I don't own Twilight. all Stephanie Meyer.
Flyway With Me
Frame after frame, picture after picture, the monotony of having our wedding photos taken was a welcomed distraction. The steady feel of Edward's hand at the small of my back, around my waist, twined with my fingers, kept me grounded. We posed, smiled, and kissed with each flash of the camera.
At one point, with his forehead pressed against mine and our eyes closed, Edward whispered, "Are you all right?"
I waited a moment before answering, in hopes that my voice wouldn't tremble. "Yeah."
He kissed me tenderly before he adjusted our position at the directive of the photographer. "I saw your reaction to the man Vanessa was with. Who was he?" His voice was low, smooth.
The man who broke my heart.
Edward sighed. "Never mind. I already know. Jacob Black, am I right?" When I didn't respond he simply tightened his hold on me a little more firmly. "Bella, if you need to speak with him, then by all means do so. But keep in mind that you are my wife now. I don't share."
I shivered at the possessiveness in his tone, surprised that I kind of liked it.
Once the photographer indicated that he was done, Edward held his arm out for me and led me across the yard to where the tent had been set up. Music and laughter filled the space as the reception continued in full swing. As we came in through the back entrance, the bell like trill of Alice's voice sounded through the space.
"…and now it's my pleasure to present for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen."
My cheeks flamed at all the applause and cheers, but the warmth of Edward's hand was reassurance enough that I could get through it. Our table was in the middle of the dining area with his parents, Charlie, and the wedding party.
We joined the table and a few minutes later the wait staff came out to begin serving everyone. The meal was three courses, not including the wedding cake and other desserts, plus wine, champagne, and cider. When it was time to cut the cake, I started getting nervous again. But all Edward had to do was smile at me, and I was put at ease. The sensual kiss he gave me when a bit of icing had ended up on my lower lip during my turn left me completely befuddled.
Our first dance was the first chance I had to relax. Edward held me close against his body, my arm around his neck and my other hand held firmly in his against his chest. I nearly squealed when I saw that instead of the string quartet playing the song, it was the actual singer performing it who'd written it.
If Edward didn't want me to fall in love with him, he had to stop doing such sweet things.
As we danced, guests came to offer their congratulations and eventually wanted to dance with each of us. We spoke to them politely, Edward offering what comfort to me that he could. I breathed a sigh of relief when it was time for the father-daughter dance, though Charlie and I couldn't dance whatsoever. He eventually passed me along to Carlisle, who had me blushing more than I had before. When I finally made it back to Edward's arms, I buried my face in his neck and just wanted block out the rest of the world.
That was until I heard a familiar voice behind me. Edward stopped our movements and I turned to find Jacob and Vanessa standing nervously behind us, with just enough distance between them to indicate strain.
Before Jacob could say anything, Vanessa reached for my hand and pulled me off to the side. Her eyes were filled with unshed tears and she fidgeted with her hands anxiously. "Oh, Bella, I am so sorry. You have to know that I had no idea. Jake told me he'd split with his girlfriend, but he never mentioned her name or the fact that she was pregnant. I swear… I had no idea."
I took her hands in mine to stop her fidgeting. "Vanessa, it's okay."
She stopped her rambling and finally met my eyes. "How?"
"Jacob did hurt me, and it's something that I'm still working through. But if he hadn't, I probably wouldn't have met Edward, and he's been so good to me," I said with a small smile, realizing how true my words were. "Or you. When he first told me about 'Nessie', I wanted so much to hate you. After getting to know you, though, there's no way I couldn't love you."
An expression of outrage flittered across Vanessa's face. "I don't think I can stay with him after what he's done."
I squeezed her hand. "No. Please don't break up with him because of this. I couldn't stand it if I was the reason you guys didn't work out." I couldn't believe what I was saying. Wasn't that what I'd wanted from the moment he'd told me he'd found someone else?
"Bella, how can you be so calm about this? So kind?" She looked at me with wonder.
My eyes darted to Edward. He looked as he always did, calm and collected, but I could see the anger hidden beneath the surface. The tenseness of his jaw, the flexing of his muscles under his tux. Knowing that he was on my side gave me strength. "I don't know. Maybe it hasn't really hit me yet. All I know is that, I want us to be happy. If that's Jake for you, then find a way to forgive him and work through it." I could feel the burn in my stomach as I spoke, but deep down I knew that it was the right thing to do.
Vanessa sighed and hugged me tightly. "You truly are an amazing person, Bella."
I wasn't sure how true that was, but I nodded and then we made our way back over to Edward and Jacob. Automatically, I tucked myself into Edward's side, his arm held out for me at just the right moment.
