Author's Note: *crawls out from under rock.*
Hi there! Don't worry, this author's note is not one of those "this fic will never be finished, but thank you for your time" author's notes. The following is an actual chapter! even though it's almost been one whole year since the last one (I suck I'm so sorry). And there will be more to come.
First off, I owe the readers of this fic, especially the ones who have continued to encourage me to finish this even after all this time, an apology. I'm sorry that I deserted this for so long while simultaneously promising on my tumblr and etc. that I was working on it (although I really was working on it, I just hated everything I was working on lol). To put it shortly, I went through some hard times this last year and my will to write all of my projects, not just this one, tanked pretty severely during the hardest of those times (and when my writer's block did clear up, I needed to apply it towards my school related writing first in order to keep from like, dropping out). Along with personal troubles I've also stopped watching Glee entirely due to lack of interest, Sebastian's departure, and the Klaine proposal (lol), so that didn't help either.
Anyway, all that being said, here is the plan for this story right now, friends: as I posted on my tumblr (gastly-haunter), Should Be An Interesting Year will end here at Chapters 19 and 20, BUT. But. There will be a follow-up sequel that will follow the rest of Kurt and Sebastian's year and will include the rest of the stuff I have planned for this 'verse.
The reason I'm going to stop SBAIY here is because, as of now, I started this story two years ago. My writing style has improved a lot since then (noticeably I hope), and the inconsistencies between the (bad) very beginning and the (decent) end of this drive me insane as an author x_x lol.
So. For cohesiveness' sake and for my own sanity, the sequel to SBAIY, which will be titled On My Way To Believing (or something), will continue along with the exact same storyline as its predecessor; there will just be a divide in the story's documents to also show the divide between my past and current writing styles, and also the half-divide in Kurt and Seb's year. It will also not be posted on FF, due to all the rampantly explicit smut I plan to write (*commence wicked laughter and vague, evil hand gestures*) and will instead be posted only on Archive Of Our Own (gastlyhauntergengar), which all of you can still comment on even without accounts there if you want.
And with that, enough of me. Here is more of Kurt, Sebastian, and the second to last chapter of Should Be An Interesting Year (it leads in directly from chapter 18 btw so you may wanna go re-read it. I know I had to lol. And jsyk I wasn't going to split this up into two chapters, but I think the way I split it up actually makes sense. You'll see).
Thank you all for reading and sticking through this terrible, long thing. I'd really appreciate your feedback and thoughts on these two last pieces, as well as the upcoming continuation! Enjoy. (:
Chapter Nineteen - No Longer Invincible
Tell me, tell me, what makes you think that you are invincible?
I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure.
Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that's vulnerable,
"I meant it when I said that it's good to see you, Kurt."
"And why would there be anything good about seeing me?"
"You know how badly I get a kick out of watching you squirm. Living together, sharing close quarters with you and that steadfast gay face. You can't possibly imagine my excitement."
"It's great to see that your leaky little brain still hasn't come up with any better insults for me than 'gay face.'"
"Ohio State? Guess your big New York dreams crashed and burned?"
"They didn't crash or burn, they just changed. Change is a part of life."
"We're still together."
"Your disillusionment with how tied the two of you are is adorable."
"And your jealousy of the fact that Blaine never wanted you is so pungent that I could smell it from the parking lot."
"Blaine is irrelevant."
"Yes, he is now, isn't he?"
"Here's the thing. Apparently we're going to be spending a lot of time together—"
"As little as I can stand-"
"I plan on having sex. On the bed, on the floor, in the shower, and probably on top of that pretty little windowsill, right next to your bed."
"It's a good thing STDs aren't transferable through air contact."
"I know that you're about as prude as they come, so I'm just letting you know now, that this is a warning. I'm not up for compromise."
"Do whatever, or whoever, you want, and when Blaine comes to stay the night I'll make sure to fill you in."
"Fine. Should be an interesting year, then."
"Oh, neither can I."
Post Kurt's audition and their hot-and-heavy petting session, Sebastian and Kurt stayed in Sebastian's bed for much of the evening. Kurt was fast asleep with his back to Seb's chest, and Sebastian was wrapped around him, dozing in and out of consciousness.
Sebastian was the first of them to fully wake two hours later. He had that brief, dreamlike moment of disbelief as he stared at the back of Kurt's neck and the hints of his cheekbone and profile; before he could stop himself from thinking such ridiculous things, sometimes in these moments he thought that Kurt must've been some kind of angel who'd fallen into the worst, most undeserving hands. Sebastian shook that thought and the way his heartbeat fluttered in recognition of it, and focused on the feeling of Kurt's warm, soft skin pressed up against him. His eyes traced the curve of Kurt's shoulder and followed it down the rest of his side.
