A/N: Hello, this is my first Kurtofsky fic and I'd love to hear your thoughts/reviews. I had intended to write something smutty as you can tell by the title, but it actually developed a plot, so I'm just going to follow the muse and see where she leads. I'll update as I can and thanks in advance for reading.
"I don't understand why I have to dress up for this." Kurt ignored Finn's petulant tone and slapped at his hands to keep him from messing with his Windsor.
"Because the school said it was a semi-formal occasion and if you embarrass Ava she'll never forgive you." He answered primly, spinning his finger at Finn. "Don't huff at me, Finn Hudson, spin!"
"So, do I pass inspection?"
"I suppose it'll have to do."
"You know if Rachel was so worried about me embarrassing Ava, she should have come down."
"Right, Rachel's going to let an understudy go on opening night for her. Finn, do you even know Rachel at all?
Kurt grimaced when Finn's shoulders dropped. "I'm sorry that didn't come out exactly right?"
Finn gave him a forgiving smile. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I still don't see why she had to drag you into it."
"Well, I'm here for your and Ava's moral support and to quote Rachel, 'Keep you from running into the arms of the first Harpy that smiles at you.'"
Kurt tried not to smile as Finn flexed the muscles in his shoulders and neck. "You know the thing about that is..." He started angrily, trailing off as he tried to get himself under control.
"I'm not sure she picked up on the irony of the statement." Kurt said, hoping to lighten the mood.
He studied his own tie in the mirror as he straightened his collar and pulled a few strands of hair forward to hide his ever growing widow's peak. "God, I'm going to look like dad soon."
"Dad's a handsome guy."
Kurt exhaled, "I know, but I love my hair."
"You could always get implants." Finn said, smiling at him in the mirror.
"Oh, screw you, Finn. Put on those shoes I picked out. I'm going to check on my niece."
Kurt pulled his suit jacket from the corner of the dresser with a flourish. "And, don't think I haven't noticed your socks." He said smiling smugly as Finn flipped his 'thanks' up in the air.
"Remind me to call Rachel and apologize. I feel like I'm holding a platter of steak tartar and surrounded by sharks."
Finn blushed and fidgeted with his coat sleeves for the twentieth time. "Yeah, I'm actually kind of glad you're here. I mean Rachel and I haven't even filed yet, we could still get back together." Finn stopped to nod to a woman, who was slowly walking in front of him, looking over her shoulder in what Kurt supposed was a sultry manner. They both instinctively jerked when she licked her bottom lip at Finn before moving back into normal walking speed as she passed them.
"Finn, I wouldn't get your hopes up."
"I'm not." He sighed, "I just don't see why we couldn't stay together while she...you know...followed her muse or her rainbow or whatever the hell she's doing."
Kurt smiled sadly at his brother. "Do you think you would've been happy waiting at home for her for months on end, the both of you wondering what or who the other person is doing?"
Finn shuffled as the doors to the auditorium opened. "You don't think she's seeing someone already do you?"
"No, I don't think so, but I'm not sure she would tell me if she was."
"Yeah," Finn smiled at him only lifting one side of his mouth. "You're too good of a brother to keep something like that from me."
"I am a wonderful brother, son, uncle, singer, dancer, designer..." He stopped when Finn pushed his shoulder gently as they joined the queue.
There were lines of student's at each door waiting to take tickets and usher people to their seats. The girls looking as miserable as the boys in their semi-formal wear as they smiled their obviously rehearsed smiles. "Oh, this is exciting. I just know Ava's going to blow them away."
"Kurt, she plays the French horn. She said if she does it right we won't even know she's playing."
"Oh, well that will make it difficult to compliment her after won't it? What do I say, 'Great job Ava! I didn't hear you at all?'"
"I think what ever her Uncle Kurt says will make her day."
"May I take your ticket, sir?" The boy or... er young mountain standing next to auditorium's entrance greeted solemnly, as he lifted his open hand. Kurt pulled the tickets out of the interior pocket of Finn's coat, before he could start to panic about not finding them in his pants pockets.
"Thanks...um, I mean. Thank you, Sir. This way please." The usher said as he turned to precede them down the aisle. Kurt hadn't seen the kid's eyes yet even though he had to have an inch or two on him.
"Ah, the joys of middle school." Kurt said leaning into to Finn's ear as they followed the young man.
"Yeah, half of Ava's class looks like they should still be taking afternoon naps and the other half I wouldn't card at a liqueur store." Finn stage-whispered as they came to their seats.
