A/N: I'm sorry! It's been a month since I updated.. I'm terrible. But I had some things to deal with. Something happened and I had so much to think about that I just forgot about this story. I'm sorry! I made this chapter extra long to make up for it. Hope you all like it and forgive me!

"Start by telling her who Daniel is" Adam told him.

"Yeah, ok" Eli turned towards me. "Daniel is Julia's brother, and I hadn't heard from him for almost a year, but then yesterday he called me"

"Who's Julia?" I asked.

"My ex" He said simply. I tried to read his facial expression, but it was blank. After a short moment he continued. "He wanted me to testify in court". My eyebrows rose as he spoke.

"What?" I asked. Eli opened his mouth, but closed it again. A small sad smirk appeared on his face. He closed his eyes for a few seconds before he opened them and spoke in a quiet voice "you're gonna think so badly about me"

Clare's POV

I held his hand tighter in mine as I looked at him begging him to continue. When he didn't I decided to speak. "Eli" I said as sweetly as I could. He looked at me before speaking.

"Ok, look, I'm just gonna tell you the short version and then you can ask whatever you want and I'm gonna try and answer. Deal?" I just nodded.

"So Daniel, my ex's brother, called me yesterday" Eli continued "and he wanted me to testify in court. You see Julia died a year ago..". My jaw dropped after hearing those words, but I stayed silent as he continued speaking "She was in some trouble with these guys who sold drugs and one day they gave her the wrong shit and she took way too much and, well, yeah.." His voice trailed off. "She wasn't a druggie or anything. She just took it sometimes. And then it went really wrong. The guy who sold it to her claims she knew exactly what it was, but everyone else is convinced he gave her the wrong bag. She would never go for anything that strong, trust me". He took a deep breath and looked at Adam, for support I guess. Adam nodded as he took a huge bite of his food. Eli looked back to me and said "So he wants me to come and tell them what I know. He wants money. It's disgusting. As if it's gonna bring her back" Eli said as he look down at his hands.

"Then why do it?" I asked. "Let her brother tell them what happened. Why you?"

"Because he's not a credible source. He has never met the guy he's accusing and he wasn't that close to Jules. They didn't even live in the same house. He lived with their mother and she with their father. They saw each other once a week or so, but they didn't really talk." He looked up at me. "And now he wants to take everything to advantage and get money"

"I understand that you think it's a bad idea, but you didn't answer my question. Why you?"

"Because I'm the one who introduced her to them".


"The drug-guys" My eyes widened.

"You deal with drugs?" I asked, not believing it.

"Not anymore!" He said in a defensive voice. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen!" His voice cracked a bit at the end. "I just.. I mean I.. I just tried to.." He closed his mouth and looked pleading at me. "I didn't want this to happen. I thought I was helping her"

"By introducing her to drugs?" I asked shocked. My tone was a bit cold and I could tell Adam noticed. He gave me a glare and I shot it right back. What? I know I should be supportive and all, but this is fucked. Drugs, really?

"I knew this was a bad idea" Eli said, a bit hurt, getting up.

"No wait!" I said. "Sorry. It's just, my uncle did drugs and he was a terrible person. He was really horrible, and I was just a little girl, so I kind of automatically hate people who have anything to do with drugs"

"Oh, great" He said shaking his head. "You hate me. That's just wonderful".

"No, I mean.. just keep talking" I looked at him, trying to give him a reassuring smile. "Why did you think you were helping her?" He looked at me, as if deciding whether to continue or not. After a few seconds he spoke.

"She was feeling really bad, she had trouble at home, and nothing I did seemed to take her mind of it. So I told her there was way she could forget about everything for a little while. I made her promise it was gonna be the only time. And she kept that promise, until her problems at home got worse. She never used it regularly. She only did it like 4 times her whole life. But that was enough" He swallowed.

"You should have known it was a bad idea. Drugs are never a good idea Eli"

"I know that!" He said a bit too loud. People looked at us for a few seconds, before turning back to their food.


"Look, if all you're going to do is tell me how stupid I was and how everything is my fault, save it. I've heard it a million times before and I know it. Ok. So just drop it." He said looking vulnerable.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to. And it wasn't your fault. She bought the last one herself, didn't she?"

"Yeah, so?"

"So you had nothing to do with it"

"Try telling her family that"

"They blame you?"

