Edward didn't say a thing to me but I needed to be close to him and I think he needed me to be close to him too, so I took a seat on his bed, right next to him. Jasper came to sit next to me on his own bed.

He immediately took the bottle of tequila and handed me a shot. He had turned around to get some lemon and salt but was surprised to see my shot glass empty. "I guess we're going straight today" he chuckled.

I smiled at him.

"How are you Bella?" that was Anna. I hate that I couldn't hate her, she was actually nice but still…

"I'm fine, what about you?" I asked being polite and all. "I'm good" she answered.

"So what was all that?" she asked and sipped her beer. I looked at Edward, he was also drinking beer. I wondered where Emmet and Mike were.

"Oh just some school drama" I winked at her, but all I really wanted to do was shove her out of this room.

I wanted to ask Jasper another drink when Edward suddenly took my arm harshly, "What is this" he hissed. I looked to see what he was talking about and saw fingerprints on my arm, they had already turned blue. How had I not noticed this before?

I pulled my arm back and looked away. "Bella?" Edward said impatiently. "That girl Noa, she had stopped me by gripping my arm" I explained to him.

"Fucking bitch" he muttered.

Emmet and Mike walked in at that moment. "Hey Bella, you're here!" Mike yelled with a smile. I nodded and smiled back at him.

"Anna, the girls are looking for you. They want to go out" Emmet said to her and I could have kissed the hell out of him.

"I'm in no mood to go out with them actually" NO! "But I'll go anyway before they start bitching" she continued and got up. Hell yeah, good bye Blondie!

"Are you guys coming with us? We're going out" Emmet said referring to me and Edward. I shook my head, "I'm staying but you should go" I said to Edward while I hoped he would say no and stay with me.

"No, I'm not going either. I'm staying with you" he told me. I looked at him and wanted to thank him but then what happened at the beach came to my mind up and I just looked away.

"They can stay but you're coming with us" Mike said to Jasper.

"I don't know. Bella, I can stay if you want" he said sounding unsure. "Nonsense Jazz, go out and have some fun. Really" I encouraged him. He didn't came here to stay in his hotel room. Besides he really needed to relax. Maria was getting on his nerves and this was the only way to get away from it.

"Okay then, but tomorrow we're really finishing that bottle" he replied with a big smile. I nodded and smiled back at him. He really was a good friend. So selfless, always thinking about others. I was really happy to have a friend like him.

After they all left, it was just me and Edward.

"I need a shot" I muttered and went for the tequila. "Look at you, until yesterday you weren't even drinking and now you're all about shots" Edward said sarcastically.

"I'm in the mood for it, so may I?" I asked him harshly.

"You going to tell me what your problem is, for real?" he asked as he pulled the bottle out of my mind. "Hello, weren't you there when all that shit happened?" I rolled my eyes while my heart hurt so badly but I wasn't going to show him that.

"Stop. Just stop this act" he sighed "I'm so mad at you for pushing me away on that train" he continued slowly causing me to look at him in shock.

"You. Are. Mad. At. Me?" I gritted through my teeth as I pointed a finger to him. "You don't get to be mad at me Edward, you understand that?" I told him as tears formed in my eyes.

"Get it out, come on" he urged me on as his eyes darkened. He was livid.

"You! You left me at the beach! You just went away with her without even giving a shit about me! You couldn't even bother to tell me! You left me alone so you could spend time with her! It's always her! Her! Her!" I finished and found it hard to breath.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and looked away.

"You don't get to be mad at me! Because if you didn't leave me today, you would have been there when Mrs. Thickens walked up to me to tell me how awful I am, you would have been there when those students attacked me verbally. You would have been there! But you weren't, were you?" I continued madly and took deep breaths. I was NOT going to cry.

"I'm so sorry Bella" Edward took me in his arms and hugged me tightly. "You're right, I shouldn't have left like that. We just were going for a short walk but then got to talking and we didn't even realize that-"

"Just stop, I don't want to hear about it" I stopped him but kept holding on to him. I needed him.

"I'm really sorry" he whispered in my ear and just like that I forgave him. "Just don't do it again…please" I cried and felt empty. It was like life was sucked out of me. I couldn't feel a thing anymore.

"I'm here, I swear" he promised and I believed him. Edward wouldn't lie to me. "Now stop crying, it doesn't look good on you" he said trying to lighten the mood.

"Fuck you" I answered and hit his chest as a small smile crept up to my face.

"Now what do you think about having some fun with this?" He said and held a bottle of vodka out to me. My smile got bigger as I nodded furiously. I wanted to get drunk and forget everything.

"This is so much better than tequila" Edward commented as he did his third shot. "I like them both but it's like this has a faster effect" I grinned at him.