The young man half-bowed as he waved them to their seats. "Thanks, Jake."
The mention of his name managed to bring the kids eyes up from the floor. "Oh, hi, Mr. Hudson."
"Hey, awesome ushering dude." Kurt rolled his eyes as he scooted past Finn to take the inside seat.
"Thanks," The kid said, running up the aisle a few steps before halting, mumbling something to himself and walking at a steady pace to the end of the usher line.
"You know him?"
Kurt watched as Finn did his 'I know something I'm not sure I should tell you, but I kind of want to' fidget, waiting for him to make up his mind.
"He used to be on Ava's soccer team, when they were little. I used to talk to his mom sometimes. She's a real nice lady."
"Oh, that's nice."
Finn smiled at him tight-lipped. It appeared that he had he decided against telling him whatever it was he had been struggling with so Kurt turned his attention to the stage as the orchestra began to take their seats and tune their instruments.
"Lima needs more nights like tonight." He mused looking around the room at all the students and their parents dressed in their finery. Well, fine for Lima anyway.
"Yeah, it was great. And, I don't know what Ava was talking about I totally heard her horn like 3 or 4 times."
"Yeah, I don't think you should mention that to her."
Kurt nodded to the punch bowl. "Want some?"
"You wait for Ava." Kurt nodded as he worked his way through the crowd.
He smiled when he saw there were still huge scoops of unmelted sherbet in the bowl and reached for a cup.
"Sorry," He said automatically when his hand brushed another causing it to pull back abruptly.
Kurt felt a ghost of fear sliver through him and quickly suppressed it.
"Karofsky," He greeted trying for indifference and a quick get-away.
"You came for Ava, I suppose."
He nodded curtly as he filled his cup. "Yeah, Rachel couldn't make it."
"Uh, I heard about her and Hudson. That sucks for Ava."
Kurt turned his face to meet Karofksy's eyes. "Ava's handling everything just fine!"
"Whoa! No need to get..." Karofsky threw his hands up in a parody of surrender and shook his head. "I just meant it hard for kids when their parents split. My son can barely remember me and Chris being together, but it still bothers him."
"Chris? So, you finally came out?" Kurt backed away as Karofsky stepped closer.
"Christine." He said through gritted teeth. "My ex-wife's name."
"Oh." Kurt looked around to see if anyone had heard him. Asshole or not he wasn't about to out anybody. "I'm sorry, but..."
"No, no. It's a natural mistake, I guess." Karofsky stepped back, putting his hands into his pockets and looking around guiltily. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to crowd you like that."
"You really need to work on those personal space issues." Kurt smiled at him blandly, when Karofsky looked at him abashed.
"Yeah," He said, taking a cup off the tower of plastic, waiting for his turn.
"I wouldn't do that, you know. Not then. Not now."
He heard Karofsky snort. "Yeah, right."
Kurt felt his face redden. I'm not a liar Karofsky. I've never told anyone, except Blaine and that was a special circumstance."
"I bet he was." Karofsky had said the words low enough that maybe Kurt wasn't meant to hear them, but he did.
"And what is that supposed to mean?"
"It means I think you told him," Karofsky stepped in close again, but this time Kurt refused to take a step back, "to get in his pants and that you told Hudson for the same reason."
"You..." Kurt felt his nostrils flaring and hated it. Flaring nostrils were not a good look on anybody. "Finn is my brother, you pervert and I never told him."
"Really? Then why does he do this every time I look at him."
Kurt followed Karofsky's eyes as they tried to catch Finn's. It took a moment for Finn to register that he was being stared at, and another moment to see that it was Karofsky doing the staring.
Kurt felt his face scrunch in confusion as Finn's eyes widened and his face went slack for a moment before he turned his head to the left, then down, then looked at everything in the room, before going back to Karofsky and flashing a weak smile at him, then turning to face the wall.
"What the hell?"
"He's been doing that for like 10 years. Would you just tell him to stop? Chris thinks he's some kind of basket case."
"I, uh don't know what that was all about, but it had nothing to do with me telling him anything about you."
"You know what? I don't care if you believe me. I'm not the one whose whole life is a lie."
Karofsky's eyes flashed dangerously. "My life is none of your business." He said through gritted teeth.
"I couldn't agree more." Kurt said puffing out his chest. He would never have a size advantage, but he wasn't going to be kowtowed by the man's physical presence.
