Disclaimer: I own nothing. These characters belong to the creator of Glee.
Authors Note: Songs are by Kelly Clarkson.
Second Grand Gesture
Emma smiled to herself as she once again meticulously cleaned and rearranged her desk, large brown eyes combing over the surface for any spots she may have missed. She hated when things were out of place or covered with germs. Biting down on her bottom lip she once again straightened out the pamphlets that were set up for the students, they were brand new, personally ordered, and she was more than excited to show them off.
Suddenly, the door to her office was slammed shut and the redhead let out a squeak of surprise accidentally pushing one of the trays that held her pamphlets off of her desk. Quinn moved to help pick them up but the councilor quickly informed her she would do so before kneeling down in order to delicately handle them.
Eyes focused on the mess she mumbled out. "So, what brings you by Quinn, did you um, do what we talked about?"
Quinn moved to take a seat in front of the desk. Chewing on her cheeks, she focused her eyes on anything aside from the woman who was finishing picking up the pamphlets. "Not exactly." She said.
"Um what do you mean not exactly?" Emma wondered aloud as she placed the pamphlets in their tray and re-straightened it on her desk.
A soft blush painted its way across the blonde's high cheekbones and hazel eyes glanced down to fidgeting hands. "I mean, not exactly." 'As in I completely went against the plan and took a slushie for her before breaking down and revealing how I feel… then kicking her out of the bathroom and insulting her so that I would not have to deal with the repercussions... What is wrong with me?'
Emma glanced across the room at the cheerleader with large confused bush baby eyes as she bit down on her bottom lip before flattening out her skirt and taking a seat at her desk. "I uh, I am afraid that I do not know what you mean by that." She muttered softly. "Please do elaborate." Honestly, when Quinn had first come to her with this problem she had thought it was absurd, but now she was starting to find the other girls obvious love to be oddly cute. She did want to help her.
Letting out a sigh she lifted a hand to her aching forehead as she recalled what had happened in the bathroom with Rachel. She did not really know how to explain to the councilor what happened.
Realizing that the young woman was having issues figuring out what to say, Emma decided to start the conversation. Lifting her hands she fidgeted uncomfortably with them as she questioned the other. "Okay, how about you start off by telling me why things didn't uh you know, go as planned? What happened that made you not sing the song to her?"
"Well, I saw Santana headed toward her in the hallway with a slushie and it really irritated me because I told them not to harass her anymore and I acted before thinking and blocked her from getting slushied—" Quinn started, staring down at the floor as she spoke. Not wanting to actually see Emma's reaction to her words.
"—Oh well that is great then!" She praised.
'Yeah… great.' "It wasn't great, it was awful."
"Uh well yes, I suppose it was unpleasant but that had to have done wonders in showing Rachel you actually do um care for her."
"Yeah." Quinn shrugged her shoulders. "I guess."
Sadness covered the councilor's features as she watched the blonde struggle with her feelings, even though she was trying to cover them up Emma could tell that something was truly bothering the young woman. "Then what happened?"
A smile graced her pink lips as she remembered the fight she got into with Santana; it was actually fairly ridiculous now that she thought about it. The Latina had once been her best friend but she could not handle the way that she insulted Rachel. 'I am such a freaking hypocrite…' "Santana and I got into an argument, I tried to walk away." She added quickly when Emma gave her a terrified look. "But, Santana can be relentless and she wouldn't let me leave. Rachel was actually the one to finally get me to put an end to the fight."
"Thank goodness." The councilor breathed out relieved. "How did she manage to do that?"
Quinn chuckled under her breath and shook her head. "It didn't really take much. All she had to do was ask me to stop and tell me that she wasn't worth it." Remembering the way that the beautiful girl had said that caused an unsettling feeling to return, she knew that she was a large portion of the reason behind Rachel's insecurities and it killed her. Letting out a loud groan she threw her hands up in frustration which caused Emma to jump. "God, I can't believe that she doesn't think she is worth it! And Finn, he just stood there watching as his girlfriend was tormented!" Her naturally raspy voice cracked as she practically screamed the words, body heating up and shaking.
Not knowing how to react to the outburst she simply stared, brown eyes wide, taking on the appearance of a deer caught in the headlights.
Letting out another growl the blonde tried to contain her anger and return to the story at hand, it just really bothered her that he could have everything. Popularity and the woman of her dreams and still not treat her right. Finally calm, she continued. "After she told me that, I told her that she was worth it and ran to the bathroom, it was embarrassing."
"But good." After receiving a hazel-eyed glare she quickly explained. "Um I mean uh, it isn't good that you were embarrassed but I bet Rachel appreciated what you uh said about her being worth it." She mumbled uncomfortably. "Then what happened?"
