Let's just get ONE thing clear before we start.

I. Will. NOT. Write a bunch of stupid appreciations or state uselessly that this is not my property.

If it WERE my property, it would not be on FANfiction.

That out of the way, I hope you enjoy.

If you don't like, don't comment.

Something cool

"Could you lend me some mayonnaise?"

That was how Mai greeted Hakase that day, as she sat on the floor playing with her patented Super Glue, sticking her hands in the gooey concoction then in water.

"What do you need it for?" asked Nano, the short haired robot of Hakase's creation, polite as always.

"Something cool" said Mai, as if that were the perfect answer (though it kind of was).

"Something cool?" Responded Hakase.

"Something cool."

"Really cool?"

"Really cool"

"As cool as sharks?"


"Cool! Cool! Cool!" sang the young scientist as she ran off to get the mayo herself.

"So, what do you need the mayonnaise for?" Nano was on the verge of asking before she looked over at Mai and seeing she was blushing furiously.

"This is it," thought Mai to herself, "my previous attempt at telling Yukko how I felt failed miserably, but I have a new approach now."

She really did. Instead of trying a head on approach like last time, she would try a much more subtle attempt, just to avoid being misinterpreted as an uncontrollable and compulsive prankster.

A nice and normal picnic was all she needed.

The day was warm and the weather was fine. Yukko had received the note late that afternoon. The note said absolutely nothing important and was printed on normal paper, the which is not likely to explode. She followed the note's instructions to the letter, the which was unlikely to get you run over by an alpaca, and arrived at the park only 30 minutes after the note established.

Mai was already there, obviously, awaiting Yukko to arrive with a silly and unfunny joke or pun.

And she did.

"Hey there, that's a nice pic-a-nic basket. Just kidding!" in a bad Yogi Bear accent

Mai forced a smile, which hid some of the blush.

"I thought tomato season was over? Just kidding!"

She was on a roll.

But she needed to be strong and take the puns like a man (well, technically a woman, but you get the idea).

"Sit," she ordered-asked.

She sat.

Mai proceeded to taking out a large yellow container (metallic, I like to think, but you can imagine it as Tupperware if you wish). Inside was a strange gooey brown substance, slightly unappealing to mere mortal eyes, but a welcome sight if you know what it is.

Mole (pronounced Mo-le (just think More Lentils)). A Mexican chocolate based paste served with chicken or pork.

She took out two lemons and plates and served herself and Yukko an equal amount of the stuff with a ladle borrowed from the Shinonome family.

Yukko looked at the goo served on her plate with skeptical eyes. She was just about to make a joke when Mai said:


Any normal person would have found it strange for someone to talk only in monosyllable, but Yukko was accustomed to it and you must remember she was fairly nervous and giving it her best.

Yukko obediently grabbed a knife offered to her by Mai, as she served some water and added sugar to give to Yukko, and started cutting the citrus when…

Yellow. Sour. Onion. Green

"GYAAAAAH!" screamed Yukko at the top of her lungs.

Murphy's Law: if you cut a lemon and it squirts, it will fall in, of all the places it could have fallen in, your eye.

Mai closed her eyes in shame and retrieved a small container of eye drops from her purse. Yukko quickly took them to her eyes. Mai, ashamed, squeezed the lemon juice into the Mole and offered it to Yukko.

"It's okay," Yukko thought to herself, "Everyone makes mistakes now and then. Even Mai" and took a bite of the gooey concoction.

And then…

Red. Spicy. Gooey. Wet.


Mai closed her eyes in shame.

How could she not have guessed the Mole would be too spicy for Yukko?

How careless of her.

She offered Yukko a drink of sugar water, which she accepts without further thought.

"It's okay," Yukko thought, "she may have made it too spicy, but she's trying to make up for it, right?". She takes a sip.

And then…

Salty. Wet. Duck. Goose. Why?


Mai looked at the container she was still holding in her hand.

She'd made a mistake.

She'd grabbed the salt, not the sugar.

Mai closed her eyes in shame.

She proceeded to making sandwiches.

Surely a light and simple snack would lighten the mood.

"Why? WHY?" thought Yukko, "Why is she doing this to me? It must be because of the time I broke her statue! No, it must be because of the time I denied having broken her statue! No, it must be because of the time I hid the broken remains of her statue under her bed! No, it must be because of the time she found the broken remains of her statue that I'd hidden under her bed! No, it must be because of the time I tried to rebuild her statue but I couldn't find the head and I gave it back looking like some sort of headless zombie cat thing! Why? WHY?"

She opened her eyes.

Mai was standing in front of her, her hand outstretched, a sandwich in hand.

Yukko stopped crying for a second as she looked up at her.

"Mai," she thought.

She grabbed the sandwich and took it to her mouth. And took a bite.

It was turkey. With lettuce and tomato and little mayo and just a tiny bit of oregano.

Her favorite.

It had perfect taste, perfect aroma, perfect texture.

It was perfect.

She looked back up at Mai, thinking maybe she wasn't trying to fool around always. That, maybe, she was just misunderstood.

Maybe she's just misunderstood.


Tears welling in her eyes, she reached out for another bite.

And then…



Her lips were stuck together, as if glued.

Mai closed her eyes in shame and realized what had happened: Hakase, in her excitement, had grabbed the wrong tube. Instead of giving her mayonnaise, she gave her a tube of Hakase's patented SuperGlue.

Luckily, she knew the solvent.

She offered her some water, but then remembered that it had salt.

She offered her the jar, but Yukko knocked it down in her flailing.

She tried to tell her to lick her lips, but remembered that her mouth would probably be dry because of the salt she'd drunk.


Mai had run out of ideas.

Yukko was freaking out, the picnic was ruined and she would be branded as a hopeless jokester her whole life.

Maybe she should just leave and forget this ever happened.

Yukko would never talk to her again and would DEFINITELY never like her, even if she did.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.

And then…

She grabbed Yukko by the shoulders, to calm her down. Looked into her eyes, to not scare her and then…

She kissed her.

A normal kiss, as if between 2 people that knew each other very well, or that would prefer people not knowing that they know each other very well

Their lips locked for about 3 seconds before either was able to react.

By this time, both girls were blushing madly and Yukko was silently freaking out.

But the deed had been done.

Perfectly, if I may say so myself.

The glue had dissolved.