He was turned on just lying next to him; but then, when wasn't he? As per usual when he woke up with a naked boy in his arms, Sebastian immediately began to move in closer and prepare Kurt for part two: kissing the back of Kurt's neck, running his palms up and down his smooth thighs, taking his time to try and wind Kurt up so he could prove, to himself, that Kurt's body wanted to be impressed by his.
Kurt hummed and began to shift in Sebastian's arms. Chills began to rise across his skin and Sebastian smiled, kept on going, gently rocking his body up against Kurt's in a slow, persistent rhythm, continuing to kiss a tacky hickey onto one of his favorite spots.
Kurt came to his senses slowly, only half-aware at first of Seb's tongue tracing patterns across his neck, of the pinch and suck of Seb's lips, of Seb's erection pressed into the back of his thigh and the way the sensations he was waking to were making his blood start to flow south.
Dizzily, Kurt opened his eyes and stared at the wall he was facing. He gasped softly when Sebastian gently bit the nape of his neck, tensing all over at the feeling of it. Then for a moment, the physical sensations fell flat-he remembered where he was, where he lived with this boy who was still a stranger when it came to this kind of kissing, when it came to sex, and he suddenly felt that Sebastian was too close for comfort.
He shrugged away the arm that Sebastian had wrapped over his shoulder.
"Hi," Sebastian muttered. He put his arm back where he thought it belonged, pulled Kurt in again, and sucked on his earlobe. "Glad you're up," he whispered.
Kurt tried, once more, to shrug him off, actually sliding himself away across the bed a little, but Sebastian only held him closer and moved his hands down to his hips. Sebastian's cock twitched as he gazed down at the dip in Kurt's lower back, imagined how much more that back would curve for him once he was nine-inches into it.
"God I wanna fuck you so bad, Kurt." Seb squeezed and vice-gripped Kurt's hips, causing a little groan to slip from Kurt's mouth against his will.
"Alright," Kurt gasped out, shivering, "that's enough."
Kurt shrugged him off again, harsher this time. He sighed and turned onto his other side to face Sebastian, to look him in eye and try to stare some sense into those hormones-they'd talked about this, Kurt wasn't ready and it was like Seb wasn't even listening-but Sebastian blindly took Kurt's open face as an open invitation. Eyes hazed over and trained on Kurt's crotch, he leaned in, mouthed the flushed spot on Kurt's neck where he still wanted that hickey to form, wrapped his arms around Kurt's body to greedily palm at his ass and slowly grind against him.
"I mean it, Sebastian." Kurt ignored the spike in his arousal at the feeling of Seb biting into his neck one more time, the feeling of Seb's cock pulsing once against his abdomen. "Enough-"
Sebastian pulled back, groaned at him, and snapped.
"If you're not going to let me fuck you while you're naked in my bed and asking for it, could you at least put some fucking clothes on?"
Kurt shoved a pillow right into Sebastian's face.
"You are such an asshole-"
Kurt was out of the bed within seconds.
Sebastian sat up, struck with an instant, sinking feeling of regret as he watched Kurt kick their wet clothes off the Dior rug and scramble around his closet looking for sweats and a sweatshirt to throw on.
"Kurt, you know I didn't mean it," he heard himself saying. He moved to stand up and tried to follow Kurt as he hastily pulled on clothes and slipped on slippers on his way towards the door, but Kurt was silent in protest and wouldn't even look at him. "I didn't mean it, I sw—"
Kurt slammed the door shut behind him on his way out, right in Sebastian's face.
Sebastian clenched his fists and threw his back against the door, frustrated at himself. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and played back mental images of the countless other fucks he'd had who used to let him have his way with them, whenever he chose them. Sebastian thought about the way they were always open to him, that automatic access, that carnal drive and that ease of knowing his lust could always be taken out on his many, willing and consenting partners, on nameless and faceless bodies being fucked or fucking him.
Sebastian thought about his old, selfish self. And when he opened his eyes again, he stared back down at his stubborn erection-it'd gotten harder after watching Kurt storm out.
Sebastian hissed as he brought a hand to it, curled around it and began to jack himself off so roughly and routinely that it felt just as much like a punishment as it did a quick, meaningless release.
As he finished, trying to catch his breath back, he stared down at the roses that had been discarded on the floor by Kurt, half-buried in the pile of their clothes. He'd never really believed in instant karma before now, but he was starting to guess that this is what it must've felt like as he went to pick up the flowers, and then throw them at the wastebasket near his desk.
Smythe - 0.
Kurt spent the next couple hours hidden away in a cubicle at the library. Now that he was done with his Theater final, he just had a Bio and a Math test to finish before he was free to get away from the stress of Ohio State for a while, and finally relax at home.
