Disclaimer: *checks my birth certificate* Nope, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, at least not according to my birth certificate, so that means that sadly, Twilight isn't mine.
A/N: This was originally written for theonlykyla as part of a Secret Santa story exchange. I've changed the title from what it was originally posted as, and it may change one more time once I begin expanding this into a full length fic.
I say goodnight to our family as they leave the house, shutting and locking the door after they are gone. Making my way into the kitchen, I walk up behind Emmett as he is tidying up the kitchen and wrap my arms around him, kissing him along his neck.
"It was nice having dinner with everyone tonight. Especially with how busy we'll all be these next few weeks until Christmas," I murmur.
"Yes, it was," Em replies as he turns around in my arms and kisses me.
As our kiss deepens, my hips buck forward, allowing my own hardness to brush against Emmett's. Our hands roam frantically, tugging and pulling off each other's clothing, leaving a trail as we stumble our way towards the bedroom.
The bedroom door clicks behind us, and it's as if the sound of the door shutting fuels the desire between us. Our kisses become more intense as our hands continue their exploration over our now naked bodies. Before I even realize what's happening, Emmett pushes me to the bed, pinning me down as he hovers over me.
I can't contain the moan that escapes me as Emmett kisses and nips at my exposed flesh, every touch, every caress setting my body on fire. As he leaves a scorching trail of kisses down my body, I feel my desire building, my need for him increasing with each moment.
"Emmett, please…" I beg as I squirm on the bed, needing to find some sort of friction, some sort of release.
He continues his kisses along my inner thigh before I feel his tongue lick along the underside of my shaft before he takes me into his warm, wet mouth. He licks and sucks my cock before adding first one and then a second finger into my ass. His fingers work in tempo with his mouth as it works my cock. The sensations are all too much and I'm done for, already on the edge of cumming.
"Oh fuuuuuck, Em" I pant out. "So fucking good. Don't stop baby." I beg as my hands fist the sheets.
He continues, quickening his pace, grazing my shaft with his teeth, swirling his tongue around my head, and adding a third finger into my puckered hole. Without warning the fire building within me completely washes over me as my orgasm rocks through my body.
"FFUUUUUCKK babe" I cry out as my hands find purchase in his hair, holding his head in place as my hips thrust a few more times as I ride out my high.
I'm left panting and feeling utterly spent as Emmett kisses his way up my body to my mouth and kisses me deeply, the taste of myself on his tongue serving to reignite my desire. Breaking the connection, a wicked, yet oh so sexy smile creeps across his face as he tells me "I'm not done with you yet Jacob. The night has just begun."
Leaning down, he whispers into my ear, "Get on your knees Jake. I need to be inside you," before swiftly flipping me onto my stomach.
My body willingly obeys his command, my need to feel him moving within me taking control of my brain. I move into position on all fours as he reaches into the nightstand drawer for the lube. I feel the bed shift as he repositions himself behind me, and I can't help but wiggle my ass at him a bit, earning myself a smack on the behind, which elicits a moan from my mouth. Em always knows what I want and need.
Glancing over my shoulder, I groan as I see him stroking himself to spread the lube along his cock before placing his fingers at my entrance. Pushing them in and out of me for a moment, I can't help but push back as he enters me. Quickly, he removes his fingers, replacing them with the tip of his dick. Slowly, he enters me, and once he is fully inside, I let out a contented sigh, relishing the contented feeling that settles over me from being filled so completely by my lover.
Emmett starts thrusting in and out, slow at first, but as he continues, his pace quickens. Pounding into me, the only sounds between us are our grunts and groans as he continues to drive us both closer to the edge.
His one hand tightens its grip on my hip as his other snakes its way around to stroke my already leaking cock. The pleasure is too much, and my arms give out, my face lying flush with the bed as my ass is still up in the air.
"Feels so fucking good…so goddamn tight Jacob. So close babe…" Emmett moans out.
All I can manage in response is a whimper as Emmett's thrusts become more erratic before his release spills inside of me and after a final stroke of my cock, I'm sent into another orgasm of my own.
Collapsing onto the bed, Em pulls me into his embrace, peppering my face with gentle kisses.
"Mmmm, I love you Jake," he murmurs softly.
