Hello! Sorry this took so long to update :P
By the way, my novel, 'Me and Mine' and m/m gay priest romance, is available FREE on amazon for the next four days. There are links on my profile page.
Things at home had gotten really awkward.
Finn and Sam had been getting along (at least as well as they could, given their combined history with Quinn and their clashes over football) they'd kind of had to, with Sam staying with them while his parents were trying to find a place to stay back in town.
Since Finn and Kurt's parents had gotten married, they'd moved, and Finn had his own room, which, up until that weekend, he'd been sharing with Sam.
Now, even though it still looked like sharing – Finn never really spent time with Sam at home. He saw him in school, in glee, and at dinner. They never spoke, aside from a forced little 'hi' or 'morning'. Sam went out of his way to make sure that they didn't touch, not even when they had to sit next to each other on the couch. No one seemed to have noticed that anything was wrong. Finn supposed it looked just the same to everyone else. They were even still sharing a room. But, Sam changed in the bathroom, and, once everyone had gone to bed, Sam would leave the bedroom and go downstairs to sleep on the couch.
It took a week and a half for Finn to call him on it.
It was dark, and everything in the house was quiet when Sam slid out of his makeshift bed on the floor, wearing a long pair of sweats and a long sleeved shirt. He crept over the floor to the bedroom door and turned the handle. But it was locked.
"I've got the key." Finn snapped on the lamp by his bed and sat up, sick of pretending to sleep when, each night, Sam's sneaking out hurt more than the last. "Are we ever going to talk about what happened?"
Sam's face was harder than Finn had ever seen it. "Give me the key."
"Not until you talk to me." Finn furrowed his brow. "I'm sick of you treating me like I'm...contagious, or something."
Sam's face went dark. "You expect things to be normal after what you did to me?"
"I didn't do anything..."
"You invited me to a freaking sex party." Sam hissed vehemently. "How is that normal? What the hell did you think it was going to be like after that?"
"You're okay with Kurt...I didn't know you were such a..."
"Don't. Okay? Don't make this about Kurt, or Blaine, or...gay guys in general. You told me yourself, you're not gay – which makes what you're doing, what you tired to bring me into – completely unnatural."
"So...you're mad at me, for...what? inviting you? Or for enjoying what you turned down?" Finn's voice twisted with lack of understanding, and Sam's cheeks darkened with a furious blush.
Finn wasn't dumb, for all that people seemed to think he was. Okay, so he didn't get stuff like math sometimes, and yeah, he'd say things without thinking them through – but he knew when something was just plain wrong. Him and Puck? Weird, but not wrong.
This situation right here though, that was playing out in his bedroom? – that was wrong.
He frowned at Sam. "Is...is that it? You're angry because...you wish you'd stayed. And you think it's my fault for inviting you?"
Sam's glare intensified. "Shut up."
"You wanted to stay with me and Puck." Finn's almost surprised. He'd expected Sam to be cool with it at the time, but now, when Sam had been so vocal in hating them... "You still want it? Us?"
Sam jerked his stare away from Finn and looked down at the floor on his left.
"You're not getting out of this room 'till you talk to me." Finn murmured.
Sam threw him a burning glare, and scrambled back into his bed, turning to face the wall, blocking Finn out.
Finn climbed out of bed and crossed the room, dropping into a crouch by Sam's tense body.
"I know how much it sucks, being lonely, having no one there to just be with..."
Sam kicked out at him, feet tangled in blankets, Finn dodged the attack, and caught Sam's covered ankles in his hands. Sam struggled, and Finn let go almost immediately.
"Leave me alone." Sam muttered, but Finn could tell he wasn't angry anymore. Mostly he just sounded tired.
"I'm going to...just, stop acting like I'm a freak, just because I like having someone there for me." Finn said quietly, standing up and padding back to bed. He got back under the sheets, and clicked off the lamp, lying on his side in the dark and feeling the silence around him grow a heart, and eyes, and teeth.