It'd been easy to buckle down and get some reviewing done for the first two hours he was there-he'd taken the sudden burst of anger at Sebastian's callousness that he'd felt and channeled it into the furious highlighting and memorization of formulas. By the time the third hour hit, however, Kurt's steam was cooling off and it was getting harder and harder to concentrate.
It was at that point that Kurt started checking his phone; watching the minutes tick, absently, frustratedly waiting for something to show up. He burrowed his head into one of the sleeves of his sweatshirt, still feeling a little of that post-orgasm relief; there was a tension that was gone from his body, and he still remembered what it felt like to have hands all over him, lips all over him, to be jerked off. But Kurt also felt a dullness, an emptiness that he didn't know how to fill now. He grunted, trying to black out those images of Sebastian hovering over him, gazing down at him with hungry, lusting eyes.
It cannot, happen again, Kurt told himself, even as his body warmed up to those memories, betraying his head. He felt so stupid; what had he been thinking earlier when he'd kissed Sebastian so hard in the rain, and imagined that Sebastian could give him romance and true happiness?
He sat up again. Thinking about Sebastian was futile; he should've been focusing on what was important: his future. Tomorrow was the day he'd find out about his Theater major classes, for example; Theater was what Kurt Hummel had set out to do when he gotten to Ohio State in September, but then again he'd set out to do a lot of things. And the first of them was not having anything his safe, warm, comfortable little Lima-world that he'd had before September change, if he could help it.
Look where he was now. The way that Kurt was feeling now, come December-always slightly dissatisfied under the surface of things, always on the verge of breaking unless he let Sebastian dry hump him into corporeal, hazelike bliss, conflicted with a foot in the past, a foot in the future-it was all so unsettling when he sat down to think about it. The way that Kurt was feeling now was not a part of the future he'd planned his senior year.
Kurt sighed, opened up the front-facing camera on his phone to look at himself. Oh my god-he couldn't believe he'd walked out this way. His hair was unkempt. His complexion was blotchy and he hadn't moisturized all night. His eyes were darkened with small shadows cast beneath them, from lack of peaceful sleep. And he realized now that the Dalton sweatshirt he'd scooped off the floor of his closet earlier belonged to Sebastian, not him; it smelled like a faint mixture of sweat and bitter cologne, making him feel even worse and even more like he needed a shower.
What was going to become of him now? he thought. When he got back home, and saw all of his Lima friends-Rachel, Mercedes Finn-was this dishevelment what he was going to have to show for himself?
Kurt wasn't going to get any work done feeling like this, and smelling faintly of Sebastian. And he knew better now than to try and avoid going back to the room for the rest of the night, where his most fixable problem at the moment was obstinately waiting for him. He walked across the icy campus, towards that problem; he closed himself inside the damp, dorm elevator where he'd been just hours ago, pressed up against that wall with Sebastian's body pressed against his, with Sebastian's cold hand feeling down his pants for the first time.
The elevator doors opened, cutting off that image, and Kurt unlocked the door to the room. Not only did he find Sebastian asleep on his bed, only half-dressed, glasses still on and head propped on top of his open history textbook, but he also noticed that the roses-his, very romantic, roses-were half hanging out of Sebastian's trashcan as a sign of defeat.
Kurt's heart did something strange as he quickly, defensively went to pick the roses up out of the bin. They really were very beautiful-full, fresh, a gorgeous shade of red, and even if they did come from someone as blunt and rough-around-the-edges as Sebastian, Kurt's heart felt is though it still wanted to keep them. He walked them over to his desk and placed the stems into a half-full water bottle he'd left there earlier, and then felt a sense of dread when he realized that now he needed to deal with the person the roses were from.
Kurt sighed, taking the high road reluctantly, and went to the edge of Sebastian's bed to reach in and at least take the glasses off his face, so they wouldn't break-that would've caused a tantrum from the spoiled rich boy, he was sure.
The moment he nudged them from Sebastian's nose, Sebastian flinched and woke up, and Kurt froze; Sebastian came to and gazed up at Kurt with sleepy, glassy eyes and the image of them, at first, made Kurt want to go soft; Sebastian looked so harmless.
Kurt remembered to stand his ground, instead, standing up straight. He cleared his throat, voice thin with passive aggression.
"So sorry to wake you," he declared.
Sebastian shifted himself up on his arms, looking around in confusion like he hadn't meant to drift off. He then swallowed, guilt spreading itself all over his features and reaching his tired eyes especially-they looked more distressed than Kurt had ever seen them for a moment, and it caught him off guard before the distress vanished back into something harder, more tangible.
"Look."Sebastian stared Kurt in the eyes for a moment. "I know you're still pissed at me. What I said to you was-stupid, and I know that there's no excuse for it. But." There was a childish lilt to Sebastian's voice as he glanced away-it made Kurt's stomach flip and his head swim. Sebastian looked up at him again and asked,
"But will you still sleep with me tonight, please?"