"Bells?" Jacob's voice was raw, uneasy. "Can we, uh… Would you dance? With me?"
My heart pounded in my chest at his question.
Edward, sensing I needed help, pressed a kiss to my temple. His lips were soft and warm and I could feel the tip of his tongue on my skin. "I'll wait here for you, sweetheart. If you'd like to," he said, huskily.
I bit my lip and glanced over to Vanessa. She wiped the tears from under her eyes and gave me a brief nod. "Okay." I reluctantly pulled away from Edward's embrace and followed Jacob to the edge of the dance floor.
Jacob and I danced awkwardly back and forth, his hands resting on either side of my hips and mine right on top of his shoulders. I looked everywhere but in his eyes and waited for him to finally break the silence.
When he cleared his throat, I still continued to look away from him. "I tried to call you."
"I know. I wasn't ready to talk." I kept my voice low.
"Bells, you are having my baby." He sounded earnest. His grip tightened on me.
My jaw clenched and I finally met his gaze. "Yes. And you left me for another woman as soon as I told you that I was pregnant."
He lowered his head in shame. "I wasn't… When you told me that I was going to be a father, I panicked. I wasn't ready."
"Jake, you still aren't," I whispered. It took everything I had to keep from falling apart. To say the words that I needed to. "You shattered me when you left and I've been trying to pick up the pieces ever since. And, now, I think you are finally realizing what you lost. You're trying desperately to have the best of both worlds, but you can't."
He seemed to deflate at my words. The pain in his eyes when he looked back down at me nearly broke me. "Will you ever be able to forgive me?" he asked.
"I'm working on it." I stepped out of his hold, stopping our swaying. "But you should try to forgive yourself." With my head held I, walked away from Jacob Black. It was the most difficult thing I'd ever done in my life.
I burrowed further into the pillow I was resting on. "Mmm."
"Sweetheart, it's time to wake up. We're here." Edward chuckled.
"Where is here exactly?" I asked, sleepily. Rubbing my eyes, I yawned and realized that my head was on Edward's lap. I blushed and sat up quickly.
He shook his head in amusement and rose to his feet. "Right now we are in Madrid. I figured that we could spend a couple of days here, then a couple of days in Marseille, and then our last few days in Naples." He held his hand out to me and pulled me to my feet.
"You… You remembered?" I asked, my mouth open slightly in surprise. I'd offhandedly mentioned to him before the arrangement had even been broached that I'd love to travel through Europe on my honeymoon. He'd even remembered the different cities I'd mentioned.
Edward brought his hands to my hips and pulled me up against his body. "Bella, I've been incredibly selfish with what I've asked you to do for me. The least I can do is give you the honeymoon you've dreamt about." There was a heat in his eyes, sensual and dangerous, that I hadn't seen from him before.
I bit my lip and ducked my head shyly.
"Come on. Let's go." He squeezed my hips and winked at me playful.
I wanted to giggle, but held back.
We left Edward's private plane and were met on the tarmac by a man in a black suit and matching sunglasses. He shook Edward's hand and nodded briefly to me. Further down the runway our limo was waiting and Edward guided me there with the slightest pressure of his hand on my lower back.
He had booked us a suite at the Hotel Ritz and I could hardly believe my eyes. Just as the scenery had blown me away during the drive, the beauty of the hotel and our room had me in awe. I could hardly believe the expense that he'd gone to for me. Edward dealt with the bellhop as I took in the rest of the suite.
There was a spacious living room that had a door that led to a balcony, two bedrooms, and two bathrooms. It was all elegantly decorated and beautiful.
When I entered the living room again I found Edward tipping the bellhop and closing the door behind him. He ran a hand through his hair and turned toward the room. He looked tired, but somehow like he was ready to join a photo shoot for GQ.
"Our breakfast should be here soon. I called for it when we arrived," he said.
"Perfect." I yawned and lifted my arms over my head to stretch.
Edward cleared his throat and moved further into the room. He tossed his suit jacket over the back of one of the chairs and scrubbed his face for a moment as he fell back on the couch.
I wasn't sure what to say to him. It was amazing how in front of other people we could be affectionate and completely at ease with another, but get us alone and things became awkward. Taking a moment to gather some courage, I walked over to Edward and sat down on his lap.
His arms wrapped around me automatically, a surprised smile on his face.
I rested my hand against his face and lightly stroked his cheek as Edward watched me cautiously. The contrast between his smooth skin and the shadow of beard growth made me smile. Our gazes locked and heat coursed through my body, tingles dancing across my collarbones.