"Why Puck?" Sam asked, eventually.
"He was there." Finn knew it was more than that. Without Puck, it probably never would have happened. Puck had the kind of attitude that meant he didn't care, about what people thought, about what he should think. He just...decided, and went with it. Finn didn't know anyone else like that, and he knew that he'd never have made the first move with any other guy.
Another long, strained silence filled the space between their beds.
"You can do better."
"He's my friend." Finn said, defensively.
Sam snorted. "He got your girlfriend pregnant, and he made out with Rachel...He's a selfish ass."
Finn couldn't argue. What he said instead was – "He doesn't just take stuff."
"I bet." Sam's voice cracks a little, and Finn turns his face into the cool softness of his pillow, his throat feeling tight.
"So, what do you do?" Sam asks, and Finn feels his skin prickle.
"You don't want to know."
"No...just, you didn't want to stick around, and every time I try to talk to you, you get mad...so, I figure you don't want to know. And you're just asking to make me feel bad about it."
Sam's silent for a while.
"Just...we just talk, and do regular guy stuff..."
"And then...we were drunk, it was a cold night, it happened. In the trunk of a car. It just happened, and then...I don't know, it kept happening - neither of us want to stop."
"...what happened in the car?"
Finn lay on his back, and drew in a breath that sounded too loud in the darkness. "We touched, by accident...then we started kissing..." he licked his suddenly too dry lips. "He's...a really, good, kisser." He could feel himself flushing. "He put his hands under my shirt...wait, maybe I put mine under his? Anyway, it felt, like when a chick does it, but a little different...then we took our shirts off – that really was. Different, I mean."
Blankets rustle and Finn forces himself to stay still, the stagey rustle happens again, and he tips his head sideways on the pillow, watching Sam's body as it arches a little off the floor, wriggling.
He looks quickly away, but he knows now. Sam's getting out of his sweats.
Finn's heart beats a little faster, but he goes on with his story. "Then, uh...our pants. Underwear. My underwear anyway, Puck wasn't wearing any. And...then we were naked."
"And then?" Sam's voice is surrounded by the sounds of his tongue sliding deliciously, his wet lips parting. Even his breath sounds hot and humid.
"We were, uh...rubbing, together...like when you're making out with a girl, only...without clothes, and he was a guy so..."
"You could feel him?"
Finn definitely wasn't imagining the need that seemed to swell in Sam's voice with each passing second. His skin got a little hotter, and Finn could feel himself start to flush and sweat - turned on by Sam's voice. Not even by the words he was saying, but the voice, and what Finn knew Sam was doing to himself.
"I could feel him." Finn licked his lips again, and found himself almost panting. "I...um...he was already...hard." The word foreign in his mouth – he never used it out loud with girls, and definitely not around guys. Not even Puck. "Against my leg...he rubbed it on me, on my thigh. It was...weird. Uh...kinda familiar, but different? And he was heavy and, touching me..."
"How'd it feel?"
And this time Finn hears without a doubt what Sam is doing, the shuffle of blankets, and the almost frantic, half muffled sounds of his hand under the sheets.
"Want me to show you?" The words come out on accident, and Finn blinks of a few seconds, unsure as to what he's just said.
Sam, and his fist, go abruptly still.
"What you're doing? You know it would feel a whole lot better if someone was doing it with you...and, I'm here. I want to."
Silence greets his proposal.
Finn sighs, frustrated and embarrassed. "You spend all that time working out, and...no one ever gets to see you...you don't get anything from the girls and...maybe if you did, you wouldn't feel so crappy all the time..."
A weight dipped the edge of the bed.
Finn sat up, and saw the naked shadow of Sam, painted grey and blurry by the shadows. The other boy's teeth sat firmly in the softness of his lip, and his body was locked up with the cold, and nervousness.
Finn pulled back the sheets and let Sam crawl on top of him. Then he covered them back over.