Author's Note: This is the first attempt at a Yaoi fanfic. I'm in the process of writing one more chapter for this but I'm contemplating whether I should put it here or not because that would mean I'll have to up the rating.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading it as much I did writing it!
It's eight fifteen as I stand in the cold outdoors, watching the white snowflakes fall slowly on the ground. There's a slight amount of snow all over the ground and I can see the footprints I left behind. Leaning against a stone wall that surrounds an all too familiar one story house, I blow my hands, trying to emit some heat on them due to the fact that I forgot my mittens. Hearing the noise of footsteps moments later, I look up and see a black haired, six foot tall teenaged boy standing in front of me. I smile at him as I say hello.
He voice is low and deep as he greets me. "Sorry for making you wait, Kimihiro."
"It's alright," I say to Shizuka Domeki, my best friend. "I wasn't out here for that long."
We begin to walk in the direction of our school, feeling the snow crunch under our shoes. A comfortable silence falls upon us as I begin to try and warm my hands again. I stop with curiosity when a pair of black gloves falls swiftly into my small hands. Clutching onto them, I look beside me and see Shizuka point at the gloves with a grin.
"Make sure you give them back to me later," he says.
Looking down, I can still feel the heat from when Shizuka wore them. "Are you sure?" I ask with a hint of worry. "I don't want you to get cold."
I watch him put his hands in his coat pocket with a sigh. "It pains me more to watch my best friend unsuccessfully try to warm himself."
"Hey!" I playfully slap him on the arm with the gloves. "It's not my fault that I accidentally forgot my mittens at home." He responds by chuckling slightly and it makes me laugh too.
I pull my hands into the slightly huge gloves and they instantaneously warm my cold hands. "Um…" I say, slightly embarrassed. "Thanks, Shizuka."
When we reach the high school, Shizuka and I put our belongings in our lockers before walking together into English class, our first period class. I sit down in my desk, which is located in the back of the room, when I notice someone standing beside me.
A short girl with long, curly pigtails begins to speak to me with a sweet, girly voice. "Good morning, Kimihiro. Did you finish yesterday's homework?"
I greet her with a friendly smile. "Good morning, Himawari. Yes, I finished it after I came home from work. How about you?"
"I wasn't able to do the last page," she says sadly, shaking her head slightly. "I don't really understand it."
I watch her for a moment before deciding to take out my homework from my blue colored binder and hand it to her. "How about you take a look at mine?" I suggest. "Maybe you'll get it after you read it."
I am taken aback when she gives me a quick embrace. Once out of it, she takes the papers in both hands. "Thank you so much, Kimihiro. I'll return it once I'm finished."
I'm about to reply but the sound of the bell ringing startles me. I watch Himawari thank me again before going over to her desk in the front of the room.
I smile at her cheerfulness, oblivious to the eyes that have been watching Himawari and me all through our conversation.
Leaving the antique shop that I work part time at, I walk out into the still snowing cold, dark night. Street lights shining down onto me, I pull my wool hat over my head as I quicken my pace. I make a turn and plop down onto the wooden bench that is located in front of the store. A young man sits beside me and I greet him while noticing him holding two plastics cups.
"Shizuka," I ask, looking down at the items he holds. "What are those?"
"Hot chocolate." He places one of them onto my gloved hands. "I bought one for you."
Feeling the warmth that comes from the plastic, I take off the white lid that covers it. I see a glob of whip cream with a drizzle of chocolate sauce float above the liquid. Bringing the cup to my lips, I take a sip and swallow a mix of hot chocolate and cream. My body is immediately filled with sweetness as I take another sip.
I look up at my friend and produce a tiny smile. "Thanks," I tell him. "This is really good."
He gives me a nod once he finishes taking a long sip. "I thought you would." I watch him about to take another drink but for some reason, he stops halfway. Bringing the cup back onto his lap, he pulls out a tissue from his pocket. "Geez, Kimihiro. You sure are a messy drinker."
I'm about to disagree but his sudden action makes me unable to do so. Gently wiping a small bit of unnoticed cream that was left on the side of my mouth, my cheeks turn faintly pink due to his closeness. Once finished, he crumples the tissue and puts it back in his pocket.
He gives me a questioning look as he takes another sip of his hot liquid. "Are you cold?" he asks. "You're cheeks are turning pink."
I blush even harder, surprised that he can see how crimson my face has turned. "Is-is it that obvious?" I say, slightly self-conscious. I look away, wishing that he didn't have to see me like this.
Standing up, Shizuka looks down at me and says, "Do you want to go now?"
"Huh?" I snap out of my daze, hastily standing beside him. I replace the lid back onto the cup before the two of us start to walk towards my four story apartment building.
My eyes wander around the street, noticing an assortment of stores surround us. Most of them already have Christmas decorations on them and bright, colourful lights make some of them look even prettier.
"So," I say after a moment of silence. "How was archery practice?"
He shrugs his shoulders as he says, "Same as usual. How was work, Kimihiro?"
I sigh, realizing how tired I really am.
