Welcome to my first story! Please don't be harsh, but I accept constructive criticism! I, rainbow-san, will do my best,and please put up with me!

And remember, little children, I own nothing of D. gray man, otherwise I wouldn't be here writing these little things...


The world is dark, but seriously, when is it different? I have lived my life in darkness so I should welcome it, but should I embrace my own existence or strive for something greater? I can't think straight anymore, I'm just rambling on as it is.

I can feel my life dimming as it is and now I can only ponder on my life. Have I lived a good one? I have friends; Kanda, Lavi, and Lenalee.

Lenalee, my one regret, the woman I always loved, but never acted for anything more than a friendship. Her ever bright smile, her beautiful ebony green locks put up in pigtails that cascade down her face. Her round, oval face with startling amethyst eyes. Eyes that hide so many secrets that glitter whenever she smiles.

She was the one I forever wished to be with and see her face.

I laughed harshly at myself. See? As if that was possible anymore. That battle with the akuma horde pierced my eyes and left them without sight. My body itself was mauled by so many cuts and ruptured organs.

The doctors said I would recover in due time, but who were they kidding? I myself could feel my life withering at the seams.

My once bright eyes now have no such light in them anymore.

So soon, death was calling me. Only at 15 was I going to let death find me. My thoughts of the future end now and I can only wish for more time, how selfish of me.

Most likely, everyone at the Order will mourn my death, but they don't even know me for who I am, not even Lenalee. No one has known my true feelings or thoughts. Have I ever thought of being an Exorcist? Do I want to be the martyr everyone needs?

No one has asked that and no one cares. I'm only fifteen and I wanted a different life. A life where I could be a child, where I could live at least to my fullest. And yet I never could have such a luxury.

Now I am all alone, with only myself to comfort me. At this time of night, who would be here though? Even Tim has left to heaven knows where. Lenalee is probably asleep so I can go without regret. I wasn't enough for her anyway. She would be better with Lavi, or even Kanda.

My body is now weakening, now welcoming the prospect of rest, but I'm not going to die in a hospital bed. That is at least beneath me. I will die with only my true companion. One that doesn't question me or chide me. My one true companion, who I can truly be myself all the time.

I strain my body, groaning as muscles are forced to move. I manage to sit up, propping myself up with my numb arms. I pull my legs off the bed and stand up, leaning heavily on the bed.

Slowly, I take a step, then another, and another, clenching my teeth as I trudge on, ignoring the pangs of pain shooting up my body with each step.

I continue on, leaving the room and down the hall, using the walls as a support for my weak body.

With grim determination, I put my foot in front of the other repeatedly as I make my way to my destination, the Ark.

At last I enter my sacred sanctum; the piano room. Being pure white in d├ęcor, with a white couch and a white low table.

I sense the beautiful ivory white grand piano and grin. Panting from the journey, I take the final steps to my companion and sit along its white bench.

Music is my soul companion, and the piano its vertex. This was the one moment when I could relax and take off my godforsaken mask.

Sweating as I am, I still allow myself a smile as I put my hands on the keys for my final time. My fingers, rejoicing of reuniting with their companion quickly gain power and glide up and down the keys, playing one last time the melody my father wrote with me.

With my voice gone, I listen and embrace the tune, no longer caring about anything. The tune ringing loudly through my head and ears brings me to close my eyes as I play.

After what seems like hours, the melody ends and I now bring my head to rest upon the piano, with my arms now limp upon the piano bench. My mind now in peace, and my breaths more deep, I allow myself a broad smile, among none more true to myself. In the now rising sun, I speak two words, containing all I had left, "Thank you."

With those final words spoken, I at last brought myself to say goodbye to the place I called home.


Lenalee woke up and looked around. She felt as if something was wrong. She dressed quickly and left her room, walking aimlessly around the Order, trying to find the source of her distress.

Lavi and Kanda, seeing something different in her behavior, followed as she walked at such a brisk pace.

Finally noticing what was off, she stopped, wondering what and why the entrance to the Ark was ajar.

She entered, with the men following closely on her heels, falling to her knees when she saw the sight that was awaiting her. The men's eyes widened in response to what they saw.

There he was, Allen, perched up upon the piano. His head resting perfectly on the piano tilted towards them.

He had something no one had ever experienced. He had a wondrous and pure smile on his face, whilst Lenalee could only frown in disbelief and tears streaming down her face. Her one and true love lay there, smiling at his own departure to rest.

At peace he may have been, but his friends could only cry. Lavi fell to his knees with tears upon his face. Even Kanda, who turned away with a hand on his face, hiding the horrid tears from view. Lenalee only sobbed louder and the whole Order soon awoke, gathering to the room to see what went wrong, only to be stopped by what was there. All had tears on their faces and mourned his death, yet never realizing that he was happy. He finally could rest in peace, but his friends could give him no such joy.

Allen was truly happy, for he was with his only true companion in the end.

rainbow-san: How was it?

Allen: How could you kill me off like this!

Kanda: Why did you make me cry you bastard?

Lavi: Why do I have such a short part in this?

Lenalee (crying with tissues in hand): It's so emotional!

rainbow-san: Quiet guys! Anyway, please review so I can get better at this!