Kurt wanted to go weak at that look. He hesitated.
"When I say no," he asserted. "I mean no, Sebastian."
Sebastian's mouth twitched and he ducked his head. Kurt realized that this is what shame must've looked like on that otherwise guarded and prideful face.
"Got that," Sebastian conceded.
So Kurt got into bed with him.
And Sebastian fell back asleep right away. His brows were pinched together in a frown and there was something distinctly sad about the way his expression was settling in his sleep, almost as if he were having a bad dream; as if he were always having them.
Kurt took a deep, forgiving breath and stared at Sebastian as he lay there, relatively unguarded for once. Kurt almost felt like he had an upper hand, like he could possibly do something to Sebastian while he was in this state to get him to-Kurt didn't know, admit something humiliating, or at least admit that he was flawed and breakable like everyone else, rather than so smooth and terse and impossible all the time.
But Kurt knew better than to keep on feeling like taking advantage of this boy's weakness. He simply whispered and "I don't get you" to Sebastian's closed lips, and stared down at one of Sebastian's hands, tempted to hold onto it..
Sebastian really was very young-looking sometimes, Kurt thought now as he studied his (attractive) features. Kurt used to want to feel like Sebastian was so much older than him, because of his cockiness, and his sturdier body, and that determined brow, and all that worldly experience he'd supposedly harbored by the time he was seventeen-because of the way Seb used to belittle Kurt into feeling small, like he was always making mistakes, like he was nothing in comparison.
But side by side, in this moment, Kurt recognized that he and Sebastian were both only eighteen, and that they both still had a lot of growing up to do, and that they were both tired. In this moment, Kurt did let his hand find Sebastian's, and he felt Sebastian's hand close around his and gently squeeze like it needed the companionship, and the stubborn drill sergeant in Sebastian's brain had finally laxed enough to let it reach out for something to hold, like it'd always wanted.
It was in this moment, before falling asleep for a while himself, that Kurt felt that he and Sebastian, the boy he used to hate, his roommate, his estranged Enemy, his faux-lover and Friend, were somehow, in all of this, equals.
An important recognition for him to make.
Sebastian woke up the next morning to find Kurt wrapped around him from behind, for a change.
His immediate reaction was to feel annoyed at the idea of a guy spooning him as opposed to the other way around, but there was also this warmth in his chest, this comfort at the feeling of arms around him, this relief that those arms were pale and familiar and Kurt's, that let him sink into the feeling of it and accept the moment of (almost-nauseating) weakness.
Sebastian wasn't sure who he was anymore, or if who he was right now with Kurt by his side was even reversible at this point.
He shifted a little against Kurt's smaller frame and realized that Kurt was already awake behind him.
Kurt blinked and his lashes brushed against Seb's shoulder. Seb groggily asked, "What time is it?" and Kurt's voice was closer to his ear than he'd anticipated, and it really was so much lovelier the closer it was. "Nine or so," Kurt answered.
Sebastian sunk even more into the bed. "I have a final in an hour," he stated blandly.
"Okay," Kurt muttered.
Sebastian unwrapped himself from Kurt's arms and turned over to face him, only to find that Kurt's gorgeous eyes were staring blankly down at himself, his cheeks faintly red; his eyes gave it away that he hadn't slept much, and he wasn't wearing a shirt and still seemed self-conscious about that, and for some reason it bothered Sebastian more than he cared to think about.
"You okay?" Sebastian demanded; his question came out harsher than he'd expected it to. "What's wrong?"
Kurt looked up and him and smirked just a touch.
"Well, I'm surprised you're even asking me, for one," he teased.
Sebastian rolled his eyes. "I don't have to ask, you know."
"I know you don't." Kurt's smile faded a little. "I'm okay, Sebastian."
Sebastian pressed his face into the pillow, not sure if he believed that and too exhausted to feel guilty about it.
"Don't wanna get up for my final yet," he mumbled into the pillow.
"You don't have to, you know." Kurt's hand brushed against his forearm. "A few more minutes won't kill you, right?"
"Don't know." He gulped. "They might."
Sebastian walked out of his last final of the semester, not with a sense of domination or accomplishment as usual, but with a sense of dread at the fact that soon, he would have to go back home to Westerville.
Kurt had been an ample distraction for the last couple of weeks, but now the fact that he was going to have to see his parents every day of the break and the holidays was almost unavoidable; key word, almost. Sebastian was recalling the last time he'd been in church, as he walked; thinking about his mother and the congregation watching his father in false admiration, about his father standing obstinately at the podium and god the days that he was going to have to spend in there for Christmas were going to feel so much longer now that he couldn't spend his nights fucking random guys.