Edward leaned forward slightly and kissed me, taking my bottom lip between his. He nibbled and sucked on my lip, tightening his hold on me. I whimpered as deepened the kiss. One of his hands slid up my back and twined in my hair, holding me in place while his lips and tongue stroked and danced with mine.
We parted reluctantly, our heavy breaths mingling together as we tried to calm down. After a moment and another knock from the man outside our room, Edward sighed and kissed my temple before he lifted me from his lap and set me down on the couch. He ran his hands through his hair a couple of times before answering the door.
A young man came in with a full dining cart and brought it into the living room. He left and returned a moment later with another full cart. He nodded his head to me and shook his hands with Edward. When he saw the tip that had been passed to him he proceeded to thank Edward profusely until finally closing the door.
I walked over to one of the carts and looked to Edward, my eyebrows raised. "There's no way you can expect us to east all of this. There's way too much food here." To me it looked like enough to feed a small army with pancakes, waffles, crepes, French toast, eggs, and so much more.
"Whatever we don't get to, but want to try, we can save for later or tomorrow," he said.
I shrugged and picked out a couple of crepes with strawberries and eggs and brought them over to the dining table. Then I found a coffee pot and poured myself a cup. I settled myself down at the table and waited for Edward.
He joined me not too much later with a bit more food on his plate and coffee. We ate silently for a few minutes, our eyes meeting every so often across the table. It amazed me how Edward always seemed completely in control of himself. Even after our heated moment before breakfast came, he didn't seem the slightest bit affected.
Biting my lip, I decided to test my theory. After cutting a piece of my second crepe, I brought it up to my mouth and slowly rubbed my foot against Edward's leg. He tensed slightly, but otherwise showed no sign that I'd touched him. I finished the bite of crepe and bit into a piece of strawberry, sliding my foot further up his leg. He merely cleared his throat and sipped his coffee. When my foot finally reached his thigh, Edward brought his free hand down to stop my movements.
He held my foot in his hand, rubbing his thumb against my arch. "Isabella, I know exactly what you're doing." His eyes danced with amusement and… desire. "There's nothing I want more than to strip you out of those clothes and make you forget your own name, but there will be time for that later. Right now, I want to give you the trip you imagined."
My body heated at his words, embarrassed and pleased at the same time.
With one last squeeze, Edward released my foot and continued with his breakfast.
After we finished I went to the main bedroom to shower and change my clothes. Then while Edward was in the shower I looked over the food we didn't eat and set some of it in the refrigerator for later. I went back to the bedroom to look for a comfortable pair of shoes when the door to the bathroom opened.
Out came Edward with only a towel wrapped around him, slung low on his hips. His hair was wet and pulled back, out of his eyes. Water droplets slid down his chest and stomach. His hard, perfectly ripped stomach.
I had frozen mid-step upon seeing him and managed a squeak before I covered my eyes and turned around. There was no doubt that my face was redder than a tomato. I tried to say something, but was completely flustered.
"Bella." Edward chuckled behind me.
I couldn't face him. Sure we were married and our arrangement had clear specifications on intimacy, but that didn't mean I was ready right then. I had teased Edward during breakfast, but that was just to see if he would actually respond. I didn't… I hadn't actually…
Even my thoughts had become incoherent.
"Bella, sweetheart." Edward stood behind me, the scent and heat of his skin from his shower surrounding me, making me dizzy. "Turn around."
I shook my head. "I can't."
He rubbed my arms soothingly for a few seconds before he gently gripped them and turned me so that I was facing him. I kept my eyes tightly closed. "Open your eyes, Isabella," he whispered.
Taking a deep breath and lifting my chin, I opened my eyes slowly. A sea of deep green was all I could see and I was dizzy for a completely different reason.
"Bella, you don't have to hide from me." His dulcet tone made my knees quiver.
"Edward," I whispered.
He pressed his forehead to mine, eyes closed tightly as though he was in pain. "Isabella, I'm trying to be a gentleman, but you looking at me that way isn't making it any easier." He gripped the fabric of my top, holding me pressed against his damp body. And he smelled amazing. "We can do this."
I tried to nod, but wasn't really sure if I managed to do so.
Without any words, we somehow managed to move seamlessly with one another. He put on a pair of briefs and then proceeded to dress. I slipped on my comfortable boots and then stood and helped Edward with his shirt. I took the tie he held in his hand and tossed it on the bed. He glanced at where the tie had landed and back at me, one eyebrow arched.
