This is just a bonus chapter that came to mind while I was finishing up my story, and couldn't really think of place for it in the main plot. It is written purely out of fun and in no way effects the main plot of this story. I had a lot of fun writing it and hope you all have fun reading it as well ;]
Still don't own One Piece.
Dance the Night Away Bonus Chapter
Name: Roronoa Zoro
Occupation: Wandering Swordsman (keyword being wandering)
Somewhere in the East Blue: Zoro had been traveling the East Blue for the better part of the year on his quest to become the world's greatest swordsman. During this time he had found himself wandering in a large forest on an uncharted island. He had heard from villagers located on the shore of the island that on the other side of the forest there was another small village that consisted of only swordsmen and swordswomen; so he had ventured into the forest to go find that village to test his might against all these fellow swords-masters. He had been walking through that forest for three days.
Though the forest was quite large; a normal person would have been able to traverse through it in only half a days' time. In fact; I myself had been to this same forest and was able to traverse through it in only an hour, and that was with me having to slay 10… no 100 great beasts along the way… but this story isn't about me, it's about Zoro. So where was I? Oh yes… while traveling through the forest and trying to figure out whether or not he had passed that same tree before; Zoro was suddenly toppled over by a female wood-nymph who had been running and not been paying attention to where she was going.
"Urgh…" Zoro groaned, as he found himself on his back with hazy vision from the impact of the fall. "What the hell just happened?"
As his vision started to clear, and he started to get his bearings; he noticed a weight on his chest. The weight was the figure of the wood-nymph. She was quite small compared to him; judging by the difference in height she was only about 4'5'' (137cm) tall. She had very pale skin with pointed ears, and wore a dark-green dress to match both her hair and her eyes.
"Huh?" The small figure moaned, as she too was hazy and confused from the crash. "Oh my; I'm so sorry." She apologized quickly while jumping to her feet after her vision cleared and she noticed she had been on top of Zoro.
Zoro let out a small grunt to confirm that he accepted her apology as he started to stand to his own feet. Noticing the size of the man in front of her, and his green hair; the wood-nymph's eyes widened and a relieved look replaced her confused face. "Oh thank the forest spirits! You're a fellow wood-nymph! You must help me."
"Eh…" Zoro responded even more confused by what she had just said. "I'm not a wood-nymph. I'm a human."
The young woman looked back at him with a blank expression before saying to him "But you have green hair."
"Dammit! There are people in this world that have orange hair, red hair, blue hair, purple hair, pink hair, silver hair, white hair, and light-green hair! No one says shit about any of their hair colors! They only ever comment about my hair color! Why the hell is my hair considered so damn strange?" Zoro screamed while pointing a threatening finger towards the sky.
"Who are you yelling at?" The wood-nymph asked the swordsman.
"Nobody" Zoro said as he lowered his head in defeat before bringing his attention back on to the girl in front of him. "What were you saying about needing help?"
"There is a terrible troll who has been pursuing me. I fear that he may catch up to me at any moment. But since you are not a fellow wood-nymph I couldn't possibly bother you with my troubles."
"A troll huh? Is he strong?"
"Yes, he is very strong." The nymph confirmed.
"This sounds interesting." Zoro said as an amused smile formed on his face. "Alright, I'll help. Just point the way and I'll cut this terrible troll into little pieces."
"Oh no… you can't." The young woman started pleading, which only caused Zoro to get even more confused. "If you kill the troll it would bring destruction on my people. You see… the troll is actually my fiancé. My people made an arrangement with his tribe that the two of us would be married to avoid war when I came of age. I came of age only yesterday and now the troll seeks what was promised to him."
"If I can't kill him, how did you expect me to help when you thought I was a wood-nymph?" Zoro asked in a frustrated tone because it seemed like he no longer had the chance to kill something.
"Well you see…" The wood-nymph started to explain in a very timid voice. "That arrangement is only valid if I had yet to find a suitable husband. And since there are no men in my tribe at the suitable age for me to marry, I thought I was doomed to marry the troll. So I ran. When I saw you, I was gonna ask you to pretend to be my husband."
As Zoro looked down towards the girl, his eyes narrowed with skepticism. He knew he should just bid her farewell and walk away from the whole situation, but a part of him still wanted to help her because of the desperation in her eyes. "And how did you expect to confuse this troll into thinking I was your husband seeing how we don't even know each other?"