"I love you too Emmett," I reply as I snuggle into his arms.
After a few minutes, Em breaks the silence which has descended.
"You know babe, Christmas is only a few weeks away. Is there anything special you want?" he asks me.
I hesitate to respond. I know what I want…I've wanted it for a year now, but every time it comes up we just end up fighting. I don't want to fight with Emmett, I hate it whenever we do, but I deserve more. I deserve to be acknowledged. I'm tired of being a secret, of only our family knowing…of pretending.
"You know what I want Emmett," I sigh. "I want a marriage…with you…it's all I'll ever want."
The huff and groan from Emmett as he sits up in bed tells me that we're headed straight for another fight.
"You already know how I feel about that Jake. You know why we can't." Emmett's eyes beg me to understand his side, which I do, the only problem is…I don't think he's ever understood mine.
"I don't want to always be second place in your life." I hiss out. "I understood seven years ago when we first got together. I understood five years ago when you first ran for office, and I understood three years ago when you first got elected as governor…but dammit Em…things have changed, the laws have changed. We…I deserve more."
"I'm sorry Jake, but for now my mind is made up. I have goals, plans…the party chair already told me I was being considered for nomination for the presidency. I can't afford to screw that all up."
Emmett and I had met years ago in grad school, and after graduation we ran in similar social and work circles so we always bumped into each other. It took forever for us to admit the attraction to each other. If I hadn't ended up working for him, I don't know if we ever would have admitted it. Being around each other every day kind of forced us to face the obvious. He was just getting started in his career…his political career, and I understood that being openly gay would have done more harm than good, but now things are different. People understand more, are more open, and being an openly gay, upstanding politician would probably do more for his image than he realized. It's just the fact that he now more than ever seemed to keep pushing me and my wants and needs to the side for his career…well, it broke my heart.
"Are you that blind Emmett? That all you care about anymore are the politics? What about us? I can't wait around forever for you to decide when it's the right time. I want a life Emmett. With you, but I won't wait forever. You keep talking about these plans and goals…well what about mine? Do they not matter? You're so close to losing everything that's really important and you don't even realize it. You're going to wake up one day thirty years down the road and realize your mistakes and that all you have left is the fact that you are a lonely, bitter man with no one to share your life with."
"Don't threaten me Jacob. I'm the goddamn governor of Washington. The people of this state have always seen me as a single man. A single, straight man. I love you Jake, with all of my heart I truly do, but I can't just come out by marrying my assistant. I have plans for my future Jacob. I won't give them up!"
We're both shouting at each other by now from opposite ends of the room as we've gotten dressed in the midst of arguing. What Emmett doesn't see are the tears I'm fighting to hold back. In all of our arguing on this subject, he's never been so cruel or honest…it's always been a 'not now,' or an 'I'm not ready.' But now, he's made it clear what's most important to him, and it's obviously not me or our relationship. I guess it was foolish to think seven years with someone would count for something.
"Of course you wouldn't Em. You'd only expect me to sacrifice my plans, my hopes, my goals for the future. A future I thought I would be sharing with you. You know…it's been a year since gay marriage was legalized here in Washington. I had hoped that would have helped you make the choice to be open with people outside of our families. I'm tired of the hiding Emmett. I can't…I won't do it anymore. Marriage aside, I need you to stop keeping me hidden like a dark, dirty secret. You need to decide what you want. Do you want your career, or do you want me by your side as your partner?"
He just stares at me and says nothing for a while. For a moment I wonder if he's in shock, never having expected for me to not give in to his argument. After a few minutes he just looks away from me, a murmured "I'm sorry…I love you Jacob, but…I can't…" all he offers in response.
His answer is like a punch in the gut as I feel my heart shatter into a million pieces. I fight the tears a little longer though, not wanting him to see me weak and vulnerable.
"Well then, I guess you've made your choice clear," I choke out as I walk into the closet and grab a duffle bag. "I'm going to stay at a hotel for a few days until I can find a place of my own. I'll stay on at work until a suitable replacement can be found but…I think it best if we make as clean a break as possible."
I move quickly around the room grabbing things that I'll need for the coming week, although I plan on finding a place of my own before the end of the day tomorrow. I need to just separate myself from this situation and allow myself the chance to heal.
