I was standing out side, smoking a cigarette, after a concert ended. I didnt have a clue who was playing that night. I went for the fun of going to concerts. A man who looked to be about six foot, step out side from the back stage door. He didnt notice me at first. But then again I was pretty well hidden by the darkness. I watched him pull out a cigarette from the box he had in his back pocket. He felt around for a lighter. "Fuck." I heard him mumble.
I spoke up. "You need a light?"
He jumped about 10 feet into the air. "When did you get there?"
"I've been here since the middle of the concert. I couldnt handle all the scream teenage girls in there. You need a light?"
"Uhhh, yeah... Sorry about all those teenagers. I dont know what it is about me that makes them go all crazy like that. I'm pretty sure half of them dont even listen to the music, which is a shame. Most of my songs have deep meanings to them, and if those girls actually listened they would be singing along and not screaming." I lite up my lighter and he lite his cigarette. He took a drag then exhaled. "Did you like what you heard?"
"Well," I paused as I searched for the right words. "I couldnt really hear much. I mean over all those screaming fans of yours."
I still had no idea who this guy really was. All I knew is he was in the band that played tonight. "Maybe I could play for you sometime?" He asked.
"I dont have anywhere to be, you could play now. Unless you dont want to. You did just play a show."
"I love playing music, thats why I do it for a living. Here follow me." He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the tour bus. A crowd of girls practically surrounded it. He turned to me. "Uh... You ready to face this horror?"
"I go to concerts for a living. I get in the middle of mosh pits all the time. This is nothing."
I lead him through the crowd of girls. We got into the bus unharmed... This man was missing a few pieces of his shirt though. "Crazy fans you got there. You practically got stripped." I said laughing a little.
"It sucks too. This was my favorite shirt."
I laugh at him more. He joins in with me. Now that we were in a decently light area I finally got a good look at this man. He was really tall, around six foot like I thought. He had dark brown hair that had a little bit of green in it. His blue and white striped tank top what ripped in multiple spots. He was wearing tight jeans, but they were still loose. He wasnt wearing any shoes either. On his left foot there was a peace sign tattooed. He was holding a sailors hat in his hands. "Well, I'm Christofer, as you probably already know."
"Well actually Christofer, I didnt know. I came tonight just because it was a concert on a night I happened to be free. I'm Violet."
"Hello Violet!" He said really enthusiastically.
"You were gonna play for me?"
He slapped his hand against his forehead, and mumbled something I couldnt quite make out, since it was quite in the bus the ringing got louder in my ears. I shook my head a little to try and get the ringing to stop. He noticed. "Are you tired?" He asked.
"No, not at all. I'm just trying to get my ears to work properly again."
He chuckled a little, damn his laugh was cute. He picked up a guitar that was sitting on a couch, He patted the space next him. "Come sit next to me, please?"
I sat down on the right side of him, so I wouldnt get in the way of his playing. He closed his eyes and started singing. I'm in trouble. He started strumming I'm an addict, I'm addicted to this girl. She's got my heart tied in a knot and my stomach in a whirl.
He finished the song and went on to the next one. The next song was much shorter. During the solo part, he talked to me about how its supposed to be played with a ukulele. Then after that song he played one more. I wanted him to play more. His voice was pure gold, I could listen to it all night long. It wasnt just his sing voice that was gold, but also his normal talking voice.
He took another cigarette out of the box in his back pocket. He offered me one, and I gladly took one. I lite up mine and then gave him my lighter. We sat there in silence for what seemed like days. "So... did you like it?" he asked.
"Yeah, it was amazing. That first song, I could tell that you didnt want things to end between you and your girlfriend just because of a cell phone. Then the second song, thats was when you didnt really know your girlfriend but you saw her, and you knew you two would end up together. Then the last song, you really just want to run away with her. And your voice is amazing"
"I dont have a girlfriend, well I did a while ago... but we broke up. She didnt like that I put music before her. She always had to be put first in my life. But hey if I write a song about you, you have to feel pretty speacial." He looked down to the ground. "So, Violet... Tell me more about yourself. "
"Oh... put me on the spot why dont you. Lets see here, I was born in Ireland. Both of my parents are Irish, they grew up there. I spent part of my life there. When I was 5 my parents wanted to move out to the US, so of course pick one of the bigger cities... We ended up here in California."
"Can you still do a Irish accent?" Chris was looking at me wide eyed.