Yesterday when we were drinking tequila, I didn't really feel anything until the fifth shot but now after the third shot of vodka, I felt like I was tipsy already. It could also be because we weren't really going slow.

"Okay, you are going to slow down a bit missy" he said and took my glass. I pouted but didn't argue him.

"Edward, tell me honestly, did you rather go out than sit here?" I really wanted to know that because I felt guilty that he was staying in because of my.

"I had rather gone out…but only if you had come too. It's not fun without you Bells, so I am rather here with you than outside without you" he explained as his hand played with my hair. It felt good.

"Thanks" I answered feeling very happy. "Turn around so I can comb your hair" he said surprising me but I just did what he told me and handed him my brush.

For a while he just combed my hair without either of us saying anything. It felt good, but also a bit strange… It was different.

"Your hair really smells good" he said breaking the silence. "Thanks, I guess" I replied unsurely. "How are you feeling Bells?" he asked as he put my hairbrush away and I immediately missed the soft touch of his hands on my hair. What the hell, I wondered.

It was probably the alcohol that made me think like this, I thought by myself.

"Uh…I'm better right now. It's all out you know…not only what happened today but just everything. It was like I was finally able to let everything go" I told him, shocked that the words were coming so easily to me.

"I noticed. It was bound to happen and you know that…but this is good, you can let it go now" Edward said and got comfortable on his bed. I did the same and took the seat next to him.

"I'm just embarrassed about how it happened. I broke down in front of everyone " I whispered and looked down. "Hey," he pulled my chin up with his finger, "fuck them. Don't give a shit about what they think. The ones who truly give a shit about you, know the real you and they don't care that you broke down like that" he then finished it by giving me another hug.

"Now" he pulled away with a smirk on his face, "we're finishing this bottle because I want to get you drunk" he joked… I think, and then poured us two shots.

We kept talking through the night, taking a shot now and then, just enjoying the only time we were alone. It felt incredibly good to have Edward to my own.

Around two am in the morning Jasper, Emmet and Mike returned. We talked with them for a while but as soon as their heads touched their pillows, they were out cold.

At this point I was lying next to Edward on his bed but in a position in which we could face each other. The only thing that separated our bodies was his sheet, I was lying under it since I felt cold a bit earlier. But now with the effect of the alcohol I felt like my body was on fire.

"You're drunk" he smirked at me.

"I'm not" I giggled but that was cut short when suddenly he started to play with my hair.

I have no idea how long we were silent just looking at each other and I definitely don't remember putting my hand on his head but suddenly I was massaging his scalp softly. I could see that he liked it so I didn't stop.

I couldn't also stop myself from looking at his lips…Suddenly all I wanted was for him to crash his lips to mine. I want to pull the sheet off and cover my body with his.

What the hell, I thought.

Suddenly Elena's name came to my mind. I gasped and pulled my hand away. It seemed to break the spell we were under.

"You should go sleep" Edward whispered sounding strange.

"Yeah, I should go to my room" I said and got up quickly. "I'll take you there" he replied and was getting up too when I stopped him.

"No need for that, I'll get there" I smiled at him and then left his room without looking back at him.

What in the hell was that?

I had never thought of Edward like that and suddenly I wanted him to kiss me, and maybe even other stuff? What in the hell was wrong with me?! He had a girlfriend….

I stopped thinking about it when I entered my room and immediately ran to my bed. I giggled as I slipped and fell on the ground. He was right though, I was drunk.


I was writing in my notebook when there was a soft knock on my door. I opened my door and gasped when I saw Edward. "Edward, what are y-" he cut me off by placing his finger on my lips. He closed the door behind him as I slowly backed away from him. But that didn't stop him from getting to me.

His eyes were a shade of dark I had never seen before and he was breathing heavily as he walked slowly to me. I looked at him wondering what his next step would be.

"I can't hold back anymore" he whispered as his face was dangerously close to mine. "Then don't" I answered softly wondering where in the hell I was finding my courage. That was all he needed before he placed his mouth on mine. Fuck! How could I have missed this for such a long time.

While he kissed me roughly, his hands wandered on my body. They finally rested on my ass as he pulled me to him.

"Please don't tease me" I groaned as his hand slipped under my shirt, his lips on my neck. "Fuck, I want you Bella" Edward moaned and then crashed his lips to mine. His tongue pushed roughly in to my mouth battling with my own. Oh boy, how sweet he tasted. I could never get enough of this.

"Tell me what you want Bella" he whispered in my ear as he turned my body so my back was facing his chest. One of his hands cupped one of my breast while the other went lower…and lower.

I bolted upright in my bed, gasping for air while my dream was going on repeat in my head.

"I am so screwed" I realized.

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