"I was going to ask you to perform the Dance of Love with me in front of him." She answered in a matter of fact tone.
"What the hell?" Zoro screamed at her, completely shocked at how bold she was. "We just met! I don't even know your name and you're talking about having sex in front of a troll with a complete stranger! How scary is this damn thing?"
"Sex..?" The girl asked confused. "What is sex? I'm talking about the dance that is shown to all young wood-nymphs by their parents. It is to be performed only with their sole chosen mate, once they come of age."
"And you still don't see a problem with doing this with someone you just met?"
"Well I am kinda desperate. But you know; now since I know you aren't a wood-nymph, the dance wouldn't technically count. So it would be perfect if you performed it with me." The wood-nymph exclaimed with a hopeful look in her eyes. "Oh please help, I beg you."
Zoro looked towards the sky again before saying "This story doesn't even make sense." He then lowered his head before letting out a sigh. "Fine… I'll help you; just tell me what I have to do."
Zoro's response caused the girl to light up. "Really? Thank you so much!" She said cheerily as she embraced him around the midsection in a hug.
"Yeah… Yeah…" Zoro said unenthusiastically, as he removed the girl's arms from around him and separated himself from her. "This is just too damn weird. I don't even know your name."
"My name is Lita. It is a pleasure to meet you." The young woman said in a polite bow. "And what is your name?"
After the two exchanged names they went deeper into the forest so Lita could show Zoro the 'Dance Of Love' which was strangely enough very similar to the 'Classic Waltz'. They practiced for several moments so the two of them could learn how to compensate for the height difference; before being the interrupted by the sound of a voice calling out to the young woman.
"Lita-chwan… where have you gone to my love?"
The female wood-nymph's body went rigid from the sound of the voice, and a terrified expression formed on her face. Zoro was slightly surprised by this because the voice didn't sound threatening in any way. If anything; it sounded like a love sick moron trying to pursue a young woman.
The two stood in place as they could hear soft footsteps approaching their location. Lita, while beginning to shake in fear, quickly got behind Zoro to try and shield herself from the oncoming threat. After several moments the troll finally came into the small clearing that Zoro and Lita had been standing in.
Even more to Zoro's surprise; the troll was nothing like he had envisioned it. He was very well dressed and stood only about 5' (152cm) tall. Besides its ears that pointed out through his long blonde hair that went all the way down his back, and his one visible eyebrow which was long and curled into a spiral pattern; he was actually rather human looking.
Zoro narrowed his eyes as he looked down at the small man in front of him. "This is the troll that you're so scared of?" Zoro addressed Lita as he was pointing a judging finger at said troll.
The troll didn't even bother to look at the swordsman. Instead his vision was caught by the visible green hair standing behind Zoro. "Ah… there you are Lita-chwan. I've been looking all over for you." The small blonde troll said as he sprinted over towards her and Zoro. "I have come to ask for your hand in marriage my love." He said as he dropped down to one knee and extended his hand towards the woman.
"I… I'm sorry Shonto-san." Lita said to the man timidly, while Zoro stood completely still, feeling very awkward. "But I can't marry you. I'm already married."
Shonto's face fell in genuine disappointment after hearing the news from the girl in front of him. "But I don't understand my love. You were engaged to me. Who is the man responsible for stealing your love away from me? Show me this man so I can deem whether he is worthy of your love or not."
Lita gave the young man a confused look before addressing him. "Umm… He is right in front of you Shonto-san. This is my husband Zoro." She explained as she pointed up towards Zoro who only glared down at the troll who had been ignoring him the entire time.
Finally looking up at the swordsman; Shonto's visible eye widened in complete disbelief, causing him to quickly stand and jump backwards to get a better view at the man standing in front of him. "This giant is a wood-nymph? I thought it was a tree. You must be lying to me."
"She already told you that I'm her husband ya little runt." Zoro said firmly, finally joining in on the conversation. "Now why don't you leave her alone and let her be?"
"I still don't believe you." Shonto said, refusing to back down. "If you really are her husband, then you must have performed the dance of love with her. Prove it."
"Tch… Fine" Zoro stated looking down at Lita to confirm that the time had come.
The two took their positions. Because of the height difference Zoro wasn't able to place his non-lead hand on the small of her back and had to settle for placing it in between her shoulders instead. While Lita couldn't place her hand on his shoulder and had to place it on his chest. They each took a deep breath before they began their dance.
