Disclaimer: I do not own Priest

When I first saw him I thought it was God testing me. Testing my will, my commitment to the cause. I was but a child still and melodramatic. He came to us barely a man. I wanted to know him. We have no names to call each other by, we are simply the Priests of the Church, of God. I named him Wind. I gave all of them names. What else could I do? A desire was growing inside of me.

We didn't speak for three months. As a new recruit there would be little interaction between the two of us. I had been there for six years already-but had yet to see battle. The church found me as a young girl in my town, surviving an encounter with a host of vampires through blind luck and an iron door. They decreed it God's will that I lived while my mother died. There was no body for me to grieve over. I threw myself into the training. I wish I had known than that those were going to be some of the happiest times of my life. I might have lingered there more.

I watched him train. He gave himself into the pain. All of us do. Whispers followed him, a wife, a child, love. I clinched my teeth and told myself it was nothing but hunger. I knew he was going to be the best of us. We met in a moment. A team of us was gathered to hunt a small group of vampires that were nesting in some caves. There were five of us. It was going to be my first taste of blood.

As we drew closer to the nest my body started to betray me. Small shivers crawled on my skin. I tightened my hold of my blade. His eyes sought mine in question. I nodded in reply and we moved closer. I don't know how he became our leader, there were more experienced Priests there, but he drew confidence.

It was horrible. I can still hear the sounds. They had women in the cave, familiars. I can still hear the pleading. The laughing. We killed them all.

We returned victors in the battle. I was ashamed with how disgusted I felt. It was God's will but I still couldn't get the blood out of my clothing. I sobbed in the shower. His hands touched me before we ever spoke. A comforting hand that in my panic I slammed to the ground. He grinned up at me as I apologized. I didn't understand what he was offering. All I could see before me was the dead bodies I had killed. Women with blue eyes. I fell back onto the floor and let the water pour into me-half hoping that I would drown. He laid beside me. Not touching. It was friendship that he was offering.

It was sinful for me to want more.