Title: Five Pillow Talks
Author: Shenandoah Risu
Rating
: Teen
Content Flags: suggestive dialogue
Spoilers: through SGU Season 2 "Epilogue"
Characters: two pillows/ TJ/ Young, Matt/ Chloe, Destiny/ Seed Ship, Telford/ Ursini #1, Greer/ Lisa
Word Count: 950
Summary: "Well, a pillow would be nice, for starters."
Author's Notes: Written for a challenge at the LJ Comm sg1_five_things. And yes, that's real machine code in #3, and I have no idea what it actually does. So if your garage door suddenly goes up while you read this, at least you know why.
Disclaimer: I don't own SGU. I wouldn't know what to do with it. Now, Young... Young I'd know what to do with. ;-)
Thanks for reading! Feedback = Love. ;-)

oOo

Five Pillow Talks

"Hey, P-1?"

"Whassup?"

"Good to see you again, after, what, a million years?"

"Lookin' good, P-2."

"You too."

"One would think we'd deteriorate a bit, despite the shrink wrap…"

"… but we look gooooood, like the day we were made."

"P-2, what's that?"

"Some guy. Some girl."

"Not Alterra?"

"No."

"How can you tell?"

"He's bleedin' on me. Yecch."

"Ick, that's a lot – I got it on me, too… Nope, definitely not Alterra."

"Well then… Who are they?"

"Beats me, P-2."

"She's pretty."

"Yeah. Oh. She's crying."

"Hmmm… Lovers, P-1?"

"Former lovers, I'd say."

"Yeah… DNA traces of both, here."

"Might be a good story, P-2."

"Shhh… he's coming to. Let's listen and find out."

oOo

"You know what I miss the most?"

"What's that, Chloe?"

"My pillow."

"What?"

"Why is that so surprising?"

"Well, I would have thought – your mom, or your friends, or chocolate…"

"Yeah, I miss those, too. But right now I miss my pillow."

"What's so special about it?"

"Oh, I don't even know… not too soft, not too hard, just the right degree of lumpiness…"

"Lumpiness?"

"Yeah… so you can puff it up."

"Hmmm… actually, these pillows are pretty comfy, I think."

"Ugh – that ergonomically correct crap that molds itself to your head. Plus they weigh a ton. And for god's sake – metallic fabric!"

"What does your pillow look like?"

"Don't laugh… it's a Disney princess pillow…"

"For real?"

"I said, don't laugh!"

"Ouch! Ow! Stop it! Hey! No pillow fights with these things!"

oOo

dim vv as double
dim sMC as string = MC_Eval$ "
~docking maneuver successfully completed~
b8 #vv ' ' vv base address
dd 40 08 ' fld qword [eax+08] ' angle degrees in vv2
~oooh your clamps are nice and tight~
c7 00 NL180 ' mov dword [eax],180 ' temp store vv0 integer 180
da 30 ' fidiv dword [eax] ' angle in degrees
~initiating data transfer~
d9 eb ' fldpi ' pi
de c9 ' fmulp st(1) ' multiply by pi
~whoa that is a lot of data~
d9 fb ' fsincos ' produce sine st(0) and cosine st(1)
dd 50 38 ' fst qword ptr [eax+56] ' sin in vv8
~just relax and open the return path~
d9 c9 ' fxch st(1) ' swap to save cos
dd 50 30 ' fst qword ptr [eax+48] ' cos in vv7
~return path opened~
d9 c9 ' fxch st(1) ' swap back again
d9 f3 ' fpatan ' arctangent pops 1 then result in st(0)
~oh wow your conduit is amazing~
dd 50 28 ' fst qword ptr [eax+40] ' store arctan radians in vv6
d9 eb ' fldpi ' load pi
~beautiful beautiful beautiful~
de f9 ' fdivp st(1) ' divide angle by pi
da 08 ' fimul dword ptr [eax] ' multiply by 180
~need more data~
dd 58 20 ' fstp qword ptr [eax+32] 'store angle degrees in vv5
c3 ' ret 'dim vv as double
~second data stream initiated~
dim sMC as string = MC_Eval$ "
b8 #vv ' vv base address
~oh oh oh~
dd 40 00 ' fld qword ptr [eax+00] ' ( vv1
dc 40 08 ' fadd qword ptr [eax+08] ' + vv2
~you are amazing~
dd 40 10 ' fld qword ptr [eax+16] ' ) ( vv3
dc 40 18 ' fadd qword ptr [eax+24] ' +vv4
~so are you~
'de c9 ' fmulp st(1) '
de f9 ' fdivp st(1) ' ) /
~we fit so well together~
dd 58 38 ' fstp qword ptr [eax+56] ' = vv8
c3 ' ret '
~we should stay docked~
dim fun as long ' function number
dim sMC as string = MC_Eval$ "
~we both have a mission to fulfill~
5a ' pop ' obj elements pointer
42 ' inc edx ' adjust pointer to the start of data elements
*sigh*/ *sigh*
8b 05 #fun ' mov eax,fun ' get function number
c1 e0 03 ' shl eax,3 ' *8 step
~thank you for your company~
83 c0 05 ' add eax,5 ' add 5 to reach jump table
e8 00 00 00 00 ' call null ' where am I ? identify absolute address
~be well Destiny~
59 ' pop ecx ' pop my address here intp ecx
03 c1 ' add eax,ecx ' add to jump offset to get abs address
~be well Seed Ship~
ff e0 ' jmp eax ' indirect jump to jump table
end of line

oOo

"You're shittin' me, right?"

^chirp chirp^

"No way I'm getting back into this thing."

^chirp^

"Because I'm a guy and I'm too tall for this wee little pod!"

^chirp chirp chirp^

"Okay, okay, you're great in the sack, I'll hand you that, but I still have a stiff neck from yesterday."

^tic tic tic^

"Not funny, dude."

^chirp^

"Well, a pillow would be nice, for starters."

^e-e-e-e-e-e^

"Square fluffy thing, about yae big, really comfy."

^chirp^

"All right. I'll go find one. You go look for a better place, okay?"

^chirrrrrrp^

"Fine. See ya. Tell the others no peeking. They'll get their turn eventually."

oOo

"… and fifteen grandchildren!"

"I'm tired."

"Aww, Ronnie…"

"Aww, Lisa…"

"D'you remember when we made our first one? You bumped your head so badly TJ had to stitch you back up in the middle of the night."

"We had no pillows…"

"We had nothing, back then."

"We had each other."

"And that was enough, somehow."

"It was, it was… Now look at the beautiful pillows we have."

"No more bumping your head…"

"Oh, I still bump my head plenty!"

"Yeah… but you don't need stitches afterwards."

"True, true…"

"Anyway, we got these pillows for our 30th anniversary."

"They're gorgeous. So soft and comfy."

"Perfect for us."

"Perfect. Like us."

oOo

oOo

A comment or feedback would be very much appreciated!