The two performed the dance perfectly as Shonto looked on in shock. The troll couldn't help but notice the smile on Lita's face as they performed the practiced routine. If he would have looked up at Zoro's, he would had noticed that Zoro's face was completely serious as if he was in the middle of a battle, but the troll had a habit of only paying attention to women.
The dance came to a stop and the two separated to face their audience. "There… satisfied?" Zoro said gruffly while crossing his arms over his chest.
Realizing that he was being addressed; Shonto snapped out of his shock to look at the much larger man. "Yes" The troll said with disappointment clearly visible on his face. "It is obvious that Lita-chwan has found her one true mate. And therefor I will seek her hand no longer. As long as she is happy, that is all that matters. I will go back to my village, where I might one day find my own true love. Goodbye to you both."
"Thank you for understanding Shonto-san. I hope you find happiness too." Lita said, giving the troll a polite bow, before the troll left the two's presence.
Lita and Zoro watched the troll leave in silence before turning and walking in the opposite direction themselves. Lita had decided to show Zoro the way out of the forest and to the village of swordsmen that Zoro had been looking for as thanks for his help. Once to the edge of the forest, with the village in view; Zoro turned to Lita to bid her a final farewell, but before he did, there had been something bothering him for a little while.
"Besides him being a little annoying, that troll didn't really seem all that terrible, why didn't you want to marry him?" Zoro asked the small wood-nymph.
"Well to be honest" Lita began to answer with a blush on her face. "Shonto-san is actually a really good person, but he is kinda a flirt and just not really my type. But you're my type Zoro-san." The girl admitted while a huge smile overtook her face. "Maybe when you've completed your journey, you can come back and visit me. And then maybe we can have that sex thing you mentioned earlier…"
Sanji delivered a thunderous kick to the top of Usopp's head, causing the storyteller to face plant into the dining table in front of him as Luffy, Chopper and Zoro all looked on.
"Ow Sanji, what was that for?" The long-nose voiced his pain.
Sanji pointed a threatening finger at the sniper before listing off all the reasons he had kicked him. "For one: Your damn story didn't make any sense. Two: You made me the damn troll you shitty-long-nose-bastard! And finally: You gave the damn-marimo the girl in the end! It's bad enough I already have to live with the fact that he's involved with my precious Nami-san, I don't need to have to picture the damn bastard being a burden to any other women, fictional or not!"
"But it would only be natural for her to fall for him." Usopp tried to reason. "After all, they did perform the 'Dance of Love' together."
"All you idiots just get the hell out of my kitchen!" The cook screeched out causing Usopp, Chopper, and Luffy to all jump up and flee the kitchen as fast as their feet would carry them. Zoro, who had been sitting quietly for most of the exchange, also stood to leave the kitchen before his rival stopped him. "Not you marimo, it's time for your lesson on how to treat women." The cook's statement caused Zoro to let out a disgruntled groan as he sat back down in his chair.
It had been three weeks since the crew departed from the island of Shaka, and Zoro's romantic relationship with Nami had started. Most of the crew had adapted quickly to the two's open relationship and went back to their daily routines. Even Nami's and Zoro's interactions had pretty much remained the same; they fought and bickered with each other throughout the day, especially in front of the rest of the crew, but it was what happened behind closed doors that changed between the two the most. In fact; it had become an unwritten rule amongst the crew that if neither Zoro nor Nami were on deck, that no one was supposed to go looking for them. Luffy had of course forgotten this several times, and had been the victim of both of their rages on several different occasions.
The only person who hadn't gone back to his normal routine was Sanji. He still openly flirted with both Robin and Nami, as well as fought with Zoro all the time, but he had also taken it upon himself to educate the swordsman on how to properly treat women; going as far to make said swordsman sit through lectures twice a week.
Zoro never really pays any attention to these lectures, and even refused to sit through them at first, but with Sanji's threats of hiding all the alcohol, and the cook's constant hounding; Zoro eventually decided it was easier to just humor the man. He has actually got quite good at tuning Sanji out during these so called lectures.
"Are you listening to me marimo?" Sanji questioned the swordsman on whether or not Zoro had heard anything he had been saying for the last several minutes.
"Not really." Zoro confirmed.