Harboring half-assed resentment towards Kurt for that last bit, Sebastian dialed his dad on the phone, meaning to give the man a brief-and he meant brief-status report.
"Done with my last final," he said before Mr. Smythe had a chance to talk.
"Oh. Good, that's good." The following pause was far too long for Sebastian's taste. "So. You're coming home tonight then?"
"Not yet, I'll still be another day. Waiting for someone else to finish up their finals, then I'll be there."
"And how do you feel now that the semester's over? Proud of yourself?"
"Don't feel anything," Seb offered.
"Right." A clear of the throat, a drab tone. "Well. I'm proud of you, s-"
That was all Sebastian could stand to hear at the moment. As he walked, tall and alone through the crowded campus, he scrolled through his phone and deleted two of the new texts he'd gotten during his exam from one of his old fuck buddies. That left his old inbox full of even more discarded texts, except for the ones under the contact name 'Kurt.' He grimaced, shoved his phone back in his pocket and the reality that he had no one to talk to, especially about the things that were really bothering him under the surface-church, his family, his future-began to sink in.
Sebastian felt, pathetically, lonely for second and it made him severely hate himself for the first time in a long time.
The other day, he'd slipped up and had tried to talk to Kurt about what was going on at home now, and what had been going on since he was kid. Kurt had stooped himself low enough to at least pretend like he cared to listen, but that had been before Sebastian had screwed things up the night before, and told him he was "asking for it." Kurt couldn't've wanted to listen to Sebastian talk anymore, not after the way Sebastian had talked to him like he was just another one of his meaningless others.
Sebastian had apologized, and he had meant it, and Kurt had seemed to accept-but it had seemed too simple an obstacle for Kurt to just pass up in just one night. Didn't being talked to like that bother Kurt? Dominate in bed Sebastian was, but he'd never been one to borderline-push past someone's consent unless it were an agreed-upon part of the game, or expect that any of his fuck buddies would let him; he'd never lost his composure that much when someone said no to him, Kurt had just made him so nervous and eager to have him that he'd lost control of an impulse, and that scared him.
He just wanted yesterday evening back. He wanted the look on Kurt's face when he'd thought that Sebastian had brought him flowers, had brought him romance, had brought him all that he wanted, and Sebastian wanted it to be simple, without him having to do any real emotional work. He wanted that adrenaline feeling of looking down at Kurt's body on his bed, knowing that Kurt wanted him primally too and knowing that he could please Kurt, turn him all flustered and string him out, make him come in his hands.
Yesterday was fleeting, and it was gone, Sebastian realized as he got back to their empty room.
Some hours later, Kurt came back to the room after being out much of the day, and Sebastian would never admit that he'd been on edge, sitting around waiting for him to get back. Sebastian noticed first that Kurt was dressed well today, in a scarlet sweater and what looked to be new jeans, and second that Kurt was trying to hide a smile from perking up on his pretty lips.
"What?" Sebastian asked of him suddenly.
Kurt shyly grinned.
"I got into all of my Major classes," he announced.
And that smile was so contagious; Sebastian stood up from his bed and reached his arms out to hug him in congratulations at the same moment that Kurt stepped forward to embrace him; it was like neither of them had thought about it. Sebastian held him there for a moment feeling the warmth of their shared body heat, but as the embrace stretched on, and as Kurt settled into and sighed against his chest, he felt guilty again-like both of them were keeping this up longer than they should've, like it meant more than just an embrace and they should've been talking about it, but weren't.
Eventually Kurt seemed to go limp in his arms, letting his end of the embrace go from actual effort to meaningless lazing, and Sebastian wondered again if Kurt was really okay with Sebastian being the one to touch him, instead of Blaine.
He wondered if every time he touched this angel in his arms, he was actually hurting him, and for a moment that scared him.
He gently pushed Kurt off of him, untangling himself and trying to walk back towards his desk with even just an ounce of his pride still intact.
It was getting harder and harder to do, and he hated himself for it.
Later that night, Kurt and Sebastian were studying together in the library, in a private, closed-door study room.
Sebastian was about to quiz Kurt on his Bio terms, as Kurt sat next to him in front of a long table. In the interim, Seb was watching Kurt flip absently though his flashcards. He'd seemed out of it and distracted all evening, not that Sebastian hadn't been, either-for example Kurt was wearing this cashmere, almost-off-the-shoulder sweater that zipped all the way down the arms, and Sebastian couldn't stop staring at the way it hung across his collarbones, at the way it teased Sebastian with only glances of that body-
Sebastian held out his hand to take Kurt's flashcards for the quiz, and Kurt handed them over, sighing slightly.