"Jacob…" Emmett cries out as I head toward the front door. He's followed me as I packed, pleading with me to stay. "Please baby, we can work this out. Don't leave me."
Steeling myself for what I'm about to say, I put a neutral mask on my face, and turn to address him.
"No Emmett. This was your choice. You made your decision. I've made mine. I'll see you at work tomorrow."
I shut the door behind me as I walk out and rush to my car, tossing the bag I've packed into the back seat and head to the nearest hotel I can find, wondering how I will ever recover from walking away from the love of my life.
*****EmPOV (three weeks later)*****
I can't believe I let him walk away. I was so sure about everything I wanted. I thought he understood. I thought he wanted the same things, but that night three weeks ago when Jake left…well, it finally made me realize that I had been wrong about so many things. Jacob had been right about everything…without him by my side, none of my goals or plans mattered because he wasn't there to be a part of them.
He wasn't joking when he said he wanted a clean break, the day after he left he had already found an apartment of his own. Two days later I came home to find his house keys on the dining room table and all of his belongings gone as well. I only ever saw him at work, where I'm quite sure everyone knew something had happened. I snapped all the time at everyone over the smallest of things, and Jake kept his distance from me, finally making use of his private office that was adjoined to mine.
He only spoke to me when necessary, and the ache in my heart, the longing to be able to just hold him in my arms again was consuming me whole. He had said he would stay on as my assistant and campaign manager until suitable replacements could be found. I might have had a hand in prolonging the search for them by agreeing to meet with the most incompetent people who applied for the job. I had hoped that the longer I kept him around, the better chance I would have at fixing things between us, or to at least have a chance to sit down with Jake and attempt to talk things over. My plan seemed to be backfiring though because the longer I kept Jacob in his position; the more he seemed to be distancing himself more and more.
I'm brought out of my wallowing by a knock on my office door.
"Sir, I wanted to bring you the final draft of your Christmas Address. You're scheduled to give it on Christmas morning, so please look it over at your earliest convenience and let me know if any further changes need to be made." Jake tells me as he hands me the copy of the speech.
"Jacob please," I plead with him. "You never used to call me Sir, and you've never acted so formal with me…can't we go back to how we used to be?"
I know he understands the underlying meaning in my question by how he looks away from me for a moment before answering.
"I'm sorry Sir. But I think it would be unprofessional of me to speak to my employer in any other manner. In our line of work, I do believe it best to keep things this way, so that our working relationship and expectations are clearly defined and understood by all parties involved… so as not to cause confusion about said expectations…Now if you'll excuse me Sir, I need to see to some other pressing matters to make sure everything is ready for your address."
Without waiting for me to say anything in response, Jake turns and walks out of my office, leaving me grasping at straws to try to figure out how to fix things. I stare at the speech I'm supposed to give as my Christmas Address, a tradition I started my first year in office. It seemed to go over well with my constituents, and I've kept it up every year since. As I glance over the speech, I finally come up with an idea of what to do.
*****JacobPOV (Christmas Morning)*****
Sitting around Emmett's office with his family was the last place I wanted to be this morning. Both of our families were well aware of our parting of the ways, and frankly I was sick of receiving all the apologetic looks of pity. People broke up all the time; Emmett and I were no different. Glancing at my watch, I'm happy to see everything seems to be running right on schedule. Being behind schedule when you're getting ready for a live television address is never something you want to have happen.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Emmett walk in and take his seat at his desk and I can't help but notice how handsome he looks or the fact that he's wearing the red tie I gave him for Christmas last year. He makes eye contact with me, but I look away quickly, only looking at him again once the camera man has given the signal that we've gone live, letting Emmett know he's now on the air.
"Good morning, and Happy Holidays to you all," Emmett begins. I sigh in relief that he sounds calm, cool, and collected, not having let any of the stress of the past few weeks seep into his work.
I begin to tune out his speech, having read and reread about a dozen different versions of it before presenting him with the final draft, until I realize he's gone off script and no longer giving the planned speech.
"Christmas is a time for family, friends, and those who are most important to you. It's a time to share the joy of the season, to let the people who matter most know how much you love them, how much it would kill you to live without them," he continues to say.