"I'm doing this for your benefit you shitty-swordsman!" Sanji screamed at his rival. "It wouldn't kill you to know how to act a little better around both Nami-san and Robin-chan. How Nami-san finds it in her to put up with you is absolutely amazing. "
"Aren't you the one forgetting that I'm the one with an actual girlfriend? Nami and I get along just fine, especially behind closed doors." Zoro said to the cook to rub in the fact that Nami had chosen him. "Besides; you're so clueless that you haven't even realized that the gloomy-woman has been spoken for as well."
"What was that baka?" Sanji asked wanting to know the meaning behind Zoro's last comment.
"Tch… it was nothing." The swordsman answered with a sly grin.
"Oi, if you know something about my precious Robin-chan you better tell me. Otherwise I'll kick your ass all over this damn ship and…"
Sanji was cut off by the sound of the Den-Den-Mushi located on the kitchen counter, causing both men to stare at it in curiosity.
"Purupurupuru" "Purupurupuru" It rang again before Sanji moved over towards it to answer it.
Picking up the receiver, Sanji spoke "Ahoy. This is the Shitty-Restaurant, where we treat all our customers like shit, how can I help you?" This was his normal greeting when answering the Den-Den-Mushi just in case of the marines somehow finding their number.
"Don't sass-mouth me you little twerp!" The Den-Den-Mushi answered him in a feminine loud high pitched shrill voice. "Let me talk to Roronoa Zoro!"
Hearing his name from the Den-Den-Mushi caused Zoro to look over at it with a confused face. Sanji had a similar look on his face as he stared at the receiver wondering how the person on the other end knew his rival was on the ship. "May I ask who is calling?" The cook said in the most polite voice he could, after all; despite not knowing who it was, it did seem to be a lady, and he could never be rude to a lady.
"NO YOU MAY NOT!" The voice on the other end screamed very harshly. "NOW PUT RORONOA ON THE LINE RIGHT NOW!"
Growing very intimidated by the voice on the other end; Sanji quickly outstretched the Den-Den-Mushi towards the swordsman, almost begging for him to take it. Zoro looked at it skeptically for a moment before standing up and crossing the room to take it from his rival.
"This is Zoro" he spoke into the receiver in a harsh tone. "Now who the hell is this?"
"RORONOA ZORO! HOW DARE YOU?!" The voice continued to scream out of the Den-Den-Mushi, causing Zoro to stretch it out away from him as he cringed in pain from the ringing in his ears. "Not only have you betrayed the feelings of a young beautiful woman who has pledged her heart to you, but you also abuse what she has taught you with for the entire world to see, you two-timing man-whore."
After hearing the feminine voice on the Den-Den-Mushi say that it had been betrayed by the swordsman; Sanji felt his blood start to boil, and prepared to give his rival a tongue lashing of his own. But before he spoke a single syllable, he stopped himself as he noticed the other man's entire body go rigid, and his once tan skin turn pale white as genuine fear gripped Zoro's face.
"Pa… Parom Sensei?" Zoro questioned through stuttered speech, as his hand holding the Den-Den-Mushi shook rapidly.
"Oh, so you do remember me?" Zoro's old dance instructor confirmed. "Maybe you should have remembered me before you and that orange-haired harlot locked lips on that dance stage. Did you think I wouldn't find out? I still get the monthly copy of 'Dance Piece'."
"Ho… How did you get this number?" Zoro asked the older lady, as he tried to process everything that was happening so quickly.
"Don't worry about that." Parom responded to him. "Instead; do you know how much it costs to hire a Commercial Liner to sail from the East Blue to the New World? You should be worried about what I'm going to do to you and that orange-haired hussy once I get my hands on you!"
"Oi..! Mina*..!" Zoro and Sanji heard Luffy yell from the deck. "I see a ship heading towards us!"
The cook and the swordsman looked at each other for a brief moment before Zoro dropped the Den-Den-Mushi to the floor of the kitchen, and the two then ran out onto the deck to see what their captain was yelling about. After exiting the kitchen; they noticed Luffy pointing over the Starboard rail towards a ship that was heading in their direction. Both Zoro and Sanji quickly crossed over to the bow of the ship where all of their nakama had gathered near the helm.
"Oi Franky!" Zoro screamed at the cyborg that was standing at the helm. "Get us the hell out of here and as far away from that ship as fast as you can!"
The entire crew looked over at the swordsman with confused looks before Franky spoke up. "What's going on swords-bro? What's the big hurry to get away from that ship for?"