"What is the series of biochemical reactions that occur in the stroma of chloroplasts during photosynthesis?" Sebastian read from the back of a card.
Kurt stared up at the ceiling with his chin in his hands, trying to rack his brain.
"Cellular respiration?" he attempted.
"Hey, I'm not 'guessing.'" Kurt stuck his tongue out and the sight of it made Sebastian's stomach flip. Kurt smiled. "I know it," he continued, "It's just that my brain feels like it's trying to fry itself."
"Look at me," Sebastian said.
Kurt did, and his smile faded a touch.
"Come on," Sebastian goaded. "The series of biochemical reactions that occur in the stroma of chloroplasts."
Kurt got tripped up for a moment at their eye contact and Sebastian stared at his lips as he faltered out another term. "Um. Oxidative-phosphorylation?"
Kurt's phone, hidden amidst a pile of books, lab binders, highlighters and study guides, suddenly buzzed against the wood of the table in front of them, effectively pulling Kurt out of the moment. Kurt sighed softly and dug around the pile to check it-it was a text back from Santana about plans for winter break-and Sebastian glared at him playfully as he did.
"No texting while I'm tutoring you," he faux-ordered. Kurt raised a brow at him. "I just don't see how much you're going to get done on your phone."
"Well excuse me," Kurt bantered, "Professor Smythe."
Sebastian closed the distance between them, guided Kurt's jaw towards him and kissed him softly, suddenly; Kurt hummed against his lips.
Sebastian pulled off. "Call me that again," he muttered.
"Professor Smythe?" Kurt repeated.
"Mm-hm." Sebastian kissed him again, longer, with more feeling.
"Ew." Kurt leaned in for another quick kiss, for another distraction. "Don't tell me you have a-weird, secret student-teacher kink or something."
"Kurt, I promise you, I have every kink in the book." Sebastian kissed him once more, and Kurt opened his mouth to let him in, and Sebastian slowly ran his hands down that gorgeous neck and pushed Kurt's sweater off one shoulder, fumbling with the zipper. "And I promise, I won't keep them a secret."
Sebastian's hands half-unzipped one sleeve, moved down Kurt's sides and then into Kurt's lap, to stroke his thighs. The feeling of Seb's hands on his legs sort of woke Kurt up and caused him to focus on the here and now-at how attuned his body had already started to become to Sebastian's hands, at how quickly they'd ended up making out in here and how he didn't mind one bit that it was happening.
Kurt braced the kiss by wrapping his arms around Seb's shoulders, pulling the two of them closer, and Sebastian slid a hand up to palm Kurt's crotch and the bulge that was beginning to form. Kurt gasped faintly and Sebastian instantly felt dizzy at the sound-he didn't think any other sound would ever fuel him as much as that one-as Kurt gave an especially hard suck at Sebastian's tongue and then pulled back to catch his breath.
"You seemed to really want me to study earlier," Kurt managed mid-gasp as Sebastian covered his neck in kisses, "And now-" Seb sucked especially hard at his collar bone, and Kurt pulled him in even closer, accepting it. "And now you're all over me-"
"I can teach you a lot more about the human body than that silly little book can," Sebastian said.
"That I don't already know?"
"I can tell by the way you react to me—" Sebastian suddenly reached out with one arm to shove all the the books off the table, picking Kurt up and then propping him onto it, gripping his thighs and thrusting against him-the sound Kurt made was absolutely thrilling-"That you're pretty still new at this." Sebastian went back to aggressively kissing Kurt's neck and stroking the outline of Kurt's erection through his jeans, Kurt moaning beside himself. "There's so much you don't know about what I could do to you," Sebastian said.
"I've had sex plenty—" Kurt attempted to reply.
"Even been bound and gagged before?" Sebastian bit Kurt's lower lip and spread his hands down Kurt's thighs. "Ever been fucked with a spreader bar pressing these pretty legs open? Ever been choked? Spanked so hard you could barely breathe?"
Kurt's hands, two paces ahead of his brain, moved down to palm Sebastian's erection through his pants. He opened his eyes when he still couldn't believe how thick, how heavy it was. He blushed, nervous; what would it even be like to have that thing inside of him? Was it even possible, or would he feel like he was being split open when he finally got it to fit? The curiosity burned in his chest-
Sebastian obliged Kurt's curious hands and quickly let down his pants and boxers, then began to unbutton his own shirt. Kurt looked down at Sebastian's body and cock, stunted by his intimidation and when Sebastian went in to kiss his swollen lips again, he whispered against his mouth,
"Could we slow down a little?"
Sebastian stepped off immediately, and Kurt, for the first time, saw raw, unadulterated fear in those hazel eyes.
Sebastian really need Kurt to want him right now, and it showed.