Internally I'm flipping out, not knowing what he has planned or what kind of damage control I'm going to have to do since I have no clue what else he's going to say. If it wasn't for the fact that telling the cameraman to cut the feed and leave the public with dead air would cause a controversy in and of itself, I would have done that five minutes ago. All I can do now is sit and watch everything play out and pray for the best.
"I somehow managed to forget the true spirit of Christmas this year," Emmett says into the camera. "I seemed to lose my way a lot lately and forgot what was most important. Someone very dear to me tried to get me to open up my eyes, to see what I was pushing away and giving up, At the time I was too blind to see just how much I was losing, but I've realized now what I've lost, what I would do anything to get back, what I would sacrifice and die for…
It's because of this realization that I need to be open and honest with all of you, the people of the great state of Washington. My name is Emmett Walter McCarty and I am your governor, and as such I need to admit that I have misled you all, by a lie of omission these past three years. I have misled you by allowing you to believe that I am a single man, a straight man.
My name is Emmett Walter McCarty and I am a gay man…a gay man who has been in love with his soul mate, Jacob Louis Black, for the past seven years. I am a man who was foolish enough to allow that love to slip through my fingers because I was afraid, blind, and selfish. I am a man who is hoping beyond hope for my Christmas wish to come true…for the love of my life to still consider me the love of his, to allow me the chance to prove to him how much he truly means to me, and…if he is willing, will allow me the honor of making him my husband."
At this point, I'm sitting there, a blubbering mess and for the first time, unsure of what to do. Thankfully, Emmett's father Carlisle is smart enough to tell the camera operator to cut the feed, sparing me from having to respond to Emmett's declarations on camera in front of the entire state.
Looking around the room, I can tell no one knew about what Emmett was planning as the PR people, the campaign team, and a countless number of political aides are running frantically trying to answer the phones which are ringing.
It's as if time stands still as the enormity of what Emmett has just done sinks in. He's literally just risked his entire career to give me what I've wanted for so long. The pure selflessness of what he's done is enough to make me forget our fight in the first place and pray that he's meant everything he's said…that he loves me, that he wants to spend his life with me.
"So?" Emmett asks me as he approaches me, "Am I too late? Or is there still a chance for us?"
"I never stopped loving you Emmett." I whisper. " It was never a question of my loving you or you loving me. I just couldn't live a lie anymore. I was tired of having to be hidden away. We deserve our chance at happiness just like everyone else."
"So…is that a yes then?" He questions, a hopeful smile crossing his face.
"Of course it's a yes you big lug. I wouldn't want to spend my life with anyone else." I respond, before launching myself into Emmett's open, waiting arms and kissing him.
We finally break apart as camera flashes start going off around us, the press having made their way into the Executive Building and Emmett's office after having seen his address.
"Wanna get out of here?" he asks me as he eyes the private entrance to the office in the back of the room as security tries to wrangle the press out of the room.
"Sure babe…lets go home."
Finally a stealthy diversion created by one of the staff members, Emmett, his family and I manage to make it to the waiting limousine and back to his car. Sitting snuggled next to Emmett, I finally feel at peace again. It's not until halfway back to our house that I let out a groan, followed by a laugh, causing everyone, Emmett especially to look at me questioningly.
"What's wrong Jake?" he asks me nervously.
"Nothing really. It's just, in all of the grandeur of your admission there; did you not realize the media circus I will have to juggle come Monday at work?" I explain between chuckles as I mentally start to list all the potential interview requests that will undoubtedly be pouring in.
"No, I can't say that I did. All that mattered was my getting you back. I can live with just about anything, but you Jake…you I absolutely cannot live without. Besides, bring on the media circus. We'll get through it together."
"Together," I reply as my hand takes hold of his.
"I love you Jacob." He tells me, his eyes conveying just how much truth is behind those words.
"I love you too Em. Merry Christmas Baby."
A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this little slashy holiday piece. I had a blast writing it. Now if you would be so kind, help spread some holiday cheer and click that little review button. Also, be sure to add this to your favorites and alerts if you want to read what's next for these two once I start to post the expansion on this story. Thanks for reading and Happy Holidays!