A/N: Pre-Morgana becoming a smirking evil person. I don't own Merlin.

It was the most interesting time of day, dinner.

Not interesting in the good way, though. Interesting in the 'always something happening' way.

It was mainly Arthur, Uther, and Morgana, but occasionally Merlin and Guinevere were dragged into it.

Tonight's topic of argument was why Morgana had to flirt with every boy she laid her eyes on.

The only thing that had been thrown was an apple, so not as bad as usual. On the worst nights, there would be metal jugs all over the floor. And don't forget the knives and forks.

Arthur was trying to stay out of the argument, but Uther just had to include everyone.

"Don't you think it's an issue?" Uther asked Arthur.

"Uh…what? Yeah…No…I don't know…?" Arthur said, because he really hadn't been paying attention. (Rather, he had been staring at Gwen)

"Pay attention, boy!" Uther yelled, throwing a knife at Arthur. It very nearly missed him, instead hitting the chair behind him, "You'll never be a good king if you can't even pay attention."

Arthur sighed. There it was again.

The 'Good King/Bad King' argument.

Agree with Uther? Good King.

Do anything else? Bad King.

It was rather vicious.

Thankfully, Morgana came to Arthur's rescue.

"Oh, yes, go pick on your son!" she screamed, slightly hysterical (Morgana actually enjoyed arguing, she just got overdramatic sometimes). "Yes, he's not already screwed up enough! Let's make it worse!"

Arthur registered that he should have been insulted, but he was staring at Gwen again.

Uther threw a spoon at Morgana, who ducked under the table.

And then it escalated.

Arthur was yelling that you can't hit a girl, and Morgana started arguing with him because are girls any less than guys?

Uther just went back to the 'Morgana flirts too much' argument. And then, to prove his point, he grabbed Merlin and put a knife to his throat.

Merlin just sighed, and Arthur muttered 'Not again.'

Uther's theory was if Morgana wanted Merlin to live, she was flirting with him.

"That's crazy…" Morgana said, "Of course I don't want to be responsible for his death! No one does! That's a terrible argument!"

Uther threw the knife he was holding to Merlin's throat at her. Merlin took this opportunity to run.

Hours later, Morgana went to her chambers unharmed, Arthur went to his bruised and with general low self esteem, and Uther went to his generally angry.

Just a normal night.

A/N: Please review!