her footing.
"What the hell? !" Santana snapped as she quickly wiped away any sign that she might have been crying.
"Stop what you're doing right now! Shut everything down! Cease fire! You can't break up! You don't know what's at stake here! Yell at each other all you want, but whatever you do, do not break up!" Sugar begged.
"Were you outside listening to our conversation? !" Santana yelled, completely appalled.
Sugar nodded in confirmation, "Yes, and I'm sorry. I saw what happened in the hall and then I overheard you yelling at each other and… you CAN'T break up! I don't know how else you want me to say it!" Layer upon layer of desperation coated her voice with every passing word. "I could try saying it in Spanish for you if that would work better."
"Listen richy bitch –"
"No! You listen! You can't break up because you two are in love!"
"Oh really? Why don't you alert the media? !"
"Because they'll only ruin it. This is your love. And not just the sappy, cliché kind of love that they put in movies. The real kind of love. The kind - " Sugar was momentarily taken aback when Santana snorted, but she kept going, "- that makes your hearts swell when you're together and break when you're apart. The kind of love that makes you tingle in all the places you didn't even know could tingle! You guys have been head over heels in love ever since the moment you first laid eyes on each other and you find more things to love about one another every single day. No one can fully comprehend just how much you two love each other. Not even me, even though you guys tell how amazing your love is all the time!"
"Wait… We do?" Brittany scrunched her brow in confusion at Sugar's statement. She took note of hazel eyes widening in shock for a split second before returning to their previous expression. The whole ordeal was faster than the blink of an eye, however Brittany had become somewhat of a pro when it came to abrupt changes in demeanor. Santana always did the exact same thing whenever she was caught off guard, and the dancer could spot it a mile away.
"No! We don't, Britt." Santana refused to look away from the frozen girl in front of her. "We don't tell her anything. We don't even know her. Fuck, I only speak to her when she's getting on my nerves. She's just saying this shit cause she's mental!"
"I'm not mental! And you do tell me! Well, I mean you don't... r-really tell me… I mean…" Even though Sugar was able to mask the trauma from slipping up on her face, she was unable to disguise the tremor in her voice. "I just… I can tell from wha-what I see… cause like…"
"Spit it out Radio!" Santana was beyond the point of agitation. "Are you fucking stalking us or something?"
"NO!" Sugar cried. "No not at all! It's just that… I notice how you act around each other in Glee rehearsal. That's all. I see how you look at one another and I know how much you're in love. Which is why you can't break up! You guys need to be together - "
"Stop talking. Right now. You have no right coming in here pretending like you know everything about us. Because you don't. Come on Britt. Let's go before insanity rubs off on us too."
Sugar watched, mortified, as Santana started to get up and bring Brittany with her. She knew it was time to bring out the big guns. "STOP!" she screamed, stepping forward to block the girls from their escape.
The impact of being screamed at was enough to force Santana to sit back down (if only for a second to get passed the ringing in her ears).
"Things are changing, you guys! I promise. Everything is going to change so much in the future, and you need to be able to see those changes together."
"What in God's name are you yammering about? You have no idea what the future's going to be like."
"Santana, you're always talking about how people have this hatred towards gay relationships and how the majority of the world doesn't accept you. But guess what! All that is going to change! People will accept you. They'll see that you two are no different than any other heterosexual relationship and they'll accept you for who you are. No one's going to care anymore about who you are attracted to. The only thing that will matter is who you fall in love with. People will become so accepting, in fact, that Ohio is going to legalize gay marriage in about…" Sugar raised her wrist and looked down at her watch, "five years! And you need to be together to see that happen because you're going to get married!"
"Really? !" Brittany gasped.
