Ranma-chan, the Cat

~Noy Telinú~

Warning: the following is fanfiction. Noy doesn't own the stuff, but, as usual, borrowing it without permission. I said it was a bad idea, but nooooo, Noy doesn't listen to me and writes this anyway. I don't even know what it's going to be about. Wait, what? Really? Oh yes! Oh, I'm loving this now! Hehe. Thanks Noy.

Caution: this involves screwing up the whole story of Canon. If you don't like that, then go away. Shoo.

Thanks!: to tuatara and Kris Leena as usual.

Lesbians: Telinú is a yuri fan. While Noy is trying to reel that in, keep in mind that Telinú cheated. Naughty Telinú. You are a very naughty… person, personality, thing… damn it. Some lesbians may seep through the cracks, so… be careful.

Merry new year!: 2012 starts off with this brand new story! Yay!

You have been warned…


Prologue: the story that changes the story.

16 years and 7 days ago, a child was born to a loving couple. When the mother was almost due, they decided on a name. No matter the gender, the child was to be named Ranma. For some reason, they didn't find out the gender before the birth. Due to circumstances of a 'not telling you until later in the story' way, the couple of Genma and Nodoka Saotome had a daughter. Now, Nodoka didn't care that she had a daughter, but her husband Genma did. Genma wanted an heir to marry off to the Tendos, which he couldn't since Ranma was a girl. That and the Tendo's were all girls. Over the next 2 years, Genma and Nodoka tried to conceive a son, but nothing worked. Due to weird circumstances, or just bad luck, they never were able to conceive a son. Out of desperation, Genma stole tiny Ranma and took her on a training trip to be the best martial artist, and to find a way to make her male. To say that Nodoka was pissed was the understatement of the century.

Every month, Genma would send postcards to Nodoka telling her how he and Ranma were doing on their training trip. It irritated Nodoka to have that happen. She tried to find them, but, alas, Genma was too good at hiding for her. Genma finally found a place, a place to get his son 'back' a place called Jusenkyo.

Now being a Genma in any universe makes you irrational, but if there is a Genma who is trying to turn his daughter into a son in any way possible, well, things get messy.

So here we are, back to the present. One week after Ranma's 16th birthday…

"Here we go Ranma, the valley of Jusenkyo." Genma spoke to his daughter.

"It doesn't look so bad." Ranma replied, shrugging off her pack. "Why are we here again?"

"This place corrects wrongs, and turns you into what you meant to be."

Ranma rolled her eyes. "Whatever you say pops."

Unlike versions of the past, this Ranma was born female, had black hair, had it in a pigtail already (reasons revealed soon enough), and wore breast bindings. All in all, she could pass as a guy very well, a bishonen guy, but male nonetheless. Even if the 'guy' in question was only four foot eleven, or, as the rest of the world uses, one hundred and fifty centimeters tall.

You see, because Genma wanted a son, so he looked for something to turn his daughter into one. Unfortunately for Ranma, this meant being raised as a boy in every sense. Ranma thought that she was a he all the way up until a certain sex-ed class. She realized something was wrong at age 10, and confirmed that she was always a girl at age 13.

Instead of being told that she was always a girl, Genma told her that she was cursed to be a girl right before they left on their training trip. Ranma didn't believe it, especially since all Genma could come up with was a wizard did it. Not that she could do anything, mind you. It didn't help that she had some doubts about being a girl, or even if it might be true that she wasn't supposed to be a she. Nevertheless, she continued to go to all boys' school and make it look like she was agreeing with him until she could find out the truth.

The black haired teen jumped on the pole after her father.

"I'm not going to go easy on you boy!"

"I've got you this time pops!"

The two clashed in the air, doing tricks and maneuvers that most couldn't. Genma got Ranma in a hold and threw her towards a spring. Ranma grabbed onto one of the poles and launched herself back at Genma, kicking him off his pole, causing him to land on another.

"You think that'll work?" Ranma smirked as she kicked the pole under him, causing Genma to launch back into the fight.

That is when the guide came running from his hut, untying himself from a rope.

"Mr. Customers, don't do it! This is very bad!" The guide yelled as he ran, almost tripping over.

"What is he talking about Pop?" Ranma asked, looking over at the guide for a second.

Genma smirked and used that distraction to knock Ranma through the air, heading for the spring of drowned man.

Genma was filled with glee as Ranma sailed through the air. Now his journey will be complete, and he would have an heir worthy to marry a Tendo, then he could live in luxury.

However, while sailing through the air, Ranma grazed a bamboo pole, altering her direction into a different spring, one of drowned cat.


"Oh no! Mr. Customer pushed other into spring!" The guide said as he ran to find Ranma.

'Oh no… NO! Now I'll have to throw my worthless 'why couldn't he be a son' into it again. Oh well, just one more dunk and I'll have a son.' Genma thought as he jumped down off the pole.

Things were going through Ranma's mind; she was changing into something, something furry. It took seven seconds before she broke the surface of the water.

"Ayiah! Customer fall into spring of drowned cat, whoever falls in spring takes body of a cat. Customer taking long time…"

Right when he was saying that, Ranma leaped out of the water and slashed Genma, clothes splitting apart as the man ran.

'Why, out of all of the springs did it have to be a cat?' Genma thought as he ran for his life.

As Genma ran, Ranma chased after him, the red furred cat eventually knocking him into a spring.

'Hmm… why did the customer have red fur? It should be black… ayaih, not again.'

"Mr. Customer fall into spring of drowned Panda. Now whoever fall in spring turn into Panda."

