I haven't updated in over half a year so I apologise if anyone has been wanting one. Life has gotten extremely busy and I haven't had much time to jot anything down. There are some pages that are nearly finished, about three of them. This one came to last night and it just came out very simple which I do like because sometimes I think I am over descriptive. I just wrote down how I felt and this is what came out, I hope you enjoy it and view it as a sorry for not updating since June. And reviews are awesome sauce. :D
Disclaimer: I do not own anything, all characters are owned by Square Enix and Disney.
~* Across the Universe *~
~ Page 14 - Bridge to the Sky ~
"It's okay Sora, don't be sad. I've accepted it,"
Those were your words weren't they? I still remember the sound of them, how I screamed and shouted them back at your face I can't believe that three years have passed, it seems like just yesterday. Yet it also seems like eons ago, those days that disappeared in a flash yet those long cold night feel never ending.
"Its okay Sora, please don't cry,"
You whispered, hushing me to sleep and held me in your arms. The guilt I felt, it was you that was facing the problem and yet once again it was you comforting me like you always did. I felt so selfish like I wasn't even giving you your own time and as usual you would smile and rub our noses together. I didn't realise just how much pain you were in, even though I was the one who knew you best I couldn't decipher your poker face. Even though it fills me with regret a smile manages to creep in, always you were thinking of me.
"Never stop smiling Sora, you are always most beautiful when you smile,"
The reason for my smiles has always been you, ever since I can remember. Ever since I was a little boy, it was you and your heart that made me grin. I have never forgotten your words I still do it this day even though sometimes they are lies. I'm still stung by the fact you're no longer here with me. Sometimes I do think that's it's a dream, a cruel illusion, I want to scream and I will once again wake up and be in your arms just like those days long ago.
"Sora, if I'm doing anything wrong then just stop me,"
Even if you had done something I will always forgive you. But you never did, when you pulled me close and took my lips with yours you made my dreams come true. That one moment, I'll treasure for all my lifetime. When there are days when I feel like I'm falling I'll look to that memory along with many others and pick myself up for both you and me. It was always you who was the one who was able to pick me up out of my days of misery.
"Heh…you know what Sora? Even those stars up there can't shine as much as your eyes,"
The words you would tell me, I felt exactly the same about you. The way that the night sky seemed to set your eyes alight, the way that the sun illuminated your pale skin, everything about you has always been so perfect. When I look up at the sky now, I can't help but feel so surreal. In that place where you have chosen to be I wonder, can you see me? How do I look? Am I the same boy you fell in love with all those years ago? I hope that my actions continue to bring you joy and happiness.
"What the hell are you talking about? God you're an idiot,"
Its funny, we rarely fought and argued and almost made up immediately. It was always over such trivial things. Its so bizarre but I even miss those petty disagreements now, like when we couldn't decide on what movie to watch one night and what we were going to order out. I couldn't help but giggle a lot, annoying you even more. It was just the way your nose crinkled up, you looked so much like your father when you were like that. Even now sometimes I would like to have a stupid tiff over who got the last marshmallow.
"Holding your hand, just simply having our fingers intertwined gives me confidence in myself,"
I'm sorry for forcing it on you, when you could feel those prying eyes on us. I would sometimes forget how self conscious you could be, not that really, but just people looking into our lives. But holding your hand, walking together in the sand, laughing and crying over the smallest things are moments I would never give up. I never told you that it was also you who gave me the confidence to be myself.
"The only thing that matters is that right now, its just you and me,"
I never even thought about reaching that level of adulthood, it never even crossed my mind. Perhaps I was being naïve, that I wanted to hold onto my childhood and not let the innocence go. Honestly, I wanted to shout that I wasn't ready but somehow you were able to relax me and make me comfortable. That night and all of those nights after, every touch, every kiss, every movement I have regretted none of them. I hope that you feel the same about every single one of them.
"You're strong Sora, stronger than you think you are, stronger than I am,"
I never believed that, not even when you said it. You were always the strong one, you could always overcome everything better than me. For once, it was me holding you close as you clinged on for support. You were so frail, so light, I was afraid that you would break even if I tried to pull you closer.
"I'm scared Sora, I'm so scared,"
The way your eyes hid themselves in my chest, it was so heartbreaking. My beautiful love, all of these evil things that were happening, you deserved none of it. I hated that I couldn't do something to stop it, I hate it now that I couldn't do something to save you. Are you still afraid now? I pray that now where you are, there will be nothing that will bring you pain. I hope that somehow, I was able to take away those fears.
"Its okay Sora, I'm always in here and we'll meet each other again".
My tears, my pain, my sadness, everything. Those words struck me with so many needles a thousand times, I could only let them fall and rub my face in your soft hair as you slept in my arms, finally at peace. So many days have passed since then, so many. Yet my only wish has not changed, not even once. I want to see you.
Please wait for me, wait for that day. For when I can show you all the smiles I still continue to make, for all of the stories I have to tell you of the passing years. When that day comes when I can see you again, can I please hold you so tight? That it hurts?