"Yes. You're going to get married in the church you've always dreamed of getting married in. And because you two are the absolute cutest people I have ever met in my entire life, you're going to wear your wedding rings on your pinky fingers because that one means more to you than your ring fingers. Everyone from the Glee club will be there and Rachel is going to help you write your vows. Who, by the way, you should really start being nicer to because as long as you remain friends with Quinn, Rachel will always be a part of your lives whether you like it or not. And after the ceremony, Dave Karofsky of all people will sign as your witness."
If it was at all possible, Brittany's brow scrunched further together and she cocked her head to the side. "How do you know about Dave?"
"What? No that's not the point," Sugar waved her hand, hoping the topic of Dave Karofsky would be pushed aside with the motion. "The point is you guys are perfect for each other, and you're going to get married, and you're going to have a beautiful, smart, incredibly bright daughter. A daughter who loves you both more than anything else in the world."
For the first time since entering the choir room, Brittany sat up straighter and allowed her lips to curl into the slightest of smiles. "We are?"
"Oh god Britt," Santana rolled her eyes and nearly gagged. "You're not seriously listening to Forrest Gump over here, are you?"
Ignoring the brunette's comment, but still keeping her eyes locked on Santana, Sugar responded viciously, "Yes! You are," before returning her attention back to Brittany. "And you are going to come up with the most ridiculous baby name for her, but because you," she said, turning to Santana again, "are so incredibly whipped, you agree to it after only five minutes of arguing. But your daughter will love her name because it came from you guys. Your daughter loves that she came from you, that she's yours. She loves everything about you."
"Okay," Santana said as she held up a finger in defiance. "Not that I didn't before, but now I know this is complete bullshit. Because I am never going to be a mother. There's no way in hell I'm going to deal with a whiney, snot nosed brat who takes up all my income. And who the fuck are you to be telling me otherwise?"
"You're wrong though. That's what you think now. You don't want a child because you think that you're going to be a terrible mother. You're just afraid you'll end up like your own-"
"You don't know shit about what I think!"
"But you change your mind after watching Brittany interact for so long with other children. You realize you want to have kids more than anything just so you can see the light Brittany gets in her eyes when she accomplishes something spectacular. So you finally decide to have a child. And you know what happens? You become the best mom in the entire world. You both do." Sugar looked over at Brittany to determine whether or not she had permission to continue speaking. When the blonde gave a tiny nod that anyone but Santana would have missed, Sugar went on. "You two are incredible. You devote your lives to your daughter. You go to every soccer game, every dance recital, every competition for her debate team. You even let Rachel give her voice lessons because she wanted them. You always kiss her goodnight, and tuck her in, and tell her a bedtime story before she goes to sleep. And sometimes, if she's extra good, you'll sing for her. Her favorite is going to be 'Songbird' and would listen to it every second of every day if she could. And when Santana's not around she loves to make Brittany sing 'My Cup'."
"What the fuck? !" Santana shouted. "You actually fucking are stalking us!"
It was now Sugar's turn to roll her eyes as she tilted her head back and groaned in frustration. "Will you just shut up and listen to me for like... TWO seconds? !"
Due to some extraneous force Santana has only ever encountered when she was getting yelled at by Brittany, she clamped her mouth shut and bowed her head in embarrassment to let the flustered girl carry on where she left off.
"And even though Santana will always tell Brittany that song is inappropriate, she'll sing it anyway because your daughter asked her to. She will do anything for her daughter. You both will. Because your daughter is going to have you wrapped around her little finger tighter than you are wrapped around each other's. She means everything to you, just as you mean everything to her. You're always there for one another whenever someone needs guidance, a shoulder to cry on, or if they need to get them out of a sticky situation - which happens a lot so you better brace yourselves. But no matter what, you guys are a family that sticks together through anything.
"But even still, your daughter is afraid she is going to lose both of you. Because even though you both love each other and need each other more than you need your next breath of air, you're going to argue. A lot. In the beginning you'll only have small quarrels here and there, but eventually they turn into full-blown fights. Not physical. But enough to terrify your daughter."