"Wait, I don't mean stop-" Kurt pulled him in by his shirt collar and then helped Sebastian out of the shirt entirely, and Sebastian sighed shakily, putting his hands back around Kurt's waist and squeezing it, staring at it, wanting it for his own. "Just. Slower," Kurt reminded him.
They kissed again, and Sebastian was the one who moaned this time.
Kurt got off the table and turned Sebastian so that he was the one pushed up against it. Sebastian, hands off, let Kurt lean those hips up and against his and watched as Kurt made a show of slowly zipping his sweater all the way off, staring into Seb's eyes the entire time and Sebastian thought that he was going to die just watching.
The way Sebastian's eyes raked over him, the way his lips were parted and the way he was trying to regain composure of the unshed emotion all over his face; it was as addicting as it was nervewracking for Kurt to watch-did he really have this much power over someone, over Sebastian?
Kurt peeled his undershirt off and the look of weakness of Seb's eyes as they took in his torso made him want to keep testing, to see how much he could get to him. Kurt slid one hand around the back of Seb's neck and, with the other, with Sebastian still watching, Kurt slowly unfastened his own pants and let them drop, leaving him in his boxers. Kurt noticed now the way Seb's cock was dripping with pre-come already, the way it bobbed just at the sight of Kurt and the way that Sebastian's hands were nearly trembling at his sides.
Kurt slipped his tongue into Sebastian's mouth and he guided the kiss; it was dizzying to have the control of the pace, to not feel like it was rushed, to be able to soak up the sensations. Kurt ran his hands down Sebastian's torso, taking it all in, feeling the heat of Seb's skin, and his breath hitched and he released their kiss when his hands came across six well-defined abs.
"Like those?" Sebastian managed, voice all uneven.
"They're alright," Kurt answered breathlessly. He smiled and slowly stooped down to leave a soft kiss at the base of Sebastian's abdomen, making Seb groan in frustration. Kurt pulled back to stare for a moment, at the muscles and the slight v-cut and Seb's cock; and this was why he'd always wanted to be with a hot football player or athlete, he realized, the way they looked was always so impressive and he'd always grown up shyly wishing that he could show then his zealous appreciation one day.
Kurt ran his thumb across each ab and then followed it with his tongue, unsure if what he was doing was appreciative enough and then tentatively wrapping his spare hand around Seb's cock. He stroked it slow, up all the way, down all the way, heat coiling in his stomach at the feel of it sliding in his hand. When he heard Sebastian groan up above him, he paused for a second to stare at it as he continued stroking; he knew that he was only teasing, dancing around the truth, and though a part of his brain had jumped ahead to thought of what Sebastian might taste like, to the idea of sucking all that pre-come off the head, he was still, in another much more innocent part his brain, humiliated by those thoughts, too nervous and unsure of himself to act on them.
Sebastian was slumped forward by this point, holding onto the table to brace himself. He was biting his lip to keep from spewing the slurs and profanities that were on the tip of his tongue. He wanted to take over so badly, wanted to jut himself forward, press his cock to Kurt's pink lips and watch him suck, then pin Kurt up against the wall, turn him around, fuck him senseless, but he focused all of that will power into the hands that were gripped on the edge of the table.
Kurt rose to his feet and kissed Sebastian open-mouthed, running his thumb over the tip of Seb's cock and feeling it jump against his palm. Sebastian suddenly gripped his hands around Kurt's little waist, nails grappling with the skin as a testament to his fight for control.
Kurt pulled away, out of breath, and brought his hands up to frame Sebastian's face. "Thank you for being patient."
"Fuck, you're killing me, babe-" Sebastian exhaled.
"While I am, inexperienced," Kurt said against Sebastian's lips, "I don't think I'm quite as new at this as you thought. Agreed?"
"Fine," Sebastian gave, out of breath. "You win. A little."
Kurt turned around and let Sebastian's hands pull him in close; Sebastian's grip around Kurt's waist was still vice-tight as he sucked the juncture between Kurt's neck and shoulder, and thrusted his cock shallowly up against Kurt's ass through his boxers.
"You're definitely no virgin," Sebastian said, "but you're still tight, aren't you?" He thrusted again and Kurt made the most gorgeous little cry. "You'll still stretch over my big cock for me, won't you? How well do you think you can take nine inches, Kurt?"
Sebastian wanted to see about that tonight, but unfortunately remembered that they were unprepared here. Sebastian looked frantically around the room silently cursing himself for not bringing lube or condoms with him, though it would've been terribly arrogant for him to bring them. He hadn't even thought about it earlier, about expecting that from Kurt tonight as if Kurt were so easy-
"I don't know," Kurt was saying now; he closed his eyes, slipped his own boxers off his hips a little and reveled in the feeling of Sebastian's cock rutting against his bare ass, and god did those thoughts from before feel a lot less humiliating after Sebastian talked dirty to him. "But-" Kurt tried to speak again as Sebastian kissed his neck and thrust against him once more. "B-but maybe we could try to practice." He ran two of his fingers up Sebastian's thigh as an indicator.