"If you listen closely you can still hear it in my voice a little bit."
He smiled. I wanted to melt just by looking at that smile. "I love girls with Irish heritage, and you were born there, and partly raised there! And you still have somewhat of an accent..."
I cut him off. "Woah Chris... slow down you dont need to fan girl over me and my Irish heritage."
"Sorry." He look at the ground, "I dont mean to be a fangirl... if thats what you want to call it. If I had a type I would have to say, my type would be dark haired, green eyed, irish girls, who are also somewhat short." He smiled again.
I laughed at him. I took a few more drags of my cigareette before I put it out. I asked him "What about you Chris? How did you end up in this bus tonight with screaming fan girls out side?"
He took a few senconds. "It started back in Joplin, Missouri. I was a young one, about 14, when I first started smoking these. " He lifted up a new cigarette. "My parents didnt really appriciate that I spent more time playing my guitar than caring about school... I told my mom that I wanted to go, and leave the town that was so crule to me. She didnt like that very much. At 16 I started smoking the green, and I was living in my car. I wanted to prove to my parents that I could make a living by playing music. Then one day when I was playing my guitar out side some store this guy walked passed and asked if I could maybe play for his boss. HIs boss was a music producer for loveway records. They ended up signing me. And here I am now. sitting on this bus, with a really beautiful Irish girl, and screaming teenage girls outside."
I was so blown away by his story that I didnt even realize that he called me beautiful. I noticed that Chris is still looking at me with a girn on his face. "Oh what is that smile all about?" I say with a little more of my irish accent coming out than I wanted.
His smile grew about 10 times larger. He had suddenly looked away from me. I wanted him to look at me, he is the only guy that has actually looked at me without thinking I'm just some weird chick. "Chris?" I asked, my voice sounded a little uneven. He looked back at me.
"Violet..." the fan girls were getting louder. I could even make out what some of they were saying. It was mostly 'Chris I love you' and 'I want to marry you Chris' . I took a quick glance at Chris.
"Want to get rid of them?"
He nodded his head with a relieved look on his face. "Okay, I have an idea."
I pushed open the door, Chris had his arms around my waist, and his head burring its self in my neck. "I'm sorry girls... but Chris is kind of taken, I know he hasnt made our relationship know to the public yet. He just wanted some time to cherrish it before people started bugging him about it. Please just leave him alone for the night, we were trying to do things in here, if you all know what I mean, which you guys should you are all teenagers."
Chris lift up his head a little and said "You all know how I just want happiness in the world, and I love all of you. I just love this one here in a different way then I love you guys." He tightened up his grip around my waist then added, "Will you all understand that I want you all to be happy for me, I think I may have found the one here."
Some of the girls nodded, while the rest gave me dirty looks. Chris relased his grip and grabed my hand to pull me back into the bus. The door slammed shut and Chris reached around me to lock it. "Thank you Violet." was all he said before he went and sat back down on the couch.
The bus started to rock back and forth. These fan girls obviously werent happy with what I had to say. Chris jumped off the couch and ran to the bus driver. The buses engine turned on. Chris must have told the driver to start driving. I heard the driver talk into a walkie talkie, "I need the rest of the band in here. We need to take off now. Fans have started to rock the bus. Make sure everyone has a body gaurd, I'm not sure how the girls will react."
A few minutes later the rest of the band made their way into the bus. "Hey Chris, whose your little friend?" A guy with light brown hair asked.
Chris got protective and put his arms around my waist again. "Taylor, this is Violet. Violet this is the Bassist of Never Shout Never." He points to the other man that has a darker brown hair color. "That's Hayden, he's the drummer. He can also play guitar."
Taylor moved closer to Chris and I. He put his hand under my chin and pushed it up so he could get a better look at my face. "Chis she's really cute. Where did you find this one?"
Chris tightened his grip. "Taylor. Dont. Even. Try. It. She doesnt need to be played. Besides she's too good of a person to fall for your tricks."
"Chris what tricks are you talking about? Its not my fault that girls fall for me just as much as they fall for you." He turned his attention to me. "I heard this thing that bassists are better in with their finger when it comes to ladies because we can move our fingers faster than guitarists." He winked at me.