Right after school, I've been working for five hours, cleaning and sweeping the dusty old store. Only was I able to get a fifteen minute break three hours later. My manager, Yuko Ichihara, expects the workers to clean up the whole store every time we work and that usually doesn't become a reality due to the fact that there are only two other employees besides me.
I reply to him, saying, "Same as usually, too."
We reach a street corner and I wait for the signal to let us cross. While waiting, I watch Shizuka take his last sip of hot chocolate before tossing it into the garbage can located beside him. I take another drink of mine since there's still at least half a cup left.
Once we cross, we continue to walk while making small talk. As we near my house, I hear Shizuka mumble something to me. Unable to understand, I ask him to repeat it.
A few seconds pass until he says it again, this time a bit louder. "Do you like Himawari?"
"Of course," I say, wondering why he's asking me this. "She's a really nice friend."
For some reason, he sounds relieved as he says, "Okay." I don't bothering asking him why he asked me because after that, he remains silent even after I talk some more.
Standing in front of my apartment building five minutes later, I thank him again for the hot drink.
"No problem," he says, smiling a little. "I'm just glad you like it."
We say our good byes' as I push open the white painted gate. As I take a few steps forward, I hear my name being called from behind. I turn around and look at Shizuka.
Since it's really dark out, I am only able to make out an image of him from the distance. "Yes?" I ask with wonder.
I wait for a really long moment before he shakes his head. "Never mind, Kimihiro. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Uh... okay." Questioning his odd behaviour, I turn back and continue to walk towards my comforting apartment.
As I enter my first period class the next day, I am greeted by a cheery Himawari. After saying hello, she hands me back my homework and I thank her for it.
"Did you understand it after?" I ask. We begin to walk together and I sit down on my desk while she stands beside me.
Nodding her head, I watch her take something out of her pocket and place it on my hand. A pink candy wrapper with a strawberry is what I see.
"This is a thank you gift," she tells me. "Without your homework, I wouldn't have been able to understand."
I smile at the cute packaging before placing it in one of my pants pocket."No problem, Himawari. I'm glad I was able to help you." We continue to chat until my friend spots her other friends come into the room. She thanks me again and goes over to them while I emit a small yawn.
"Kimihiro." A voice from behind makes me jump. Turning around, I smile at a not so happy looking Shizuka.
Before I can even say one word, he surprisingly grabs me by the arm and takes me out of the room. We begin to walk somewhere while I try to match with his growing fast pace.
"Shizuka," I say worryingly. "Where are we going? Class is about to start."
Not replying, I try to stop him from continuing but that only makes him walk even faster. I notice the odd glances we get from other students as we go down the hallway and I unsuccessfully try to stop him again. Sighing in defeat, we go down a pair of stairs until he opens a door that takes us outside.
He slows down a bit as we begin to feel a blast of cold air surround us. Creating snow prints from the fresh snow that fell yesterday, I emit a loud sneeze. Almost running into Shizuka, I notice that he has stopped moving and is now staring at me. His grip on my arm has loosened but I am still unable to shake it off.
My voice is annoyed as I begin to speak to him. "What are you doing, Shizuka? If you want to talk, at least do it inside. It's freezing out here and-"
"I love you."
His unexpected declaration makes me stop complaining and I look at him with wide eyes. Since he said it with a somewhat quiet voice, I speculate whether he said something entirely differently from what I just heard. "Can... can you repeat that?" I say with skepticism. "I don't think I heard you right because it just sounded like you said-"
He shocks me even more by pushing me against the school wall, which is very, very cold but I don't say anything because I'm so stunned of what's unfolding right in front of my eyes. Pinning his hands on the wall between me, I am unable to escape. Face close to mine, he starts to confess even more to me.
"Kimihiro," he says in a low voice. "I'm in love with you. Ever since first year of high school, you're all I think about. You can't even begin to imagine how hard it is for me to watch you talking to other girls while I stand not even five feet away from you. Especially with you and Himawari, it pains me even more because you two are so close."
Seconds begin to tick away as I stare at him with a gaping mouth, slowly processing what he just admitted. Quickly looking away from him, I feel my face swiftly turn hot. "Why... why are telling me all this now?" I mumble shyly. "If you liked me for that long, wouldn't you have told me sooner?"
For an answer, I hear a chuckle come from him. Pulling my chin slowly with one of his strong hands, he forces me to look at him and I see a mischievous grin come from his mouth. "Because I'm not afraid to do this to you anymore."
I'm about to ask him what that is but stop myself when he shows me instead. Closing his eyes, he depresses his lips against mine and I automatically begin to feel my heart beat twice as fast. One of his hands travel onto my bare back, causing me to press against him.
Uncomfortable with his sudden closeness, I choose this moment to push him away. I watch him stumble back a few steps before I rush to the door we came out from.
Holding the silver doorknob, I look back at Shizuka. Right away I am able to tell that he sorry for what he did but I pretend to not notice. I speak loud enough so that he can hear. "You don't have to come pick me up from work anymore."