Shrugging, I adjusted the collar of his shirt. "It's a bit much to go out exploring the city," I explained.
He nodded in concession. "Are you ready?"
"Almost." I went over to my other suitcase and pulled a hat on and then got my coat and scarf out. Edward was right there to help me into it. "Thank you."
Touring Madrid with Edward was incredible. He hired a car company to drive us around and booked a few private tours for us. After each activity he insisted that I rest. We had a long, leisurely lunch and continued with our sightseeing.
It was… wonderful.
A dream come true.
When we finally made it back to the hotel for dinner, I soaked in a bubble bath and took my time getting ready. Alice had made sure to pack all of my outfits for me, separating them into groups so I would know what went together. One whole suitcase had just clothes, another had shoes and other accessories.
The dress I chose for that evening was a royal blue with an empire waist and beading along the bodice. It was flattering and didn't really look like a maternity dress. I fixed my hair so that it fell down my back in big curls and then put on a little makeup.
As I finished up, Edward came into the bathroom behind me. The tie that he held in his hand was the same color as my dress. I watched as he quickly knotted it and tightened it into place, admiring how handsome he looked. Our eyes met in the mirror as he straightened his collar and he winked at me.
My cheeks flamed in pleasure and I tried to hide it by putting some lip gloss on. As I blotted my lips to make sure the gloss spread, Edward wrapped his arm around my waist, his hand resting on my baby bump, and pressed a kiss to my neck.
"You look lovely," he said, low and throaty.
I shivered and he chuckled. "Thank you," I whispered. "You look handsome."
His slips pressed just below my ear. "Are you ready?"
Edward pressed one more kiss against my skin and led me out. We made our way down to the hotel's restaurant and we were brought to a table right away. He pulled my chair out for me and made sure that I was settled before taking his seat.
The maître d' handed us our menus and left.
Once our waiter stopped by and we placed our orders and received our drinks, Edward reached for my hand under the table. He rested it on his lap, gently running his fingers along the sensitive skin on the inside of my wrist. "What was your favorite part of today?"
I struggled to form a coherent thought as his fingers continued to stroke my wrist. "The way the old world and new mixed so seamlessly together," I said, breathing deeply. "The cobblestone streets and large archways. The stores and restaurants. Museums. It was all so beautiful."
Edward smiled, the expression in his eyes tender.
"What about you?" I asked.
"You," he said matter-of-factly. At my obvious confusion, he chuckled. "I loved watching you enjoy yourself. Seeing the sights for the first time and really taking it all in. You were beautiful and so happy. It made me remember why I like to travel."
I felt my cheeks heat and I ducked my head shyly. "This was only our first day and I can hardly believe it. Thank you."
He ceased running his fingers along my skin and brought my hand up to his lips. "The pleasure is all mine, Isabella," he whispered and pressed a kiss to my knuckles. "I've been fortunate enough to be able to travel with my family, for work, and at the request of clients, but it's rather nice to be able to share this experience with you."
I placed my hand back in my lap when he released it. "Alice and I used to talk about seeing the world together. We wanted to spend the summer after high school traveling through Europe, but she received an internship at the last minute and had to move to New York right after graduation.
"Since then we've had school, boyfriends, jobs, and anything else you can imagine come up. I had given up hope of ever really being able to travel overseas." I glanced around the restaurant, grinning from ear to ear. "I still can't believe that I'm here."
"Believe it." He chuckled.
When our food arrived, Edward twined our fingers together and showed no signs of releasing his hold. I decided not to say anything, but did a mental happy dance at the gesture. We tried some of our food as our server waited, and Edward nodded that everything was right. He murmured something to our server that I couldn't hear and returned to his meal.
I sipped my glass of water and noticed movement out of the corner of my eye. When I looked over Edward had his arm extended to me, some of his food speared his fork. My cheeks warmed and I leaned forward slightly, parting my lips so that he could feed me. I closed my mouth over the bite and allowed him to slowly slide the fork back.
Edward's eyes darkened as he watched me, his jaw tensed and flexed.
Looking directly in his eyes was too much, so I lowered mine to the table as I chewed in an effort to pull myself together. I concentrated on the food I was chewing and moaned before I could stop myself.
Edward's grip on my hand tightened.
Cautiously, I lifted my gaze up to his. My heart ached. My collarbones tingled.
I chewed on my lip, struggling to keep coherent thoughts. "Edward," I whispered.
He set his silverware down and brought his free hand up to cup my cheek. "I know."
Neither of us said a word after that. He held my hand in his lap and we continued to eat our dinner. Occasionally our eyes met, but we didn't speak.