"Of course they do. Even I do". He stayed silent for a few seconds before turning to Adam. "You were right. There is no way I'm going to be able to talk about it in the same room as them. Daniel is probably going to kill me before I get the chance to talk anyways"

"Isn't he the one who want's you there?" I asked.

"He wants the money. He doesn't give a shit about me. Or her"

"Don't do it Eli. Just tell him he's going to have to deal with it on his own" Adam said.

"I don't know.." Eli mumbled.

"You can think about it. When is it?" I asked.

"In a month"

"Then you have time" I said smiling a bit. "Um, Eli? Can I ask you something?"

"I guess" He answered looking straight into the air, at nothing in particularly. I could tell he was in deep thought.

"How involved where you with drugs?" I asked carefully. He stopped staring into the air and turned towards me. He looked at me with big eyes.

"What?" He asked slowly.

"I just need to know. Did you do drugs? Or did you sell them? What were you doing?"

"Why do you need to know that? I already told you I don't have anything to do with it anymore" He looked a bit sad.

"Eli, I just-" He interrupted me.

"You don't trust me" He said simply.

"It's not that. I just want to know"

"It shouldn't matter!" He said. "It's what I am now that matters, isn't it?"

"The past will always be a part of you Eli" He just looked at me.

"I'm sorry"


"I'm sorry I can't change may past. I wish I could, trust me" He said, his eye's shining.

"Just tell me."

"Seriously Clare? I just told you about me dead girlfriend, and instead of comforting me or saying anything you're pushing me to tell more? Apparently telling you I basically killed someone isn't enough for you to trust me?"

"I'm sorry Eli, but did you hear that sentence? You said 'telling you I basically killed someone isn't enough for you to trust me'. Do you find it hard to believe it's hard to trust someone who kind off killed his girlfriend?" I raised my voice. I didn't mean to, but I was scared. This wasn't normal. I knew Eli was a 'bad-boy', but I never thought he was dangerous.

"You're scared I'm going to kill you?" He asked quietly, his voice cracking. I just looked away, and he laughed a short laugh. "What's so funny?" I asked. He just shook his head.

"This is crazy Clare"

"What is?"

"I would never hurt you" He said his voice trembling.


"What?" He asked, his voice barely hearable.

"Look, Eli" I said my hand touching his cheek "I'm sure you didn't mean to hurt her ether" He let out a breath, looking scared.

"But I-"

"I know, Eli. It's not your fault, but if you're involved with people like that, it's going to affect everyone in your life"

"I'm.. I'm not" His voice was really unstable now.

"Eli, I need some time to think. Ok?" I said sweetly, but I'm sure my fear showed.

"Please don't do this" He whispered, swallowing hard.

"I'll see you around" I said getting up. I walked away. When I got to the doors I turned around, looking at Eli. He had his back towards me. He hadn't moved. He just sat there.

Adam's POV

"Eli?" I said slowly.

"My life sucks" He stated simply.

"No it doesn't" He gave me a 'are-you-kidding-me'-look.

"She's going to come around. It's just a lot to take in."

"She's not"

"Why do you say that?"

"Did you see her eyes? She was freaking scared of me! Like she was scared I was going to poison her if she came too close"

"You're exaggerating"

"No I'm not" He said letting his head fall on the table. "See I was right when I told you I should never get too close to a girl ever again. I told you. I knew I was going to end up feeling like shit. I always do. I should just have stuck to my plan. It worked so well" He said his head still on the table, his face pointing downwards.

"Playing every girl in this school is not the way Eli"

"It felt right. I didn't feel like crap after"

"You should have. Remember how you felt after Clare played you? That's how every other girl feels after being with you"

"I know"

"Don't go back to that. It might feel easier now, but trust me, when your old and alone all those girls won't mean a thing. You're going to wish you had a girl by your side"

"They don't mean anything. That's the point" He lifted his head and looked at me. "And I'd rather sit there alone and old not feeling a thing, than sitting there hurting thinking about how no one wants me"



"Give her some time" He gave me a glare. "A week, Eli"

"You're crazy if you actually believe she's coming back"

"One week"

"Fine, but after that I'm doing whatever I want" He said darkly. I could tell he was hurting.

"Whatever you want"

A/N: Hope you liked it! REVIEW and tell me what you think! :) So, I'm thinking of ways I can get better at updating. I'm going to set a due time (for me). I'm going to update when I get 15 new reviews. That means, when I have 278 reviews, I will update. Promise :)