Brittany, whose gaze has reverted back to the tiles on the floor, whispers in a timid voice, "What do we fight about?"
Sugar mimics the dancer's position and responds in a tone practically identical to the one spoken before her, "How, even after all those years, Santana is still afraid to express her love for you outside the comfort of your own home. She's not the same when there are other people around. The insecurities from high school don't go away, and it becomes too much for you to handle."
While Sugar spoke, Santana chanced a glimpse towards the blonde beside her and immediately wished she hadn't. Though Brittany's head was still cast downwards, Santana could see blue eyes glazing over with tears as the Dutch girl willed herself not to cry. The sight of seeing Brittany hurting, and knowing she had caused that hurt (even if it was done through a completely made up story), was enough to cause the brunette to loath every ounce of her being. Santana continued to sink deeper and deeper into self-hatred until Sugar's voice brought her back to reality.
" – and frankly, no one cares. No one cares who you're with. But no matter how many times Brittany tries to tell you this, you still focus too much on what other people think. And you need to get over that, Santana. You need to!" Sugar's breathing began to quicken again and the manner of her voice inched back to the hysterics it left behind. "You need to stop being such a coward and show Brittany you love her more than life itself. You need to sweep her off her feet, cradle her in your arms, and kiss her on the lips in public just like you do when you're alone. You need to show her how much she means to you while you have the chance because you're running out of time!"
As the last sentence crossed her lips, Sugar's voiced cracked. She stopped speaking and closed her eyes, forcing herself to take a couple of deep breaths in order to suppress the rage that was building up inside her; a trait she definitely got from her mamá (though most people tell her she has her mommy's personality and her mamá's looks).
When Sugar trusted herself to continue without ripping Santana's head off in the process, she slowly looked up again in order to stare deep into dark brown eyes – so brown they were almost black – and warned Santana through clenched teeth, "You're running out of time, Santana. Brittany's not going to be in your life for forever and you need to tell her how much you can't live without her. You need to know you spent your time with her exactly the way you wanted to. No regrets. Because otherwise, the guilt of always being afraid, and of always hiding your relationship, is going to eat away at you until there is nothing left. It will slowly destroy you, and in turn, your daughter. And you can't do that. Not to someone who loves you as much as she does. Being forced to watch you slip away from her, one day at a time, is going to be the worst form of torture she can ever imagine. Please don't make her lose her family, please," Sugar begged.
Santana didn't realize she was slightly crying – an act she never would have resorted to had they been talking about anyone else besides Brittany – until she tasted the salt from her tears when she opened her mouth to try and say something. "I… I don't…"
"Just please love Brittany as much as you can for as long as you can. No matter where you are or who is watching. You two are the perfect couple and you deserve to be happy. And you make each other happy. You just have to make sure you always show it. Both of you."
She no longer needed to turn her head from one cheerleader to the other for they were now a single unit. Halfway through Sugar's speech, Santana had pulled Brittany onto her lap and intertwined their fingers together while Brittany cradled her head on the smaller girl's shoulder. Within seconds their breathing synched together and their heartbeats lined up to form a steady rhythm. They were now staring at the newcomer with fascination and bewilderment. Though the two girls didn't have a single clue as to what was happening before them, neither was able to gather up the need to stop Sugar from speaking any further.
"I know it's hard, having to let go of your insecurities and let them fly out the window like they never existed. Everything is happening way too quickly for you in a world that's not ready to keep up. So I get that being completely confident about your sexuality around strangers might not be something you're fully going to be able to do. But if there is one thing that I need you to make sure you do above anything else," Sugar cautioned as she took a step forward and burned the importance of her request into Santana's skin, "even if you are never fully able to express your love for Brittany the same way in public as you do at home, I need you to make sure that Brittany never takes a single cooking class in her entire life. Ever."
The brunette couldn't help the suppress the laugh that escaped at Sugar's demand. "Obviously you don't know Brittany because otherwise you'd know that this never going to be a problem. She hates cooking. Recipes are too confusing for her and she cries every time she has to crack an egg."