It hadn't been tension that had us nervous. At least not on my part.
Each moment with him was more confusing than the last. I wanted to keep myself at a distance, to keep my heart at a distance.
I just didn't know if I could anymore. If I really wanted to.
After taking a deep breath, I stood in front of the full length mirror in the closet of our suite. The nightgown Alice had packed for me was sexy, yet simple. It was red and silky with lace along the straps, the top of the bust, and along the bottom hem. A red ribbon and heart pin rested just under the bust and above my tummy. It fit firmly in just the right places, but was loose enough for my growing belly.
I felt beautiful in it, but still shy. The only man I'd been with had been Jacob, and I certainly hadn't been fully pregnant with a protruding stomach at the time. Edward and I were only supposed to be an arrangement, but I was beginning to wonder how truly logical that was going to be.
With one last look in the mirror, I gathered my courage and stepped out of the closet and into the bedroom. The lights had been dimmed and candles were setup throughout the space. Edward stood over by the large window, the moon light hitting him in an almost ethereal glow. His hair and skin looked almost silver. A pair of pajama bottoms rested low on his hips.
Edward turned his head as I entered the room, his lips quirking up into a small smile.
I blushed and tucked my hair behind my ears.
"Stunning." Edward made his way over to me and took my hands in his.
My heart pounded in my chest as I breathed in his warm, masculine scent.
After a moment he scooped me up into his arms, causing an involuntary squeal from me, and carried me over to the bed. Edward settled me down in the middle of the covers, the top pillows removed and the comforter and blankets turned down. He slid in next to me and watched me carefully.
I lifted my hand up to his face and gently stroked the scruff on his cheeks before sliding my fingers into his hair. The groan that rumbled in his chest at the action made my cheeks flush with pleasure.
When he couldn't seem to wait any longer, Edward leaned forward and kissed me thoroughly. Each glide of his lips and stroke of his tongue had me simultaneously melting and heating to the core. His hand that had been resting on the mattress beside me held my side firmly, his thumb just under my breast.
I gasped when he pulled his lips from mine and kissed his way down my neck, licking and sucking my skin teasingly. I moaned softly at the wonderful sensation.
Edward squeezed me gently before he ran his hand up and down my side. He nipped my collarbone before I felt his lips just under my ear, kissing in that spot that made me tremble. The straps of the nightgown fell down around my shoulders and loosened the top slightly.
I couldn't think, I couldn't even move. My hands remained in his hair, tugging on the soft strands.
It wasn't until Edward's hand rubbed over my stomach, though, that things shifted. Normally he seemed to love it, but something in him tensed as his fingers splayed over my baby bump. He pulled his lips from mine and sat up slightly so that he still hovered over me, but made no move either way. Our breaths came out in pants and Edward seemed to be warring with himself.
"Edward?" I asked, breathlessly.
He squeezed his eyes shut tightly, seemingly in pain.
"Edward, what's wrong?"
He didn't say anything, just pulled all the way from me and sat up. His back rose and fell with each breath, and eventually slowed down. After what felt like hours, Edward turned his head slightly toward me, not meeting my eyes, and said, "Maybe this isn't such a good idea right now."
I blinked in confusion and managed to pull the straps of the gown back up. His words didn't register at first, but when they did I wanted to run and hide. It didn't make any sense. We'd been flirting with one another for two days. He'd basically told me earlier that day that he'd wanted to get me into bed.
Only, when we were finally alone and he had the chance, he stopped. Why would he? Unless… There was only one answer.
He didn't want me.
Edward didn't want me.
"Oh. Okay." I couldn't think of anything else to say.
"Bella," he started to say.
Before he could respond any further, I climbed as quickly as I could out of the bed and raced from the room, holding back tears. Edward didn't come after and I didn't really know how I felt about that. Too many other thoughts and emotions were coursing through me for that one to truly register.
I managed to find a blanket in a closet in the living room and wrapped it around my shoulders before settling down on one of the large couches. Then I turned on the television, stopping on a random station, and cried.
Everything that I had been feeling since seeing Jacob at the wedding, dancing around Edward and my feelings for him, and then his rejection came pouring out of me. Horrible, deep sobs racked through my body and I gave myself over to them. It felt good, cleansing.
My cheeks were soaked with tears, my eyes burning, but I couldn't find it in me to care. I curled up on my side, one hand on my stomach and continued to cry until I fell asleep.
I'm not sure what else to say except trust me. There is a plan and a reason for what's happened.
Thank you so much continuing to read this story and for loving it. I do, too. This Edward and Bella are my favorite.