The Romantic Type
Pairing: David and Griffin (Jumper)
"A date?" Griffin managed to pull his eyes from the video game long enough to give the fellow jumper a look of "are you being serio- oh god, you're being serious".
"Yeah, you know, because couples do that kind of stuff. Dates, holding hands-" Griffin dropped the controller in his lap, bit his knuckle and pointed at David, leaning forward to make sure David unmistakably understood what he was about to say.
"I don't hold hands. I will never hold your hand. Don't ever mention holding hands again unless you want me to sever them from your stupid arms. Now listen up, this date thing? I've been jumping much longer than you have, Dave, there's not a single place on this planet you could take me that I haven't already been. Where would we even go, hm?" David chewed on his bottom lip for a second and followed up with his lovely dopey grin. This was, as Griffin learned over time, a sure sign that David was about challenge him or say something that he knew was going to hit a nerve.
"Wrists. Technically, you'd be severing them from my wrists." Controller instantly back in his hands and eyes clearly being forced on the screen before he hurt the little bastard. "Seriously, though, we've been… growing kind of distant-"
"I'm sorry, should I start using pet names? Muffin cakes? Sugar buns? Silly bunny?."
"That's funny, you're funny." Griffin gave a satisfied smirk. David turned the television off. Griffin tossed the controller up and crossed his arms when it hit the ground. David gave a satisfied smirk. "South Texas."
"What about it?"
"The people are friendly, surfing's great on the Gulf Coast, tex-mex food and cows… Lots and lots of cows. Long horns, to be exact." David lifted his arms to give a demonstration on how long said long horns can be and mouthed the word "long".
"I hate friendly people, I hate surfing, tex-mex gives me the shits and when you say long horn, do you mean their actual horns or are you talking about their junk?" David rolled his eyes and dropped his hands dramatically in defeat.
"Dave, you kinky bastard, I had no idea you were into that!" David bit his lip and kicked Griffin's legs before jumping to the kitchen of their new little lair. Griffin followed shortly and jumped at him, slamming him into the fridge and pinning his hands up against the cold metal door. "Listen, princess, I get it, you lived eight glorious years as a naïve little brat who robbed banks and jumped anywhere on the world to get laid whenever you felt like it, and even then, you spent another seven months with that Millie girl of yours who wound up not being able to handle her boyfriend being hunted down day in and day out. I've spent my entire life hiding and killing off the Paladins, I haven't exactly had time to go off and have a relationship. So pardon me for not exactly being "boyfriend material". I don't date. I don't hold hands. I don't cuddle. I don't do romance. But I'll tell you one thing I do do, I fuck like no one you've ever fucked before. So if you're at least down for that, then I am too. But-that's-it."
Bottom lip being chewed.
Dopey grin slips into view.
"You're holding my hand. Both of them, actually. So if you were lying about holding hands, then clearly, you must be lying about dating, cuddling and romancing as well."
"I don't think you understand just how often I have to fight off the urge to drop you in that favorite shark pit of mine down by Cuba." David's face lit up. Oh god. He had an idea. Why does he always have to get ideas?
"Swimming with sharks! Seriously, it's loads of fun, there's this place in Hawaii where you can do it, we should go do that!" Griffin growled in his throat and pushed away, he wasn't sure if fucking David would even be worth it anymore. Yeah, he was attractive, and the innocence about him just made Griffin want to defile him to the deepest level, but holy fucking shit was this guy annoying. He fought so hard every day not to beat the living shit out of him just so he'll shut up and his taste in music and clothes just made him gag. Not to mention his choice in cologne, it was disgusting, like old rotted broccoli and lettuce mixed with lavender. Everything about this kid drove Griffin insane and he couldn't stand how impossibly stubborn the prick was. "If you go on the date, I'll stop wearing my cologne. I know you don't like it."
Griffin quirked an eyebrow.
"May it never be said that David Rice can't negotiate."
"If I go on the date, you'll stop wearing the cologne and you'll stop interrupting me when I'm playing my video games."
"Deal. Now let's go on your stupid date."