"It's true," Brittany nodded in agreement.
Sugar shook her head, desperate for them to listen to her, "No it's not! Not for long. She's going to want to start cooking dinner because she feels bad that you always have to make it. She's going to come home one day and she's going to tell you she wants to start taking cooking classes. But you can't let her. Come up with an excuse. Tell her it's too expensive. Tell her the teacher kills unicorns in her free time. Teach her yourself if you have to. I don't care what you have to do. Just make sure she does not take a cooking class. Promise me you won't let her. Promise me you'll say no when the time comes."
"Why are you so bent out of shape about this?"
"PROMISE ME!" Sugar screamed.
"Okay, okay! Calmate loca," Santana held up her hands in defense. "If it'll make you leave us alone and stop acting like a crazy person then, yes, I promise I will never let Britt take any cooking classes. But it's going to be your fault if she makes dinner one day and I end up keeling over onto my plate. If that happens then I swear to God I will haunt the shit out of you."
"I think I can handle that," Sugar smiled, relief flooding her face. "And you!" she lectured, making eye contact with Brittany. "You better not get any ideas of surprising Santana with your new found cooking skills by taking classes in private. If you feel like you want to take a cooking class you better tell her before you sign up for one so she can say no. Do you understand?"
"Yes ma'am!" Brittany saluted.
"And you absolutely promise you're going to tell her?"
"Good," Sugar let out a breath of air, releasing her distress with it and allowed her shoulders to relax. "Thanks for listening. Sorry for the interruption. You two just carry on being the greatest love birds of all time. Pretend I was never even here."
She turned on her heels and took two steps before whirling back around to face the girls who were already lost in each other's eyes. A knowing grin was plastered on her face and she raised an eyebrow in accusation, "Oh and Santana? You should really give your locker a chance. You never know. It might become extremely valuable to your relationship with Brittany one day." And with that she skipped out of the room.
Though not before hearing a rather confused brunette ask, "Seriously? Like what in the actual fuck just happened?"
"Sorry!" Sugar called over her shoulder from the doorway. "Asperger's!"
"See?" she could hear Brittany say. "She's always saying crazy stuff."
"Yeah… But never that crazy…"
Sugar chuckled to herself as she leaned against the wall outside the choir room and listened to what was being said inside. It only took her a whole three seconds until she realized their conversation was definitely not meant for her ears; though that didn't stop her from listening. As much as she wanted to remain a fly on the wall and make sure everything worked out how it was supposed to, she suddenly became very aware of the heavy weight pressed securely to her chest. She hesitantly reached up and tugged on a golden chain hanging from her neck and pulled a gold locket out from underneath her shirt. With a shaky hand, Sugar carefully opened the pendant and studied the only personal object she brought with her so she could keep track of home. Running a delicate thumb across the content inside she allowed the first of many tears she'd been holding back fall.
Staring back at her were two sets of eyes: one hazel and one so brown they were almost black. Both sets were vacant and entirely drained of life even though their owners were smiling. Sugar was unable to prevent her heart from constricting in a pain so great it forced her to the ground. She knew why they were so listless, so removed from the rest of the world. It was because another set of eyes was missing from the picture. Eyes so blue even God himself couldn't have created a more perfect color. Or at least that's what her mamá tells her.
The picture wouldn't have looked the way it did if those blue eyes were in there with them. But they weren't. Sugar hadn't seen those eyes since she was thirteen. Not for real. At least not the ones that recognized her anyway. How she missed those eyes. She missed the way they sparkled with pride whenever Sugar came home with an A on her report card. She missed they way they scrunched together if her mamá did something wrong. And she missed the way they could make anyone's day a million times better with just one look of them.