The panda ran as the cat chased him. He quickly grabbed the bags when they came by them as he was chased out of the valley towards a village…


It was the day of the tournament, Shampoo of the village of Women warriors was getting ready to fight when she felt something, something, off. She shook her head. She needed to concentrate. Still, no matter what she did, she couldn't shake the feeling completely that her life was to change very drastically.

{Shampoo? It's about to start. You are needed out there.} Cologne spoke to Shampoo in mandarin Chinese.

{Yes great grandmother, I'm ready.}

{I expect you to win you know} She smirked.

{Of course I'll win, Great Grandmother.} Shampoo replied arrogantly.

Cologne laughed happily as she poggoed off on her staff.

That's when she felt it, felt something that will make her life… interesting.


Ryoga Hibiki scowled as he looked over the cliff; he was so close to Ranma now.

Ever since Ranma left him on the third day, Ryoga has been following 'him'. What made it worse was that Ryoga got those weird feelings each time he saw Ranma. He didn't know what that meant, but it made him want to get revenge even more.

He heard some yelling in the valley below and decided to hurry in order to find Ranma.

Therefore, it was only appropriate for him to go exactly the wrong way from which he needed to go…


Ranma the cat finally got tired enough to sleep halfway between Jusenkyo and the Amazon village. Genma the panda was relived, although was tired too and fell asleep as well.

The guide helped them return to human right as they woke up.

"Naa… where am I? Pops? Huh, what happened to me, why am I wet?" Ranma asked, rubbing her eye.

Ranma's eyes sprung wide open as she looked around, she had a blanket over her and Genma was already dressed while the guide was looking away.

Finding her clothes next to her, she quickly put on a gi.

"Boy, we have to go back." Genma told Ranma, coming over towards her after she put on her clothes.

"Why? That place was boring, and weird… memories…" Ranma muttered.

"Are you alright Miss customer? You turn to cat and freaked out." The guide spoke up, eyes not facing away.

"Wait, what? What happened old man?" Ranma was right on top of him, furious.

"I have no idea what he's talking about." Genma lied.

"Miss Customer forget that she push Customer into Panda spring, no?" The guide was helping… somewhat.

"Huh?" Ranma asked, confused.

"See Miss Customer." The guide threw water onto Genma, who growled. "Spring turn you into what drown in it. He knock you into cat, you knock him into panda, remember no?"

"What? I turn into a cat?" A shiver went down her back. "Why did you take me to a place like that you… you… no… NO!" It made sense to Ranma now, what she has been told her whole life was that she was born a boy but somehow turned into a girl. Now it was clear that it was all a lie. Her father tried to make her a boy for years and now was at a place to do so. She was born as a girl all along.


"Ah yes, Mr. Customer asked where spring of drown man was. Tie me up to no stop. Very foolish Mr. Customer, you doom yourself. Too bad."


"This was all planned?" Ranma asked, not wanting to believe.

"Your guess as good as mine Miss Customer, though I think yes. Look like plan failed, yes?"


"Growlff!" Genma freaked and threw cold water onto Ranma.

Ranma was now a red cat again, irritated, she Jumped at him, only to see that she was a cat, and was overcome.

That only meant more pain for Genma though as the cat attacked him ferociously, more than before, causing him to run off towards the Amazon village.

Ranma didn't give up though, no, the basic mind was going to kill that panda.

Pity anyone who gets in her way.


Fifteen days later… (yes, what happened would be revealed eventually.)

Ranma woke up on the shoulder of a panda, wearing loose silk clothes. Grumbling, she turned to see many, many springs.

"Pop! What are you doing?"

[I'm having a son, whether you like it or not!] A sign read from his hands.

"No you're not! Put me down!"

"Hey, have you seen…" a boy in a yellow and black bandana asked, head in a map.

*splash* before he was knocked into a spring by the Panda.

Ranma didn't notice; she was too busy struggling against the Panda.

"Stop it old man!"

"Mr. Customer come back, yes? Me no help this time. You find spring on your own." The guide sat in his hut, smoking a pipe, talking to himself.

"Put me down! I'm a girl! I was always a girl! You lied to me the whole time!"

Ranma struggled as Genma threw his daughter into a spring, well, that was the plan, she held onto a bamboo pole for dear life.

"Pops!" Her hair turned red, and her eyes went blue, deep blue.

"Greolf?" Genma was confused, what was happening? Why was Ranma looking like her mother even more? Why can't anything go right?

Ranma launched herself at the Panda, furious.

The fighting ensued looked more like a beat down, and that's when something flew out of his fur.

Ranma caught it on reflex, and her eyes went big, her hands shook as she looked at the photo.

"That… that… that's me." Ranma said to herself, mostly in a trance. She turned it around and saw a message.

Genma and Nodoka Saotome with their daughter son, Ranma. (the daughter was crossed out.)

"I was born a girl, and that's mom. WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?"

Genma the Panda stood up, mad as hell.


"You're not going to stop me POP! I'll find Mom! You won't stop me!" Ranma ran off, taking her things with her while being chased by a Panda.


Author's notes: This is another odd story. Noy said that this one was going to start odd, but Ranma being born a girl and not getting a male curse is pretty rare. I think it is crazy though. How often to you see a born as a girl Ranma and doesn't have a boy curse? I know I saw one where he was turned into a boy and another where it went all DBZ out of nowhere, but not like what Noy is planning. Or was it Telinú? Oh, yeah, I forgot… Noy writes what Telinú comes up with and makes it make sense… usually. This was like twice as long… but that's when Telinú got mad at what was happening as story wise, it gave too much, too fast. So… now instead you are kept guessing. Why did Ranma's hair change color? What happened at the Amazon village? Why was it cut? Will these questions be answered? What happened to Shampoo? Ryoga? Uh… to tell the truth… I don't know.