"Rachel followed me to the bathroom and proceeded to ask me about what I had said, which I refused to explain. Then she—" Blushing brightly Quinn glanced down at her hands biting down on her bottom lip uncomfortably.
"She?" Emma pried.
"She helped clean me." Her voice was low, monotone, and bashful.
"Oh." Her eyes widened considerably as her mind entered a place that it did not wish to ever venture. "I see."
"Yeah." The blonde cheerleader coughed uncomfortably as she tried to refocus her train of thought, the memories causing her body to heat up considerably. "After that I told her that she was worth it to me—"
"—that's great!" Emma stated excitedly, a bright smile on her face as she clapped her hands. She was so proud of what Quinn had done, knowing that the young girl had trouble telling Rachel her feelings.
Sighing she once again lifted her hand to her aching forehead trying to relieve the painful throbs. "And then I did what I always do. I called her "man-hands" was a complete hypocrite and told her to leave me alone." She said, her voice shaking with anger. 'I am such a moron… why do I always have to hurt her? I hate seeing her hurting and yet I do it more than anyone.'
"Oh um. Well then I see the dilemma."
"What is wrong with me?" Quinn groaned out placing her head in her hands as she shook it. "I love her so much, so why do I always push her away?"
"Because you are scared." Emma stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, as she thought about it the cheerleader realized that it actually was. It made complete sense that she pushed her away; she just wished that she could drop her walls and stop hurting Rachel. "But on a positive note, I am sure that your words did matter to Rachel. And um taking that slushie for her will probably help make the grand gesture all the more uh successful."
"So, you still think that I should sing to her?" Quinn questioned lifting her head out of her hands and raising an eyebrow at the redhead. She had been wondering if she should still go through with the gesture they had planned.
"Oh most definitely. It couldn't hurt right?"
After thinking it over for a moment she concluded this was true. "Right." She agreed, slowly regaining her confidence.
"So um that's what you should do. Just continue as planned." Her smile spread, she felt accomplished in helping Quinn express her feelings and open up to Rachel.
"Why are you helping me?" She wondered curiously.
"Well um. Because it is my job." When the blonde's smile fell she realized that she had hoped that she was helping for more reasons than that and she quickly added. "That and um despite the past I do believe that you love Rachel and her and Finn do not really seem to match considering what Rachel said at Celibacy Club so—uh yeah. I just want to help."
"Thank you." Quinn said chuckling softly under her breath. "And yeah, they don't match at all."
Rachel was feeling rather uncomfortable as she sat in the front of the choir room, Finn was holding her hand but she did not feel that same connection she had always felt with him. At one point in her life she had longed for nothing more than to feel him next to her and now she could only think about a certain blonde. The diva could feel hazel eyes watching her and the few times she had dared look back she had seen that her assumptions were correct; the cheerleader was definitely watching her closely.
'I really hope that she will understand that the song—' Her thoughts were literally cut off as Will made his way into the choir room.
"Hello you guys! How are you all doing?" They all responded with nonchalant answers, none really caring to answer the familiar question that he asked them on a regular basis. "Okay! Well seeing as we didn't have an assignment I figured that you guys could present any song ideas that you have, I know that a few of you have prepared performances." With that he looked directly at Rachel, she had made certain to call him and inform him that she would be singing today.
"Thank you Mr. Schue and I would love to perform my—"
"—I actually have a song I want to sing." A familiar voice stated from behind the starlet, her head snapped back to meet hazel eyes but the blonde was no longer looking in her direction. Instead she was focused on their instructor. If she were not mistaken she would have said that she was blushing. 'Quinn blushing? Never thought I would see the day, she looks absolutely adorable when she blushes…'
"Really Quinn? We haven't heard many songs from you this semester. Please come down and show us what you have prepared!" He stated with excitement, completely ignoring Rachel's request to sing her song.
"Thank you Mr. Schue." She said moving toward the front of the choir room.
Nodding toward the pianist she waited for the music to start, she had arranged this performance with him beforehand. Glancing toward the students she immediately caught large brown eyes and smiled softly, hoping that Rachel would understand that she was singing the song to her. When a light blush covered her naturally tanned cheeks and she ducked her head to hide her smile Quinn knew that Rachel knew it was for her. This caused her heart to leap, but she did not outwardly show her giddiness.
"There's a place, that I know.
It's not pretty there and few have ever gone.
If I show it to you now,
Will it make you run away,
Or will you stay?
Even if it hurts?
Even if I try to push you out,
Will you return?