The owner of those eyes had the ability to make any person – no matter how upset – feel happy. All she had to do was say one of her seemingly pointless phrases that only Sugar and her mamá understood, or start dancing. Because if there was one thing Sugar's mommy was able to do better than anyone else in the world, it was dance. It was almost as if she was weightless; gliding and twirling in one fluid, effortless motion. And sometimes, if Sugar was lucky, her mommy would pick her up and spin her around until they were both so dizzy they couldn't even stand. All the while her mamá would stand off to the side, laughing as if she were witnessing the most absurd thing in the world.
But it wasn't absurd. The moments when her moms were laughing and loving and spinning her around were the happiest moments of Sugar's life. Moments she hasn't had in a very long time. Not since the night her mommy was killed in a car crash on her way home from class. Ever since that day, her mamá stopped laughing. She stopped doing a lot of things for that matter. She stopped talking, stopped eating, and stopped taking care of herself altogether. What was once full, shiny black hair that hung freely around her shoulders was now pulled back in a tight bun; strands of gray peaking out too soon for her age. Her tan skin no longer held the youthful glow it did for as long as Sugar could remember. Instead it was pale, almost as pale as the skin her mommy used to have.
Things were so much better when her mommy was alive. Everything in the world was right when she had her mommy by her side. Her mommy made her feel like she could take on the world. Now she just felt empty and alone.
Sugar no longer tried to stop the steady river of tears from streaming down her face. She was going to cry. She forced herself to hold it in long enough to be strong for her mamá. But now it was her time to cry. Clutching her locket tightly in her hand she pressed it firmly to her chest, letting the silent sobs overtake her for as long as she'd let them. When she felt she had allowed herself enough time to be sad, Sugar unclenched her hand in order to close the locket and shut away the sorrow it brought with it. As she took one last look at the picture she noticed a change beginning to occur within it.
It was small at first, so small that Sugar had to stop breathing in order to make sure she was actually seeing it. But as the seconds dragged on, she knew could clearly see the change happening right before her eyes. Her heart skipped multiple beats before settling on a very erratic rhythm and she found herself laughing as she brought her hand up to cover her mouth.
"Oh my god," she laughed again, running her fingers through her hair she tilted her head back until it made contact with the wall. "It worked. I can't believe it actually fucking worked!"
Once the dizziness set on from an overwhelming amount of joy subsided, Sugar again took note of the picture in her hand. To her absolute relief, she was staring at a completely different picture than the one she had originally put in her locket. It was still a picture of her and her mamá, and they were still smiling, but in this new picture their eyes were smiling too. Both sets of eyes were sparkling and Sugar's mamá was actually laughing. Not the fake laugh she miserably attempted to pull off for years after their lives took a turn for the worst. But a real, genuine laugh. Her skin was glowing and her hair was free to fall around her shoulders, held back by a simple headband. Sugar was laughing too. They were finally happy again. Because they had their blue eyes again.
Standing behind Sugar, now occupying a once empty space, was her mommy. Her eyes were sparkling just as brightly as they used to and her long blonde hair was shining in the sun coming through the window. One arm held Sugar close while the other found it's way down to a tan pinky finger and gripped it tightly. They were all laughing and enjoying being together. They were a family again.
The picture Sugar now couldn't tear her gaze from told her she finally her family back. It told her she was finally ready to take on the world once more. It told her she finally had a reason to live again. The picture Sugar was now staring at told her she was going home to a wonderful future. And for that, she was ecstatic.
It also did a wonderful job at reassuring her that when she did return home she was most likely not going to be punished for stealing her mother's locker. And for that, she was eternally grateful.
Now that you've read everything, I can further explain my thought process. I loved the idea of Sugar going back to the past to fix the relationship of her moms, however I didn't agree with the idea that her sole purpose was to actually make sure they got together. They were obviously going to become a couple on their own, but I saw her going back to make sure she extinguished any problems at the source. If that makes sense.
Please tell me what you think! I love any and all feedback, good or bad.