Both men deflated and stepped away from each other quickly. "Hey Jake," Karofsky coughed to clear his throat. "How'd it go?"
Kurt watched as Karofsky turned, relaxing as he set a gentle hand on the boy-mountain. It gave Kurt a moment to catch up. He'd never seen Karofsky as the gentle type, but then again he'd never seen Karofsky as a father either.
"Fine." The boy answered sullen. "Can we go now?"
Karofsky looked over his shoulder at him quickly, before bending his head to catch his son's eyes. "You don't want to stay and hang with your buddies?"
Kurt followed Jake's eyes as they traveled to a small group of boys playfully pushing at one another as they came out of the theater. Karofsky was looking at them too, his brow knit together in worry.
"Nah, I wanna go home."
Karofsky ran a hand through the hair hanging in Jake's face forcing it back. Kurt knew the move and the look. He's seen it on his dad's face a hundred times when he was trying to decide if he should push something or let Kurt have his way.
"Sure. Who wants this bird-food anyway? We'll, call in to Breadstix in the car." He said giving Jake a mischievous smile.
The kid actually raised his face a little. "Cool."
What the hell was he doing? "Hello!"
Karofsky exhaled pointedly, "Jake, this is Kurt Hummel. We went to high school together. He's Ava's uncle."
"Oh. Ava's cool."
"Thanks, I'll be sure to let her know you think so."
The boy's face became panic-stricken and Kurt felt his own eyes go wide. "Hummel!"
"No, not like that...I mean, I won't say anything. I swear. I just mean to say that I agree. She is cool, just like me."
The kid looked at Kurt like he's grown a second head. "Well, I used to be anyway."
"Come on, Jake." Karofsky said taking his son's shoulder and turning him toward the door.
Once Jake's back was turned he gave Kurt a very pointed look and Kurt mouthed an "I'm sorry," at him before he shifted his attention to guiding his son through the crowd.
"Why didn't you tell me Jake was Jake Karofsky?"
"Wow and I thought getting divorced meant I'd never have to justify myself to someone on the way home from a school function ever again. Thanks, Kurt you're really helping with the transition."
"Don't be a smart ass."
"Uncle Kurt, that's money in the swear jar."
"Yeah, Uncle Kurt."
"Ava, I'll make sure and settle up before I head back to Fort Wayne. Okay, spill it, Hudson."
"I don't know Kurt. He's just a kid and not his dad and," Kurt made an offended sound as he clutched his chest.
"I would never take out my past aggressions on someone's child, Finn! What kind of a person do you think I am?"
"No! That's not what I meant!"
"You're right dad this is like driving with mom."
"Ava, don't insult your mother."
"Or your Uncle!"
"Jeez, it was just a joke!" Ava said, sliding down in her seat and crossing her arms in front of her, putting her best scowl on.
"Then what did you mean, Finn?" Kurt tried to smile demurely, "I'd like to know."
"It's just Jake a sweet kid and sometimes, uh..."
"Just say it, Finn."
Finn nodded at the steering wheel. "Sometimes, just sometimes, you can be a little abrasive and I didn't want you to say something about his dad to him. Karofsky's still a jerk, but he's grown up some too and I've seen him with his ex and Jake and I just didn't want you to say anything that might upset Jake or make him think less of his dad."
"Oh, well you know being so abrasive it is hard to for me to not be a complete ass all the time."
"But, I think I could manage not to tell some poor kid that his dad used to treat me like garbage."
"He did what to you Uncle Kurt?"
Finn looked at him crossly as his hands tightened on the wheel.
"It was a long time ago Ava. And we were just kids. His dad had a lot of anger and took it out on me. He apologized and I got over it."
"Oh, that's funny or like Karma or something."
"What do you mean baby?"
Finn ducked his head apologetically. "Sorry, Ava."
"Oh, some of the boys are mean to him, but he doesn't fight back or anything, even though Jamie said he could like squish them if he wanted to."
"What? Jamie said it, not me. And, he's not even fat. He said that he just had a growth spurt, I mean he's like 6 feet tall or something." She had worked herself nearly to the front seat in her effort to defend herself.
"Well, the next time it happens Ava it's your responsibility to do something to stop it."
Ava made a long suffering sound as she flung herself back against her seat.
Kurt turned his head to watch the houses pass as Finn gave Ava the same 'stop bullying' speech he'd given him when they were high school. "Some things never change." He muttered to the window as they turned down the street home.