Entering the building and leaving the cold behind, I don't bother to stay and hear if he says anything. Quickly going back to my classroom with pink cheeks, I get scolded by the teacher for leaving. After listening to the instructor yell for five minutes, I sit back down in my desk.
All through school, I never see Shizuka once.
One week has passed since my first kiss. Every time I think about it, I get flustered and start to think about Shizuka's confession to me. I've begun to avoid him at school because I don't know what to say to him and he hasn't been coming to pick me up from my home and work so I haven't seen him much. But the times I do, I blush like mad and run away, hoping he didn't see me. So you can expect me to be surprised when I see a tall figure sitting at the wooden bench in front of the antique shop holding two plastic cups this evening. When he spots me, he goes over to where I am and hands me one of the cups.
"It's hot chocolate," he says to me softly.
Unable to argue with him because he's being so nice, I sigh and say, "What are doing here, Shizuka?"
He smiles as he speaks kindly. "To walk you home, silly. Is that all right with you, Kimihiro?"
Reluctantly, I give in and say yes only because if I said no, I knew I would feel really bad afterwards. We walk in silence, the only noise coming from when we take sips of the hot liquid.
While we stroll down the chilly street, I steal quick glances at him. I think he caught me doing so a few times but didn't say anything.
When we stand in front of my apartment after what seems like forever in complete quietness, I'm about to say good bye but stop when I hear Shizuka speak.
"Kimihiro," he says sadly. "I'm... I'm going to move to America."
Feeling the drink slip out of my hands, I watch Shizuka bend down and pick up the now empty cup. He places it back in my weak hands, not noticing how close he is standing in front of me.
"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I say once I am able to speak again.
He continues to look at me with sadness while the words I'm sorry come out of his mouth.
My voice begins to waver as I ask him another question. "Then... when are you going?" I ask quietly.
Feeling his hot breath on my face, I hear him say the words that make me goes ballistic. "Tomorrow at ten in the morning."
I throw the cup onto his chest, feeling anger begin to ascend within me. "Why... why would you want to go even if you told me you love me?" I watch his mouth move but I speak over him, my voice beginning to rise. "Are you going to just leave me here and never come back? Shizuka Domeki, I hate you! "
I turn and run away as fast as I possibly can, ignoring the voice I hear behind me. Once I get into my house, the first thing I do is throw myself into my bed and cry, not bothering to take off my jacket. My chest begins to hurt and I start to wonder why I would care so much about him leaving.
"It's... it's because he's my friend," I say quietly in between sobs. As I say it, I notice it doesn't come out right and know that's not the reason why.
Just before I fall into an unexpected slumber minutes later, I slowly say the words that I've thinking about way too much since last week but have been too afraid to admit out loud. "I... I love... Shizuka... Domeki..."
When I slowly open my eyes the following morning, I am quickly blinded by the shining sun. I look away from it and instead read my alarm clock. Nine fifteen. Wide eyed, I scramble out of bed and into the bathroom to brush my teeth.
"Didn't Shizuka say he's leaving at ten?" I ask myself while applying toothpaste to my green toothbrush. "Ahh, I have to hurry!"
I leave my apartment five minutes later and grab a yellow taxi. While in the back seat, I keep pestering the driver to hurry up, telling him I'll pay him double if he gets me there as fast as he can.
When I reach the airport fifteen minutes later, I ask the first person I see, which is a security guard, where the departure gate is. Once I reach it after running, I gasp for air when I place my hands around the medal bar that surrounds it. I scan the area, hoping that I'm not too late. I finally spot Shizuka a few seconds later, who is handing his plane ticket to a lady. He's holding a bag of luggage and has his back towards me.
"Shizuka!" I cry out really loudly, hoping to get his attention. "I think... I think I'm in love with you!"
Suddenly hears mummers all around me, I fell my cheeks heat up with embarrassment, trying my best to pay no attention to them. I keep my eyes on the boy as I watch him tell something to the lady before walking to stand in front of me, the medal bar between us.
His expression's a happy one as he takes one of my gloved hands into his. "Can you say that one more time before I go?"
This time in a low whisper, I look right into his eyes and tell him again. "I... I love you, Shizuka."
Right away I am being engulfed in a kissed from him, watching his eyes slowly close. I also kiss him back, giving him a hug in the process.
Once we let go of each other a few seconds later, I feel my heart beat rapidly from the mouth to mouth contact. "I have to go now," he suddenly says, looking behind and then back to me. "I'll give you a call once I reach America."
"Alright," I unwillingly say. I give him a warm smile and watch him slowly turn around and walk farther and farther away from me. Once he's about ten feet apart, I cry out his name again. He gives me a dubious look when he looks at me again.
"Do you want your gloves back?" I ask, sticking my hands out so that he can see that I'm still wearing them after so long.
Grinning, he says in mischievous voice, "Of course. I'll be coming back to get them when I return two weeks later."
"What?" Soon I am getting angry at him all over again, but it quickly subsides into thinking how clever he secretly is. Chuckle to myself, I continue to watch him go until I can see him no more.
I leave the airport shortly after. Looking up into the sky, I notice for the first time how beautiful the falling snowflakes are.