Sebastian moved Kurt towards the table and bent him over. Kurt propped himself up on his elbows and closed his eyes, tried to catch his breath. From this point of view Sebastian was able to really admire Kurt's ass for the first time; for a while he just stared, and then he squeezed each cheek with alternative hands, playing rough and even spanking him a little and getting off on Kurt's affirmative little sigh each time.
"I used to watch you bend over in the room when you weren't looking, back when you still thought I hated you," Sebastian said. Very slowly, he began to press a finger into Kurt and Kurt let out a little gasp, his fingers flexing gently around the table's edge; he hadn't done this without lube in a while, and while it was blunt, the intrusion was not entirely unpleasant. He sighed and concentrated on the feeling as Seb's finger went all the way in; he bit his lip.
"Can't say I didn't ever imagine you naked," Sebastian continued. He began to thrust his finger in and out, a slow pull and a steady push. Kurt's grip on the table tightened, his breaths increased, and he tried not to let a moan slip as he pictured what Sebastian must've looked like staring down at him.
"Can't say I didn't ever watch you and imagine you exactly like this-" Sebastian pulled out incredibly slow this time, and Kurt let his voice get out from under his control, tensing all over. Sebastian squeezed Kurt's ass with his spare hand and watched as Kurt's thighs began to tremble. "God your ass is incredible-"
"You were always a perv, then," Kurt managed to speak. Sebastian pushed back in and then began a steady back and forth pace; Kurt looked back at him with those gorgeous eyes and shuddered at the dull stretch. "I should've guessed-" Kurt's words slipped into gasps again as Sebastian quickened up the pace.
Sebastian was damn near grinning.
"Want a second?"
Kurt nodded. Sebastian stuck it in along with the first, slowly, and Kurt's head clunked forward on the desk once he was being stretched out by both.
"God, you are tight."
He pulled out, pushed back in. Kurt moaned and hissed a little.
"That good, baby?
"Yes-" Kurt pushed himself back on Seb's fingers. "Yes, god yes-"
Sebastian thrusted them both again and Kurt's sounds grew even louder; and Kurt was growing increasingly aware of how his body wanted actual sex out of this, how badly his cock needed friction and how little a chance there was at that happening.
"Not too loud now," Sebastian told him. "Still in a library. And I don't want anyone else out there to hear how gorgeous your voice gets when you're strung out."
"Please-I can't take it anymore, just please-"
Sebastian pulled Kurt up and held his body against him, reaching down to palm his hip and then grip his flushed cock, quickly jacking it off.
"This what you want?" He gently bit the nape of Kurt's neck and Kurt let out a sharp cry before coming into Sebastian's hand, knees going weak, red blossoming across his chest.
Sebastian finished milking the come into both of his hands to keep it off the floor, and he groaned as he felt Kurt press his ass back against his overstimulated cock; he'd been holding himself back, too.
Kurt reveled in the rush just he'd felt in orgasm, of forgetting who or where he even was; as he caught his breath, he opened his eyes to see their books pushed to the floor and he couldn't believe how lost he'd just gotten in this moment, how time had seemed to stop and how he couldn't even care.
When he turned around to face Sebastian he found that Seb was taking care of his own hard on with a hand slicked with Kurt's come.
"Bend down again for me-" Sebastian groaned. Kurt half-collapsed against the table, weak, and Sebastian finished himself off to the image of Kurt spread before him; he came in spurts all over Kurt's back.
Almost as soon as he was done, Sebastian was wiping some of his come off of Kurt with the back of his hand, panting for breath. He then gestured for Kurt to stand up and before Kurt knew it, Sebastian was kissing him, messily, passionately; and Sebastian was back to pulsing a hand around his own erection.
Kurt pulled back a little and looked down to find that Sebastian was still completely hard, even after coming.
"It does this sometimes," Sebastian said. "Or all the time."
Kurt looked up at him, nervous, for a split second and Sebastian didn't miss it on his face.
"You don't have to-" He sighed, stepping back from Kurt. "It's fine. I'll take care of it."
Kurt watched as Sebastian threw on his shirt, pants, and shoes, and then left the study room within seconds,
Leaving him alone.
Just as Kurt was about to start to gathering up his clothes, still wobbly on his legs, he heard his phone vibrating steadily on the floor beneath the pile of books.
Dizzily, he searched the floor for it. And when he pulled it out of the mess, he saw a name on the caller ID that made his body freeze, and his heart instantly drop out of his chest.
Blaine was calling.