"Yeah Zoro" Nami chimed in, curious to know why her lover had the frightened expression on his face. "It doesn't look like a Pirate Ship, and it's certainly not a Navy Battle Ship. It looks like just a common Commercial Liner. Maybe they need help or something. Why else would they be heading towards a Pirate Ship?"
As the Commercial Liner got closer, the crew could see a small figure standing at the bow of the ship. The figure belonged to a short wrinkly old lady with visibly gray hair, and even from the distance they were still at; they could all see the clearly visible angry look on her face as her ship continued to approach theirs. At the sight of his old dance instructor Zoro could feel his chest start to tighten, and it was getting hard for him to breathe as panic started to sink in.
"Mina look" Luffy spoke up, again pointing towards the oncoming ship. "There is a baba* on the ship holding a megaphone."
Lifting the megaphone to her mouth; Parom started barking out orders to her former student and the rest of his unsuspecting nakama. "Roronoa Zoro; you better not even think about running, you stay right there and wait for your punishment. And as for you, you little orange-haired harlot; how dare you put your lips on my man. When I get a hold of you I'm gonna rip out every little hair on that pretty little head of yours!"
Shocked expressions over took the faces of all of the Straw-hats as eyes turned to face the happy couple. "Zoro" Nami spoke to the swordsman. "That isn't your old dance instructor Parom is it?" Zoro could only give her and everyone a slight nod as an answer. "You heard him Franky. Get us the hell out of here!" Nami screamed as the realization of impending danger sunk in.
"Ow! Sure thing Nami-sis!" Franky yelled out as he left the bow to go to the lower levels and make the preparations for their escape. "Once everyone gets the sails tied up they better hold on to something, because this is gonna be SUPER!"
"You heard the man; get those sails tied up!" Nami yelled out, snapping everyone out of their shocked states to get to work.
With the Commercial Liner quickly closing in, the boys finished tying the sails up and then all returned to the bow of the ship. And just as they could all hear the shrill high pitched laugh of Parom growing ever closer; Franky's voice was heard over the intercom. "Are ya all ready? Cause here we go… COUP DE BURST!" With a huge thrust of energy; the Straw-hats and their beloved ship went flying off into the sunset away from another fearsome enemy, leaving the dance instructor Parom to curse at them while she watched them fly off into the distance.
Mina = everyone
Baba = old person
Author Notes, Plus Poll Request, and Challenge:
So there it is people; my bonus chapter that I just couldn't help but write because I couldn't get the idea out of my head otherwise. I hope ya all enjoyed it. Thank you again to everyone who has read this story; all of your guys/gals kind words and encouragement made this entire story even better to write. And a special thank you to KimuraMinami for helping me with the baba translation.
For my next project I was hoping to write one of my AU ideas. I have a poll on my profile page where anyone can go vote for which one they want to see first. The general plot descriptions are also given on my profile page under Stories I Would Like To Write. And anyone who votes for the Fairy Tale AU (an actual fairy tale, not to be confused with the anime show) I would love to hear suggestions of what I should name it; feel free to PM if you have any suggestions. The polls gonna be up for a while because I plan on writing a couple of one-shots before I get to my next multi-chap; including one for Zoro's upcoming birthday which is November 11th, whew… that's coming up quick, I better get to work on that.
Finally I would also like to take this time to put out a challenge. This challenge if for EVERYBODY: I challenge you all to do more for your favorite fandoms (I would love it if all your favorite fandoms were ZoNa, but if it's not, that's okay too). Like a lot of people when I first started reading fanfiction I used to say "There is no way I could ever write one myself. I'm just not that good. No one would want to read it." But then I decided what the hell; I'm not gonna be doing it for money or anything, it's just for fun, what is the worse that could happen? And everyone has been really kind and supportive. So I say to everyone: Write a story, draw a picture, and if you still feel like you can't, then review to some of the stories you read (don't leave nasty/mean reviews, but also don't be afraid to give someone some constructive criticism), become part of the community, you'd be surprised how much fun it is to just talk with other likeminded people. And above all else: Quit telling yourself you can't contribute, because of course you can. The best advice I think I've ever given to anybody is: If you have a big goofy smile on your face while writing/drawing something, most likely the readers/viewers will have a similar big goofy smile on their face too.
Until next time –fmdevil-