"Taylor, I dated a bassist once. He wasnt that good with his fingers. I mean he was the best boyfriend in the world. He just wasnt that good with his fingers." I said trying to get him to leave me alone. I just wanted to be alone with Chris, just so I could talk to him more. I have a really overwhelming feeling that I can tell Chris anything and he wont judge me. I want to tell him about my past, how I'm not this amazing girl that he sees.
Hayden pulled Taylor into the bunk area of bus. Chris had loosened his grip around me when the room. I pulled myself out of Chris' grip and sat on the couch. I had my arms in my lap. My eyes started looking up and down my forearms, noticing every scar that lies there. They may not be visible to anyone else, but to me its like they never healed. It may always be that way. My mother begged me to put scar removal cream on them, but I never listened, I just kept adding to the hundreds of scars that were already there.
Chris sat down next to me. "Violet are you okay? I really hope Taylor didnt bring you down. He can be like that sometimes when there is a new girl in my life. It's like he never understands that I just want to be happy, with someone in my life."
"Oh no Taylor didnt get me down. I'm just remember my past. I mean its not what you'd call the best past in the world. But everyone hates their past. So what would make me any different. I guess I'm not really proud of my past. Well at least my highschool year. Those were probably the worst years of my life. I was the outcast." Tears started to form in my eyes. "I was never accepted. I had no one to talk to, everyone thought I was weird. They practically saw me grow up. I started school with them and I finished school with them. But when High school started my friends that I had in Junior High, they left saying that they couldnt be friends with some chick from another country. Guys would swoon over me in junior high. In high school, they wouldnt even look at me. I couldnt handle it anymore. I wasnt until My senior year that I finally put an end to that horrible addiction. It never accorded to me that what I was doing was an addiction, well until I started a blog on this one website. I followed a lot of other self harm blogs. Ones that looked a lot like mine. Then some people who went so school with me, they found it then a what seemed like the entire school, started sending me messages, telling me just to go kill myself, that I was a fat whore and needed to die. I couldnt take it anymore. I started smoking when I turned 15." The tears fell form my eyes. Chris let me continue, but he cried with me. " My junior year I couldnt take it anymore. So I cut a little to deep. I ended up in the hospital for about 2 weeks, and they put me in an insane asylem for about half a year. It didnt really work. I started the addiction again after I got out, after six months of being clean. Then when I finally wanted to get better... I believed in my self, and I did. Then my mother got disgusted with all of the scars and bought me a shit ton of scar removal. I never used it. I wanted to keep the scars as a reminder that I got through the four horrible years of the addiction. "
Chris wrapped his arms around me, trying to comfort me. I lcontinued to look over my forearms. "Each and every one has a different time some one told me I should go die, or I was just looking for attention."
"See this is why I hate people. They hate on you your entire life, they put you down. Then when your gone they think that it you were the best person ever, how you were really beautiful. I hate sociotey. I've tried, with my music, to change the way people think. But it doesnt work. They only like me for my looks."
I escaped his grip. The bus started moving, and I fell back onto the couch. Two people came out from the drivers area. "Hey Chris." They said at the same time. "Looks like you get to have fun tonight."
"Josh, Gerard. Stop. We are only friends. Besides I just met her tonight. I have no intentions of ever using her like that."
"Oh well, I'm Josh, if you want I can make your night better. Because it looks like Chris over hear has made you cry. A pretty little thing like you doesnt need to cry." Josh had long black hair that covered his eyes a little bit, and his lips pireced.
I hid my head in Chris's shoulder. I was tired of being hit on. I really just needed to get out of here. Maybe then I'll forget that I am really falling for Chris, and maybe he'll forget about me. "I should be getting home." I whisper to Chris
I felt the muscles loosen in his face. He was upset. "Gerard, please take Josh and yourself back up to the drivers area, after all you two are back up drivers when we are on the road."
Gerard nodded and pulled Joah along with him.
"Violet, you dont have to go. You know what... oh never mind"
I lifted my head and turned away from him. I took my lighter out of my pocket. I kept lighting it, over and over again. Chris got annoyed and took it away. "Violet," He started. "You are so beautiful. I know its a little early, since we just met, but I can tell that you like me. You wouldnt have told me your whole story if you didnt trust me. So this is me asking, Violet, will you please come on tour with me?"
My eyes filled with tears again. "I dont know Chris. Maybe having me in your life isnt such a good thing. I mean all I can really bring is bad."
"I dont care! If I get to look at your beautiful face everyday I'll be fine!"