And remind me who I really am,
Please remind me who I really am!"
Unbeknownst to her, she was holding her breath as she listened to the blonde sing. Her beautiful deep voice carrying through the choir room. Rachel was proud of how far she had come with her singing, but she was also concentrating on something far more important at the moment. That being the actual words of the song.
As she watched Quinn move around the room she realized that she was focusing on her the entire time, her hazel eyes filling with tears as she sang. Listening to the words Rachel could understand why the cheerleader was feeling so emotional; she was practically bearing her soul for the class to see. For her to see. It was beautiful and tragic and it made Rachel only more certain about the song that she was planning on singing.
"Everybody's got a dark side.
Do you love me?
Can you love mine?
Nobody's a picture perfect,
But we're worth it,
You know we're worth it.
Will you love me?
Even with my dark side.
Like a diamond,
From black dust,
It's hard to know what can become,
If you give up.
So don't give up on me,
Please remind me who I really am!
Don't run away,
Don't run away!
Just promise me you will stay,
Promise me you will stay.
Will you love me? Ohh!"
Tears were now filling the brunette's large brown eyes; she tried to hold them back not wanting to show how emotional she was getting due to the song Quinn was singing. Especially considering that her boyfriend was sitting beside her nodding his head to the beat and looking over at her smiling every few moments. It was heartbreaking. Knowing that she would have to hurt someone.
Rachel thought over all of the times that she had chased the cheerleader and convinced her that she was worth more than she thought, all of the times that she had convinced her to come back to glee, all of the times that she had shown her how much she mattered. It made her question her motives behind doing so. If it had been Santana, or any other member of Glee aside from Finn she probably would not have chased after them. So why did she continue to chase after Quinn in order to show her how special she was? Why was she so special to her? Why had she felt more when kissing the blonde than she had felt making love to her boyfriend?
"Everybody's got a dark side
Do you love me?
Can you love mine?
Nobody's a picture perfect,
But we're worth it,
You know that we're worth it.
Don't run away
Don't run away.
Promise you'll stay."
As the song came to an end Quinn was having difficulty reigning in her feelings and emotions, the floodgates were on the verge of giving and she was certain she would drown herself in tears later. She resented all of the wasted time that she could have spent showing her true feelings to the beautiful woman who was actually crying currently.
'That has to be a good sign right…? She understood the message… that this song was for her…' She hoped that Rachel had understood.
"That was great Quinn, you're vocal range is really improving!"
"Thank you Mr. Schue." She spoke softly, nearly inaudibly as she made her way back to her seat, avoiding eye contact with the diva as she tried to calm her shaking hands and racing heartbeat. She knew now was not the time to speak about what was between the two of them, although it appeared that Finn was confused about his girlfriend's reaction as he asked Rachel what was bothering her.
After the class had settled down and Rachel had calmed her tears and forced on a show-face, Will asked her if she was ready to sing her song.
"I am more than prepared Mr. Schue, I practiced for hours in order to perfect my vocal range in order to present this today." She stated with a bright smile spreading across her face as she made her way to the center of the choir room awaiting the music.
'She is so cute…' Quinn thought to herself as she smiled.
"Okay, good luck!" Will said taking his seat with the kids as they all prepared for Rachel's song.
"What if I told you,
It was all meant to be,
Would you believe me?
Would you agree?
It's almost that feeling,
That we've met before.
So tell me that you don't think I'm crazy,
When I tell you love has come and now.
A moment like this,
Some people wait a lifetime,
For a moment like this.
Some people search forever,
For that one special kiss.
Oh I can't believe it's happening to me,
Some people wait a lifetime,
For a moment like this!
But beauty remains!
Something so tender,
I can't explain!
Well maybe I'm dreaming
But 'till I awake.
Can we make this dream last forever?
And I'll cherish all the love we share!
Could this be the greatest love of all?
I wanna know that you will catch me when I fall!
So let me tell you this,
Some people wait a lifetime
For a moment like this.
Oh like this oh,
I can't believe it's happening to me!
Some people wait a lifetime,
For a moment like this."
'Some people search forever for that one special kiss? Could she be talking about our kiss? And finally finding that connection that she had been lacking with Finn?' Quinn pondered internally as she watched the brunette take her seat beside her boyfriend. Ignoring the way that her chest ached at the sight of him taking her hand she tried to understand the lyrics. 'She was probably just singing the song to Finn that would make—'
Rachel turned her head and smiled up at Quinn in that moment and it cut off her train of thought, hell it completely halted her breathing. 'Or maybe… just maybe…'
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Keep leaving me encouraging reviews like that and I will make sure to update quickly! :)